Socrates.:Is the power of speaking, pray, implanted in your nature?
Σωκράτης:ἔνεστι δῆτα μανθάνειν ἐν τῇ φύσει;
Strepsiades.:Speaking is not in me, but cheating is.
Στρεψιάδης:λέγειν μὲν οὐκ ἔνεστʼ, ἀποστερεῖν δʼ ἔνι.
Socrates.:How, then, will you be able to learn?Strepsiades.:Excellently, of course.
Σωκράτης:πῶς οὖν δυνήσει μανθάνειν;Στρεψιάδης:ἀμέλει καλῶς.
Socrates.:Come, then, take care that, whenever I propound any clever dogma about abstruse matters, you catch it up immediately.
Σωκράτης:ἄγε νυν ὅπως, ὅταν τι προβάλλω σοι σοφὸνπερὶ τῶν μετεώρων, εὐθέως ὑφαρπάσει.
Strepsiades.:What then? Am I to feed upon wisdom like a dog?
Στρεψιάδης:τί δαί; κυνηδὸν τὴν σοφίαν σιτήσομαι;
Socrates.:This man is ignorant and brutish--I fear, old man, lest you will need blows. Come, let me see; what do you do if any one beat you?Strepsiades.:I take the beating; and then, when I have waited a little while, I call witnesses to prove it; then again, after a short interval, I go to law.
Σωκράτης:ἄνθρωπος ἀμαθὴς οὑτοσὶ καὶ βάρβαρος.δέδοικά σʼ ὦ πρεσβῦτα μὴ πληγῶν δέει.φέρʼ ἴδω τί δρᾷς, ἤν τίς σε τύπτῃ;Στρεψιάδης:τύπτομαι,ἔπειτʼ ἐπισχὼν ὀλίγον ἐπιμαρτύρομαι,εἶτʼ αὖθις ἀκαρῆ διαλιπὼν δικάζομαι.
Socrates.:Come, then, lay down your cloak.Strepsiades.:Have I done any wrong?
Σωκράτης:ἴθι νυν κατάθου θοἰμάτιον.Στρεψιάδης:ἠδίκηκά τι;
Socrates.:No; but it is the rule to enter naked.
Σωκράτης:οὔκ, ἀλλὰ γυμνοὺς εἰσιέναι νομίζεται.
Strepsiades.:But I do not enter to search for stolen goods.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ οὐχὶ φωράσων ἔγωγʼ εἰσέρχομαι.
Socrates.:Lay it down. Why do you talk nonsense?Strepsiades.:Now tell me this, pray.
Σωκράτης:κατάθου. τί ληρεῖς;Στρεψιάδης:εἰπὲ δή νύν μοι·Σωκράτης:τὸ τί;
If I be diligent and learn zealously, to which of your disciples shall I become like?
Στρεψιάδης:ἢν ἐπιμελὴς ὦ καὶ προθύμως μανθάνω,τῷ τῶν μαθητῶν ἐμφερὴς γενήσομαι;
Socrates.:You will no way differ from Chaerephon in intellect.
Σωκράτης:οὐδὲν διοίσεις Χαιρεφῶντος τὴν φύσιν.
Strepsiades.:Ah me, unhappy! I shall become half-dead.
Στρεψιάδης:οἴμοι κακοδαίμων ἡμιθνὴς γενήσομαι.
Socrates.:Don’t chatter; but quickly follow me hither with smartness.Strepsiades.:Then give me first into my hands a honeyed cake; for I am afraid of descending within, as if into the cave of Trophonius.
Σωκράτης:οὐ μὴ λαλήσεις, ἀλλʼ ἀκολουθήσεις ἐμοὶἀνύσας τι δευρὶ θᾶττον;Στρεψιάδης:ἐς τὼ χεῖρέ νυνδός μοι μελιτοῦτταν πρότερον· ὡς δέδοικʼ ἐγὼεἴσω καταβαίνων ὥσπερ ἐς Τροφωνίου.
Socrates.:Proceed; why do you keep poking about the door?Exeunt Socrates and Strepsiades.
Σωκράτης:χώρει· τί κυπτάζεις ἔχων περὶ τὴν θύραν;
Chorus.:Well, go in peace, for the sake of this your valour. May prosperity attend the man, because, being advanced into the vale of years,he imbues his intellect with modern subjects, and cultivates wisdom!Turning to the audience.
Χορός:ἀλλʼ ἴθι χαίρων τῆς ἀνδρείαςοὕνεκα ταύτης.εὐτυχία γένοιτο τἀνθρώπῳ,ὅτι προήκωνἐς βαθὺ τῆς ἡλικίαςνεωτέροις τὴν φύσιν αὑτοῦπράγμασιν χρωτίζεταικαὶ σοφίαν ἐπασκεῖ.
Chorus.:Spectators, I will freely declare to you the truth, by Bacchus, who nurtured me!
Χορός:ὦ θεώμενοι κατερῶ πρὸς ὑμᾶς ἐλευθέρωςτἀληθῆ νὴ τὸν Διόνυσον τὸν ἐκθρέψαντά με.
So may I conquer, and be accounted skillful, as that, deeming you to be clever spectators, and this to be the cleverest of my comedies, I thought proper to let you first taste that comedy, which gave me the greatest labour. And then I retired from the contest defeated by vulgar fellows,though I did not deserve it. These things, therefore, I object to you, a learned audience, for whose sake I was expending this labour. But not even thus will I ever willingly desert the discerning portion of you. For since what time my Modest Man and my Rake were very highly praised here by an audience, with whom it is a pleasure even to hold converse, and I (for I was still a virgin, and it was not lawful for me as yet to have children)exposed my offspring, and another girl took it up, and owned it, and you generously reared and educated it, from this time I have had sure pledges of your good will toward me. Now, therefore, like that well-known Electra, has this comedy come seeking,if haply it meet with an audience so clever, for it will recognize, if it should see, the lock of its brother. But see how modest she is by nature, who, in the first place, has come, having stitched to her no leathern phallus hanging down, red at the top, and thick, to set the boys a laughing;
οὕτω νικήσαιμί τʼ ἐγὼ καὶ νομιζοίμην σοφός,ὡς ὑμᾶς ἡγούμενος εἶναι θεατὰς δεξιοὺςκαὶ ταύτην σοφώτατʼ ἔχειν τῶν ἐμῶν κωμῳδιῶν,πρώτους ἠξίωσʼ ἀναγεῦσʼ ὑμᾶς, ἣ παρέσχε μοιἔργον πλεῖστον· εἶτʼ ἀνεχώρουν ὑπʼ ἀνδρῶν φορτικῶνἡττηθεὶς οὐκ ἄξιος ὤν· ταῦτʼ οὖν ὑμῖν μέμφομαιτοῖς σοφοῖς, ὧν οὕνεκʼ ἐγὼ ταῦτʼ ἐπραγματευόμην.ἀλλʼ οὐδʼ ὣς ὑμῶν ποθʼ ἑκὼν προδώσω τοὺς δεξιούς.ἐξ ὅτου γὰρ ἐνθάδʼ ὑπʼ ἀνδρῶν, οἷς ἡδὺ καὶ λέγειν,ὁ σώφρων τε χὠ καταπύγων ἄριστʼ ἠκουσάτην,κἀγώ, παρθένος γὰρ ἔτʼ ἦν, κοὐκ ἐξῆν πώ μοι τεκεῖν,ἐξέθηκα, παῖς δʼ ἑτέρα τις λαβοῦσʼ ἀνείλετο,ὑμεῖς δʼ ἐξεθρέψατε γενναίως κἀπαιδεύσατε·ἐκ τούτου μοι πιστὰ παρʼ ὑμῖν γνώμης ἔσθʼ ὅρκια.νῦν οὖν Ἠλέκτραν κατʼ ἐκείνην ἥδʼ ἡ κωμῳδίαζητοῦσʼ ἦλθʼ, ἤν που ʼπιτύχῃ θεαταῖς οὕτω σοφοῖς·γνώσεται γάρ, ἤνπερ ἴδῃ, τἀδελφοῦ τὸν βόστρυχον.ὡς δὲ σώφρων ἐστὶ φύσει σκέψασθʼ· ἥτις πρῶτα μὲνοὐδὲν ἦλθε ῥαψαμένη σκυτίον καθειμένονἐρυθρὸν ἐξ ἄκρου παχύ, τοῖς παιδίοις ἵνʼ ᾖ γέλως·
nor yet jeered the bald-headed, nor danced the cordax; nor does the old man who speaks the verses beat the person near him with his staff, keeping out of sight wretched ribaldry; nor has she rushed in with torches, nor does she shout iou, iou; but has come relying on herself and her verses.
οὐδʼ ἔσκωψε τοὺς φαλακρούς, οὐδὲ κόρδαχʼ εἵλκυσεν,οὐδὲ πρεσβύτης ὁ λέγων τἄπη τῇ βακτηρίᾳτύπτει τὸν παρόντʼ ἀφανίζων πονηρὰ σκώμματα,οὐδʼ εἰσῇξε δᾷδας ἔχουσʼ, οὐδʼ ἰοὺ ἰοὺ βοᾷ,ἀλλʼ αὑτῇ καὶ τοῖς ἔπεσιν πιστεύουσʼ ἐλήλυθεν.
And I, although so excellent a poet, do not give myself airs, nor do I seek to deceive you by twice and thrice bringing forward the same pieces; but I am always clever at introducing new fashions, not at all resembling each other, and all of them clever; who struck Cleon in the belly when at the height of his power,and could not bear to attack him afterward when he was down. But these scribblers, when once Hyperbolus has given them a handle, keep ever trampling on this wretched man and his mother. Eupolis, indeed, first of all craftily introduced his Maricas, having basely, base fellow, spoiled by altering my play of the Knights,having added to it, for the sake of the cordax, a drunken old woman, whom Phrynichus long ago poetized, whom the whale was for devouring. Then again Hermippus made verses on Hyperbolus; and now all others press hard upon Hyperbolus, imitating my simile of the eels.
κἀγὼ μὲν τοιοῦτος ἀνὴρ ὢν ποιητὴς οὐ κομῶ,οὐδʼ ὑμᾶς ζητῶ ʼξαπατᾶν δὶς καὶ τρὶς ταὔτʼ εἰσάγων,ἀλλʼ ἀεὶ καινὰς ἰδέας ἐσφέρων σοφίζομαι,οὐδὲν ἀλλήλαισιν ὁμοίας καὶ πάσας δεξιάς·ὃς μέγιστον ὄντα Κλέωνʼ ἔπαισʼ ἐς τὴν γαστέρα,κοὐκ ἐτόλμησʼ αὖθις ἐπεμπηδῆσʼ αὐτῷ κειμένῳ.οὗτοι δʼ, ὡς ἅπαξ παρέδωκεν λαβὴν Ὑπέρβολος,τοῦτον δείλαιον κολετρῶσʼ ἀεὶ καὶ τὴν μητέρα.Εὔπολις μὲν τὸν Μαρικᾶν πρώτιστον παρείλκυσενἐκστρέψας τοὺς ἡμετέρους Ἱππέας κακὸς κακῶς,προσθεὶς αὐτῷ γραῦν μεθύσην τοῦ κόρδακος οὕνεχʼ, ἣνΦρύνιχος πάλαι πεποίηχʼ, ἣν τὸ κῆτος ἤσθιεν.εἶθʼ Ἕρμιππος αὖθις ἐποίησεν εἰς Ὑπέρβολον,ἄλλοι τʼ ἤδη πάντες ἐρείδουσιν εἰς Ὑπέρβολον,τὰς εἰκοὺς τῶν ἐγχέλεων τὰς ἐμὰς μιμούμενοι.
Whoever, therefore, laughs at these, let him not take pleasure in my attempts; but if you are delighted with me and my inventions, in times to come you will seem to be wise.
ὅστις οὖν τούτοισι γελᾷ, τοῖς ἐμοῖς μὴ χαιρέτω·ἢν δʼ ἐμοὶ καὶ τοῖσιν ἐμοῖς εὐφραίνησθʼ εὑρήμασιν,ἐς τὰς ὥρας τὰς ἑτέρας εὖ φρονεῖν δοκήσετε.
Chorus.:I first invoke, to join our choral band, the mighty Jupiter, ruling on high,the monarch of gods; and the potent master of the trident, the fierce upheaver of earth and briny sea; and our father of great renown,most august Aether, life-supporter of all; and the horse-guider, who fills the plain of the earth with exceeding bright beams, a mighty deity among gods and mortals.
Χορός:ὑψιμέδοντα μὲν θεῶνΖῆνα τύραννον ἐς χορὸνπρῶτα μέγαν κικλήσκω·τόν τε μεγασθενῆ τριαίνης ταμίαν,γῆς τε καὶ ἁλμυρᾶς θαλάσσης ἄγριον μοχλευτήν·καὶ μεγαλώνυμον ἡμέτερον πατέρʼΑἰθέρα σεμνότατον βιοθρέμμονα πάντων·τόν θʼ ἱππονώμαν, ὃς ὑπερλάμπροιςἀκτῖσιν κατέχειγῆς πέδον μέγας ἐν θεοῖςἐν θνητοῖσί τε δαίμων.
Chorus.:Most clever spectators, come, give us your attention; for having been injured, we blame you to your faces. For though we benefit the state most of all the gods, to us alone of the deities you do not offer sacrifice nor yet pour libations, who watch over you. For if there should be any expeditionwithout prudence, then we either thunder or drizzle small rain. And then, when you were for choosing as your general the Paphlagonian tanner, hateful to the gods, we contracted our brows and were enraged; and thunder burst through the lightning; and the Moon forsook her usual paths; and the Sunimmediately drew in his wick to himself, and declared he would not give you light, if Cleon should be your general. Nevertheless you chose him. For they say that ill counsel is in this city; that the gods, however, turn all these your mismanagements to a prosperous issue.
Χορός:ὦ σοφώτατοι θεαταὶ δεῦρο τὸν νοῦν προσέχετε.ἠδικημέναι γὰρ ὑμῖν μεμφόμεσθʼ ἐναντίον·πλεῖστα γὰρ θεῶν ἁπάντων ὠφελούσαις τὴν πόλιν,δαιμόνων ἡμῖν μόναις οὐ θύετʼ οὐδὲ σπένδετε,αἵτινες τηροῦμεν ὑμᾶς. ἢν γὰρ ᾖ τις ἔξοδοςμηδενὶ ξὺν νῷ, τότʼ ἢ βροντῶμεν ἢ ψακάζομεν.εἶτα τὸν θεοῖσιν ἐχθρὸν βυρσοδέψην Παφλαγόναἡνίχʼ ᾑρεῖσθε στρατηγόν, τὰς ὀφρῦς συνήγομενκἀποιοῦμεν δεινά, βροντὴ δʼ ἐρράγη διʼ ἀστραπῆς·ἡ σελήνη δʼ ἐξέλειπε τὰς ὁδούς, ὁ δʼ ἥλιοςτὴν θρυαλλίδʼ εἰς ἑαυτὸν εὐθέως ξυνελκύσαςοὐ φανεῖν ἔφασκεν ὑμῖν, εἰ στρατηγήσει Κλέων.ἀλλʼ ὅμως εἵλεσθε τοῦτον. φασὶ γὰρ δυσβουλίαντῇδε τῇ πόλει προσεῖναι, ταῦτα μέντοι τοὺς θεοὺςἅττʼ ἂν ὑμεῖς ἐξαμάρτητʼ ἐπὶ τὸ βέλτιον τρέπειν.
And how this also shall be advantageous, we will easily teach you. If you should convict the cormorant Cleon of bribery and embezzlement, and then make fast his neck in the stocks, the affair will turn out for the state to the ancient form again, if you have mismanaged in any way, and to a prosperous issue.
ὡς δὲ καὶ τοῦτο ξυνοίσει ῥᾳδίως διδάξομεν·ἢν Κλέωνα τὸν λάρον δώρων ἑλόντες καὶ κλοπῆςεἶτα φιμώσητε τούτου τῷ ξύλῳ τὸν αὐχένα,αὖθις ἐς τἀρχαῖον ὑμῖν, εἴ τι κἀξημάρτετε,ἐπὶ τὸ βέλτιον τὸ πρᾶγμα τῇ πόλει συνοίσεται.
Chorus.:Hear me again, King Phoebus, Delian Apollo, who inhabitest the high-peaked Cynthian rock! And thou, blessed goddess, who inhabitest the all-golden house of Ephesus,in which Lydian damsels greatly reverence thee; and thou, our national goddess, swayer of the aegis, Minerva, guardian of the city! And thou, reveler Bacchus, who, inhabiting the Parnassian rock, sparklest with torches,conspicuous among the Delphic Bacchanals!
Χορός:ἀμφί μοι αὖτε Φοῖβʼ ἄναξΔήλιε Κυνθίαν ἔχωνὑψικέρατα πέτραν,ἥ τʼ Ἐφέσου μάκαιρα πάγχρυσον ἔχειςοἶκον ἐν ᾧ κόραι σε Λυδῶν μεγάλως σέβουσιν,ἥ τʼ ἐπιχώριος ἡμετέρα θεὸςαἰγίδος ἡνίοχος πολιοῦχος Ἀθάνα,Παρνασσίαν θʼ ὃς κατέχωνπέτραν σὺν πεύκαις σελαγεῖΒάκχαις Δελφίσιν ἐμπρέπων,κωμαστὴς Διόνυσος.
Chorus.:When we had got ready to set out hither, the Moon met us, and commanded us first to greet the Athenians and their allies;
Χορός:ἡνίχʼ ἡμεῖς δεῦρʼ ἀφορμᾶσθαι παρεσκευάσμεθα,ἡ σελήνη συντυχοῦσʼ ἡμῖν ἐπέστειλεν φράσαι,πρῶτα μὲν χαίρειν Ἀθηναίοισι καὶ τοῖς ξυμμάχοις·
and then declared that she was angry, for that she had suffered dreadful things, though she benefits you all, not in words, but openly. In the first place, not less than a drachma every month for torches; so that also all, when they went out of an evening, were wont to say, “Boy, don’t buy a torch, for the moonlight is beautiful.”
εἶτα θυμαίνειν ἔφασκε· δεινὰ γὰρ πεπονθέναιὠφελοῦσʼ ὑμᾶς ἅπαντας οὐ λόγοις ἀλλʼ ἐμφανῶς.πρῶτα μὲν τοῦ μηνὸς ἐς δᾷδʼ οὐκ ἔλαττον ἢ δραχμήν,ὥστε καὶ λέγειν ἅπαντας ἐξιόντας ἑσπέρας,μὴ πρίῃ παῖ δᾷδʼ, ἐπειδὴ φῶς σεληναίας καλόν.
And she says she confers other benefits on you, but that you do not observe the days at all correctly, but confuse them up and down; so that she says the gods are constantly threatening her, when they are defrauded of their dinner, and depart home, not having met with the regular feast according to the number of the days.
ἄλλα τʼ εὖ δρᾶν φησιν, ὑμᾶς δʼ οὐκ ἄγειν τὰς ἡμέραςοὐδὲν ὀρθῶς, ἀλλʼ ἄνω τε καὶ κάτω κυδοιδοπᾶν·ὥστʼ ἀπειλεῖν φησιν αὐτῇ τοὺς θεοὺς ἑκάστοτεἡνίκʼ ἂν ψευσθῶσι δείπνου κἀπίωσιν οἴκαδε,τῆς ἑορτῆς μὴ τυχόντες κατὰ λόγον τῶν ἡμερῶν.
And then, when you ought to be sacrificing, you are inflicting tortures and litigating. And often, while we gods are observing a fast, when we mourn for Memnon or Sarpedon, you are pouring libations and laughing. For which reason Hyperbolus, having obtained the lot this year to be Hieromnemon, was afterward deprived by us godsof his crown; for thus he will know better that he ought to spend the days of his life according to the Moon.Enter Socrates.
κᾆθʼ ὅταν θύειν δέῃ, στρεβλοῦτε καὶ δικάζετε·πολλάκις δʼ ἡμῶν ἀγόντων τῶν θεῶν ἀπαστίαν,ἡνίκʼ ἂν πενθῶμεν ἢ τὸν Μέμνονʼ ἢ Σαρπηδόνα,σπένδεθʼ ὑμεῖς καὶ γελᾶτʼ· ἀνθʼ ὧν λαχὼν Ὑπέρβολοςτῆτες ἱερομνημονεῖν, κἄπειθʼ ὑφʼ ἡμῶν τῶν θεῶντὸν στέφανον ἀφῃρέθη· μᾶλλον γὰρ οὕτως εἴσεταικατὰ σελήνην ὡς ἄγειν χρὴ τοῦ βίου τὰς ἡμέρας.
Socrates.:By Respiration, and Chaos, and Air, I have not seen any man so boorish, nor so impracticable, nor so stupid, nor so forgetful;
Σωκράτης:μὰ τὴν Ἀναπνοὴν μὰ τὸ Χάος μὰ τὸν Ἀέραοὐκ εἶδον οὕτως ἄνδρʼ ἄγροικον οὐδέναοὐδʼ ἄπορον οὐδὲ σκαιὸν οὐδʼ ἐπιλήσμονα·
who, while learning some little petty quibbles, forgets them before he has learned them. Nevertheless I will certainly call him out here to the light. Where is Strepsiades? Come forth with your couch.
ὅστις σκαλαθυρμάτιʼ ἄττα μικρὰ μανθάνωνταῦτʼ ἐπιλέλησται πρὶν μαθεῖν· ὅμως γε μὴναὐτὸν καλῶ θύραζε δευρὶ πρὸς τὸ φῶς.ποῦ Στρεψιάδης; ἔξει τὸν ἀσκάντην λαβών;
Strepsiades.:(from within). The bugs do not permit me to bring it forth.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ οὐκ ἐῶσί μʼ ἐξενεγκεῖν οἱ κόρεις.
Socrates.:Make haste and lay it down; and give me your attention.Enter Strepsiades.Strepsiades.:Very well.
Σωκράτης:ἀνύσας τι κατάθου καὶ πρόσεχε τὸν νοῦν.Στρεψιάδης:ἰδού.
Socrates.:Come now; what do you now wish to learn first of those things in none of which you have ever been instructed? Tell me. About measures, or rhythms, or verses?
Σωκράτης:ἄγε δὴ τί βούλει πρῶτα νυνὶ μανθάνεινὧν οὐκ ἐδιδάχθης πώποτʼ οὐδέν; εἰπέ μοι.πότερα περὶ μέτρων ἢ περὶ ἐπῶν ἢ ῥυθμῶν;
Strepsiades.:I should prefer to learn about measures; for it is but lately I was cheated out of two choenices by a meal-huckster.
Στρεψιάδης:περὶ τῶν μέτρων ἔγωγʼ· ἔναγχος γάρ ποτεὑπʼ ἀλφιταμοιβοῦ παρεκόπην διχοινίκῳ.
Socrates.:I do not ask you this, but which you account the most beautiful measure; the trimetre or the tetrameter?
Σωκράτης:οὐ τοῦτʼ ἐρωτῶ σʼ, ἀλλʼ ὅ τι κάλλιστον μέτρονἡγεῖ· πότερα τὸ τρίμετρον ἢ τὸ τετράμετρον;
Strepsiades.:I think nothing superior to the semisextarius.
Στρεψιάδης:ἐγὼ μὲν οὐδὲν πρότερον ἡμιεκτέου.
Socrates.:You talk nonsense, man.Strepsiades.:Make a wager then with me, if the semisextarius be not a tetrameter.
Σωκράτης:οὐδὲν λέγεις ὦνθρωπε.Στρεψιάδης:περίδου νυν ἐμοί,εἰ μὴ τετράμετρόν ἐστιν ἡμιεκτέον.
Socrates.:Go to the devil! How boorish you are and dull of learning. Perhaps you may be able to learn about rhythms.
Σωκράτης:ἐς κόρακας, ὡς ἄγροικος εἶ καὶ δυσμαθής.ταχύ γʼ ἂν δύναιο μανθάνειν περὶ ῥυθμῶν.
Strepsiades.:But what good will rhythms do me for a living?
Στρεψιάδης:τί δέ μʼ ὠφελήσουσʼ οἱ ῥυθμοὶ πρὸς τἄλφιτα;
Socrates.:In the first place, to be clever at an entertainment, understanding what rhythm is for the war-dance, and what, again, according to the dactyle.
Σωκράτης:πρῶτον μὲν εἶναι κομψὸν ἐν συνουσίᾳ,ἐπαΐονθʼ ὁποῖός ἐστι τῶν ῥυθμῶνκατʼ ἐνόπλιον, χὠποῖος αὖ κατὰ δάκτυλον.
Strepsiades.:According to the dactyle? By Jove, but I know it!Socrates.:Tell me, pray.
Στρεψιάδης:κατὰ δάκτυλον; νὴ τὸν Δίʼ, ἀλλʼ οἶδʼ.Σωκράτης:εἰπὲ δή.
Strepsiades.:What else but this finger? Formerly, indeed, when I was yet a boy, this here!
Στρεψιάδης:τίς ἄλλος ἀντὶ τουτουὶ τοῦ δακτύλου;πρὸ τοῦ μέν, ἔτʼ ἐμοῦ παιδὸς ὄντος, οὑτοσί.
Socrates.:You are boorish and stupid.Strepsiades.:For I do not desire, you wretch, to learn any of these things.Socrates.:What then?
Σωκράτης:ἀγρεῖος εἶ καὶ σκαιός.Στρεψιάδης:οὐ γὰρ ᾠζυρὲτούτων ἐπιθυμῶ μανθάνειν οὐδέν.Σωκράτης:τί δαί;
Strepsiades.:That, that, the most unjust cause.
Στρεψιάδης:ἐκεῖνʼ ἐκεῖνο, τὸν ἀδικώτατον λόγον.
Socrates.:But you must learn other things before these; namely, what quadrupeds are properly masculine.
Σωκράτης:ἀλλʼ ἕτερα δεῖ σε πρότερα τούτου μανθάνειν,τῶν τετραπόδων ἅττʼ ἐστὶν ὀρθῶς ἄρρενα.
Strepsiades.:I know the males, if I am not mad:—κριὸς, τράγος, ταῦρος, κύων, ἀλεκτρυών.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ οἶδʼ ἔγωγε τἄρρενʼ, εἰ μὴ μαίνομαι·κριὸς τράγος ταῦρος κύων ἀλεκτρυών.
Socrates.:Do you see what you are doing? You are calling both the female and the male ἀλεκτρυὼν in the same way.
Σωκράτης:ὁρᾷς ὃ πάσχεις; τήν τε θήλειαν καλεῖςἀλεκτρυόνα κατὰ ταὐτὸ καὶ τὸν ἄρρενα.
Strepsiades.:How, pray? Come, tell me.Socrates.:How? The one with you is ἀλεκτρὺων, and the other is ἀλεκτρὺων also.
Στρεψιάδης:πῶς δὴ φέρʼ;Σωκράτης:ὅπως; ἀλεκτρυὼν κἀλεκτρυών.
Strepsiades.:Yea, by Neptune! How now ought I to call them?
Στρεψιάδης:νὴ τὸν Ποσειδῶ. νῦν δὲ πῶς με χρὴ καλεῖν;
Socrates.:The one ἀλεκτρύαινα and the other ἀλέκτωρ.
Σωκράτης:ἀλεκτρύαιναν, τὸν δʼ ἕτερον ἀλέκτορα.
Strepsiades.:Ἀλεκτρύαινα? Capital, by the Air! So that, in return for this lesson alone, I will fill your kardopos full of barley-meal on all sides.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλεκτρύαιναν; εὖ γε νὴ τὸν Ἀέρα·ὥστʼ ἀντὶ τούτου τοῦ διδάγματος μόνουδιαλφιτώσω σου κύκλῳ τὴν κάρδοπον.
Socrates.:See! See! There again is another blunder! You make κάρδοπος, which is feminine, to be masculine.Strepsiades.:In what way do I make κάρδοπος masculine?Socrates.:Most assuredly; just as if you were to say Κλεώνυμος.Strepsiades.:How pray? Tell me.
Σωκράτης:ἰδοὺ μάλʼ αὖθις τοῦθʼ ἕτερον· τὴν κάρδοπονἄρρενα καλεῖς θήλειαν οὖσαν.Στρεψιάδης:τῷ τρόπῳἄρρενα καλῶ ʼγὼ κάρδοπον;Σωκράτης:μάλιστά γε,ὥσπερ γε καὶ Κλεώνυμον.Στρεψιάδης:πῶς δή; φράσον.
Socrates.:Κάρδοπος with you is tantamount to Κλεώνυμος.
Σωκράτης:ταὐτὸν δύναταί σοι κάρδοπος Κλεωνύμῳ.
Strepsiades.:Good sir, Cleonymus had no kneading-trough, but kneaded his bread in a round mortar. How ought I to call it henceforth?Socrates.:How? Call it καρδόπη, as you call Σωστράτη.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ ὦγάθʼ οὐδʼ ἦν κάρδοπος Κλεωνύμῳ,ἀλλʼ ἐν θυείᾳ στρογγύλῃ γʼ ἂν ἐμάττετο.ἀτὰρ τὸ λοιπὸν πῶς με χρὴ καλεῖν;Σωκράτης:ὅπως;τὴν καρδόπην, ὥσπερ καλεῖς τὴν Σωστράτην.
Strepsiades.:Καρδόπη in the feminine?Socrates.:For so you speak it rightly.
Στρεψιάδης:τὴν καρδόπην θήλειαν;Σωκράτης:ὀρθῶς γὰρ λέγεις.
Strepsiades.:But that would make it καρδόπη, Κλεωνύμη.
Στρεψιάδης:ἐκεῖνο δʼ ἦν ἄν, καρδόπη, Κλεωνύμη.
Socrates.:You must learn one thing more about names, what are masculine and what of them are feminine.
Σωκράτης:ἔτι δή γε περὶ τῶν ὀνομάτων μαθεῖν σε δεῖ,ἅττʼ ἄρρενʼ ἐστίν, ἅττα δʼ αὐτῶν θήλεα.
Strepsiades.:I know what are female.Socrates.:Tell me, pray.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ οἶδʼ ἔγωγʼ ἃ θήλεʼ ἐστίν.Σωκράτης:εἰπὲ δή.
Strepsiades.:Lysilla, Philinna, Clitagora, Demetria.
Στρεψιάδης:Λύσιλλα Φίλιννα Κλειταγόρα Δημητρία.
Socrates.:What names are masculine?Strepsiades.:Thousands; Philoxenus, Melesias, Amynias.
Σωκράτης:ἄρρενα δὲ ποῖα τῶν ὀνομάτων;Στρεψιάδης:μυρία.Φιλόξενος Μελησίας Ἀμυνίας.
Socrates.:But, you wretch! These are not masculine.
Σωκράτης:ἀλλʼ ὦ πόνηρε ταῦτά γʼ ἐστʼ οὐκ ἄρρενα.
Strepsiades.:Are they not males with you?Socrates.:By no means; for how would you call Amynias, if you met him?
Στρεψιάδης:οὐκ ἄρρενʼ ὑμῖν ἐστιν;Σωκράτης:οὐδαμῶς γʼ, ἐπεὶπῶς ἂν καλέσειας ἐντυχὼν Ἀμυνίᾳ;
Strepsiades.:How would I call? Thus: “Come hither, come hither Amynia!”
Στρεψιάδης:ὅπως ἄν; ὡδί, δεῦρο δεῦρʼ Ἀμυνία.
Socrates.:Do you see? You call Amynias a woman.
Σωκράτης:ὁρᾷς; γυναῖκα τὴν Ἀμυνίαν καλεῖς.
Strepsiades.:Is it not then with justice, who does not serve in the army? But why should I learn these things, that we all know?
Στρεψιάδης:οὔκουν δικαίως ἥτις οὐ στρατεύεται;ἀτὰρ τί ταῦθʼ ἃ πάντες ἴσμεν μανθάνω;
Socrates.:It is no use, by Jupiter! Having reclined yourself down here-Strepsiades.:What must I do?
Σωκράτης:οὐδὲν μὰ Δίʼ ἀλλὰ κατακλινεὶς δευρὶ —Στρεψιάδης:τί δρῶ;
Socrates.:Think out some of your own affairs.
Σωκράτης:ἐκφρόντισόν τι τῶν σεαυτοῦ πραγμάτων.
Strepsiades.:Not here, pray, I beseech you; but, if I must, suffer me to excogitate these very things on the ground.
Στρεψιάδης:μὴ δῆθʼ ἱκετεύω σʼ ἐνγεταῦθʼ· ἀλλʼ εἴ γε χρή,χαμαί μʼ ἔασον αὐτὰ ταῦτʼ ἐκφροντίσαι.
Socrates.:There is no other way.Exit Socrates.Strepsiades.:Unfortunate man that I am! What a penalty shall I this day pay to the bugs!
Σωκράτης:οὐκ ἔστι παρὰ ταῦτʼ ἄλλα.Στρεψιάδης:κακοδαίμων ἐγώ,οἵαν δίκην τοῖς κόρεσι δώσω τήμερον.
Chorus.:Now meditate and examine closely; and roll yourself about in every way, having wrapped yourself up; and quickly, when you fall into a difficulty, spring to anothermental contrivance. But let delightful sleep be absent from your eyes.Strepsiades.:Attatai! Attatai!
Χορός:φρόντιζε δὴ καὶ διάθρει πάντα τρόπον τε σαυτὸνστρόβει πυκνώσας.ταχὺς δʼ, ὅταν εἰς ἄπορον πέσῃς,ἐπʼ ἄλλο πήδανόημα φρενός· ὕπνος δʼ ἀπέστω γλυκύθυμος ὀμμάτων.…Στρεψιάδης:ἀτταταῖ ἀτταταῖ.
Chorus.:What ails you? Why are you distressed?
Χορός:τί πάσχεις; τί κάμνεις;
Strepsiades.:Wretched man, I am perishing! The Corinthians, coming out from the bed, are biting me, and devouring my sides, and drinking up my life-blood, and tearing away my flesh, and digging through my vitals, and will annihilate me.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀπόλλυμαι δείλαιος· ἐκ τοῦ σκίμποδοςδάκνουσί μʼ ἐξέρποντες οἱ Κορίνθιοι,καὶ τὰς πλευρὰς δαρδάπτουσινκαὶ τὴν ψυχὴν ἐκπίνουσινκαὶ τοὺς ὄρχεις ἐξέλκουσινκαὶ τὸν πρωκτὸν διορύττουσιν,καί μʼ ἀπολοῦσιν.
Chorus.:Do not now be very grievously distressed.
Χορός:μή νυν βαρέως ἄλγει λίαν.
Strepsiades.:Why, how, when my money is gone, my complexion gone, my life gone, and my slipper gone?
Στρεψιάδης:καὶ πῶς; ὅτε μουφροῦδα τὰ χρήματα, φρούδη χροιά,φρούδη ψυχή, φρούδη δʼ ἐμβάς·
And furthermore in addition to these evils, with singing the night-watches, I am almost gone myself.Re-enter Socrates.
καὶ πρὸς τούτοις ἔτι τοῖσι κακοῖςφρουρᾶς ᾄδωνὀλίγου φροῦδος γεγένημαι.
Socrates.:Ho you! What are you about? Are you not meditating?Strepsiades.:I? Yea, by Neptune!Socrates.:And what, pray, have you thought?
Σωκράτης:οὗτος τί ποιεῖς; οὐχὶ φροντίζεις;Στρεψιάδης:ἐγώ;νὴ τὸν Ποσειδῶ.Σωκράτης:καὶ τί δῆτʼ ἐφρόντισας;
Strepsiades.:Whether any bit of me will be left by the bugs.
Στρεψιάδης:ὑπὸ τῶν κόρεων εἴ μού τι περιλειφθήσεται.
Socrates.:You will perish most wretchedly.Strepsiades.:But, my good friend, I have already perished.
Σωκράτης:ἀπολεῖ κάκιστʼ.Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ ὦγάθʼ ἀπόλωλʼ ἀρτίως.
Socrates.:You must not give in, but must wrap yourself up; for you have to discover a device for abstracting, and a means of cheating.Walks up and down while Strepsiades wraps himself up in the blankets.Strepsiades.:Ah me! Would, pray, some one would throw over me a swindling contrivance from the sheep-skins.
Σωκράτης:οὐ μαλθακιστέʼ ἀλλὰ περικαλυπτέα.ἐξευρετέος γὰρ νοῦς ἀποστερητικὸςκἀπαιόλημʼ.Στρεψιάδης:οἴμοι τίς ἂν δῆτʼ ἐπιβάλοιἐξ ἀρνακίδων γνώμην ἀποστερητρίδα;
Socrates.:Come now; I will first see this fellow, what he is about. Ho you! Are you asleep?Strepsiades.:No, by Apollo, I am not!
Σωκράτης:φέρε νυν ἀθρήσω πρῶτον ὅ τι δρᾷ τουτονί.οὗτος καθεύδεις;Στρεψιάδης:μὰ τὸν Ἀπόλλω ʼγὼ μὲν οὔ.
Socrates.:Have you got anything?Strepsiades.:No; by Jupiter, certainly not!Socrates.:Nothing at all?
Σωκράτης:ἔχεις τι;Στρεψιάδης:μὰ Δίʼ οὐ δῆτʼ ἔγωγʼ.Σωκράτης:οὐδὲν πάνυ;
Strepsiades.:Nothing, except what I have in my right hand.
Στρεψιάδης:οὐδέν γε πλὴν ἢ τὸ πέος ἐν τῇ δεξιᾷ.
Socrates.:Will you not quickly cover yourself up and think of something?
Σωκράτης:οὐκ ἐγκαλυψάμενος ταχέως τι φροντιεῖς;
Strepsiades.:About what? For do you tell me this, O Socrates!
Στρεψιάδης:περὶ τοῦ; σὺ γάρ μοι τοῦτο φράσον ὦ Σώκρατες.
Socrates.:Do you, yourself, first find out and state what you wish.
Σωκράτης:αὐτὸς ὅ τι βούλει πρῶτος ἐξευρὼν λέγε.
Strepsiades.:You have heard a thousand times what I wish. About the interest; so that I may pay no one.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀκήκοας μυριάκις ἁγὼ βούλομαι,περὶ τῶν τόκων, ὅπως ἂν ἀποδῶ μηδενί.
Socrates.:Come then, wrap yourself up, and having given your mind play with subtilty, revolve your affairs by little and little, rightly distinguishing and examining.Strepsiades.:Ah me, unhappy man!
Σωκράτης:ἴθι νῦν καλύπτου καὶ σχάσας τὴν φροντίδαλεπτὴν κατὰ μικρὸν περιφρόνει τὰ πράγματα,ὀρθῶς διαιρῶν καὶ σκοπῶν.Στρεψιάδης:οἴμοι τάλας.
Socrates.:Keep quiet; and if you be puzzled in any one of your conceptions, leave it and go; and then set your mind in motion again, and lock it up.
Σωκράτης:ἔχʼ ἀτρέμα· κἂν ἀπορῇς τι τῶν νοημάτων,ἀφεὶς ἄπελθε, [καὶ] κατὰ τὴν γνώμην πάλινκίνησον αὖθις αὐτὸ καὶ ζυγώθρισον.
Strepsiades.:(in great glee). O dearest little Socrates!Socrates.:What, old man?
Στρεψιάδης:ὦ Σωκρατίδιον φίλτατον.Σωκράτης:τί ὦ γέρον;
Strepsiades.:I have got a device for cheating them of the interest.
Στρεψιάδης:ἔχω τόκου γνώμην ἀποστερητικήν.
Socrates.:Exhibit it.Strepsiades.:Now tell me this—Socrates.:Pray?
Σωκράτης:ἐπίδειξον αὐτήν.Στρεψιάδης:εἰπὲ δή νύν μοι —Σωκράτης:τὸ τί;
Strepsiades.:If I were to purchase a Thessalian witch,and draw down the moon by night, and then shut it up, as if it were a mirror, in a round crest-case, and then carefully keep it—Socrates.:What good, pray, would this do you?Strepsiades.:What? If the moon were to rise no longer anywhere, I should not pay the interest.Socrates.:Why so, pray?
Στρεψιάδης:γυναῖκα φαρμακίδʼ εἰ πριάμενος Θετταλὴνκαθέλοιμι νύκτωρ τὴν σελήνην, εἶτα δὴαὐτὴν καθείρξαιμʼ ἐς λοφεῖον στρογγύλον,ὥσπερ κάτοπτρον, κᾆτα τηροίην ἔχων —Σωκράτης:τί δῆτα τοῦτʼ ἂν ὠφελήσειέν σʼ;Στρεψιάδης:ὅ τι;εἰ μηκέτʼ ἀνατέλλοι σελήνη μηδαμοῦ,οὐκ ἂν ἀποδοίην τοὺς τόκους.Σωκράτης:ὁτιὴ τί δή;
Strepsiades.:Because the money is lent out by the month.
Στρεψιάδης:ὁτιὴ κατὰ μῆνα τἀγύριον δανείζεται.
Socrates.:Capital! But I will again propose to you another clever question. If a suit of five talents should be entered against you, tell me how you would obliterate it.
Σωκράτης:εὖ γʼ· ἀλλʼ ἕτερον αὖ σοι προβαλῶ τι δεξιόν.εἴ σοι γράφοιτο πεντετάλαντός τις δίκη,ὅπως ἂν αὐτὴν ἀφανίσειας εἰπέ μοι.
Strepsiades.:How? How? I do not know but I must seek.
Στρεψιάδης:ὅπως; ὅπως; οὐκ οἶδʼ· ἀτὰρ ζητητέον.
Socrates.:Do not then always revolve your thoughts about yourself; but slack away your mind into the air, like a cock-chafer tied with a thread by the foot.
Σωκράτης:μή νυν περὶ σαυτὸν εἶλλε τὴν γνώμην ἀεί,ἀλλʼ ἀποχάλα τὴν φροντίδʼ ἐς τὸν ἀέραλινόδετον ὥσπερ μηλολόνθην τοῦ ποδός.
Strepsiades.:I have found a very clever method of getting rid of my suit, so that you yourself would acknowledge it.Socrates.:Of what description?
Στρεψιάδης:ηὕρηκʼ ἀφάνισιν τῆς δίκης σοφωτάτην,ὥστʼ αὐτὸν ὁμολογεῖν σʼ ἐμοί.Σωκράτης:ποίαν τινά;
Strepsiades.:Have you ever seen this stone in the chemist’s shops, the beautiful and transparent one, from which they kindle fire?Socrates.:Do you mean the burning-glass?
Στρεψιάδης:ἤδη παρὰ τοῖσι φαρμακοπώλαις τὴν λίθονταύτην ἑόρακας τὴν καλήν, τὴν διαφανῆ,ἀφʼ ἧς τὸ πῦρ ἅπτουσι;Σωκράτης:τὴν ὕαλον λέγεις;
Strepsiades.:I do. Come what would you say, pray, if I were to take this, when the clerk was entering the suit, and were to stand at a distance, in the direction of the sun, thus, and melt out the letters of my suit?
Στρεψιάδης:ἔγωγε. φέρε τί δῆτʼ ἄν, εἰ ταύτην λαβών,ὁπότε γράφοιτο τὴν δίκην ὁ γραμματεύς,ἀπωτέρω στὰς ὧδε πρὸς τὸν ἥλιοντὰ γράμματʼ ἐκτήξαιμι τῆς ἐμῆς δίκης;
Socrates.:Cleverly done, by the Graces!Strepsiades.:Oh! How I am delighted, that a suit of five talents has been cancelled!
Σωκράτης:σοφῶς γε νὴ τὰς Χάριτας.Στρεψιάδης:οἴμʼ ὡς ἥδομαιὅτι πεντετάλαντος διαγέγραπταί μοι δίκη.
Socrates.:Come now, quickly seize upon this.Strepsiades.:What?
Σωκράτης:ἄγε δὴ ταχέως τουτὶ ξυνάρπασον.Στρεψιάδης:τὸ τί;
Socrates.:How, when engaged in a lawsuit, you could overturn the suit, when you were about to be cast, because you had no witnesses.
Σωκράτης:ὅπως ἀποστρέψαιʼ ἂν ἀντιδικῶν δίκηνμέλλων ὀφλήσειν μὴ παρόντων μαρτύρων.
Strepsiades.:Most readily and easily.Socrates.:Tell me, pray.Strepsiades.:Well now, I’ll tell you. If, while one suit was still pending, before mine was called on, I were to run away and hang myself.
Στρεψιάδης:φαυλότατα καὶ ῥᾷστʼ.Σωκράτης:εἰπὲ δή.Στρεψιάδης:καὶ δὴ λέγω.εἰ πρόσθεν ἔτι μιᾶς ἐνεστώσης δίκης,πρὶν τὴν ἐμὴν καλεῖσθʼ, ἀπαγξαίμην τρέχων.
Socrates.:You talk nonsense.Strepsiades.:By the gods, would I! For no one will bring action against me when I am dead.
Σωκράτης:οὐδὲν λέγεις.Στρεψιάδης:νὴ τοὺς θεοὺς ἔγωγʼ, ἐπεὶοὐδεὶς κατʼ ἐμοῦ τεθνεῶτος εἰσάξει δίκην.
Socrates.:You talk nonsense. Begone; I can’t teach you any longer.
Σωκράτης:ὑθλεῖς· ἄπερρʼ, οὐκ ἂν διδάξαιμʼ ἄν σʼ ἔτι.
Strepsiades.:Why so? Yea, by the gods, O Socrates!
Στρεψιάδης:ὁτιὴ τί; ναὶ πρὸς τῶν θεῶν ὦ Σώκρατες.
Socrates.:You straightaway forget whatever you learn. For what now was the first thing you were taught? Tell me.
Σωκράτης:ἀλλʼ εὐθὺς ἐπιλήθει σύ γʼ ἅττʼ ἂν καὶ μάθῃς·ἐπεὶ τί νυνὶ πρῶτον ἐδιδάχθης; λέγε.
Strepsiades.:Come, let me see: nay, what was the first? What was the fist? Nay, what was the thing in which we knead our flour? Ah me! What was it?Socrates.:Will you not pack off to the devil, you most forgetful and most stupid old man?
Στρεψιάδης:φέρʼ ἴδω τί μέντοι πρῶτον ἦν; τί πρῶτον ἦν;τίς ἦν ἐν ᾗ ʼματτόμεθα μέντοι τἄλφιτα;οἴμοι τίς ἦν;Σωκράτης:οὐκ ἐς κόρακας ἀποφθερεῖ,ἐπιλησμότατον καὶ σκαιότατον γερόντιον;
Strepsiades.:Ah me, what then, pray will become of me, wretched man? For I shall be utterly undone, if I do not learn to ply the tongue. Come, O ye Clouds, give me some good advice.
Στρεψιάδης:οἴμοι τί οὖν δῆθʼ ὁ κακοδαίμων πείσομαι;ἀπὸ γὰρ ὀλοῦμαι μὴ μαθὼν γλωττοστροφεῖν.ἀλλʼ ὦ Νεφέλαι χρηστόν τι συμβουλεύσατε.
Chorus.:We, old man, advise you, if you have a son grown up, to send him to learn in your stead.
Χορός:ἡμεῖς μὲν ὦ πρεσβῦτα συμβουλεύομεν,εἴ σοί τις υἱός ἐστιν ἐκτεθραμμένος,πέμπειν ἐκεῖνον ἀντὶ σαυτοῦ μανθάνειν.
Strepsiades.:Well, I have a fine, handsome son, but he is not willing to learn. What must I do?
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ ἔστʼ ἔμοιγʼ υἱὸς καλός τε κἀγαθός·ἀλλʼ οὐκ ἐθέλει γὰρ μανθάνειν. τί ἐγὼ πάθω;
Chorus.:But do you permit him?Strepsiades.:Yes, for he is robust in body, and in good health, and is come of the high-plumed dames of Coesyra. I will go for him, and if he be not willing, I will certainly drive him from my house. To Socrates. Go in and wait for me a short time.Exit.
Χορός:σὺ δʼ ἐπιτρέπεις;Στρεψιάδης:εὐσωματεῖ γὰρ καὶ σφριγᾷ,κἄστʼ ἐκ γυναικῶν εὐπτέρων τῶν Κοισύρας.ἀτὰρ μέτειμί γʼ αὐτόν· ἢν δὲ μὴ ʼθέλῃ,οὐκ ἔσθʼ ὅπως οὐκ ἐξελῶ κʼ τῆς οἰκίας.ἀλλʼ ἐπανάμεινόν μʼ ὀλίγον εἰσελθὼν χρόνον.
Chorus.:Do you perceive that you are soon to obtain the greatest benefits through us alone of the gods? For this man is ready to do everything that you bid him.
Χορός:ἆρʼ αἰσθάνει πλεῖστα διʼ ἡμᾶς ἀγάθʼ αὐτίχʼ ἕξωνμόνας θεῶν; ὡςἕτοιμος ὅδʼ ἐστὶν ἅπαντα δρᾶνὅσʼ ἂν κελεύῃς.
But you, while the man is astounded and evidently elated, having perceived it, will quickly fleece him to the best of your power. Exit Socrates. For matters of this sort are somehow accustomed to turn the other way.Enter Strepsiades and Phidippides.
σὺ δʼ ἀνδρὸς ἐκπεπληγμένου καὶ φανερῶς ἐπηρμένουγνοὺς ἀπολάψεις ὅ τι πλεῖστον δύνασαι,ταχέως· φιλεῖ γάρ πως τὰ τοιαῦθʼ ἑτέρᾳ τρέπεσθαι.
Strepsiades.:By Mist, you certainly shall not stay here any longer! But go and gnaw the columns of Megacles.
Στρεψιάδης:οὔτοι μὰ τὴν Ὁμίχλην ἔτʼ ἐνταυθοῖ μενεῖς·ἀλλʼ ἔσθιʼ ἐλθὼν τοὺς Μεγακλέους κίονας.
Phidippides.:My good sir, what is the matter with you, O father? You are not in your senses, by Olympian Jupiter!
Φειδιππίδης:ὦ δαιμόνιε, τί χρῆμα πάσχεις ὦ πάτερ;οὐκ εὖ φρονεῖς μὰ τὸν Δία τὸν Ὀλύμπιον.
Strepsiades.:See, see, “Olympian Jupiter!” What folly! To think of your believing in Jupiter, as old as you are!
Στρεψιάδης:ἰδού γʼ ἰδού, Δίʼ Ὀλύμπιον· τῆς μωρίας,τὸν Δία νομίζειν ὄντα τηλικουτονί.
Phidippides.:Why, pray, did you laugh at this?Strepsiades.:Reflecting that you are a child, and have antiquated notions. Yet, however, approach, that you may know more; and I will tell you a thing, by learning which you will be a man. But see that you do not teach this to any one.
Φειδιππίδης:τί δὲ τοῦτʼ ἐγέλασας ἐτεόν;Στρεψιάδης:ἐνθυμούμενοςὅτι παιδάριον εἶ καὶ φρονεῖς ἀρχαιϊκά.ὅμως γε μὴν πρόσελθʼ, ἵνʼ εἰδῇς πλείονα,καί σοι φράσω τι πρᾶγμʼ ὃ μαθὼν ἀνὴρ ἔσει.ὅπως δὲ τοῦτο μὴ διδάξεις μηδένα.
Phidippides.:Well, what is it?Strepsiades.:You swore now by Jupiter.
Φειδιππίδης:ἰδού· τί ἔστιν;Στρεψιάδης:ὤμοσας νυνὶ Δία.
Phidippides.:I did.Strepsiades.:Seest thou, then, how good a thing is learning? There is no Jupiter, O Phidippides!Phidippides.:Who then?
Φειδιππίδης:ἔγωγʼ.Στρεψιάδης:ὁρᾷς οὖν ὡς ἀγαθὸν τὸ μανθάνειν;οὐκ ἔστιν ὦ Φειδιππίδη Ζεύς.Φειδιππίδης:ἀλλὰ τίς;
Strepsiades.:Vortex reigns, having expelled Jupiter.
Στρεψιάδης:Δῖνος βασιλεύει τὸν Δίʼ ἐξεληλακώς.
Phidippides.:Bah! Why do you talk foolishly?Strepsiades.:Be assured that it is so.
Φειδιππίδης:αἰβοῖ τί ληρεῖς;Στρεψιάδης:ἴσθι τοῦθʼ οὕτως ἔχον.
Phidippides.:Who says this?Strepsiades.:Socrates the Melian, and Chaerephon, who knows the footmarks of fleas.
Φειδιππίδης:τίς φησι ταῦτα;Στρεψιάδης:Σωκράτης ὁ Μήλιοςκαὶ Χαιρεφῶν, ὃς οἶδε τὰ ψυλλῶν ἴχνη.
Phidippides.:Have you arrived at such a pitch of frenzy that you believe madmen?Strepsiades.:Speak words of good omen, and say nothing bad of clever menand wise; of whom, through frugality, none ever shaved or anointed himself, or went to a bath to wash himself; while you squander my property in bathing, as if I were already dead. But go as quickly as possible and learn instead of me.
Φειδιππίδης:σὺ δʼ ἐς τοσοῦτον τῶν μανιῶν ἐλήλυθαςὥστʼ ἀνδράσιν πείθει χολῶσιν;Στρεψιάδης:εὐστόμεικαὶ μηδὲν εἴπῃς φλαῦρον ἄνδρας δεξιοὺςκαὶ νοῦν ἔχοντας· ὧν ὑπὸ τῆς φειδωλίαςἀπεκείρατʼ οὐδεὶς πώποτʼ οὐδʼ ἠλείψατο,οὐδʼ ἐς βαλανεῖον ἦλθε λουσόμενος· σὺ δὲὥσπερ τεθνεῶτος καταλόει μου τὸν βίον.ἀλλʼ ὡς τάχιστʼ ἐλθὼν ὑπὲρ ἐμοῦ μάνθανε.
Phidippides.:What good could any one learn from them?
Φειδιππίδης:τί δʼ ἂν παρʼ ἐκείνων καὶ μάθοι χρηστόν τις ἄν;
Strepsiades.:What, really? Whatever wisdom there is among men. And you will know yourself, how ignorant and stupid you are. But wait for me here a short time.Runs off.
Στρεψιάδης:ἄληθες; ὅσαπερ ἔστʼ ἐν ἀνθρώποις σοφά·γνώσει δὲ σαυτὸν ὡς ἀμαθὴς εἶ καὶ παχύς.ἀλλʼ ἐπανάμεινόν μʼ ὀλίγον ἐνταυθοῖ χρόνον.
Phidippides.:Ah me! What shall I do, my father being crazed? Shall I bring him into court and convict him of lunacy, or shall I give information of his madness to the coffin-makers?Re-enter Strepsiades with a cock under one arm and a hen under the other.
Φειδιππίδης:οἴμοι τί δράσω παραφρονοῦντος τοῦ πατρός;πότερον παρανοίας αὐτὸν εἰσαγαγὼν ἕλω,ἢ τοῖς σοροπηγοῖς τὴν μανίαν αὐτοῦ φράσω;
Strepsiades.:Come, let me see; what do you consider this to be? Tell me.
Στρεψιάδης:φέρʼ ἴδω, σὺ τοῦτον τί ὀνομάζεις; εἰπέ μοι.
Phidippides.:Alectryon.Strepsiades.:Right. And what this?
Φειδιππίδης:ἀλεκτρυόνα.Στρεψιάδης:καλῶς γε. ταυτηνὶ δὲ τί;
Phidippides.:Alectryon.Strepsiades.:Both the same? You are very ridiculous. Do not do so, then, for the future; but call this ἀλεκτρύαινα, and this one ἀλέκτωρ.
Φειδιππίδης:ἀλεκτρυόνʼ.Στρεψιάδης:ἄμφω ταὐτό; καταγέλαστος εἶ.μή νυν τὸ λοιπόν, ἀλλὰ τήνδε μὲν καλεῖνἀλεκτρύαιναν τουτονὶ δʼ ἀλέκτορα.
Phidippides.:Ἀλεκτρύαινα! Did you learn these clever things by going in just now to the Titans?
Φειδιππίδης:ἀλεκτρύαιναν; ταῦτʼ ἔμαθες τὰ δεξιὰεἴσω παρελθὼν ἄρτι παρὰ τοὺς γηγενεῖς;
Strepsiades.:And many others too; but whatever I learned on each occasion I used to forget immediately, through length of years.
Στρεψιάδης:χἄτερά γε πόλλʼ· ἀλλʼ ὅ τι μάθοιμʼ ἑκάστοτε,ἐπελανθανόμην ἂν εὐθὺς ὑπὸ πλήθους ἐτῶν.
Phidippides.:Is it for this reason, pray, that you have also lost your cloak?
Φειδιππίδης:διὰ ταῦτα δὴ καὶ θοἰμάτιον ἀπώλεσας;
Strepsiades.:I have not lost it; but have studied it away.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀλλʼ οὐκ ἀπολώλεκʼ, ἀλλὰ καταπεφρόντικα.
Phidippides.:What have you made of your slippers, you foolish man?
Φειδιππίδης:τὰς δʼ ἐμβάδας ποῖ τέτροφας ὦνόητε σύ;
Strepsiades.:I have expended them, like Pericles, for needful purposes.
Στρεψιάδης:ὥσπερ Περικλέης ἐς τὸ δέον ἀπώλεσα.
Come, move, let us go. And then if you obey your father, go wrong if you like. I also know that I formerly obeyed you, a lisping child of six years old, and bought you a go-cart at the Diasia, with the first obolus I received from the Heliaea.
ἀλλʼ ἴθι βάδιζʼ, ἴωμεν· εἶτα τῷ πατρὶπιθόμενος ἐξάμαρτε· κἀγώ τοί ποτε,οἶδʼ, ἑξέτει σοι τραυλίσαντι πιθόμενος,ὃν πρῶτον ὀβολὸν ἔλαβον ἡλιαστικόν,τούτου ʼπριάμην σοι Διασίοις ἁμαξίδα.
Phidippides.:You will assuredly some time at length be grieved at this.
Φειδιππίδης:ἦ μὴν σὺ τούτοις τῷ χρόνῳ ποτʼ ἀχθέσει.
Strepsiades.:It is well done of you that you obeyed. Come hither, come hither O Socrates! Come forth, for I bring to you this son of mine, having persuaded him against his will.Enter Socrates.Socrates.:For he is still childish, and not used to the baskets here.
Στρεψιάδης:εὖ γʼ ὅτι ἐπείσθης. δεῦρο δεῦρʼ ὦ Σώκρατες,ἔξελθʼ· ἄγω γάρ σοι τὸν υἱὸν τουτονὶἄκοντʼ ἀναπείσας.Σωκράτης:νηπύτιος γάρ ἐστʼ ἔτι,καὶ τῶν κρεμαθρῶν οὔπω τρίβων τῶν ἐνθάδε.
Phidippides.:You would yourself be used to them if you were hanged.
Φειδιππίδης:αὐτὸς τρίβων εἴης ἄν, εἰ κρέμαιό γε.
Strepsiades.:A mischief take you! Do you abuse your teacher?
Στρεψιάδης:οὐκ ἐς κόρακας; καταρᾷ σὺ τῷ διδασκάλῳ;
Socrates.:“Were hanged” quoth’a! How sillily he pronounced it, and with lips wide apart! How can this youth ever learn an acquittal from a trialor a legal summons, or persuasive refutation? And yet Hyperbolus learned this at the cost of a talent.
Σωκράτης:ἰδοὺ κρέμαιʼ, ὡς ἠλίθιον ἐφθέγξατοκαὶ τοῖσι χείλεσιν διερρυηκόσιν.πῶς ἂν μάθοι ποθʼ οὗτος ἀπόφυξιν δίκηςἢ κλῆσιν ἢ χαύνωσιν ἀναπειστηρίαν;καίτοι γε ταλάντου τοῦτʼ ἔμαθεν Ὑπέρβολος.
Strepsiades.:Never mind; teach him. He is clever by nature. Indeed, from his earliest years, when he was a little fellow only so big, he was wont to form houses and carve ships within-doors,and make little wagons of leather, and make frogs out of pomegranate-rinds, you can’t think how cleverly. But see that he learns those two causes; the better, whatever it may be; and the worse, which, by maintaining what is unjust, overturns the better.
Στρεψιάδης:ἀμέλει δίδασκε· θυμόσοφός ἐστιν φύσει·εὐθύς γέ τοι παιδάριον ὄν τυννουτονὶἔπλαττεν ἔνδον οἰκίας ναῦς τʼ ἔγλυφεν,ἁμαξίδας τε σκυτίνας ἠργάζετο,κἀκ τῶν σιδίων βατράχους ἐποίει πῶς δοκεῖς.ὅπως δʼ ἐκείνω τὼ λόγω μαθήσεται,τὸν κρείττονʼ ὅστις ἐστὶ καὶ τὸν ἥττονα,ὃς τἄδικα λέγων ἀνατρέπει τὸν κρείττονα·
If not both, at any rate the unjust one by all means.
ἐὰν δὲ μή, τὸν γοῦν ἄδικον πάσῃ τέχνῃ.
Socrates.:He shall learn it himself from the two causes in person.Exit Socrates.Strepsiades.:I will take my departure. Remember this now, that he is to be able to reply to all just arguments.Exit Strepsiades and enter Just Cause and Unjust Cause.Just Cause.:Come hither! Show yourself to the spectators, although being audacious.
Σωκράτης:αὐτὸς μαθήσεται παρʼ αὐτοῖν τοῖν λόγοιν.ἐγὼ δʼ ἀπέσομαι.Στρεψιάδης:τοῦτό νυν μέμνησʼ, ὅπωςπρὸς πάντα τὰ δίκαιʼ ἀντιλέγειν δυνήσεται.Χορός:…Δίκαιος Λόγος:χώρει δευρί, δεῖξον σαυτὸντοῖσι θεαταῖς, καίπερ θρασὺς ὤν.
Unjust Cause.:Go whither you please; for I shall far rather do for you, if I speak before a crowd.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:ἴθʼ ὅποι χρῄζεις. πολὺ γὰρ μᾶλλόν ʼςἐν τοῖς πολλοῖσι λέγων ἀπολῶ.
Just Cause.:You destroy me? Who are you?Unjust Cause.:A cause.Just Cause.:Ay, the worse.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:ἀπολεῖς σύ; τίς ὤν;Ἄδικος Λόγος:λόγος.Δίκαιος Λόγος:ἥττων γʼ ὤν.
Unjust Cause.:But I conquer you, who say that you are better than I.Just Cause.:By doing what clever trick?
Ἄδικος Λόγος:ἀλλά σε νικῶ τὸν ἐμοῦ κρείττωφάσκοντʼ εἶναι.Δίκαιος Λόγος:τί σοφὸν ποιῶν;
Unjust Cause.:By discovering new contrivances.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:γνώμας καινὰς ἐξευρίσκων.
Just Cause.:For these innovations flourish by the favour of these silly persons.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:ταῦτα γὰρ ἀνθεῖ διὰ τουτουσὶτοὺς ἀνοήτους.
Unjust Cause.:No; but wise persons.Just Cause.:I will destroy you miserably.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:οὔκ, ἀλλὰ σοφούς.Δίκαιος Λόγος:ἀπολῶ σε κακῶς.
Unjust Cause.:Tell me, by doing what?Just Cause.:By speaking what is just.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:εἰπὲ τί ποιῶν;Δίκαιος Λόγος:τὰ δίκαια λέγων.
Unjust Cause.:But I will overturn them by contradicting them; for I deny that justice even exists at all.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:ἀλλʼ ἀνατρέψω γʼ αὔτʼ ἀντιλέγων·οὐδὲ γὰρ εἶναι πάνυ φημὶ δίκην.
Just Cause.:Do you deny that it exists?Unjust Cause.:For come, where is it?
Δίκαιος Λόγος:οὐκ εἶναι φῄς;Ἄδικος Λόγος:φέρε γὰρ ποῦ ʼστιν;
Just Cause.:With the gods.Unjust Cause.:How, then, if justice exists, has Jupiter not perished, who bound his own father?Just Cause.:Bah! This profanity now is spreading! Give me a basin.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:παρὰ τοῖσι θεοῖς.Ἄδικος Λόγος:πῶς δῆτα δίκης οὔσης ὁ Ζεὺςοὐκ ἀπόλωλεν τὸν πατέρʼ αὑτοῦδήσας;Δίκαιος Λόγος:αἰβοῖ τουτὶ καὶ δὴχωρεῖ τὸ κακόν· δότε μοι λεκάνην.
Unjust Cause.:You are a dotard and absurd.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:τυφογέρων εἶ κἀνάρμοστος.
Just Cause.:You are debauched and shameless.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:καταπύγων εἶ κἀναίσχυντος.
Unjust Cause.:You have spoken roses of me.Just Cause.:And a dirty lickspittle.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:ῥόδα μʼ εἴρηκας.Δίκαιος Λόγος:καὶ βωμολόχος.
Unjust Cause.:You crown me with lilies.Just Cause.:And a parricide.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:κρίνεσι στεφανοῖς.Δίκαιος Λόγος:καὶ πατραλοίας.
Unjust Cause.:You don’t know that you are sprinkling me with gold.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:χρυσῷ πάττων μʼ οὐ γιγνώσκεις.
Just Cause.:Certainly not so formerly, but with lead.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:οὐ δῆτα πρὸ τοῦ γʼ, ἀλλὰ μολύβδῳ.
Unjust Cause.:But now this is an ornament to me.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:νῦν δέ γε κόσμος τοῦτʼ ἐστὶν ἐμοί.
Just Cause.:You are very impudent.Unjust Cause.:And you are antiquated.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:θρασὺς εἶ πολλοῦ.Ἄδικος Λόγος:σὺ δέ γʼ ἀρχαῖος.
Just Cause.:And through you, no one of our youths is willing to go to school; and you will be found out some time or other by the Athenians, what sort of doctrines you teach the simple-minded.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:διὰ σὲ δὲ φοιτᾶνοὐδεὶς ἐθέλει τῶν μειρακίων·καὶ γνωσθήσει ποτʼ Ἀθηναίοιςοἶα διδάσκεις τοὺς ἀνοήτους.
Unjust Cause.:You are shamefully squalid.Just Cause.:And you are prosperous. And yet formerly you were a beggar saying that you were the Mysian Telephus, and gnawing the maxims of Pandeletus out of your little wallet.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:αὐχμεῖς αἰσχρῶς.Δίκαιος Λόγος:σὺ δέ γʼ εὖ πράττεις.καίτοι πρότερόν γʼ ἐπτώχευες,Τήλεφος εἶναι Μυσὸς φάσκων,ἐκ πηριδίουγνώμας τρώγων Πανδελετείους.
Unjust Cause.:Oh, the wisdom—Just Cause.:Oh, the madness—Unjust Cause.:Which you have mentioned.Just Cause.:And of your city, which supports you who ruin her youths.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:ὤμοι σοφίας —Δίκαιος Λόγος:ὤμοι μανίας —Ἄδικος Λόγος:ἧς ἐμνήσθης —Δίκαιος Λόγος:τῆς σῆς, πόλεώς θʼ ἥτις σε τρέφειλυμαινόμενον τοῖς μειρακίοις.
Unjust Cause.:You shan’t teach this youth, you old dotard.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:οὐχὶ διδάξεις τοῦτον Κρόνος ὤν.
Just Cause.:Yes, if he is to be saved, and not merely to practise loquacity.Unjust Cause.: (to Phidippides).
Δίκαιος Λόγος:εἴπερ γʼ αὐτὸν σωθῆναι χρὴκαὶ μὴ λαλιὰν μόνον ἀσκῆσαι.
Come hither, and leave him to rave.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:δεῦρʼ ἴθι, τοῦτον δʼ ἔα μαίνεσθαι.
Just Cause.:You shall howl, if you lay your hand on him.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:κλαύσει, τὴν χεῖρʼ ἢν ἐπιβάλλῃς.
Chorus.:Cease from contention and railing.
Χορός:παύσασθε μάχης καὶ λοιδορίας.
But show to us, you, what you used to teach the men of former times, and you, the new system of education; in order that, having heard you disputing, he may decide and go to the school of one or the other.
ἀλλʼ ἐπίδειξαι σύ τε τοὺς προτέρουςἅττʼ ἐδίδασκες, σύ τε τὴν καινὴνπαίδευσιν, ὅπως ἂν ἀκούσας σφῷνἀντιλεγόντοιν κρίνας φοιτᾷ.
Just Cause.:I am willing to do so.Unjust Cause.:I also am willing.
Δίκαιος Λόγος:δρᾶν ταῦτʼ ἐθέλω.Ἄδικος Λόγος:κἄγωγʼ ἐθέλω.
Chorus.:Come now, which of the two shall speak first?
Χορός:φέρε δὴ πότερος λέξει πρότερος;
Unjust Cause.:I will give him the precedence; and then, from these things which he adduces, I will shoot him dead with new words and thoughts.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:τούτῳ δώσω·κᾆτʼ ἐκ τούτων ὧν ἂν λέξῃῥηματίοισιν καινοῖς αὐτὸνκαὶ διανοίαις κατατοξεύσω.
And at last, if he mutter, he shall be destroyed, being stung in his whole face and his two eyes by my maxims, as if by bees.
τὸ τελευταῖον δʼ, ἢν ἀναγρύζῃ,τὸ πρόσωπον ἅπαν καὶ τὠφθαλμὼκεντούμενος ὥσπερ ὑπʼ ἀνθρηνῶνὑπὸ τῶν γνωμῶν ἀπολεῖται.
Chorus.:Now the two, relying on very dexterous arguments and thoughts, and sententious maxims, will show which of them shall appear superior in argument.
Χορός:νῦν δείξετον τὼ πισύνω τοῖς περιδεξίοισιλόγοισι καὶ φροντίσι καὶ γνωμοτύποις μερίμναις,ὁπότερος αὐτοῖν λέγων ἀμείνων φανήσεται.
For now the whole crisis of wisdom is here laid before them; about which my friends have a very great contest.
νῦν γὰρ ἅπας ἐνθάδε κίνδυνος ἀνεῖται σοφίας,ἧς πέρι τοῖς ἐμοῖς φίλοις ἐστὶν ἀγὼν μέγιστος.
Chorus.:But do you, who adorned our elders with many virtuous manners, utter the voice in which you rejoice, and declare your nature.
Χορός:ἀλλʼ ὦ πολλοῖς τοὺς πρεσβυτέρους ἤθεσι χρηστοῖς στεφανώσας,ῥῆξον φωνὴν ᾗτινι χαίρεις, καὶ τὴν σαυτοῦ φύσιν εἰπέ.
Just Cause.:I will, therefore, describe the ancient system of education, how it was ordered, when I flourished in the advocacy of justice, and temperance was the fashion. In the first place it was incumbent that no one should hear the voice of a boy uttering a syllable; and next, that those from the same quarter of the town should march in good order through the streets to the school of the harp-master,naked, and in a body, even if it were to snow as thick as meal. Then again, their master would teach them, not sitting cross-legged, to learn by rote a song, either “Παλλάδα περσέπολιν δεινὰν” or “τηλέπορόν τι βόαμα” raising to a higher pitch the harmony which our fathers transmitted to us. But if any of them were to play the buffoon, or to turn any quavers,like these difficult turns the present artists make after the manner of Phrynis, he used to be thrashed, being beaten with many blows, as banishing the Muses. And it behooved the boys, while sitting in the school of the Gymnastic-master, to cover the thigh, so that they might exhibit nothing indecent to those outside;
Δίκαιος Λόγος:λέξω τοίνυν τὴν ἀρχαίαν παιδείαν ὡς διέκειτο,ὅτʼ ἐγὼ τὰ δίκαια λέγων ἤνθουν καὶ σωφροσύνη ʼνενόμιστο.πρῶτον μὲν ἔδει παιδὸς φωνὴν γρύξαντος μηδὲν ἀκοῦσαι·εἶτα βαδίζειν ἐν ταῖσιν ὁδοῖς εὐτάκτως ἐς κιθαριστοῦτοὺς κωμήτας γυμνοὺς ἁθρόους, κεἰ κριμνώδη κατανείφοι.εἶτʼ αὖ προμαθεῖν ᾆσμʼ ἐδίδασκεν τὼ μηρὼ μὴ ξυνέχοντας,ἢ Παλλάδα περσέπολιν δεινὰν ἢ τηλέπορόν τι βόαμα,ἐντειναμένους τὴν ἁρμονίαν, ἣν οἱ πατέρες παρέδωκαν.εἰ δέ τις αὐτῶν βωμολοχεύσαιτʼ ἢ κάμψειέν τινα καμπήν,οἵας οἱ νῦν τὰς κατὰ Φρῦνιν ταύτας τὰς δυσκολοκάμπτους,ἐπετρίβετο τυπτόμενος πολλὰς ὡς τὰς Μούσας ἀφανίζων.ἐν παιδοτρίβου δὲ καθίζοντας τὸν μηρὸν ἔδει προβαλέσθαιτοὺς παῖδας, ὅπως τοῖς ἔξωθεν μηδὲν δείξειαν ἀπηνές·
then again, after rising from the ground, to sweep the sand together, and to take care not to leave an impression of the person for their lovers. And no boy used in those days to anoint himself below the navel; so that their bodies wore the appearance of blooming health. Nor used he to go to his lover, having made up his voice in an effeminate tone,prostituting himself with his eyes. Nor used it to be allowed when one was dining to take the head of the radish, or to snatch from their seniors dill or parsley, or to eat fish, or to giggle, or to keep the legs crossed.
εἶτʼ αὖ πάλιν αὖθις ἀνιστάμενον συμψῆσαι, καὶ προνοεῖσθαιεἴδωλον τοῖσιν ἐρασταῖσιν τῆς ἥβης μὴ καταλείπειν.ἠλείψατο δʼ ἂν τοὐμφαλοῦ οὐδεὶς παῖς ὑπένερθεν τότʼ ἄν, ὥστετοῖς αἰδοίοισι δρόσος καὶ χνοῦς ὥσπερ μήλοισιν ἐπήνθει·οὐδʼ ἂν μαλακὴν φυρασάμενος τὴν φωνὴν πρὸς τὸν ἐραστὴναὐτὸς ἑαυτὸν προαγωγεύων τοῖς ὀφθαλμοῖς ἐβάδιζεν,οὐδʼ ἀνελέσθαι δειπνοῦντʼ ἐξῆν καὶ κεφάλαιον ῥαφανῖδος,οὐδʼ ἄννηθον τῶν πρεσβυτέρων ἁρπάζειν οὐδὲ σέλινον,οὐδʼ ὀψοφαγεῖν οὐδὲ κιχλίζειν οὐδʼ ἴσχειν τὼ πόδʼ ἐναλλάξ.
Unjust Cause.:Aye, antiquated and dipolia-like and full of grasshoppers, and of Cecydes, and of the Buphonian festival!Just Cause.:Yet certainly these are those principles by which my system of education nurtured the men who fought at Marathon. But you teach the men of the present day, so that I am choked, when at the Panathenaia a fellow, holding his shield before his person, neglects Tritogenia, when they ought to dance.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:ἀρχαῖά γε καὶ Διιπολιώδη καὶ τεττίγων ἀνάμεστακαὶ Κηκείδου καὶ Βουφονίων.Δίκαιος Λόγος:ἀλλʼ οὖν ταῦτʼ ἐστὶν ἐκεῖνα,ἐξ ὧν ἄνδρας Μαραθωνομάχας ἡμὴ παίδευσις ἔθρεψεν.σὺ δὲ τοὺς νῦν εὐθὺς ἐν ἱματίοισι διδάσκεις ἐντετυλίχθαι·ὥστε μʼ ἀπάγχεσθʼ, ὅταν ὀρχεῖσθαι Παναθηναίοις δέον αὐτοὺςτὴν ἀσπίδα τῆς κωλῆς προέχων ἀμελῇ τῆς Τριτογενείας.
Wherefore, O youth, choose with confidence, me, the better cause, and you will learn to hate the Agora, and to refrain from baths, and to be ashamed of what is disgraceful, and to be enraged if any one jeer you, and to rise up from seats before your seniors when they approach, and not to behave ill toward your parents, and to do nothing elsethat is base, because you are to form in your mind an image of Modesty: and not to dart into the house of a dancing-woman, lest, while gaping after these things, being struck with an apple by a wanton, you should be damaged in your reputation: and not to contradict your father in anything; nor by calling him Iapetus, to reproach him with the ills of age, by which you were reared in your infancy.
πρὸς ταῦτʼ ὦ μειράκιον θαρρῶν ἐμὲ τὸν κρείττω λόγον αἱροῦ·κἀπιστήσει μισεῖν ἀγορὰν καὶ βαλανείων ἀπέχεσθαι,καὶ τοῖς αἰσχροῖς αἰσχύνεσθαι, κἂν σκώπτῃ τίς σε φλέγεσθαι·καὶ τῶν θάκων τοῖς πρεσβυτέροις ὑπανίστασθαι προσιοῦσιν,καὶ μὴ περὶ τοὺς σαυτοῦ γονέας σκαιουργεῖν, ἄλλο τε μηδὲναἰσχρὸν ποιεῖν, ὅτι τῆς αἰδοῦς μέλλεις τἄγαλμʼ ἀναπλάττειν·μηδʼ εἰς ὀρχηστρίδος εἰσᾴττειν, ἵνα μὴ πρὸς ταῦτα κεχηνὼςμήλῳ βληθεὶς ὑπὸ πορνιδίου τῆς εὐκλείας ἀποθραυσθῇς·μηδʼ ἀντειπεῖν τῷ πατρὶ μηδέν, μηδʼ Ἰαπετὸν καλέσανταμνησικακῆσαι τὴν ἡλικίαν ἐξ ἧς ἐνεοττοτροφήθης.
Unjust Cause.:If you shall believe him in this, O youth, by Bacchus, you will be like the sons of Hippocrates, and they will call you a booby.
Ἄδικος Λόγος:εἰ ταῦτʼ ὦ μειράκιον πείσει τούτῳ, νὴ τὸν Διόνυσοντοῖς Ἱπποκράτους υἱέσιν εἴξεις καὶ σε καλοῦσι βλιτομάμμαν.