MICYLLUS: Without food and drink, my friend?
Μίκυλλος: ἄσιτος ὤν, ὦ τάν, καὶ ἄποτος;
COCK: Yes, certainly; for they turned out to be unnecessary, except for the body.
Ἀλεκτρυών: καὶ μάλα· οὐδὲ γὰρ ἔδει τούτων ἢ μόνῳ τῷ σώματι.
MICYLLUS: Well, then, tell me the story of Troy first. Was it all as Homer says?
Μίκυλλος: οὐκοῦν τὰ ἐν Ἰλίῳ μοι πρότερον εἰπέ. τοιαῦτα ἦν οἷά φησιν Ὅμηρος γενέσθαι αὐτά;
COCK: Why, where did he get his information, Micyllus? When all that was going on, he was a camel in Bactria. Tl tell you thus much, though: nothing was out of the common then, and Ajax was not as tall and Helen herself not as fair as people think. As I saw her, she had a white complexion and a long neck, to be sure, so that you might know she was the daughter of a swan; but as for the rest of it, she was decidedly old, about the saine age as Hecuba; for Theseus eloped with her in the first place and kept her at Aphidnae, and Theseus lived in the time of Heracles, who took Troy the first time it was taken, in the time of our fathers,—our then fathers, Imean. Panthous told me all this, and said that when he was quite small he had seen Heracles.
Ἀλεκτρυών: πόθεν ἐκεῖνος ἠπίστατο, ὦ Μίκυλλε, ὃς γινομένων ἐκείνων κάμηλος ἐν Βάκτροις ἦν; ἐγὼ δὲ τοσοῦτόν σοί φημι, ὑπερφυὲς μηδὲν γενέσθαι τότε, μήτε τὸν Αἴαντα οὕτω μέγαν μήτε τὴν Ἑλένην αὐτὴν οὕτω καλὴν ὡς οἴονται. εἶδον γὰρ λευκὴν μέν τινα καὶ ἐπιμήκη τὸν τράχηλον, ὡς εἰκάζειν κύκνου θυγατέρα εἶναι, τἆλλα δὲ πάνυ πρεσβῦτιν, ἡλικιῶτιν σχεδὸν τῆς Ἑκάβης, ἥν γε Θησεὺς πρῶτον ἁρπάσας ἐν Ἀφίδναις εἶχε κατὰ τὸν Ἡρακλέα γενόμενος, ὁ δὲ Ἡρακλῆς πρότερον εἷλε Τροίαν κατὰ τοὺς πατέρας ἡμῶν τοὺς τότε μάλιστα. διηγεῖτο γάρ μοι ὁ Πάνθους ταῦτα, κομιδῇ μειράκιον ὢν ἑωρακέναι λέγων τὸν Ἡρακλέα.
MICYLLUS: But how about Achilles? Was he as Homer describes him, supreme in everything, or is this only a fable too?
Μίκυλλος: τί δέ; ὁ Ἀχιλλεὺς τοιοῦτος ἦν, ἄριστος τὰ πάντα, ἢ μῦθος ἄλλως καὶ ταῦτα;
COCK: I did not come into contact with him at all, Micyllus, and I can’t tell you as accurately about the Greek side. How could I, being one of the enemy? His comrade Patroclus, however, I killed without difficulty, running him through with my spear.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἐκείνῳ μὲν οὐδὲ συνηνέχθην, ὦ Μίκυλλε, οὐδʼ ἂν ἔχοιμί σοι οὕτως ἀκριβῶς τὰ παρὰ τοῖς Ἀχαιοῖς λέγειν· πόθεν γάρ, πολέμιος ὤν; τὸν μέντοι ἑταῖρον αὐτοῦ τὸν Πάτροκλον οὐ χαλεπῶς ἀπέκτεινα διελάσας τῷ δορατίῳ.
MICYLLUS: And then Menelaus killed you with much greater ease! But enough of this, and now tell me the story of Pythagoras.
Μίκυλλος: εἶτά σε ὁ Μενέλαος μακρῷ εὐχερέστερον. ἀλλὰ ταῦτα μὲν ἱκανῶς, τὰ Πυθαγόρου δὲ ἤδη λέγε.
18. COCK: In brief, Micyllus, I was a sophist, for I must tell the truth, I suppose. However, I was not uneducated or unacquainted with the noblest sciences. I even went to: Egypt to study with the prophets, penetrated into their sanctuaries and learned the books of Horus and Isis by heart, and then I sailed away to Italy and worked upon the Greeks in that quarter of the world to such an extent that they thought me a god.
18. Ἀλεκτρυών: τὸ μὲν ὅλον, ὦ Μίκυλλε, σοφιστὴς ἄνθρωπος ἦν· χρὴ γάρ, οἶμαι, τἀληθῆ λέγειν· ἄλλως δὲ οὐκ ἀπαίδευτος οὐδὲ ἀμελέτητος τῶν καλλίστων μαθημάτων· ἀπεδήμησα δὲ καὶ εἰς Αἴγυπτον, ὡς συγγενοίμην τοῖς προφήταις ἐπὶ σοφίᾳ, καὶ ἐς τὰ ἄδυτα κατελθὼν ἐξέμαθον τὰς βίβλους τὰς Ὥρου καὶ Ἴσιδος, καὶ αὖθις εἰς Ἰταλίαν ἐκπλεύσας οὕτω διέθηκα τοὺς κατʼ ἐκεῖνα Ἕλληνας, ὥστε θεὸν ἦγόν με.
MICYLLUS: So I have heard, and I have also heard that you were thought to have come to life again after dying, and that you once showed them that your thigh was of gold. But, look here, tell me how it occurred to you to make a law against eating either meat or beans?
Μίκυλλος: ἤκουσα ταῦτα καὶ ὡς δόξειας ἀναβεβιωκέναι ἀποθανὼν καὶ ὡς χρυσοῦν τὸν μηρὸν ἐπιδείξαιό ποτε αὐτοῖς. ἐκεῖνο δέ μοι εἰπέ, τί σοι ἐπῆλθε νόμον ποιήσασθαι μήτε κρεῶν μήτε κυάμων ἐσθίειν;
COCK: Do not press that question, Micyllus.
Ἀλεκτρυών: μὴ ἀνάκρινε ταῦτα, ὦ Μίκυλλε.
MICYLLUS: Why, cock? Cock Because I am ashamed to tell you the truth of it.
Μίκυλλος: διὰ τί, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών;Ἀλεκτρυών: ὅτι αἰσχύνομαι λέγειν πρὸς σὲ τὴν ἀλήθειαν περὶ αὐτῶν.
MICYLLUS: But you oughtn’t to hesitate to tell a housemate and a friend—for I cannot call myself your master any longer.
Μίκυλλος: καὶ μὴν οὐδὲν ὀκνεῖν χρὴ λέγειν πρὸς ἄνδρα σύνοικον καὶ φίλον· δεσπότην γὰρ οὐκ ἂν ἔτι εἴποιμι.
COCK: It was nothing sensible or wise, but I perceived that if I made laws that were ordinary and just like those of the run of legislators I should not induce men to wonder at me, whereas the more I departed from precedent, the more of a figure I should cut, I thought, in their eyes. Therefore I preferred to introduce innovations, keeping the reason for them secret so that one man might guess one thing and one another, and all be perplexed, as they are in the case of oracles that are obscure. Look here, you are laughing at me, now.
Ἀλεκτρυών: οὐδὲν ὑγιὲς οὐδὲ σοφὸν ἦν, ἀλλʼ ἑώρων ὅτι εἰ μὲν τὰ συνήθη καὶ ταὐτὰ τοῖς πολλοῖς νομίζοιμι, ἥκιστα ἐπισπάσομαι τοὺς ἀνθρώπους ἐς τὸ θαῦμα, ὅσῳ δʼ ἂν ξενίζοιμι, τοσούτῳ σεμνότερος ᾤμην αὐτοῖς ἔσεσθαι. διὰ τοῦτο καινοποιεῖν εἱλόμην ἀπόρρητον ποιησάμενος τὴν αἰτίαν, ὡς εἰκάζοντες ἄλλος ἄλλως ἅπαντες ἐκπλήττωνται καθάπερ ἐπὶ τοῖς ἀσαφέσι τῶν χρησμῶν. ὁρᾷς; καταγελᾷς μου καὶ σὺ ἐν τῷ μέρει.
MICYLLUS: Not so much at you as at the people of Croton and Metapontum and Tarentum and all the rest who followed you dumbly and worshipped the footprints that you left in walking.
Μίκυλλος: οὐ τοσοῦτον ὅσον Κροτωνιατῶν καὶ Μεταποντίνων καὶ Ταραντίνων καὶ τῶν ἄλλων ἀφώνων σοι ἑπομένων καὶ προσκυνούντων τὰ ἴχνη ἃ σὺ πατῶν ἀπολιμπάνοις.
19. MICYLLUS: But after you put off the part of Pythagoras what other did you assume?
19. Μίκυλλος: ἀποδυσάμενος δὲ τὸν Πυθαγόραν τίνα μετημφιέσω μετʼ αὐτόν;
COCK: Aspasia, the courtesan from Miletus.
Ἀλεκτρυών: Ἀσπασίαν τὴν ἐκ Μιλήτου ἑταίραν·
MICYLLUS: Whew, what a yarn! So Pythagoras became a woman on top of everything else, and there was once atime when you laid eggs, most distinguished of cocks; when you lived with Pericles in the capacity of Aspasia and had children by him and carded wool and spun yarn and made the most of your sex in courtesan style?
Μίκυλλος: φεῦ τοῦ λόγου, καὶ γυνὴ γὰρ σὺν τοῖς ἄλλοις ὁ Πυθαγόρας ἐγένετο, καὶ ἦν ποτε χρόνος ὅτε καὶ σὺ ᾠοτόκεις, ὦ ἀλεκτρυόνων γενναιότατε, καὶ συνῆσθα Περικλεῖ Ἀσπασία οὖσα καὶ ἐκύεις ἀπʼ αὐτοῦ καὶ ἔρια ἔξαινες καὶ κρόκην κατῆγες καὶ ἐγυναικίζου ἐς τὸ ἑταιρικόν;
COCK: Yes, I did all that, and I am not the only one: both Tiresias and Caeneus the son of Elatus preecded me, so that all your jokes at my expense will be at their expense too.
Ἀλεκτρυών: πάντα ταῦτα ἐποίουν οὐ μόνος, ἀλλὰ καὶ Τειρεσίας πρὸ ἐμοῦ καὶ ὁ Ἐλάτου παῖς ὁ Καινεύς, ὥστε ὁπόσα ἂν ἀποσκώψῃς εἰς ἐμὲ, καὶ εἰς ἐκείνους ἀποσκώψας ἔσῃ.
MICYLLUS: How about it? Which life did you find the pleasanter, when you were a man or when Pericles dallied with you?
Μίκυλλος: τί οὖν; πότερος ἡδίων ὁ βίος σοι ἦν, ὅτε ἀνὴρ ἦσθα ἢ ὅτε σε ὁ Περικλῆς ὤπυιεν;
COCK: Just see what a question you have asked there! Even Tiresias paid dearly for answering it!
Ἀλεκτρυών: ὁρᾷς οἷον τοῦτο ἠρώτησας, οὐδὲ τῷ Τειρεσίᾳ συνενεγκοῦσαν τὴν ἀπόκρισιν;
MICYLLUS: Whether you tell me or not, Euripides has settled the business well enough, for he says that he would sooner stand in line of battle thrice over than bear a single child.
Μίκυλλος: ἀλλὰ κἂν σὺ μὴ εἴπῃς, ἱκανῶς ὁ Εὐριπίδης διέκρινε τὸ τοιοῦτον, εἰπὼν ὡς τρὶς ἂν ἐθέλοι παρʼ ἀσπίδα στῆναι ἢ ἅπαξ τεκεῖν.
COCK: I'll remind you of that before long, Micyllus, when you are in child-bed; for you too will be a woman again and again in your long cycle of existences.
Ἀλεκτρυών: καὶ μὴν ἀναμνήσω σε, ὦ Μίκυλλε, οὐκ εἰς μακρὰν ὠδίνουσαν· ἔσῃ γὰρ γυνὴ καὶ σὺ ἐν πολλῇ τῇ περιόδῳ πολλάκις.
MICYLLUS: Hang you, cock, do you think everybody hails from Miletus or Samos? They say that while you were Pythagoras and young and handsome you often played Aspasia to the tyrant.
Μίκυλλος: οὐκ ἀπάγξῃ, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών, ἅπαντας οἰόμενος Μιλησίους ἢ Σαμίους εἶναι; σὲ γοῦν φασι καὶ Πυθαγόραν ὄντα τὴν ὥραν λαμπρὸν πολλάκις Ἀσπασίαν γενέσθαι τῷ τυράννῳ.
20. MICYLLUS: But what man or woman did you become after Aspasia?
20. Μίκυλλος: —τίς δὲ δὴ μετὰ τὴν Ἀσπασίαν ἀνὴρ ἢ γυνὴ αὖθις ἀνεφάνης;
COCK: The Cynic Crates.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ὁ κυνικὸς Κράτης.
MICYLLUS: Twin brethren! what ups and downs! First a courtesan, then a philosopher!
Μίκυλλος: Ὢ Διοσκόρω τῆς ἀνομοιότητος, ἐξ ἑταίρας φιλόσοφος.
COCK: Then a king, then a poor man, and soon a satrap; then a horse, a jackdaw, a frog, and a thousand things besides; it would take too long to enumerate them all. But of late I have often been a cock, for I liked that sort of life; and after belonging to many men, both rich and poor, at length I am now living with you, laughing at you every day for bewailing and lamenting over your poverty and for admiring the rich through ignorance of the troubles that are theirs. Indeed, if you knew the cares they have, you would laugh at yourself for thinking at_ first that wealth was a source of extraordinary happiness.
Ἀλεκτρυών: εἶτα βασιλεύς, εἶτα πένης, καὶ μετʼ ὀλίγον σατράπης, εἶτα ἵππος καὶ κολοιὸς καὶ βάτραχος καὶ ἄλλα μυρία· μακρὸν ἂν γένοιτο καταριθμήσασθαι ἕκαστα· τὰ τελευταῖα δὲ ἀλεκτρυὼν πολλάκις, ἥσθην γὰρ τῷ τοιούτῳ βίῳ. καὶ παρὰ πολλοῖς ἄλλοις δουλεύσας καὶ πένησι καὶ πλουσίοις, τὰ τελευταῖα καὶ σοὶ νῦν σύνειμι καταγελῶν ὁσημέραι ποτνιωμένου καὶ οἰμώζοντος ἐπὶ τῇ πενίᾳ καὶ τοὺς πλουσίους θαυμάζοντος ὑπʼ ἀγνοίας τῶν ἐκείνοις προσόντων κακῶν. εἰ γοῦν ᾔδεις τὰς φροντίδας ἃς ἔχουσιν, ἐγέλας ἂν ἐπὶ σαυτῷ πρῶτον οἰηθέντι ὑπερευδαίμονα εἶναι τὸν πλοῦτον.
MICYLLUS: Well then, Pythagoras—but tell me what you like best to be called, so that I may not muddle up our conversation by calling you different names.
Μίκυλλος: οὐκοῦν, ὦ Πυθαγόρα — καίτοι τί μάλιστα χαίρεις καλούμενος, ὡς μὴ ἐπιταράττοιμι τὸν λόγον ἄλλοτε ἄλλον καλῶν;
COCK: It will make no difference whether you call me Euphorbus or Pythagoras, Aspasia or Crates; I am all of them. But you had better call me what you now see me to be, a cock, so as not to slight a bird that, although held in low esteem, has in itself so many souls.
Ἀλεκτρυών: διοίσει μὲν οὐδὲν ἤν τε Εὔφορβον ἢ Πυθαγόραν, ἤν τε Ἀσπασίαν καλῇς ἢ Κράτητα· πάντα γὰρ ἐγὼ ταῦτά εἰμι. πλὴν τὸ νῦν ὁρώμενον τοῦτο ἀλεκτρυόνα ὀνομάζων ἄμεινον ἂν ποιοῖς, ὡς μὴ ἀτιμάζοις εὐτελὲς εἶναι δοκοῦν τὸ ὄρνεον, καὶ ταῦτα τοσαύτας ἐν αὑτῷ ψυχὰς ἔχον.
21. MICYLLUS: Well then, cock, as you have tried almost every existence and know everything, please tell me clearly about the life of the rich and the life of the poor, each by itself, so that I may learn if you are telling the truth when you declare that I am happier than the rich.
21. Μίκυλλος: οὐκοῦν, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών, ἐπειδὴ ἁπάντων σχεδὸν ἤδη τῶν βίων ἐπειράθης καὶ πάντα οἶσθα, λέγοις ἂν ἤδη σαφῶς ἰδίᾳ μὲν τὰ τῶν πλουσίων ὅπως βιοῦσιν, ἰδίᾳ δὲ τὰ πτωχικά, ὡς μάθω εἰ ἀληθῆ ταῦτα φὴς εὐδαιμονέστερον ἀποφαίνων με τῶν πλουσίων.
COCK: Well now, look at it this way, Micyllus. As for you, you are little concerned about war if you hear that the enemy is approaching, and you do not worry for fear they may lay your farm waste in a raid or trample down your garden or cut down your grapevines; when you hear the trumpet, at most you simply consider yourself and where you are to turn in order to save yourself and escape the danger. The rich, however, not only fear for themselves but are distressed when they look from the walls and see all that they own in the country harried and plundered. Moreover if it is necessary to pay a special tax, they alone are summoned to do so, and if it is necessary to take the field, they risk their lives in the van as commanders of horse or foot, whereas you, with but a wicker shield, have little to carry and nothing to impede your flight, and are ready to celebrate the victory when the general offers sacrifice after winning the battle.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἰδοὺ δὴ οὕτως ἐπίσκεψαι, ὦ Μίκυλλε· σοὶ μὲν οὔτε πολέμου πολὺς λόγος, ἢν λέγηται ὡς οἱ πολέμιοι προσελαύνουσιν, οὐδὲ φροντίζεις μὴ τὸν ἀγρὸν τέμωσιν ἐμβαλόντες ἢ τὸν παράδεισον συμπατήσωσιν ἢ τὰς ἀμπέλους δῃώσωσιν, ἀλλὰ τῆς σάλπιγγος ἀκούων μόνον, εἴπερ ἄρα, περιβλέπεις τὸ κατὰ σεαυτόν, οἷ τραπόμενον χρὴ σωθῆναι καὶ τὸν κίνδυνον διαφυγεῖν· οἱ δʼ εὐλαβοῦνται μὲν καὶ ἀμφʼ αὑτοῖς, ἀνιῶνται δὲ ὁρῶντες ἀπὸ τῶν τειχῶν ἀγόμενα καὶ φερόμενα ὅσα εἶχον ἐν τοῖς ἀγροῖς. καὶ ἤν τε εἰσφέρειν δέῃ, μόνοι καλοῦνται, ἤν τε ἐπεξιέναι, προκινδυνεύουσι στρατηγοῦντες ἢ ἱππαρχοῦντες· σὺ δὲ οἰσυΐνην ἀσπίδα ἔχων, εὐσταλὴς καὶ κοῦφος εἰς σωτηρίαν, ἕτοιμος ἑστιᾶσθαι τὰ ἐπινίκια, ἐπειδὰν θύῃ ὁ στρατηγὸς νενικηκώς.
22. COCK: In time of peace, on the other hand, being one of the voters, you go to the assembly and lord it over the rich while they quake and cringe and seck your good will with presents. Besides, it is they who toil that you may have baths and shows and everything else to your heart’s content, while you investigate and scrutinize them harshly like a master, sometimes without even letting them say a word for themselves; and if you choose you shower them generously with stones or confiscate their properties. And_ you do not dread an informer, nor yet a robber who might steal your gold by climbing over the coping or digging through the wall; and you are not bothered with casting up accounts or collecting debts or squabbling with your confounded agents, and thus dividing your attention among so many worries. No, after you have finished a sandal and received your pay of seven obols, you get up from your bench toward evening, take a bath if you choose, buy yourself a bloater or sprats or a bunch of onions, and have a good time, singing a great deal and philosophizing with that good soul, Poverty.
22. Ἀλεκτρυών: ἐν εἰρήνῃ τε αὖ σὺ μὲν τοῦ δήμου ὢν ἀναβὰς εἰς ἐκκλησίαν τυραννεῖς τῶν πλουσίων, οἱ δὲ φρίττουσι καὶ ὑποπτήσσουσι καὶ διανομαῖς ἱλάσκονταί σε. λουτρὰ μὲν γὰρ ὡς ἔχοις καὶ θεάματα καὶ τἆλλα διαρκῆ ἅπαντα, ἐκεῖνοι πονοῦσι, σὺ δὲ ἐξεταστὴς καὶ δοκιμαστὴς πικρὸς ὥσπερ δεσπότης, οὐδὲ λόγου μεταδιδοὺς ἐνίοτε, κἄν σοι δοκῇ κατεχαλάζησας αὐτῶν ἀφθόνους τοὺς λίθους ἢ τὰς οὐσίας αὐτῶν ἐδήμευσας· οὔτε δὲ συκοφάντην δέδιας αὐτὸς οὔτε λῃστὴν μὴ ὑφέληται τὸ χρυσίον ὑπερβὰς τὸ θριγκίον ἢ διορύξας τὸν τοῖχον, οὔτε πράγματα ἔχεις λογιζόμενος ἢ ἀπαιτῶν ἢ τοῖς καταράτοις οἰκονόμοις διαπυκτεύων καὶ πρὸς τοσαύτας φροντίδας μεριζόμενος, ἀλλὰ κρηπῖδα συντελέσας ἑπτὰ ὀβολοὺς τὸν μισθὸν ἔχων, ἀπαναστὰς περὶ δείλην ὀψίαν λουσάμενος, ἢν δοκῇ, σαπέρδην τινὰ ἢ μαινίδας ἢ κρομμύων κεφαλίδας ὀλίγας πριάμενος εὐφραίνεις σεαυτὸν ᾄδων τὰ πολλὰ καὶ τῇ βελτίστῃ Πενίᾳ προσφιλοσοφῶν.
23. COCK: So in consequence of all this you are sound and strong in body and can stand the cold, for your hardships have trained you fine and made you no mean fighter against adverse conditions that scem to the rest of the world irresistible. No chance that one of their severe illnesses will come near you: on the contrary, if ever you get a light fever, after humouring it a little while you jump out of bed at once, shaking off your discomfort, and the fever takes flight immediately on seeing that you drink cold water and have no use for doctors’ visits. But the rich, unhappy that they are—what ills are they not subject to through intemperance? Gout and consumption and pneumonia and dropsy are the consequences of those splendid dinners. In brief, some of them who like Icarus fly high and draw near the sun without knowing that their wings are fitted on with wax, now and then make a great splash by falling head-first into the sea, while of those who, copying Daedalus, have not let their ambitions soar high in the air but have kept them close to earth so that the wax is occasionally wet with spray, the most part reach their journey’s end in safety.
23. Ἀλεκτρυών: ὥστε διὰ ταῦτα ὑγιαίνεις τε καὶ ἔρρωσαι τὸ σῶμα καὶ διακαρτερεῖς πρὸς τὸ κρύος· οἱ πόνοι γάρ σε παραθήγοντες οὐκ εὐκαταφρόνητον ἀνταγωνιστὴν ἀποφαίνουσι πρὸς τὰ δοκοῦντα τοῖς ἄλλοις ἄμαχα εἶναι. ἀμέλει οὐδέν σοι τῶν χαλεπῶν τούτων νοσημάτων πρόσεισιν, ἀλλʼ ἤν ποτε κοῦφος πυρετὸς ἐπιλάβηται, πρὸς ὀλίγον ὑπηρετήσας αὐτῷ ἀνεπήδησας εὐθὺς ἀποσεισάμενος τὴν ἄσην, ὁ δὲ φεύγει αὐτίκα φοβηθείς, ψυχροῦ σε ὁρῶν ἐμφορούμενον καὶ μακρὰ οἰμώζειν λέγοντα ταῖς ἰατρικαῖς περιόδοις· οἱ δὲ ὑπʼ ἀκρασίας ἄθλιοι τί τῶν κακῶν οὐκ ἔχουσι, ποδάγρας καὶ φθόας καὶ περιπλευμονίας καὶ ὑδέρους; αὗται γὰρ τῶν πολυτελῶν ἐκείνων δείπνων ἀπόγονοι. τοιγαροῦν οἱ μὲν αὐτῶν ὥσπερ ὁ Ἴκαρος ἐπὶ πολὺ ἄραντες αὑτοὺς καὶ πλησιάσαντες τῷ ἡλίῳ οὐκ εἰδότες ὅτι κηρῷ ἥρμοστο αὐτοῖς ἡ πτέρωσις, μέγαν ἐνίοτε τὸν πάταγον ἐποίησαν ἐπὶ κεφαλὴν ἐς πέλαγος ἐμπεσόντες· ὅσοι δὲ κατὰ τὸν Δαίδαλον μὴ πάνυ μετέωρα μηδὲ ὑψηλὰ ἐφρόνησαν ἀλλὰ πρόσγεια, ὡς νοτίζεσθαι ἐνίοτε τῇ ἅλμῃ τὸν κηρόν, ὡς τὸ πολὺ οὗτοι ἀσφαλῶς διέπτησαν.
MICYLLUS: You mean temperate and sensible people.
Μίκυλλος: ἐπιεικεῖς τινας καὶ συνετοὺς λέγεις.
COCK: But as for the others, Micyllus, you can see how sadly they come to grief when a Croesus with his wings clipped makes sport for the Persians by mounting the pyre, or a Dionysius, expelled from his tyrant’s throne, turns up in Corinth as a schoolmaster, teaching children their a, b—ab, after holding sway so widely.
Ἀλεκτρυών: τῶν μέντοι γε ἄλλων, ὦ Μίκυλλε, τὰς ναυαγίας αἰσχρὰς ἴδοις ἄν, ὅταν ὁ Κροῖσος περιτετιλμένος τὰ πτερὰ γέλωτα παρέχῃ Πέρσαις ἀναβαίνων ἐπὶ τὴν πυρὰν ἢ Διονύσιος καταλυθεὶς τῆς τυραννίδος ἐν Κορίνθῳ γραμματιστὴς βλέπηται, μετὰ τηλικαύτην ἀρχὴν παιδία συλλαβίζειν διδάσκων.
24. MICYLLUS: Tell me, cock, when you were king—for you say you were once on a time—how did you find that life? You were completely happy, I suppose, as you had what is surely the acme of all blessings.
24. Μίκυλλος: εἰπέ μοι, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών, σὺ δὲ ὁπότε βασιλεὺς ἦσθα — φὴς γὰρ καὶ βασιλεῦσαί ποτε — ποίου τινὸς ἐπειράθης ἐκείνου τοῦ βίου; ἦ που πανευδαίμων ἦσθα, τὸ κεφάλαιον ὅ τι πέρ ἐστι τῶν ἀγαθῶν ἁπάντων ἔχων;
COCK: Don’t even remind me of it, Micyllus, so utterly wretched was I then; for although in all things external I seemed to be completely happy, as you say, I had a thousand vexations within.
Ἀλεκτρυών: μηδὲ ἀναμνήσῃς με, ὦ Μίκυλλε, οὕτω τρισάθλιος ἦν τότε, τοῖς μὲν ἔξω πᾶσιν ὅπερ ἔφησθα πανευδαίμων εἶναι δοκῶν, ἔνδοθεν δὲ μυρίαις ἀνίαις συνών.
MICYLLUS: What were they? What you say is strange and not quite credible.
Μίκυλλος: τίσι ταύταις; παράδοξα γὰρ καὶ οὐ πάνυ τι πιστὰ φής.
COCK: I ruled over a great country, Micyllus, one that roduced everything and was among the most noteworthy for the number of its people and the beauty of its cities, one that was traversed by navigable rivers and had a sea-coast with good harbours; and I had a great army, trained cavalry, a large bodyguard, triremes, untold riches, a great quantity of gold plate and all the rest of the paraphernalia of rule enormously exaggerated, so that when I went out the people made obeisance and thought they beheld a god inthe flesh, and they ran up one after another to look at me, while some even went up to the house-tops, thinking it a great thing to have had a good look at my horses, my mantle, my diadem, and my attendants before and behind me. But I myself, knowing how many vexations and torments I had, pardoned them, to be sure, for their folly, but pitied myself for being no better than the great colossi that Phidias or Myron or Praxiteles made, each of which outwardly is a beautiful Poseidon or a Zeus, made of ivory and gold, with a thunderbolt ora flash of lightning or a trident in his right hand; but if you stoop down and look inside, you will see bars and props and nails driven clear through, and beams and wedges and pitch and clay and a quantity of such ugly stuff housing within, not to mention numbers of mice and rats that keep their court in them sometimes. That is what monarchy is like.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἦρχον μὲν οὐκ ὀλίγης χώρας, ὦ Μίκυλλε, παμφόρου τινὸς καὶ πλήθει ἀνθρώπων καὶ κάλλει πόλεων ἐν ταῖς μάλιστα θαυμάζεσθαι ἀξίας ποταμοῖς τε ναυσιπόροις καταρρεομένης καὶ θαλάττῃ εὐόρμῳ χρωμένης, καὶ στρατιὰ ἦν πολλὴ καὶ ἵππος συγκεκροτημένη καὶ δορυφορικὸν οὐκ ὀλίγον καὶ τριήρεις καὶ χρημάτων πλῆθος ἀνάριθμον καὶ χρυσὸς πάμπολυς καὶ ἡ ἄλλη τῆς ἀρχῆς τραγῳδία πᾶσα ἐς ὑπερβολὴν ἐξωγκωμένη, ὥστε ὁπότε προΐοιμι, οἱ μὲν πολλοὶ προσεκύνουν καὶ θεόν τινα ὁρᾶν ᾤοντο καὶ ἄλλοι ἐπʼ ἄλλοις συνέθεον ὀψόμενοί με, οἱ δὲ καὶ ἐπὶ τὰ τέγη ἀνιόντες ἐν μεγάλῳ ἐτίθεντο ἀκριβῶς ἑωρακέναι τὸ ζεῦγος, τὴν ἐφεστρίδα, τὸ διάδημα, τοὺς προπομπεύοντας, τοὺς ἑπομένους. ἐγὼ δὲ εἰδὼς ὁπόσα με ἠνία καὶ ἔστρεφεν, ἐκείνοις μὲν τῆς ἀνοίας συνεγίνωσκον, ἐμαυτὸν δὲ ἠλέουν ὅμοιον ὄντα τοῖς μεγάλοις ἐκείνοις κολοσσοῖς, οἵους ἢ Φειδίας ἢ Μύρων ἢ Πραξιτέλης ἐποίησεν· κἀκείνων γὰρ ἕκαστος ἔκτοσθεν μὲν Ποσειδῶν τις ἢ Ζεύς ἐστι πάγκαλος ἐκ χρυσίου καὶ ἐλέφαντος συνειργασμένος, κεραυνὸν ἢ ἀστραπὴν ἢ τρίαιναν ἔχων ἐν τῇ δεξιᾷ, ἢν δὲ ὑποκύψας ἴδῃς τά γʼ ἔνδον, ὄψει μοχλούς τινας καὶ γόμφους καὶ ἥλους διαμπὰξ πεπερονημένους καὶ κορμοὺς καὶ σφῆνας καὶ πίτταν καὶ πηλὸν καὶ τοιαύτην τινὰ πολλὴν ἀμορφίαν ὑποικουροῦσαν· ἐῶ λέγειν μυῶν πλῆθος ἢ μυγαλῶν ἐμπολιτευόμενον αὐτοῖς ἐνίοτε. τοιοῦτόν τι καὶ βασιλεία ἐστίν.
25. MICYLLUS: You haven’t yet told me what the clay and the props and bars are in monarchy, nor what that “quantity of ugly stuff” is. [ll grant you, to drive out as the ruler of so many people amid admiration and homage is wonderfully like your comparison of the colossus, for it savours of divinity. But tell me about the inside of the colossus now.
25. Μίκυλλος: οὐδέπω ἔφησθα τὸν πηλὸν καὶ τοὺς γόμφους καὶ μοχλοὺς οἵτινες εἶεν τῆς ἀρχῆς, οὐδὲ τὴν ἀμορφίαν ἐκείνην τὴν πολλὴν ἥτις ἐστίν· ὡς τό γε ἐξελαύνειν ἀποβλεπόμενον καὶ τοσούτων ἄρχοντα καὶ προσκυνούμενον δαιμονίως ἔοικέ σου τῷ κολοσσιαίῳ παραδείγματι· θεσπέσιον γάρ τι καὶ τοῦτο. σὺ δὲ τὰ ἔνδον ἤδη τοῦ κολοσσοῦ λέγε.
COCK: What shall I tell you first, Micyllus? The terrors, the frights, the suspicions, the hatred of your associates, the plots, and as a result of all this the seanty sleep, and that not sound, the dreams full of tumult, the intricate plans and the perpetual expectations of something bad? Or shall I tell you of the press of business, negotiations, lawsuits, campaigns, orders, countersigns, and calculations? These things prevent a ruler from enjoying any pleasure even in his sleep; he alone must think about everything and have a thousand worries. Even in the case of Agamemnon, son of Atreus,Sweet sleep came to him not as he weighed in his mind many projects,though all the Achaeans were snoring! The king of Lydia is worried because his son is mute, the king of Persia because Clearchus is enlisting troops for Cyrus, another because Dion is holding whispered conversations with a few Syracusans, another because Parmenio is praised, Perdiccas because of Ptolemy, and Ptolemy because of Seleucus. And there are other grounds for worry too, when your favourite will have nothing to do with you except by constraint, when your mistress fancies someone else, when one or another is said to be on the point of revolting, and when two or three of your guardsmen are whispering to one another. What is more, you must be particularly suspicious of your dearest friends and always be expecting some harm to come from them. For example, I was poisoned by my son, he himself by his favourite, and the latter no doubt met some other death of a similar sort.
Ἀλεκτρυών: τί πρῶτον εἴπω σοι, ὦ Μίκυλλε; τοὺς φόβους καὶ τὰ δείματα καὶ ὑποψίας καὶ μῖσος τὸ παρὰ τῶν συνόντων καὶ ἐπιβουλάς, καὶ διὰ ταῦτα ὕπνον τε ὀλίγον, ἐπιπόλαιον κἀκεῖνον, καὶ ταραχῆς μεστὰ ὀνείρατα καὶ ἐννοίας πολυπλόκους καὶ ἐλπίδας ἀεὶ πονηράς, ἢ τὴν ἀσχολίαν καὶ χρηματισμοὺς καὶ δίκας καὶ ἐκστρατείας καὶ προστάγματα καὶ συνθήματα καὶ λογισμούς; ὑφʼ ὧν οὐδὲ ὄναρ ἀπολαῦσαί τινος ἡδέος ἐγγίνεται, ἀλλʼ ἀνάγκη ὑπὲρ ἁπάντων μόνον διασκοπεῖσθαι καὶ μυρία ἔχειν πράγματα·οὐδὲ γὰρ Ἀτρείδην Ἀγαμέμνοναὕπνος ἔχε γλυκερὸς πολλὰ φρεσὶν ὁρμαίνοντα,καὶ ταῦτα ῥεγκόντων Ἀχαιῶν ἁπάντων. λυπεῖ δὲ τὸν μὲν Λυδὸν υἱὸς κωφὸς ὤν, τὸν Πέρσην δὲ Κλέαρχος Κύρῳ ξενολογῶν, ἄλλον δὲ Δίων πρὸς οὖς τισι τῶν Συρακουσίων κοινολογούμενος, καὶ ἄλλον Παρμενίων ἐπαινούμενος καὶ Περδίκκαν Πτολεμαῖος καὶ Πτολεμαῖον Σέλευκος· ἀλλὰ κἀκεῖνα λυπεῖ, ὁ ἐρώμενος πρὸς ἀνάγκην συνὼν καὶ παλλακὶς ἄλλῳ χαίρουσα καὶ ἀποστήσεσθαί τινες λεγόμενοι καὶ δύʼ ἢ τέτταρες τῶν δορυφόρων πρὸς ἀλλήλους διαψιθυρίζοντες. τὸ δὲ μέγιστον, ὑφορᾶσθαι δεῖ μάλιστα τοὺς φιλτάτους κἀξ ἐκείνων ἀεί τι δεινὸν ἐλπίζειν ἥξειν. ἐγὼ γοῦν ὑπὸ τοῦ παιδὸς ἀπέθανον ἐκ φαρμάκων, ὁ δὲ καὶ αὐτὸς ὑπὸ τοῦ ἐρωμένου, τὸν δὲ ἄλλος ἴσως ὁμοιότροπος θάνατος κατέλαβεν.
26. MICYLLUS: Tut, tut! What you say is dreadful, cock. For me, at least, it is far safer to bend over and cobble shoes than to drink out of a golden cup when the health that is pledged you is qualified with hemlock or aconite. The only risk I run is that if my knife should slip sideways and fail to cut straight, I might draw a little blood by cutting my fingers; but they, as you say, do their feasting at the peril of their lives and live amid a thousand ills beside. Then when they fall they make no better figure than the actors that you often see, who for a time pretend to be a Cecrops or a Sisyphus or a Telephus, with diadems and ivory-hilted swords and waving hair and gold-embroidered tunics; but if (as often happens) one of them misses his footing and falls down in the middle of the stage, it naturally makes fun for the audience when the mask gets broken to pieces, diadem and all, and the actor’s own face is covered with blood, and his legs are bared high, so as to show that his inner garments are miserable rags and that the buskins with which he is shod are shapeless and do not fit his foot. Do you see how you have already taught me to make comparisons, friend cock? Well, as for absolute power, it proves to be something of that sort. But when you became a horse or a dog or a fish or a frog, how did you find that existence?
26. Μίκυλλος: ἄπαγε, δεινὰ ταῦτα φής, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών. ἐμοὶ γοῦν πολὺ ἀσφαλέστερον σκυτοτομεῖν ἐπικεκυφότα ἢ πίνειν ἀπὸ χρυσῆς φιάλης κωνείῳ ἢ ἀκονίτῳ συνανακραθεῖσαν φιλοτησίαν· ὁ γοῦν κίνδυνος ἐμοὶ μέν, εἰ παρολίσθοι τὸ σμιλίον καὶ ἁμάρτοι τῆς τομῆς τῆς ἐπʼ εὐθύ, ὀλίγον τι αἱμάξαι τοὺς δακτύλους ἐντεμόντα· οἱ δέ, ὡς φής, θανάσιμα εὐωχοῦνται, καὶ ταῦτα μυρίοις κακοῖς συνόντες. εἶτʼ ἐπειδὰν πέσωσιν, ὅμοιοι μάλιστα φαίνονται τοῖς τραγικοῖς ὑποκριταῖς, ὧν πολλοὺς ἰδεῖν ἔνεστι τέως μὲν Κέκροπας δῆθεν ὄντας ἢ Σισύφους ἢ Τηλέφους, διαδήματα ἔχοντας καὶ ξίφη ἐλεφαντόκωπα καὶ ἐπίσειστον κόμην καὶ χλαμύδα χρυσόπαστον, ἢν δέ, οἷα πολλὰ γίνεται, κενεμβατήσας τις αὐτῶν ἐν μέσῃ τῇ σκηνῇ καταπέσῃ, γέλωτα δηλαδὴ παρέχει τοῖς θεαταῖς τοῦ προσωπείου μὲν συντριβέντος αὐτῷ διαδήματι, ᾑμαγμένης δὲ τῆς ἀληθοῦς κεφαλῆς τοῦ ὑποκριτοῦ καὶ τῶν σκελῶν ἐπὶ πολὺ γυμνουμένων, ὡς τῆς τε ἐσθῆτος τὰ ἔνδοθεν φαίνεσθαι ῥάκια δύστηνα ὄντα καὶ τῶν ἐμβατῶν τὴν ὑπόδεσιν ἀμορφοτάτην καὶ οὐχὶ κατὰ λόγον τοῦ ποδός. ὁρᾷς ὅπως με καὶ εἰκάζειν ἐδίδαξας ἤδη, ὦ βέλτιστε ἀλεκτρυών; ἀλλὰ τυραννὶς μὲν τοιοῦτόν τι ὤφθη οὖσα. ἵππος δὲ ἢ κύων ἢ ἰχθὺς ἢ βάτραχος ὁπότε γένοιο, πῶς ἔφερες ἐκείνην τὴν διατριβήν;
27. COCK: That is a long story you are starting, and we have not time for it just now. But to give the upshot of it, there is no existence that did not seem to me more care-free than that of man, since the others are con- ‘formed to natural desires and needs alone; you will not see among them a horse bailiff or a frog informer or a jackdaw sophist or a mosquito chef or a libertine cock or any of the other modes of life that you men follow.
27. Ἀλεκτρυών: μακρὸν τοῦτον ἀνακινεῖς τὸν λόγον καὶ οὐ τοῦ παρόντος καιροῦ· πλὴν τό γε κεφάλαιον, οὐδεὶς ὅστις οὐκ ἀπραγμονέστερος τῶν βίων ἔδοξέ μοι τοῦ ἀνθρωπείου, μόναις ταῖς φυσικαῖς ἐπιθυμίαις καὶ χρείαις συμμεμετρημένος· τελώνην δὲ ἵππον ἢ συκοφάντην βάτραχον ἢ σοφιστὴν κολοιὸν ἢ ὀψοποιὸν κώνωπα ἢ κίναιδον ἀλεκτρυόνα καὶ τἆλλα ὅσα ὑμεῖς ἐπιτηδεύετε, οὐκ ἂν ἴδοις ἐν ἐκείνοις.
28. MICYLLUS: No doubt that is true, cock. But as to myself, I am not ashamed to tell you how I feel. I am not yet able to unlearn the desire of becoming rich that [have had since my boyhood. My dream, too, still stands before my eyes displaying its gold; and above all I am choking with envy of that confounded Simon, who is revelling in so many blessings.
28. Μίκυλλος: ἀληθῆ ἴσως ταῦτα, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών. ἐγὼ δὲ ὃ πέπονθα οὐκ αἰσχύνομαι πρὸς σὲ εἰπεῖν· οὐδέπω δύναμαι ἀπομαθεῖν τὴν ἐπιθυμίαν ἣν ἐκ παίδων εἶχον πλούσιος γενέσθαι, ἀλλὰ μὴν καὶ τοὐνύπνιον ἔτι πρὸ τῶν ὀφθαλμῶν ἕστηκεν ἐπιδεικνύμενον τὸ χρυσίον, καὶ μάλιστα ἐπὶ τῷ καταράτῳ Σίμωνι ἀποπνίγομαι τρυφῶντι ἐν ἀγαθοῖς τοσούτοις.
COCK: I will cure you, Micyllus. As it is still night, get up and follow me; I will take you to visit Simon and to the house of the other rich men, so that you may see what their establishments are like.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἐγώ σε ἰάσομαι, ὦ Μίκυλλε· καὶ ἐπείπερ ἔτι νύξ ἐστιν, ἐξαναστὰς ἕπου μοι· ἀπάξω γάρ σε παρʼ αὐτὸν ἐκεῖνον τὸν Σίμωνα καὶ εἰς τὰς τῶν ἄλλων πλουσίων οἰκίας. ὡς ἴδοις οἷα τὰ παρʼ αὐτοῖς ἐστι.
MICYLLUS: How can you do it when their doors are locked? You aren't going to make me be a burglar?
Μίκυλλος: πῶς τοῦτο, κεκλεισμένων τῶν θυρῶν; εἰ μὴ καὶ τοιχωρυχεῖν γε σύ με ἀναγκάσεις.
COCK: Not by any means. But Hermes, to whom IT am consecrated, gave me this privilege, that if my longest tail feather, the one that is so pliant that it curls— MICYLLUS: You have two like that.
Ἀλεκτρυών: οὐδαμῶς, ἀλλʼ ὁ Ἑρμῆς, οὗπερ ἱερός εἰμι, ἐξαίρετον ἔδωκέ μοι τοῦτο, ἤν τις τὸ οὐραῖον πτερὸν τὸ μήκιστον, ὃ διʼ ἁπαλότητα ἐπικαμπές ἐστι — Μίκυλλος: δύο δʼ ἔστι σοι τοιαῦτα.
COCK: It is the one on the right, and if I permit any man to pull it out and keep it, that man, as long as I choose, can open every door and see everything without being seen himself.
Ἀλεκτρυών: τὸ δεξιὸν τοίνυν ὅτῳ ἂν ἐγὼ ἀποσπάσαι παράσχω καὶ ἔχειν, ἐς ὅσον ἂν βούλωμαι ἀνοίγειν τε ὁ τοιοῦτος πᾶσαν θύραν δύναται καὶ ὁρᾶν ἅπαντα οὐχ ὁρώμενος αὐτός.
MICYLLUS: I didn’t realize, cock, that you yourself were a conjurer. Well, if you only let me have it, you shall see all Simon’s possessions brought over here in a jiffy: Pl slip in and bring them over, and he will once more eat his leather as he stretches it.
Μίκυλλος: ἐλελήθεις με, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών, καὶ σὺ γόης ὤν. ἐμοὶ δʼ οὖν ἢν τοῦτο ἅπαξ παράσχῃς, ὄψει τὰ Σίμωνος πάντα ἐν βραχεῖ δεῦρο μετενηνεγμένα· μετοίσω γὰρ αὐτὰ παρεισελθών, ὁ δὲ αὖθις περιτρώξεται ἀποτείνων τὰ καττύματα.
COCK: That is impossible, for Hermes ordered me, if the man who had the feather did anything of that sort, to uplift my voice and expose him.
Ἀλεκτρυών: οὐ θέμις γενέσθαι τοῦτο· παρήγγειλε γὰρ ὁ Ἑρμῆς, ἤν τι τοιοῦτον ἐργάσηται ὁ ἔχων τὸ πτερόν, ἀναβοήσαντά με καταφωρᾶσαι αὐτόν.
MICYLLUS: It is hard to believe what you say, that Hermes, himself a thief, begrudges others the same privilege. But let’s be off just the same; I'll keep my hands off the gold if I can.
Μίκυλλος: ἀπίθανον λέγεις, κλέπτην τὸν Ἑρμῆν αὐτὸν ὄντα τοῖς ἄλλοις φθονεῖν τοῦ τοιούτου. ἀπίωμεν δʼ ὅμως· ἀφέξομαι γὰρ τοῦ χρυσίου, ἢν δύνωμαι.
COCK: First pluck the feather out, Micyllus... What's this? You have pulled them both out!
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἀπότιλον, ὦ Μίκυλλε, πρότερον τὸ πτίλον … τί τοῦτο; ἄμφω ἀπέτιλας.
MICYLLUS: It is safer to do so, cock, and it will spoil your beauty less, preventing you from being crippled on one side of your tail.
Μίκυλλος: ἀσφαλέστερον οὕτως, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών, καὶ σοὶ ἧττον ἂν ἄμορφον τὸ πρᾶγμα εἴη, ὡς μὴ χωλεύοις διὰ θάτερον τῆς οὐρᾶς μέρος.
29. COCK: All right. Shall we visit Simon first, or one of the other rich men?
29. Ἀλεκτρυών: εἶεν. ἐπὶ τὸν Σίμωνα πρῶτον ἄπιμεν ἢ παρʼ ἄλλον τινὰ τῶν πλουσίων;
MICYLLUS: No: Simon, who wants to have a name of four syllables instead of two, now that he is rich. Here we are at the door already. What shall I do next?
Μίκυλλος: οὐ μὲν οὖν, ἀλλὰ παρὰ τὸν Σίμωνα, ὃς ἀντὶ δισυλλάβου τετρασύλλαβος ἤδη πλουτήσας εἶναι ἀξιοῖ. καὶ δὴ πάρεσμεν ἐπὶ τὰς θύρας. τί οὖν ποιῶ τὸ μετὰ τοῦτο;
COCK: Put the feather to the lock.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἐπίθες τὸ πτερὸν ἐπὶ τὸ κλεῖθρον.
MICYLLUS: Look at that now! Heracles! The door has opened just as it would toa key!
Μίκυλλος: ἰδοὺ δή. ὦ Ἡράκλεις, ἀναπέπταται ὥσπερ ὑπὸ κλειδὶ ἡ θύρα.
COCK: Lead on. Do you see him sitting up and figuring?
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἡγοῦ ἐς τὸ πρόσθεν. ὁρᾷς αὐτὸν ἀγρυπνοῦντα καὶ λογιζόμενον;
MICYLLUS: Yes, by Heaven, beside a dim and thirsty lamp; he is pale for some reason, cock, and all run down and thin; from worrying, I suppose, for there was no talk of his being ill in any other way.
Μίκυλλος: ὁρῶ νὴ Δία πρὸς ἀμαυράν γε καὶ διψῶσαν τὴν θρυαλλίδα, καὶ ὠχρὸς δὲ ἐστὶν οὐκ οἶδʼ ὅθεν, ἀλεκτρυών, καὶ κατέσκληκεν ὅλος ἐκτετηκώς, ὑπὸ φροντίδων δηλαδή· οὐ γὰρ νοσεῖν ἄλλως ἐλέγετο.
COCK: Listen to what he is saying and you will find out how he got this way. SIMON: Well, then, that seventy talents is quite safely buried under the bed and no one else knows of it; but as for the sixteen, I think Sosylus the groom saw me hiding them under the manger. At any rate he is all for hanging about the stable, though he is not particularly attentive to business otherwise or fond of work. I have probably been robbed of much more than that, or else where did Tibius get the money for the big slice of salt fish they said he treated himself to yesterday or the earring they said he bought for his wife at a cost of five whole drachmas?_ It’s my money these fellows are squandering, worse luck! But my cups are not stored in a safe place, either, and there are so many! I’m afraid someone may burrow under the wall and steal them: many envy me and plot against me, and above all my neighbour Micyllus.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἄκουσον ἅ φησιν· εἴσῃ γὰρ ὅθεν οὕτως ἔχει. Σίμων: οὐκοῦν τάλαντα μὲν ἑβδομήκοντα ἐκεῖνα πάνυ ἀσφαλῶς ὑπὸ τῇ κλίνῃ κατορώρυκται καὶ οὐδεὶς ἄλλος οἶδε, τὰ δὲ ἑκκαίδεκα εἶδεν, οἶμαι, Σωσύλος ὁ ἱπποκόμος ὑπὸ τῇ φάτνῃ κατακρύπτοντά με· ὅλος γοῦν περὶ τὸν ἱππῶνά ἐστιν, οὐ πάνυ ἐπιμελὴς ἄλλως οὐδὲ φιλόπονος ὤν. εἰκὸς δὲ ἡρπάσθαι πολλῷ πλείω τούτων, ἢ πόθεν γὰρ ὁ Τίβειος τάριχος αὑτῷ οὕτω μέγα ὠψωνηκέναι χθὲς ἐλέγετο ἢ τῇ γυναικὶ ἐλλόβιον ἐωνῆσθαι πέντε δραχμῶν ὅλων; τἀμὰ οὗτοι σπαθῶσι τοῦ κακοδαίμονος. ἀλλʼ οὐδὲ τὰ ἐκπώματα ἐν ἀσφαλεῖ μοι ἀπόκειται τοσαῦτα ὄντα· δέδια γοῦν μή τις ὑπορύξας τὸν τοῖχον ὑφέληται αὐτά· πολλοὶ φθονοῦσι καὶ ἐπιβουλεύουσί μοι, καὶ μάλιστα ὁ γείτων Μίκυλλος.
MICYLLUS: Yes, by Heaven, I’m just like you and go away with the dishes under my arm!
Μίκυλλος: νὴ Δία· σοὶ γὰρ ὅμοιος ἐγὼ καὶ τὰ τρύβλια ὑπὸ μάλης ἄπειμι ἔχων.
COCK: Hush, Micyllus, for fear he may find out that we are here. SIMON: At any rate it is best to stay awake myself and keep watch. I'll get up from time to time and go all about the whole house. Who is that? I see you, burglar... oh! no, you are only a pillar, it is allright. Ill dig up my gold and count it again, for fear I made a mistake yesterday. There, now, somebody made a noise: he’s after me, of course. I am beleaguered and plotted against by all the world. Where is my sword? If I find anyone... Let us bury the gold again.
Ἀλεκτρυών: σιώπησον, Μίκυλλε, μὴ καταφωράσῃ παρόντας ἡμᾶς. Σίμων: ἄριστον γοῦν ἄγρυπνον αὐτὸν φυλάττειν· ἅπασαν περίειμι διαναστὰς ἐν κύκλῳ τὴν οἰκίαν. τίς οὗτος; ὁρῶ σέ γε, τοιχωρύχε … μὰ Δία, ἐπεὶ κίων γε ὢν τυγχάνεις, εὖ ἔχει. ἀριθμήσω αὖθις ἀνορύξας τὸ χρυσίον, μή τί με πρῴην διέλαθεν. ἰδοὺ πάλιν ἐψόφηκέ τις· ἐπʼ ἐμὲ δηλαδή· πολιορκοῦμαι καὶ ἐπιβουλεύομαι πρὸς ἁπάντων. ποῦ μοι τὸ ξιφίδιον; ἂν λάβω τινά … θάπτωμεν αὖθις τὸ χρυσίον.
30. COCK: Well, Micyllus, that is the way Simon lives. Let’s o and visit someone else while there is still a little of the night left.
30. Ἀλεκτρυών: τοιαῦτα μέν σοι, ὦ Μίκυλλε, τὰ Σίμωνος. ἀπίωμεν δὲ καὶ παρʼ ἄλλον τινά, ἕως ἔτι ὀλίγον τῆς νυκτὸς λοιπόν ἐστιν.
MICYLLUS: Unfortunate man, what a life he leads! I wish my enemies wealth on those terms! Well, I want to hit him over the head before I go. SIMON: Who hit me? I’m being robbed, unlucky that I am!
Μίκυλλος: ὁ κακοδαίμων, οἷον βιοῖ τὸν βίον. ἐχθροῖς οὕτω πλουτεῖν γένοιτο. κατὰ κόρρης δʼ οὖν πατάξας αὐτὸν ἀπελθεῖν βούλομαι. Σίμων: τίς ἐπάταξέ με; λῃστεύομαι ὁ δυστυχής.
MICYLLUS: Groan and lie awake and grow like your gold in colour, cleaving fast to it! Let’s go and see Gnipho the money-lender, if you don’t mind. He too lives not far off. This door has opened to us also.
Μίκυλλος: οἴμωζε καὶ ἀγρύπνει καὶ ὅμοιος γίγνου τὸ χρῶμα τῷ χρυσῷ προστετηκὼς αὐτῷ. ἡμεῖς δὲ παρὰ Γνίφωνα, εἰ δοκεῖ, τὸν δανειστὴν ἴωμεν. οὐ μακρὰν δὲ καὶ οὗτος οἰκεῖ. ἀνέῳγε καὶ αὕτη ἡμῖν ἡ θύρα.
31. COCK: Do you see him awake with his worries like the other, computing his interests and wearing his fingers tothe bone? And yet he will soon have to leave all this behind and become a beetle or a gnat or a dogfly.
31. Ἀλεκτρυών: ὁρᾷς ἐπαγρυπνοῦντα καὶ τοῦτον ἐπὶ φροντίδων, ἀναλογιζόμενον τοὺς τόκους καὶ τοὺς δακτύλους κατεσκληκότα, ὃν δεήσει μετʼ ὀλίγον πάντα ταῦτα καταλιπόντα σίλφην ἢ ἐμπίδα ἢ κυνόμυιαν γενέσθαι;
MICYLLUS: I see an unfortunate, senseless man who even now lives little better than a beetle or a gnat. And how completely run down he is from his computations! Let’s go and see another.
Μίκυλλος: ὁρῶ κακοδαίμονα καὶ ἀνόητον ἄνθρωπον οὐδὲ νῦν πολὺ τῆς σίλφης ἢ ἐμπίδος ἄμεινον βιοῦντα. ὡς δὲ καὶ οὗτος ἐκτέτηκεν ὅλος ὑπὸ τῶν λογισμῶν. ἐπʼ ἄλλον ἀπίωμεν.
32. COCK: Your friend Eucrates, if you like. See, this door has opened too, so let’s go in.
32. Ἀλεκτρυών: παρὰ τὸν σὸν Εὐκράτην, εἰ δοκεῖ. καὶ ἰδοὺ γάρ, ἀνέῳγε καὶ αὕτη ἡ θύρα· ὥστε εἰσίωμεν.
MICYLLUS: All this belonged to me a little while ago.
Μίκυλλος: ἅπαντα ταῦτα μικρὸν ἔμπροσθεν ἐμὰ ἦν.
COCK: Why, are you still dreaming of your wealth? Do you see Eucrates and his servant, old man as he is...?
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἔτι γὰρ σὺ ὀνειροπολεῖς τὸν πλοῦτον; ὁρᾷς δʼ οὖν τὸν Εὐκράτην αὐτὸν μὲν ὑπὸ τοῦ οἰκέτου πρεσβύτην ἄνθρωπον …;
MICYLLUS: Yes, by Heaven, I see lust and sensuality and lewdness ill befitting a human being; and in another quarter I see his wife and the cook...
Μίκυλλος: ὁρῶ νὴ Δία καταπυγοσύνην καὶ πασχητιασμόν τινα καὶ ἀσέλγειαν οὐκ ἀνθρωπίνην· τὴν γυναῖκα δὲ ἑτέρωθι ὑπὸ τοῦ μαγείρου καὶ αὐτήν … Ἀλεκτρυών: τί οὖν;
33. COCK: How about it? Would you be willing to inherit all this too, Micyllus, and have all that belongs to Eucrates?MICYLLUS: Not on your life, cock! [I starve first! ‘To the deuce with your gold and your dinners; two obols is a fortune to me in comparison with being an easy mark for the servants.
33. ἐθέλοις ἂν καὶ τούτων κληρονομεῖν, ὦ Μίκυλλε, καὶ πάντα ἔχειν τὰ Εὐκράτους;Μίκυλλος: μηδαμῶς, ὦ ἀλεκτρυών· λιμῷ ἀπολοίμην πρότερον. χαιρέτω τὸ χρυσίον καὶ τὰ δεῖπνα, δύο ὀβολοὶ ἐμοί γε πλοῦτός ἐστι μᾶλλον ἢ τοιχωρυχεῖσθαι πρὸς τῶν οἰκετῶν.
COCK: Well, the day is just breaking, so let’s go home now; you shall see the rest of it some other time.
Ἀλεκτρυών: ἀλλὰ νῦν γὰρ ἡμέρα ἤδη ἀμφὶ τὸ λυκαυγὲς αὐτό, ἀπίωμεν οἴκαδε παρʼ ἡμᾶς· τὰ λοιπὰ δὲ εἰσαῦθις ὄψει, ὦ Μίκυλλε.