---
title: "On Funerals · Περὶ Πένθους"
author: "Lucian"
translator: "Austin Morris Harmon"
languages: [grc, en]
shelf: "Classical Greek"
section: 1 of 1
url: https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-on-funerals/1/
cite: "Lucian, tr. Austin Morris Harmon, On Funerals · Περὶ Πένθους, section 1. Scriptura (scriptura.si), https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-on-funerals/1/"
---

# On Funerals · Περὶ Πένθους

*Lucian, tr. Austin Morris Harmon*

The follies of mourning.

> Greek: ed. Austin Morris Harmon, from the Perseus Digital Library (canonical-greekLit, tlg0062.tlg036, CC BY-SA 4.0).

> English: Austin Morris Harmon, from the Perseus Digital Library (tlg0062.tlg036.perseus-eng2). Notes are not included.

> Rows follow the references the two texts share (chapters and sections), cut where both reach the end of a sentence.

## 1. Sections 1–24

Source: https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-on-funerals/1/ · cite a paragraph as https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-on-funerals/1/#p-N

[¶0] 1. Truly, it is well worth while to observe what most people do and say at funerals, and on the other hand what their would-be comforters say; to observe also how unbearable the mourners consider what is happening, not only for themselves but for those whom they mourn. Yet, I swear by Pluto and Persephone, they have not one whit of definite knowledge as to whether this experience is unpleasant and worth grieving about, or on the contrary delightful and better for those who undergo it. No, they simply commit their grief into the charge of custom and habit. When someone dies, then, this is what they do—but stay! First I wish to tell you what beliefs they hold about death itself, for then it will become clear why they engage in these superfluous practices.

> Greek: 1. ἄξιόν γε παρατηρεῖν τὰ ὑπὸ τῶν πολλῶν ἐν τοῖς πένθεσι γιγνόμενα καὶ λεγόμενα καὶ τὰ ὑπὸ τῶν παραμυθουμένων δῆθεν αὐτοὺς αὖθις λεγόμενα, καὶ ὡς ἀφόρητα ἡγοῦνται τὰ συμβαίνοντα σφίσι τε αὐτοῖς οἱ ὀδυρόμενοι καὶ ἐκείνοις οὓς ὀδύρονται, οὐ μὰ τὸν Πλούτωνα καὶ Φερσεφόνην κατʼ οὐδὲν ἐπιστάμενοι σαφῶς οὔτε εἰ πονηρὰ ταῦτα καὶ λύπης ἄξια οὔτε εἰ τοὐναντίον ἡδέα καὶ βελτίω τοῖς παθοῦσι, νόμῳ δὲ καὶ συνηθείᾳ τὴν λύπην ἐπιτρέποντες. ἐπειδὰν τοίνυν ἀποθάνῃ τις, οὕτω ποιοῦσιν — μᾶλλον δὲ πρότερον εἰπεῖν βούλομαι ἅστινας περὶ αὐτοῦ τοῦ θανάτου δόξας ἔχουσιν· οὕτω γὰρ ἔσται φανερὸν οὗτινος ἕνεκα τὰ περιττὰ ἐκεῖνα ἐπιτηδεύουσιν.

[¶1] 2. The general herd, whom philosophers call the laity, trust Homer and Hesiod and the other mythmakers in these matters, and take their poetry for a law unto themselves. So they suppose that there is a place deep under the earth called Hades, which is large and roomy and murky and sunless; I don’t know how they imagine it to be lighted up so that everything in it can be seen. The king of the abyss is a brother of Zeus named Pluto, who has been honoured with that appellative, so I was told by one well versed in such matters, because of his wealth of corpses. This Pluto, they say, has organized his state and the world below as follows. He himself has been allotted the sovereignty of the dead, whom he receives, takes in charge, and retains in close custody, permitting nobody whatsoever to go back up above, except, in all time, a very few for most important reasons.

> Greek: 2. ὁ μὲν δὴ πολὺς ὅμιλος, οὓς ἰδιώτας οἱ σοφοὶ καλοῦσιν, Ὁμήρῳ τε καὶ Ἡσιόδῳ καὶ τοῖς ἄλλοις μυθοποιοῖς περὶ τούτων πειθόμενοι καὶ νόμον θέμενοι τὴν ποίησιν αὐτῶν, τόπον τινα ὑπὸ τῇ γῇ βαθὺν Ἅιδην ὑπειλήφασιν, μέγαν δὲ καὶ πολύχωρον τοῦτον εἶναι καὶ ζοφερὸν καὶ ἀνήλιον, οὐκ οἶδʼ ὅπως αὐτοῖς φωτίζεσθαι δοκοῦντα πρὸς τὸ καὶ καθορᾶν τῶν ἐνόντων ἕκαστον· βασιλεύειν δὲ τοῦ χάσματος ἀδελφὸν τοῦ Διὸς Πλούτωνα κεκλημένον, ὥς μοι τῶν τὰ τοιαῦτα δεινῶν τις ἔλεγε, διὰ τὸ πλουτεῖν τοῖς νεκροῖς τῇ προσηγορίᾳ τετιμημένον. τοῦτον δὲ τὸν Πλούτωνα τὴν παρʼ αὑτῷ πολιτείαν καὶ τὸν κάτω βίον καταστήσασθαι τοιοῦτον· κεκληρῶσθαι μὲν γὰρ αὐτὸν ἄρχειν τῶν ἀποθανόντων, καταδεξάμενον δὲ αὐτοὺς καὶ παραλαβόντα κατέχειν δεσμοῖς ἀφύκτοις, οὐδενὶ τὸ παράπαν τῆς ἄνω ὁδοῦ ὑφιέμενον πλὴν ἐξ ἅπαντος τοῦ αἰῶνος πάνυ ὀλίγων ἐπὶ μεγίσταις αἰτίαις.

[¶2] 3. His country is surrounded by great rivers, fearful even in name; for they are called “Wailing,” “Burning Fire,’ and the like. But the principal feature is Lake Acheron, which lies in front and first receives visitors; it cannot be crossed or passed without the ferryman, for it is too deep to ford afoot and too broad to swim across—indeed, even dead birds cannot fly across it!

> Greek: 3. περιρρεῖσθαι δὲ τὴν χώραν αὐτοῦ ποταμοῖς μεγάλοις τε καὶ φοβεροῖς καὶ ἐκ μόνων τῶν ὀνομάτων· Κωκυτοὶ γὰρ καὶ Πυριφλεγέθοντες καὶ τὰ τοιαῦτα κέκληνται. τὸ δὲ μέγιστον, ἡ Ἀχερουσία λίμνη πρόκειται πρώτη δεχομένη τοὺς ἀπαντῶντας, ἣν οὐκ ἔνι διαπλεῦσαι ἢ παρελθεῖν ἄνευ τοῦ πορθμέως· βαθεῖά τε γὰρ περᾶσαι τοῖς ποσὶν καὶ διανήξασθαι πολλή, καὶ ὅλως οὐκ ἂν αὐτὴν διαπταίη οὐδὲ τὰ νεκρὰ τῶν ὀρνέων.

[¶3] 4. Hard by the descent and the portal, which is of adamant, stands the king’s nephew, Aeacus, who is commander of the guard; and beside him is a three-headed dog, very long-fanged, who gives a friendly, peaceable glance to those who come in, but howls at those who try to run away and frightens them with his great mouth.

> Greek: 4. πρὸς δὲ αὐτῇ τῇ καθόδῳ καὶ πύλῃ οὔσῃ ἀδαμαντίνῃ ἀδελφιδοῦς τοῦ βασιλέως Αἰακὸς ἕστηκε τὴν φρουρὰν ἐπιτετραμμένος καὶ παρʼ αὐτῷ κύων τρικέφαλος μάλα κάρχαρος, τοὺς μὲν ἀφικνουμένους φίλιόν τι καὶ εἰρηνικὸν προσβλέπων, τοὺς δὲ πειρῶντας ἀποδιδράσκειν ὑλακτῶν καὶ τῷ χάσματι δεδιττόμενος.

[¶4] 5. After passing the lake on going in, one comes next to a great meadow overgrown with asphodel, and to a spring that is inimical to memory; in fact, they call it “Oblivion” for that reason. All this, by the way, was told to the ancients by people who came back from there, Alcestis and Protesilaus of Thessaly, Theseus, son of Aegeus, and Homer's Odysseus, highly respectable and trustworthy witnesses, who, I suppose, did not drink of the spring, or else they would not have remembered it all.

> Greek: 5. περαιωθέντας δὲ τὴν λίμνην εἰς τὸ εἴσω λειμὼν ὑποδέχεται μέγας τῷ ἀσφοδέλῳ κατάφυτος καὶ ποτὸν μνήμης πολέμιον· Λήθης γοῦν διὰ τοῦτο ὠνόμασται. ταῦτα γὰρ ἀμέλει διηγήσαντο τοῖς πάλαι ἐκεῖθεν ἀφιγμένοι Ἄλκηστίς τε καὶ Πρωτεσίλαος οἱ Θετταλοὶ καὶ Θησεὺς ὁ τοῦ Αἰγέως καὶ ὁ τοῦ Ὁμήρου Ὀδυσσεύς, μάλα σεμνοὶ καὶ ἀξιόπιστοι μάρτυρες, ἐμοὶ δοκεῖν οὐ πιόντες τῆς πηγῆς· οὐ γὰρ ἂν ἐμέμνηντο αὐτῶν.

[¶5] 6. Well, Pluto and Persephone, as these people said, are the rulers and have the general over-lordship, with a great throng of understrappers and assistants in administration—Furies, Tormentors, Terrors, and also Hermes, who, however, is not always with them.

> Greek: 6. ὁ μὲν οὖν Πλούτων, ὡς ἐκεῖνοι ἔφασαν, καὶ ἡ Φερσεφόνη δυναστεύουσι καὶ τὴν τῶν ὅλων δεσποτείαν ἔχουσιν, ὑπηρετοῦσι δʼ αὐτοῖς καὶ τὴν ἀρχὴν συνδιαπράττουσιν ὄχλος πολύς, Ἐρινύες τε καὶ Ποιναὶ καὶ Φόβοι καὶ ὁ Ἑρμῆς, οὗτος μέν γε οὐκ ἀεὶ συμπαρών.

[¶6] 7. As prefects, moreover, and satraps and judges, there are two that hold court, Minos and Rhadamanthus of Crete, who are sons of Zeus. These receive the good, just men who have lived virtuously, and when many have been collected, send them off, as if to a colony, to the Elysian Fields to take part in the best life.

> Greek: 7. ὕπαρχοι δὲ καὶ σατράπαι καὶ δικασταὶ κάθηνται δύο, Μίνως τε καὶ Ῥαδάμανθυς οἱ Κρῆτες, ὄντες υἱοὶ τοῦ Διός. οὗτοι δὲ τοὺς μὲν ἀγαθοὺς τῶν ἀνδρῶν καὶ δικαίους καὶ κατʼ ἀρετὴν βεβιωκότας, ἐπειδὰν συναλισθῶσι πολλοί, καθάπερ εἰς ἀποικίαν τινὰ πέμπουσιν εἰς τὸ Ἠλύσιον πεδίον τῷ ἀρίστῳ βίῳ συνεσομένους.

[¶7] 8. But if they come upon any rascals, turning them over to the Furies, they send them to the Place of the Wicked, to be punished in proportion to their wickedness. There—ah! what punishment do they not undergo? They are racked, burned, devoured by vultures, turned upon a wheel; they roll stones uphill; and as for Tantalus, he stands on the very brink of the lake with a parched throat, like to die, poor fellow, for thirst!

> Greek: 8. ἂν δέ τινας τῶν πονηρῶν λάβωσι, ταῖς Ἐρινύσι παραδόντες εἰς τὸν τῶν ἀσεβῶν χῶρον εἰσπέμπουσι κατὰ λόγον τῆς ἀδικίας κολασθησομένους. ἔνθα δὴ τί κακῶν οὐ πάσχουσι στρεβλούμενοί τε καὶ καιόμενοι καὶ ὑπὸ γυπῶν ἐσθιόμενοι καὶ τροχῷ συμπεριφερόμενοι καὶ λίθους ἀνακυλίοντες; ὁ μὲν γὰρ Τάνταλος ἐπʼ αὐτῇ τῇ λίμνῃ αὖος ἕστηκεν κινδυνεύων ὑπὸ δίψους ὁ κακοδαίμων ἀποθανεῖν.

[¶8] 9. But those of the middle way in life, and they are many, wander about in the meadow without their bodies, in the form of shadows that vanish like smoke in your fingers. They get their nourishment, naturally, from the libations that are poured in our world and the burnt-offerings at the tomb; so that if anyone has not left a friend or kinsman behind him on earth, he goes about his business there as an unfed corpse, in a state of famine.

> Greek: 9. οἱ δὲ τοῦ μέσου βίου, πολλοὶ ὄντες οὗτοι, ἐν τῷ λειμῶνι πλανῶνται ἄνευ τῶν σωμάτων σκιαὶ γενόμενοι καὶ ὑπὸ τῇ ἁφῇ καθάπερ καπνὸς ἀφανιζόμενοι. τρέφονται δὲ ἄρα ταῖς παρʼ ἡμῖν χοαῖς καὶ τοῖς καθαγιζομένοις ἐπὶ τῶν τάφων· ὡς εἴ τῳ μὴ εἴη καταλελειμμένος ὑπὲρ γῆς φίλος ἢ συγγενής, ἄσιτος οὗτος νεκρὸς καὶ λιμώττων ἐν αὐτοῖς πολιτεύεται.

[¶9] 10. So thoroughly are people taken in by all this that when one of the family dies, immediately they bring an obol and put it into his mouth, to pay the ferryman for setting him over. They do not stop to consider what sort of coinage is customary and current in the lower world, and whether it is the Athenian or the Macedonian or the Aeginetan obol that is legal tender there; nor, indeed, that it would be far better not to be able to pay the fare, since in that case the ferryman would not take them and they would be escorted back to life again.

> Greek: 10. ταῦτα οὕτως ἰσχυρῶς περιελήλυθε τοὺς πολλοὺς ὥστε ἐπειδάν τις ἀποθάνῃ τῶν οἰκείων, πρῶτα μὲν φέροντες ὀβολὸν εἰς τὸ στόμα κατέθηκαν αὐτῷ, μισθὸν τῷ πορθμεῖ τῆς ναυτιλίας γενησόμενον, οὐ πρότερον ἐξετάσαντες ὁποῖον τὸ νόμισμα νομίζεται καὶ διαχωρεῖ παρὰ τοῖς κάτω, καὶ εἰ δύναται παρʼ ἐκείνοις Ἀττικὸς ἢ Μακεδονικὸς ἢ Αἰγιναῖος ὀβολός, οὐδʼ ὅτι πολὺ κάλλιον ἦν μὴ ἔχειν τὰ πορθμεῖα καταβαλεῖν· οὕτω γὰρ ἂν οὐ παραδεξαμένου τοῦ πορθμέως ἀναπόμπιμοι πάλιν εἰς τὸν βίον ἀφικνοῦντο.

[¶10] 11. Then they bathe them (as if the lake down below were not big enough for the people there to bathe in); and after anointing with the finest of perfume that body which is already hasting to corruption, and crowning ‘it with pretty flowers, they lay them in state, clothed in splendid raiment, which, very likely, is intended to keep them from being cold on the way and from being seen undressed by Cerberus.

> Greek: 11. μετὰ ταῦτα δὲ λούσαντες αὐτούς, ὡς οὐχ ἱκανῆς τῆς κάτω λίμνης λουτρὸν εἶναι τοῖς ἐκεῖ, καὶ μύρῳ τῷ καλλίστῳ χρίσαντες τὸ σῶμα πρὸς δυσωδίαν ἤδη βιαζόμενον καὶ στεφανώσαντες τοῖς ὡραίοις ἄνθεσι προτίθενται λαμπρῶς ἀμφιέσαντες, ἵνα μὴ ῥιγῷεν δῆλον ὅτι παρὰ τὴν ὁδὸν μηδὲ γυμνοὶ βλέποιντο τῷ Κερβέρῳ.

[¶11] 12. Next come cries of distress, wailing of women, tears on all sides, beaten breasts, torn hair, and bloody cheeks. Perhaps, too, clothing is rent and dust sprinkled on the head, and the living are in a plight more pitiable than the dead; for they roll on the ground repeatedly and dash their heads against the floor, while he, all serene and handsome and elaborately decked with wreaths, lies in lofty, exalted state, bedizened as for a pageant.

> Greek: 12. οἰμωγαὶ δὲ ἐπὶ τούτοις καὶ κωκυτὸς γυναικῶν καὶ παρὰ πάντων δάκρυα καὶ στέρνα τυπτόμενα καὶ σπαραττομένη κόμη καὶ φοινισσόμεναι παρειαί· καί που καὶ ἐσθὴς καταρρήγνυται καὶ κόνις ἐπὶ τῇ κεφαλῇ πάσσεται, καὶ οἱ ζῶντες οἰκτρότεροι τοῦ νεκροῦ· οἱ μὲν γὰρ χαμαὶ κυλινδοῦνται πολλάκις καὶ τὰς κεφαλὰς ἀράττουσι πρὸς τὸ ἔδαφος, ὁ δʼ εὐσχήμων καὶ καλὸς καὶ καθʼ ὑπερβολὴν ἐστεφανωμένος ὑψηλὸς πρόκειται καὶ μετέωρος ὥσπερ εἰς πομπὴν κεκοσμημένος.

[¶12] 13. Then his mother, or indeed his father comes forward from among the family and throws himself upon him; for let us imagine a handsome young man upon the bier, so that the show that is acted over him may be the more moving. The father utters strange, foolish outcries to which the dead man himself would make answer if he could speak. In a plaintive tone, protracting every word, he will say: “Dearest child, you are gone from me, dead, reft away before your time, leaving me behind all alone, woe is me, before marrying, before having children, before serving in the army, before working on the farm, before coming to old age; never again will you roam the streets at night, or fall in love, my child, or drink deep at wine-parties with your young friends.”

> Greek: 13. εἶθʼ ἡ μήτηρ ἢ καὶ νὴ Δία ὁ πατὴρ ἐκ μέσων τῶν συγγενῶν προελθὼν καὶ περιχυθεὶς αὐτῷ — προκείσθω γάρ τις νέος καὶ καλός, ἵνα καὶ ἀκμαιότερον τὸ ἐπʼ αὐτῷ δρᾶμα ᾖ — φωνὰς ἀλλοκότους καὶ ματαίας ἀφίησι, πρὸς ἃς ὁ νεκρὸς αὐτὸς ἀποκρίναιτʼ ἄν, εἰ λάβοι φωνήν· φήσει γὰρ ὁ πατὴρ γοερόν τι φθεγγόμενος καὶ παρατείνων ἕκαστον τῶν ὀνομάτων, τέκνον ἥδιστον, οἴχῃ μοι καὶ τέθνηκας καὶ πρὸ ὥρας ἀνηρπάσθης, μόνον ἐμὲ τὸν ἄθλιον καταλιπών, οὐ γαμήσας, οὐ παιδοποιησάμενος, οὐ στρατευσάμενος, οὐ γεωργήσας, οὐκ εἰς γῆρας ἐλθών· οὐ κωμάσῃ πάλιν οὐδὲ ἐρασθήσῃ, τέκνον, οὐδὲ ἐν συμποσίοις μετὰ τῶν ἡλικιωτῶν μεθυσθήσῃ.

[¶13] 14. He will say all that, and more in the same tenor, thinking that his son still needs and wants this sort of thing even after death, but cannot get it. But that is nothing. Have not many sacrificed horses, concubines, sometimes even cup-bearers, over their dead, and burned or buried with them clothing and other articles of personal adornment, as if they would use them there and get some good of them down below?

> Greek: 14. ταῦτα δὲ καὶ τὰ τοιαῦτα φήσει οἰόμενος τὸν υἱὸν δεῖσθαι μὲν ἔτι τούτων καὶ ἐπιθυμεῖν καὶ μετὰ τὴν τελευτήν, οὐ δύνασθαι δὲ μετέχειν αὐτῶν. καίτοι τί ταῦτα φημί; πόσοι γὰρ καὶ ἵππους καὶ παλλακίδας, οἱ δὲ καὶ οἰνοχόους ἐπικατέσφαξαν καὶ ἐσθῆτα καὶ τὸν ἄλλον κόσμον συγκατέφλεξαν ἢ συγκατώρυξαν ὡς χρησομένοις ἐκεῖ καὶ ἀπολαύσουσιν αὐτῶν κάτω;

[¶14] 15. But as to the old man who mourns after this fashion, it is not, in all probability, on account of his son that he does all this melodramatic ranting that I have mentioned, and more than I have mentioned; for he knows that his son will not hear him even if he shouts louder than Stentor. Nor yet is it on his own account; for it would have been enough to think this and have it in mind, without his shouting—nobody needs to shout at himself. Consequently it is on account of the others present that he talks this nonsense, when he does not know what has happened to his son nor where he has gone; in fact he has not even considered what life itself is, or else he would not take on so about the leaving of it, as if that were something dreadful.

> Greek: 15. ὁ δʼ οὖν πρεσβύτης ὁ πενθῶν οὑτωσὶ ταῦτα πάντα ὁπόσα εἴρηκα καὶ ἔτι τούτων πλείονα οὔτε τοῦ παιδὸς ἕνεκα τραγῳδεῖν ἔοικεν — οἶδε γὰρ οὐκ ἀκουσόμενον οὐδʼ ἂν μεῖζον ἐμβοήσῃ τοῦ Στέντορος — οὔτε μὴν αὑτοῦ· φρονεῖν γὰρ οὕτω καὶ γιγνώσκειν ἱκανὸν ἦν καὶ ἄνευ τῆς βοῆς· οὐδεὶς γὰρ δὴ πρὸς ἑαυτὸν δεῖται βοᾶν. λοιπὸν οὖν ἐστιν αὐτὸν τῶν παρόντων ἕνεκα ταῦτα ληρεῖν οὔθʼ ὅ τι πέπονθεν αὐτῷ ὁ παῖς εἰδότα οὔθʼ ὅποι κεχώρηκε, μᾶλλον δὲ οὐδὲ τὸν βίον αὐτὸν ἐξετάσαντα ὁποῖός ἐστιν· οὐ γὰρ ἂν τὴν ἐξ αὐτοῦ μετάστασιν ὥς τι τῶν δεινῶν ἐδυσχέραινεν.

[¶15] 16. If his son should receive permission from Aeacus and Aidoneus to put his head out of the mouth of the pit for a moment and stop his father’s silliness, he would say: “Unfortunate man, why do you shriek? Why do you trouble me? Stop tearing your hair and marring the skin of your face!- Why do you call me names and speak of me as wretched and ill-starred when I have become far better off and happier than you? What dreadful misfortune do you think I am undergoing? Is it that I did not get to be an old man like you, with your head bald, your face wrinkled, your back bent, and your knees trembling,—like you, who in short are rotten with age after filling out so many months and so many Olympiads, and who now, at the last, go out of your mind in the presence of so many witnesses? Foolish man, what advantage do you think there is in life that we shall never again partake of? You will say drinking, no doubt, and dinners, and dress, and love, and you are afraid that for the want of all this I shall die! But are you unaware that not to thirst is far better than drinking, not to hunger than eating, and not to be cold than to have quantities of clothing?

> Greek: 16. εἴποι δʼ ἂν οὖν πρὸς αὐτὸν ὁ παῖς παραιτησάμενος τὸν Αἰακὸν καὶ τὸν Ἀϊδωνέα πρὸς ὀλίγον τοῦ στομίου ὑπερκῦψαι καὶ τὸν πατέρα παῦσαι ματαιάζοντα, ὦ κακόδαιμον ἄνθρωπε, τί κέκραγας; τί δέ μοι παρέχεις πράγματα; παῦσαι τιλλόμενος τὴν κόμην καὶ τὸ πρόσωπον ἐξ ἐπιπολῆς ἀμύσσων. τί μοι λοιδορῇ καὶ ἄθλιον ἀποκαλεῖς καὶ δύσμορον πολύ σου βελτίω καὶ μακαριώτερον γεγενημένον; ἢ τί σοι δεινὸν πάσχειν δοκῶ; ἢ διότι μὴ τοιουτοσὶ γέρων ἐγενόμην οἷος εἶ σύ, φαλακρὸς μὲν τὴν κεφαλήν, τὴν δὲ ὄψιν ἐρρυτιδωμένος, κυφὸς καὶ τὰ γόνατα νωθής, καὶ ὅλως ὑπὸ τοῦ χρόνου σαθρὸς πολλὰς τριακάδας καὶ ὀλυμπιάδας ἀναπλήσας, καὶ τὰ τελευταῖα δὴ ταῦτα παραπαίων ἐπὶ τοσούτων μαρτύρων; ὦ μάταιε, τί σοι χρηστὸν εἶναι δοκεῖ παρὰ τὸν βίον οὗ μηκέτι μεθέξομεν; ἢ τοὺς πότους ἐρεῖς δῆλον ὅτι καὶ τὰ δεῖπνα καὶ ἐσθῆτα καὶ ἀφροδίσια, καὶ δέδιας μὴ τούτων ἐνδεὴς γενόμενος ἀπόλωμαι. οὐκ ἐννοεῖς δὲ ὅτι τὸ μὴ διψῆν τοῦ πιεῖν πολὺ κάλλιον καὶ τὸ μὴ πεινῆν τοῦ φαγεῖν καὶ τὸ μὴ ῥιγοῦν τοῦ ἀμπεχόνης εὐπορεῖν; φέρε τοίνυν, ἐπειδὴ ἔοικας ἀγνοεῖν, διδάξομαί σε θρηνεῖν ἀληθέστερον, καὶ δὴ ἀναλαβὼν ἐξ ὑπαρχῆς βόα, τέκνον ἄθλιον, οὐκέτι διψήσεις, οὐκέτι πεινήσεις οὐδὲ ῥιγώσεις.

[¶16] 17. “Come now, since you apparently do not know how to mourn, I will teach you to do it more truth- fully. Begin afresh, and ery, ‘Poor child, never again will you be thirsty, never again hungry or cold! You are gone from me, poor boy, escaping diseases, no longer fearing fever or foeman or tyrant. Love shall not vex you nor its pleasures rack you, nor shal] you squander your strength in them twice and thrice a day, woe is me! You shall not be scorned in your old age, nor shall the sight of you offend the young!’

> Greek: 17. οἴχῃ μοι κακοδαίμων ἐκφυγὼν τὰς νόσους, οὐ πυρετὸν ἔτι δεδιώς, οὐ πολέμιον, οὐ τύραννον· οὐκ ἔρως σε ἀνιάσει οὐδὲ συνουσία διαστρέψει, οὐδὲ σπαθήσεις ἐπὶ τούτῳ δὶς ἢ τρὶς τῆς ἡμέρας, ὢ τῆς συμφορᾶς. οὐ καταφρονηθήσῃ γέρων γενόμενος οὐδὲ ὀχληρὸς ἔσῃ τοῖς νέοις βλεπόμενος.

[¶17] 18. If you say this, father, don't you think it will be far more true and more manly than what you said before? “But perhaps it is something else that worries you. You are thinking of the gloom where we are, and the profound darkness, and so you fear that I may be stifled in the close custody of the tomb. On that point you should reflect that as my eyes will very soon be corrupted or even burned, if you have decided to burn me, I shall have no need either for darkness or for light as far as seeing is concerned.

> Greek: 18. ἂν ταῦτα λέγῃς, ὦ πάτερ, οὐκ οἴει πολὺ ἀληθέστερα καὶ γενναιότερα ἐκείνων ἐρεῖν; ἀλλʼ ἆρα μὴ τόδε σε ἀνιᾷ, καὶ διανοῇ τὸν παρʼ ἡμῖν ζόφον καὶ τὸ πολὺ σκότος, κᾆτα δέδιας μή σοι ἀποπνιγῶ κατακλεισθεὶς ἐν τῷ μνήματι; χρὴ δὲ πρὸς ταῦτα λογίζεσθαι ὅτι τῶν ὀφθαλμῶν διασαπέντων ἢ καὶ νὴ Δία καέντων μετʼ ὀλίγον, εἴ γε καῦσαί με διεγνώκατε, οὔτε σκότος οὔτε φῶς ὁρᾶν δεησόμεθα.

[¶18] 19. “That fear, however, is perhaps reasonable enough; but what good do you think I get from your wailing, and this beating of breasts to the music of the flute, and the extravagant conduct of the women in lamenting? Or from the wreathed stone above my grave? Or what, pray, is the use of your pouring out the pure wine? You don't think, do you, that it will drip down to where we are and get all the way through to Hades? As to the burnt offerings, you yourselves see, I think, that the most nourishing part of your provender is carried off up to Heaven by the smoke without doing us in the lower world the least bit of good, and that what is left, the ashes, is useless, unless you believe that we eat dust. Pluto’s realm is not so devoid of seed and grain, nor is there any dearth of asphodel among us, so that we must import our food from you. So, by Tisiphone, the inclination seized me long ago to burst out in a tremendous guffaw over what you were doing and saying; but I was prevented by the winding-sheet and by the fillets with which you have bound up my jaws.”

> Greek: 19. καὶ ταῦτα μὲν ἴσως μέτρια· τί δέ με ὁ κωκυτὸς ὑμῶν ὀνίνησι καὶ ἡ πρὸς τὸν αὐλὸν αὕτη στερνοτυπία καὶ ἡ τῶν γυναικῶν περὶ τὸν θρῆνον ἀμετρία; τί δὲ ὁ ὑπὲρ τοῦ τάφου λίθος ἐστεφανωμένος; ἢ τί ὑμῖν δύναται τὸν ἄκρατον ἐπιχεῖν; ἢ νομίζετε καταστάξειν αὐτὸν πρὸς ἡμᾶς καὶ μέχρι τοῦ Ἅιδου διίξεσθαι; τὰ μὲν γὰρ ἐπὶ τῶν καθαγισμῶν καὶ αὐτοὶ ὁρᾶτε, οἶμαι, ὡς τὸ μὲν νοστιμώτατον τῶν παρεσκευασμένων ὁ καπνὸς παραλαβὼν ἄνω εἰς τὸν οὐρανὸν οἴχεται μηδέν τι ἡμᾶς ὀνῆσαν τοὺς κάτω, τὸ δὲ καταλειπόμενον, ἡ κόνις, ἀχρεῖον, ἐκτὸς εἰ μὴ τὴν σποδὸν ἡμᾶς σιτεῖσθαι πεπιστεύκατε. οὐχ οὕτως ἄσπορος οὐδὲ ἄκαρπος ἡ τοῦ Πλούτωνος ἀρχή, οὐδὲ ἐπιλέλοιπεν ἡμᾶς ὁ ἀσφόδελος, ἵνα παρʼ ὑμῶν τὰ σιτία μεταστελλώμεθα. ὥστε μοι νὴ τὴν Τισιφόνην πάλαι δὴ ἐφʼ οἷς ἐποιεῖτε καὶ ἐλέγετε παμμέγεθες ἐπῄει ἀνακαγχάσαι, διεκώλυσε δὲ ἡ ὀθόνη καὶ τὰ ἔρια, οἷς μου τὰς σιαγόνας ἀπεσφίγξατε.

[¶19] 20. These words spoken, at once the doom of death overwhelmed him.
By Heaven, if the dead man should face them, raising himself upon his elbow, and say all this, don’t you think he would be quite right? Nevertheless, the dolts not only shriek and scream, but they send for a sort of professor of threnodies, who has gathered a repertory of ancient bereavements, and they use him as fellow-actor and prompter in their silly performance, coming in with their groans at the close of each strain that he strikes up!

> Greek: 20. ὣς ἄρα μιν εἰπόντα τέλος θανάτοιο κάλυψε. πρὸς Διός, ἐὰν λέγῃ ταῦτα ὁ νεκρὸς ἐπιστραφείς, ἀνακλίνας αὑτὸν ἐπʼ ἀγκῶνος, οὐκ ἂν οἰόμεθα δικαιότατα ἂν αὐτὸν εἰπεῖν; ἀλλʼ ὅμως οἱ μάταιοι καὶ βοῶσι καὶ μεταστειλάμενοί τινα θρήνων σοφιστὴν πολλὰς συνειλοχότα παλαιὰς συμφορὰς τούτῳ συναγωνιστῇ καὶ χορηγῷ τῆς ἀνοίας καταχρῶνται, ὅπη ἂν ἐκεῖνος ἐξάρχῃ πρὸς τὸ μέλος ἐπαιάζοντες.

[¶20] 21. Up to that point, the wailing, the same stupid custom prevails everywhere; but in what follows, the burial, they have apportioned out among themselves, nation by nation, the different modes. The Greek burns, the Persian buries, the Indian encases in glass, the Scythian eats, the Egyptian salts. And the latter—I have seen whereof I speak—after drying the dead man makes him his guest at table! Many a time, too, when an Egyptian wants money, his brother or his father helps him out of his straits by becoming security at the critical juncture.

> Greek: 21. καὶ μέχρι μὲν θρήνων ὁ αὐτὸς ἅπασι νόμος τῆς ἀβελτερίας· τὸ δὲ ἀπὸ τούτου διελόμενοι κατὰ ἔθνη τὰς ταφὰς ὁ μὲν Ἕλλην ἔκαυσεν, ὁ δὲ Πέρσης ἔθαψεν, ὁ δὲ Ἰνδὸς ὑάλῳ περιχρίει, ὁ δὲ Σκύθης κατεσθίει, ταριχεύει δὲ ὁ Αἰγύπτιος· οὗτος μέν γε — λέγω δὲ ἰδών — ξηράνας τὸν νεκρὸν σύνδειπνον καὶ συμπότην ἐποιήσατο. πολλάκις δὲ καὶ δεομένῳ χρημάτων ἀνδρὶ Αἰγυπτίῳ ἔλυσε τὴν ἀπορίαν ἐνέχυρον ἢ ὁ ἀδελφὸς ἢ ὁ πατὴρ ἐν καιρῷ γενόμενος.

[¶21] 22. Regarding grave-mounds, pyramids, tombstones, and epitaphs, all of which endure but a brief space, are they not superfluous and akin to child’s play?

> Greek: 22. χώματα μὲν γὰρ καὶ πυραμίδες καὶ στῆλαι καὶ ἐπιγράμματα πρὸς ὀλίγον διαρκοῦντα πῶς οὐ περιττὰ καὶ παιδιαῖς προσεοικότα;

[¶22] 23. Some people, moreover, even hold competitions and deliver funeral orations at the monuments, as if they were pleading or testifying on behalf of the dead man before the judges down below!

> Greek: 23. καίτοι καὶ ἀγῶνας ἔνιοι διέθεσαν καὶ λόγους ἐπιταφίους εἶπον ἐπὶ τῶν μνημάτων ὥσπερ συναγορεύοντες ἢ μαρτυροῦντες παρὰ τοῖς κάτω δικασταῖς τῷ νεκρῷ.

[¶23] 24. As the finishing touch to all this, there is the funeral feast, and the relatives come in, consoling the parents of the departed, and inducing them to taste something. The parents themselves, I must say, do not find it disagreeable to be constrained, but are already done up with three days of continuous fasting. It is: “Man dear, how long are we to lament? Let the spirits of the departed rest! But if you have absolutely decided to keep on weeping, for that very reason you must not abstain from food, in order that you may prove equal to the magnitude of your sorrow.” Then, ah! then, two lines of Homer are recited by everyone:
Verily Niobe also, the fair-tressed, thought of her dinner,
and
Mourning the dead by fasting is not to be done by Achaeans,
So they break bread, of course, but do it at first in shame, and in fear that they will disclose themselves to be still subject to human appetites after the death of their dearest. You will find, if you take note, that these things and others still more ridiculous are done at funerals, for the reason that people think death the greatest of misfortunes.

> Greek: 24. ἐπὶ πᾶσι τούτοις τὸ περίδειπνον, καὶ πάρεισιν οἱ προσήκοντες καὶ τοὺς γονέας παραμυθοῦνται τοῦ τετελευτηκότος καὶ πείθουσι γεύσασθαι, οὐκ ἀηδῶς μὰ Δία οὐδʼ αὐτοὺς ἀναγκαζομένους, ἀλλὰ ἤδη ὑπὸ λιμοῦ τριῶν ἑξῆς ἡμερῶν ἀπηυδηκότας. καί, μέχρι μὲν τίνος, ὦ οὗτος, ὀδυρόμεθα; ἔασον ἀναπαύσασθαι τοὺς τοῦ μακαρίτου δαίμονας· εἰ δὲ καὶ τὸ παράπαν κλάειν διέγνωκας, αὐτοῦ γε τούτου ἕνεκα χρὴ μὴ ἀπόσιτον εἶναι, ἵνα καὶ διαρκέσῃς πρὸς τοῦ πένθους τὸ μέγεθος. τότε δὴ τότε ῥαψωδοῦνται πρὸς ἁπάντων δύο τοῦ Ὁμήρου στίχοι· καὶ γάρ τʼ ἠΰκομος Νιόβη ἐμνήσατο σίτου· καὶ γαστέρι δʼ οὔπως ἐστὶ νέκυν πενθῆσαι Ἀχαιούς. οἱ δὲ ἅπτονται μέν, αἰσχυνόμενοι δὲ τὰ πρῶτα καὶ δεδιότες εἰ φανοῦνται μετὰ τὴν τελευτὴν τῶν φιλτάτων τοῖς ἀνθρωπίνοις πάθεσιν ἐμμένοντες. ταῦτα καὶ πολὺ τούτων γελοιότερα εὕροι τις ἂν ἐπιτηρῶν ἐν τοῖς πένθεσι γιγνόμενα διὰ τὸ τοὺς πολλοὺς τὸ μέγιστον τῶν κακῶν τὸν θάνατον οἴεσθαι.