1. CHARON: Pay the fare, curse you.
1. ΧΑΡΩΝ: Ἀπόδος, ὦ κατάρατε, τὰ πορθμεῖα.
MENIPPUS: Shout away, Charon, if that’s what you prefer.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Βόα, εἰ τοῦτό σοι, ὦ Χάρων, ἥδιον.
CHARON: Pay me, I say, for taking you across.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Ἀπόδος, φημί, ἀνθ' ὧν σε διεπορθμεύσαμεν.
MENIPPUS: You can’t get blood out of a stone.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Οὐκ ἂν λάβοις παρὰ τοῦ μὴ ἔχοντος.
CHARON: Is there anyone who hasn’t a single penny?
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Ἔστι δέ τις ὀβολὸν μὴ ἔχων;
MENIPPUS: I don’t know about anyone else, but I am without one.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Εἰ μὲν καὶ ἄλλος τις οὐκ οἶδα, ἐγὼ δ’ οὐκ ἔχω.
CHARON: But by Pluto, I’ll throttle you, you blackguard, if you don’t pay.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Καὶ μὴν ἄγξω σε νὴ τὸν Πλούτωνα, ὦ μιαρέ, ἢν μὴ ἀποδῷς.
MENIPPUS: And I’ll smash your head with a blow from my stick.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Κἀγὼ τῷ ξύλῳ σου πατάξας διαλύσω τὸ κρανίον.
CHARON: Then you’ll have sailed all this long way for nothing.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Μάτην οὖν ἔσῃ πεπλευκὼς τοσοῦτον πλοῦν.
MENIPPUS: Hermes delivered me to you; let him pay.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Ὁ Ἑρμῆς ὑπὲρ ἐμοῦ σοι ἀποδότω, ὅς με παρέδωκέ σοι.
2. HERMES: Heaven help me, if I’m going to pay for the dead too.
2. ΕΡΜΗΣ: Νὴ Δί' ὀναίμην γε, εἰ μέλλω καὶ ὑπερεκτίνειν τῶν νεκρῶν.
CHARON: I won’t leave you alone.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Οὐκ ἀποστήσομαί σου.
MENIPPUS: Then you’d better beach your ferry, and stay put; but how will you get what I don’t have?
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Τούτου γε ἕνεκα νεωλκήσας τὸ πορθμεῖον παράμενε· πλὴν ἀλλ’ ὅ γε μὴ ἔχω, πῶς ἂν λάβοις;
CHARON: Didn’t you know you had to bring it with you?
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Σὺ δ’ οὐκ ᾔδεις κομίζειν δέον;
MENIPPUS: Yes, but I didn’t have it. What of it? Did that make it wrong for me to die?
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Ἤιδειν μέν, οὐκ εἶχον δέ. τί οὖν; ἐχρῆν διὰ τοῦτο μὴ ἀποθανεῖν;
CHARON: So you’ll be the only one to boast of a free passage?
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Μόνος οὖν αὐχήσεις προῖκα πεπλευκέναι;
MENIPPUS: Not free, my good fellow; I baled, I helped at the oar, I was the only passenger who wasn’t weeping.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Οὐ προῖκα, ὦ βέλτιστε· καὶ γὰρ ἤντλησα καὶ τῆς κώπης συνεπελαβόμην καὶ οὐκ ἔκλαον μόνος τῶν ἄλλων ἐπιβατῶν.
CHARON: That’s nothing to do with a ferryman; your penny must be paid. No alternative’s allowed.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Οὐδὲν ταῦτα πρὸς πορθμέα· τὸν ὀβολὸν ἀποδοῦναί σε δεῖ· οὐ θέμις ἄλλως γενέσθαι.
3. MENIPPUS: Then take me back to life.
3. ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Οὐκοῦν ἄπαγέ με αὖθις ἐς τὸν βίον.
CHARON: That’s a bright remark! Do you want me also to get a thrashing from Aeacus for my pains?
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Χάριεν λέγεις, ἵνα καὶ πληγὰς ἐπὶ τούτῳ παρὰ τοῦ Αἰακοῦ προσλάβω.
MENIPPUS: Then don’t bother me.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Μὴ ἐνόχλει οὖν.
CHARON: Show me what you have in your bag.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Δεῖξον τί ἐν τῇ πήρᾳ ἔχεις.
MENIPPUS: Lupines, if you want some, and a meal meant for Hecate.
ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Θέρμους, εἰ θέλεις, καὶ τῆς Ἑκάτης τὸ δεῖπνον.
CHARON: Where did you find us this Dog, Hermes? How he chattered on the crossing too, mocking and jeering at all the passengers and singing on his own while they were lamenting!
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Πόθεν τοῦτον ἡμῖν, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, τὸν κύνα ἤγαγες; οἷα δὲ καὶ ἐλάλει παρὰ τὸν πλοῦν τῶν ἐπιβατῶν ἁπάντων καταγελῶν καὶ ἐπισκώπτων καὶ μόνος ᾄδων οἰμωζόντων ἐκείνων.
HERMES: Don’t you know, my dear Charon, what sort of man you’ve taken across? He is absolutely independent and cares for nobody. This is Menippus.
ΕΡΜΗΣ: Ἀγνοεῖς, ὦ Χάρων, ὅντινα ἄνδρα διεπόρθμευσας; ἐλεύθερον ἀκριβῶς· οὐδένος αὐτῷ μέλει. οὗτός ἐστιν ὁ Μένιππος.
CHARON: But if ever I get my hands on you— MENIPPUS: If you get your hands on me, my good fellow! But you won’t get them on me a second time.
ΧΑΡΩΝ: Καὶ μὴν ἄν σε λάβω ποτέ— ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ: Ἄν λάβῃς, ὦ βέλτιστε· δὶς δὲ οὐκ ἂν λάβοις.