---
title: "The Eunuch · Εὐνοῦχος"
author: "Lucian"
translator: "Austin Morris Harmon"
languages: [grc, en]
shelf: "Classical Greek"
section: 1 of 1
url: https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-the-eunuch/1/
cite: "Lucian, tr. Austin Morris Harmon, The Eunuch · Εὐνοῦχος, section 1. Scriptura (scriptura.si), https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-the-eunuch/1/"
---

# The Eunuch · Εὐνοῦχος

*Lucian, tr. Austin Morris Harmon*

Can a eunuch hold a chair of philosophy?

> Greek: ed. Austin Morris Harmon, from the Perseus Digital Library (canonical-greekLit, tlg0062.tlg047, CC BY-SA 4.0).

> English: Austin Morris Harmon, from the Perseus Digital Library (tlg0062.tlg047.perseus-eng2). Notes are not included.

> Rows follow the references the two texts share (chapters and sections), cut where both reach the end of a sentence.

## 1. Sections 1–13

Source: https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-the-eunuch/1/ · cite a paragraph as https://scriptura.si/works/lucian-the-eunuch/1/#p-N

[¶0] 1. PAMPHILUS Where have you been, Lycinus, and what are you laughing at, I should like to know, as you come? Of course, you are always in a good humour, but this appears to me to be something out of the ordinary, as you cannot restrain your laughter over it. LYCINUS I have been in the Agora, I’d have you know, Pamphilus; and I shall make you share my laughter at once if you let me tell you what sort of case has been tried in my presence, between philosophers wrangling with each other. PAMPHILUS Well, what you have already said is laughable, in all truth, that followers of philosophy should have it out with one another at law, when they ought, even if it should be something of importance, to settle their complaints peaceably among themselves.

> Greek: 1. Πάμφιλος: πόθεν, ὦ Λυκῖνε, καὶ τί γελῶν ἡμῖν ἀφῖξαι; ἀεὶ μὲν γὰρ φαιδρὸς ὢν τυγχάνεις, τουτὶ δὲ πλέον τοῦ συνήθους εἶναί μοι δοκεῖ, ἐφʼ ὅτῳ μηδὲ κατέχειν δυνατὸς εἶ τὸν γέλωτα. Λυκῖνος: ἐξ ἀγορᾶς μὲν ἥκω σοι, ὦ Πάμφιλε· τοῦ γέλωτος δὲ αὐτίκα κοινωνὸν ποιήσομαί σε, ἢν ἀκούσῃς οἵᾳ δίκῃ δικαζομένῃ παρεγενόμην, φιλοσόφων πρὸς ἀλλήλους ἐριζόντων. Πάμφιλος: καὶ τοῦτο μὲν ὡς ἀληθῶς γελοῖον λέγεις, τὸ φιλοσοφοῦντας δικάζεσθαι πρὸς ἀλλήλους, δέον, εἰ καί τι μέγα εἴη, κατʼ εἰρήνην ἐν σφίσι διαλύεσθαι τὰ ἐγκλήματα.

[¶1] 2. LYCINUS Indeed, you blessed simpleton! Peaceably! They! Why, they came together at full tilt and flung whole cartloads of abuse upon each other, shouting and straining their lungs enough to split them!
PAMPHILUS No doubt, Lycinus, they were bickering about their doctrines, as usual, being of different sects? LYCINUS Not at all; this was something different, for they were of the same sect and agreed in their doctrines. Nevertheless, a trial had been arranged, and the judges, endowed with the deciding vote, were the most prominent and oldest and wisest men in the city, in whose presence one would have been ashamed even to strike a false note, let alone resorting to such shamelessness. PAMPHILUS Then do please tell me at once the point at issue in the trial, so that I may know what it is that has stirred up so much laughter in you.

> Greek: 2. Λυκῖνος: πόθεν, ὦ μακάριε, κατʼ εἰρήνην ἐκεῖνοι, οἵ γε ξυμπεσόντες ὅλας ἁμάξας βλασφημιῶν κατεσκέδασαν ἀλλήλων, κεκραγότες καὶ ὑπερδιατεινόμενοι; Πάμφιλος: ἦ που, ὦ Λυκῖνε, περὶ τῶν λόγων διεφέροντο τὰ συνήθη ταῦτα, ἑτερόδοξοι τυγχάνοντες; Λυκῖνος: οὐδαμῶς, ἀλλʼ ἑτεροῖόν τι τοῦτο ἦν· ὁμόδοξοι γὰρ ἄμφω καὶ ἀπὸ τῶν αὐτῶν λόγων. δίκη δὲ ὅμως συνειστήκει καὶ δικασταὶ ψηφοφοροῦντες ἦσαν οἱ ἄριστοι καὶ πρεσβύτατοι καὶ σοφώτατοι τῶν ἐν τῇ πόλει καὶ ἐφʼ ὧν ἄν τις ᾐδέσθη παρὰ μέλος τι φθεγξάμενος, οὐχ ὅπως ἐς τοσαύτην ἀναισχυντίαν τραπόμενος. Πάμφιλος: οὐκοῦν λέγοις ἂν ἤδη τὸ κεφάλαιον τῆς δίκης, ὡς καὶ αὐτὸς εἰδείην ὅ τι σοὶ τὸ κεκινηκὸς εἴη τὸν τοσοῦτον γέλωτα.

[¶2] 3. LYCINUS Well, Pamphilus, the Emperor has established, as you know, an allowance, not inconsiderable, for the philosophers according to sect—the Stoics, I mean, the Platonics, and the Epicureans; also those of the Walk, the same amount for each of these. It was stipulated that when one of them died another should be appointed in his stead, after being approved by vote of the first citizens. And the prize was not “a shield of hide or a victim,” as the poet has it, but a matter of ten thousand drachmas a year, for instructing boys. PAMPHILUS I know all that; and one of them died, they say, recently—one of the two Peripatetics, I think.
LYCINUS That, Pamphilus, is the Helen for whom they were meeting each other in single combat. And up to this point there was nothing to laugh at except perhaps that men rah to be philosophers and to despise lucre should fight for it as if for imperilled fatherland, ancestral fanes, and graves of forefathers. PAMPHILUS Yes, but that is the doctrine of the Peripatetics, not to despise wealth vehemently but to think it a third “supreme good.” LYCINUS Right you are; they do say that, and the war that they were waging was on traditional lines.

> Greek: 3. Λυκῖνος: συντέτακται μέν, ὦ Πάμφιλε, ὡς οἶσθα, ἐκ βασιλέως μισθοφορά τις οὐ φαύλη κατὰ γένη τοῖς φιλοσόφοις, Στωϊκοῖς λέγω καὶ Πλατωνικοῖς καὶ Ἐπικουρείοις, ἔτι δὲ καὶ τοῖς ἐκ τοῦ Περιπάτου, τὰ ἴσα τούτοις ἅπασιν. ἔδει δὲ ἀποθανόντος αὐτῶν τινος ἄλλον ἀντικαθίστασθαι δοκιμασθέντα ψήφῳ τῶν ἀρίστων. καὶ τὰ ἆθλα οὐ βοείη τις ἦν, κατὰ τὸν ποιητήν, οὐδὲ ἱερεῖον, ἀλλὰ μύριαι κατὰ τὸν ἐνιαυτόν, ἐφʼ ὅτῳ συνεῖναι τοῖς νέοις. Πάμφιλος: οἶδα ταῦτα· καί τινά φασιν αὐτῶν ἔναγχος ἀποθανεῖν, τῶν Περιπατητικῶν οἶμαι τὸν ἕτερον. Λυκῖνος: αὕτη, ὦ Πάμφιλε, ἡ Ἑλένη ὑπὲρ ἧς ἐμονομάχουν πρὸς ἀλλήλους. καὶ ἄχρι γε τούτου γελοῖον οὐδὲν πλὴν ἐκεῖνο ἴσως, τὸ φιλοσόφους εἶναι φάσκοντας καὶ χρημάτων καταφρονεῖν ἔπειτα ὑπὲρ τούτων ὡς ὑπὲρ πατρίδος κινδυνευούσης καὶ ἱερῶν πατρῴων καὶ τάφων προγονικῶν ἀγωνίζεσθαι. Πάμφιλος: καὶ μὴν καὶ τὸ δόγμα τοῦτό γέ ἐστιν τοῖς Περιπατητικοῖς, τὸ μὴ σφόδρα καταφρονεῖν χρημάτων, ἀλλὰ τρίτον τι ἀγαθὸν καὶ τοῦτο οἴεσθαι. Λυκῖνος: ὀρθῶς λέγεις. φασὶ γὰρ οὖν ταῦτα, καὶ κατὰ τὰ πάτρια ἐγίγνετο αὐτοῖς ὁ πόλεμος.

[¶3] 4. But listen now to the sequel. Many competitors took part in the funeral games of the deceased, but two of them in particular were the most favoured to win, the aged Diocles (you know the man I mean, the dialectician) and Bagoas, the one who is reputed to be a eunuch. The matter of doctrines had been thrashed out between them already, and each had displayed his familiarity with their tenets and his adherence to Aristotle and his placita; and by Zeus neither of them had the better of it.

> Greek: 4. Λυκῖνος: τὰ μετὰ ταῦτα δὲ ἤδη ἄκουε. πολλοὶ μὲν γὰρ καὶ ἄλλοι τὸν ἐπιτάφιον τοῦ ἀποθανόντος ἐκείνου ἠγωνίζοντο· δύο δὲ μάλιστα ἦσαν οἱ ἀμφήριστοι αὐτῶν, Διοκλῆς τε ὁ πρεσβύτης — οἶσθα ὃν λέγω, τὸν ἐριστικόν — καὶ Βαγώας ὁ εὐνοῦχος εἶναι δοκῶν. τὰ μὲν οὖν τῶν λόγων προηγώνιστο αὐτοῖς καὶ τὴν ἐμπειρίαν ἑκάτερος τῶν δογμάτων ἐπεδέδεικτο καὶ ὅτι τοῦ Ἀριστοτέλους καὶ τῶν ἐκείνῳ δοκούντων εἴχετο· καὶ μὰ τὸν Δίʼ οὐδέτερος αὐτῶν ἀμείνων ἦν.

[¶4] 5. The close of the trial, however, took a new turn; Diocles, discontinuing the advertisement of his own merits, passed over to Bagoas and made a great effort to show up his private life, and Bagoas met this attack by exploring the history of Diocles in like manner.
PAMPHILUS Naturally, Lycinus; and the greater part, certainly, of their discussion ought rather to have centred upon that. For my own part, if I had chanced to be a judge, I should have dwelt most, I think, upon that sort of thing, trying to ascertain which led the better life rather than which was the better prepared in the tenets themselves, and deeming him more suitable to win.

> Greek: 5. Λυκῖνος: τὸ δʼ οὖν τέλος τῆς δίκης ἐς τοῦτο περιέστη· ἀφέμενος γὰρ ὁ Διοκλῆς τοῦ δεικνύναι τὰ αὑτοῦ μετέβαινεν ἐπὶ τὸν Βαγώαν καὶ διελέγχειν ἐπειρᾶτο μάλιστα τὸν βίον αὐτοῦ· κατὰ ταὐτὰ δὲ καὶ ὁ Βαγώας ἀντεξήταζε τὸν ἐκείνου βίον. Πάμφιλος: εἰκότως, ὦ Λυκῖνε· καὶ τὰ πλείω γε τοῦ λόγου περὶ τούτου μᾶλλον ἐχρῆν εἶναι αὐτοῖς· ὡς ἔγωγε, εἰ δικάζων ἐτύγχανον, ἐπὶ τῷ τοιούτῳ τὸ πλεῖον διατρῖψαι ἄν μοι δοκῶ, τὸν ἄμεινον βιοῦντα μᾶλλον ἢ τὸν ἐν τοῖς λόγοις αὐτοῖς προχειρότερον ζητῶν καὶ οἰκειότερον τῇ νίκῃ νομίζων.

[¶5] 6. LYCINUS Well said, and you have me voting with you in this. But when they had their fill of hard words, and their fill of caustic observations, Diocles at length said in conclusion that it was not at all permissible for Bagoas to lay claim to philosophy and the rewards of merit in it, since he was a eunuch; such people ought to be excluded, he thought, not simply from all that but even from temples and holy-water bowls and all the places of public assembly, and he declared it an ill-omened, ill-met sight if on first leaving home in the morning, one should set eyes on any such person. He had a great deal to say, too, on that score, observing that a eunuch was neither man nor woman but something composite, hybrid, and monstrous, alien to human nature. PAMPHILUS The charge you tell of, Lycinus, is novel, anyhow, and now I too, my friend, am moved to laughter, hearing of this incredible accusation. Well, what of the other? Held his peace, did he not? Or did he venture to say something himself in reply to this?

> Greek: 6. Λυκῖνος: εὖ λέγεις, κἀμὲ ὁμόψηφον ἐν τούτῳ ἔχεις. ἐπεὶ δὲ ἅλις μὲν εἶχον βλασφημιῶν, ἅλις δὲ ἐλέγχων, τὸ τελευταῖον ἤδη ὁ Διοκλῆς ἔφη μηδὲ τὴν ἀρχὴν θεμιτὸν εἶναι τῷ Βαγώᾳ μεταποιεῖσθαι φιλοσοφίας καὶ τῶν ἐπʼ αὐτῇ ἀριστείων εὐνούχῳ γε ὄντι, ἀλλὰ τοὺς τοιούτους οὐχ ὅπως τούτων ἀποκεκλεῖσθαι ἠξίου, ἀλλὰ καὶ ἱερῶν αὐτῶν καὶ περιρραντηρίων καὶ τῶν κοινῶν ἁπάντων συλλόγων, δυσοιώνιστόν τι ἀποφαίνων καὶ δυσάντητον θέαμα, εἴ τις ἕωθεν ἐξιὼν ἐκ τῆς οἰκίας ἴδοι τοιοῦτόν τινα. καὶ πολὺς ἦν ὁ περὶ τούτου λόγος, οὔτε ἄνδρα οὔτε γυναῖκα εἶναι τὸν εὐνοῦχον λέγοντος, ἀλλά τι σύνθετον καὶ μικτὸν καὶ τερατῶδες, ἔξω τῆς ἀνθρωπείας φύσεως. Πάμφιλος: καινόν γε τὸ ἔγκλημα φής, ὦ Λυκῖνε, καὶ ἤδη γελᾶν καὶ αὐτός, ὦ ἑταῖρε, προάγομαι τῆς παραδόξου ταύτης κατηγορίας ἀκούων. τί δʼ οὖν ἅτερος; ἆρα τὴν ἡσυχίαν ἤγαγεν, ἤ τι πρὸς ταῦτα καὶ αὐτὸς ἀντειπεῖν ἐτόλμησεν;

[¶6] 7. LYCINUS At first, through shame and cowardice—for that sort of behaviour is natural to them—he remained silent a long while and blushed and was plainly in a sweat, but finally in a weak, effeminate voice he said that Diocles was acting unjustly in trying to exclude a eunuch from philosophy, in which even women had a part; and he brought in Aspasia, Diotima, and Thargelia to support his also a certain Academic eunuch hailing from among the Pelasgians, who shortly before our time achieved a high reputation among the Greeks. But if that person himself were alive and advanced similar claims, Diocles would (he said) have excluded him too, undismayed by his reputation among the common sort; and he repeated a number of humorous remarks made to the man by Stoics and Cynics regarding his physical imperfection.

> Greek: 7. Λυκῖνος: τὰ μὲν πρῶτα ὑπʼ αἰδοῦς καὶ δειλίας — οἰκεῖον γὰρ αὐτοῖς τὸ τοιοῦτον — ἐπὶ πολὺ ἐσιώπα καὶ ἠρυθρία καὶ ἰδίων φανερὸς ἦν, τέλος δὲ λεπτόν τι καὶ γυναικεῖον ἐμφθεγξάμενος οὐ δίκαια ποιεῖν ἔφη τὸν Διοκλέα φιλοσοφίας ἀποκλείοντα εὐνοῦχον ὄντα, ἧς καὶ γυναιξὶ μετεῖναι· καὶ παρήγοντο Ἀσπασία καὶ Διοτίμα καὶ Θαργηλία συνηγορήσουσαι αὐτῷ, καί τις Ἀκαδημαϊκὸς εὐνοῦχος ἐκ Πελασγῶν τελῶν, ὀλίγον πρὸ ἡμῶν εὐδοκιμήσας ἐν τοῖς Ἕλλησιν. ὁ Διοκλῆς δὲ κἀκεῖνον αὐτόν, εἰ περιῆν καὶ τῶν ὁμοίων μετεποιεῖτο, εἶρξαι ἂν οὐ καταπλαγεὶς αὐτοῦ τὴν παρὰ τοῖς πολλοῖς δόξαν· καί τινας καὶ αὐτὸς ἀπεμνημόνευε λόγους καὶ πρὸς ἐκεῖνον ὑπό τε Στωϊκῶν καὶ Κυνικῶν μάλιστα εἰρημένους πρὸς τὸ γελοιότερον ἐπὶ τῷ ἀτελεῖ τοῦ σώματος.

[¶7] 8. That was what the judges dwelt upon, and the point thenceforward at issue was whether the seal of approval should be set upon a eunuch who was proposing himself for a career in philosophy and requesting that the governance of boys be committed to him. One said that presence and a fine physical endowment should be among the attributes of a philosopher, and that above all else he should have a long beard that would inspire confidence in those who visited him and sought to become his pupils, one that would befit the ten thousand drachmas which he was to receive from the Emperor, whereas a eunuch was in worse case than a cut priest, for the latter had at least known manhood once, but the former had been marred from the very first and was an ambiguous sort of creature like a crow, which cannot be reckoned either with doves or with ravens.

> Greek: 8. Λυκῖνος: ἐν τούτοις ἦν τοῖς δικασταῖς ἡ διατριβή· καὶ τὸ κεφάλαιον ἤδη τοῦ σκέμματος τοῦτο ἐτύγχανεν, εἰ δοκιμαστέος εὐνοῦχος ἐπὶ φιλοσοφίαν παραγγέλλων καὶ νέων προστασίαν ἐγχειρισθῆναι ἀξιῶν, τοῦ μὲν καὶ σχῆμα καὶ σώματος εὐμοιρίαν προσεῖναι φιλοσόφῳ δεῖν λέγοντος, καὶ τὸ μέγιστον, πώγωνα βαθὺν ἔχειν αὐτὸν καὶ τοῖς προσιοῦσι καὶ μανθάνειν βουλομένοις ἀξιόπιστον καὶ πρέποντα ταῖς μυρίαις ἃς χρὴ παρὰ βασιλέως ἀποφέρεσθαι, τὸ δὲ τοῦ εὐνούχου καὶ τῶν βακήλων χεῖρον εἶναι· τοὺς μὲν γὰρ κἂν πεπειρᾶσθαί ποτε ἀνδρείας, τοῦτον δὲ ἐξ ἀρχῆς εὐθὺς ἀποκεκόφθαι καὶ ἀμφίβολόν τι ζῷον εἶναι κατὰ ταὐτὰ ταῖς κορώναις, αἳ μήτε περιστεραῖς μήτε κόραξιν ἐναριθμοῖντο ἄν, Λυκῖνος: τοῦ δὲ οὐ σωματικὴν λέγοντος εἶναι τὴν κρίσιν, ἀλλὰ τῆς ψυχῆς καὶ τῆς γνώμης ἐξέτασιν δεῖν γίγνεσθαι καὶ τῆς τῶν δογμάτων ἐπιστήμης.

[¶8] 9. The other pleaded that this was not a physical examination; that there should be an investigation of soul and mind and knowledge of doctrines. Then Aristotle was cited as a witness to support his case, since he tremendously admired the eunuch Hermias, the tyrant of Atarneus, to the point of celebrating sacrifices to him in the same way as to the gods. Moreover, Bagoas ventured to add an observation to the effect that a eunuch was a far more suitable teacher for the young, since he could not incur any blame as regards them and would not incur that charge against Socrates of leading the youngsters astray. And as he had been ridiculed especially for his beardlessness, he despatched this shaft to good effect—he thought so, anyhow: “If it is by length of beard that philosophers are to be judged, a he-goat would with greater justice be given preference to all of them!”

> Greek: 9. εἶθʼ ὁ Ἀριστοτέλης ἐκαλεῖτο μάρτυς τοῦ λόγου, εἰς ὑπερβολὴν θαυμάσας Ἑρμείαν τὸν εὐνοῦχον τὸν ἐκ τοῦ Ἀταρνέως τύραννον ἄχρι τοῦ καὶ θύειν αὐτῷ κατὰ ταὐτὰ τοῖς θεοῖς. καί τι καὶ ἐτόλμα προστιθέναι ὁ Βαγώας τοιοῦτον, ὡς πολὺ ἐπιτηδειότερος τοῖς νέοις εὐνοῦχος διδάσκαλος οὐδὲ διαβολήν τινα πρὸς αὐτοὺς ἐνδέξασθαι δυνάμενος οὐδὲ τὸ τοῦ Σωκράτους ἐκεῖνο ἔγκλημα παθεῖν ἂν ὡς διαφθείρων τὰ μειράκια. ἐπεὶ δὲ καὶ εἰς τὸ ἀγένειον μάλιστα ἐσκώφθη, χαριέντως τοῦτο, ὡς γοῦν ᾤετο, προσέρριψεν· εἰ γὰρ ἀπὸ πώγωνος, ἔφη, βαθέος κρίνεσθαι δέοι τοὺς φιλοσοφοῦντας, τὸν τράγον ἂν δικαιότερον προκριθῆναι πάντων.

[¶9] 10. At this juncture a third person who was present— his name may remain in obscurity—said: “As a matter of fact, gentlemen, if this fellow, so smooth of jowl, effeminate in voice, and otherwise similar to a eunuch, should strip, you would find him very masculine. Unless those who talk about him are lying, he was once taken in adultery, commissis membris, as the table of the law says. At that time he secured his acquittal by resorting to the name of eunuch and finding sanctuary in it, since the judges on that occasion discredited the accusation from the very look of him. Now, however, he may recant, I suppose, for the sake of the pelf that is in view.”

> Greek: 10. Λυκῖνος: ἐν τούτῳ τρίτος ἄλλος παρεστώς — τὸ δὲ ὄνομα ἐν ἀφανεῖ κείσθω — καὶ μήν ἔφη, ὦ ἄνδρες δικασταί, οὑτοσὶ ὁ τὰς γνάθους λεῖος καὶ τὸ φώνημα γυναικεῖος καὶ τὰ ἄλλα εὐνούχῳ ἐοικὼς εἰ ἀποδύσαιτο, πάνυ ἀνδρεῖος ὑμῖν φανεῖται· εἰ δὲ μὴ ψεύδονται οἱ περὶ αὐτοῦ λέγοντες, καὶ μοιχὸς ἑάλω ποτέ, ὡς ὁ ἄξων φησίν, ἄρθρα ἐν ἄρθροις ἔχων. ἀλλὰ τότε μὲν ἐς τὸν εὐνοῦχον ἀναφυγὼν καὶ τοῦτο κρησφύγετον εὑρόμενος ἀφείθη, ἀπιστησάντων τῇ κατηγορίᾳ τῶν τότε δικαστῶν ἀπό γε τῆς φανερᾶς ὄψεως· νῦν δὲ κἂν παλινῳδῆσαί μοι δοκεῖ τοῦ προκειμένου μισθοῦ ἕνεκα.

[¶10] 11. Upon those remarks everyone began to laugh, as was natural, while Bagoas fell into greater confusion and. was beside himself, turning all colours of the rainbow and dripping with cold sweat. On the one hand, he did not think it seemly to plead guilty to the charge of adultery; yet, on the other, he thought that this accusation would not be without its usefulness for the case then in progress. PAMPHILUS This is truly laughable, Lycinus, and must have given you uncommon diversion. But what was the outcome, and how did the judges decide about them?

> Greek: 11. Λυκῖνος: τούτων δὴ λεγομένων παρὰ πάντων μὲν γέλως ἐγίγνετο, ὡς τὸ εἰκός. Βαγώας δὲ μᾶλλον ἐταράττετο καὶ παντοῖος ἦν, ἐς μυρία τρεπόμενος χρώματα καὶ ψυχρῷ τῷ ἱδρῶτι ῥεόμενος, καὶ οὔτε συγκατατίθεσθαι τῷ περὶ τῆς μοιχείας ἐγκλήματι καλῶς ἔχειν ᾤετο οὔτε ἀχρεῖον αὑτῷ τὴν κατηγορίαν ταύτην ἐς τὸν παρόντα ἀγῶνα ἡγεῖτο εἶναι. Πάμφιλος: γελοῖα, ὦ Λυκῖνε, ὡς ἀληθῶς ταῦτα καὶ ἔοικεν οὐ τὴν τυχοῦσαν ὑμῖν διατριβὴν παρεσχῆσθαι. τὸ δʼ οὖν τέλος τί ἐγένετο καὶ πῶς ἔγνωσαν ὑπὲρ αὐτῶν οἱ δικασταί;

[¶11] 12. LYCINUS They were not all of the same opinion. Some thought they ought to strip him, as is done with slaves, and determine by inspection whether he had the parts to practise philosophy. Others made the suggestion, even more ridiculous, that they should send for some women out of bawdy-houses and bid him consort with them and cohabit; and that one of the judges, the eldest and most trustworthy, should stand by and see whether he could practise philosophy! Then, as all were overcome by laughter and every man of them had a sore belly from shaking with it, they decided to refer the case to the highest court and send it to Italy.

> Greek: 12. Λυκῖνος: οὐχ ὁμόψηφοι πάντες ἦσαν, ἀλλʼ οἱ μὲν ἠξίουν ἀποδύσαντας αὐτὸν ὥσπερ τοὺς ἀργυρωνήτους ἐπισκοπεῖν εἰ δύναται φιλοσοφεῖν τά γε πρὸς τῶν ὄρχεων· οἱ δὲ ἔτι γελοιότερον μεταστειλαμένους τινὰς τῶν ἐξ οἰκήματος γυναικῶν κελεύειν αὐτὸν συνεῖναι καὶ ὀπυίειν, καί τινα τῶν δικαστῶν τὸν πρεσβύτατόν τε καὶ πιστότατον ἐφεστῶτα ὁρᾶν εἰ φιλοσοφεῖ. μετὰ δὲ ἐπεὶ πάντας ὁ γέλως κατεῖχε καὶ οὐδεὶς ὅστις οὐ τὴν γαστέρα ἤλγει βρασσόμενος ὑπʼ αὐτοῦ, ἔγνωσαν ἀναπόμπιμον ἐς τὴν Ἰταλίαν ἐκπέμψαι τὴν δίκην.

[¶12] 13. Now, one of the pair is training, they say, for a demonstration of his eloquence, making his preparations, and composing an accusation. Morever, he is delicately putting forward the charge of adultery again, thereby acting in direct contradiction to himself, like a bad lawyer, and enrolling his opponent among fully enfranchised males through his accusation. As to Bagoas, he, they say, has different concerns, assiduously demonstrating his powers, keeping his case in hand, and, in sum, hoping to win if he can show that he is not a bit inferior to a jack at service. This, my friend, is apparently the best criterion of devotion to wisdom, and an irrefutable demonstration. Consequently, I may well pray that my son (who is still quite young) may be suitably endowed for the practise of philosophy with other tools than brain or tongue.

> Greek: 13. Λυκῖνος: καὶ νῦν ἅτερος μὲν πρὸς τὴν τῶν λόγων ἐπίδειξιν, ὥς φασιν, γυμνάζεται καὶ παρασκευάζεται καὶ κατηγορίαν συγκροτεῖ καὶ τὸ τῆς μοιχείας ἔγκλημα ὑποκινεῖ, ἐναντιώτατον αὑτῷ καὶ οὗτος κατὰ τοὺς φαύλους τῶν ῥητόρων τοῦτο ποιῶν καὶ εἰς τοὺς ἄνδρας τὸν ἀντίδικον ἐκ τοῦ ἐγκλήματος καταλέγων· τῷ Βαγώᾳ δὲ ἕτερα, ὥς φασι, μέλει καὶ ἀνδρίζεται τὰ πολλὰ καὶ διὰ χειρὸς ἔχει τὸ πρᾶγμα καὶ τέλος κρατήσειν ἐλπίζει ἢν ἐπιδείξῃ ὡς οὐδὲν χείρων ἐστὶν τῶν τὰς ἵππους ἀναβαινόντων ὄνων. αὕτη γάρ, ὦ ἑταῖρε, φιλοσοφίας ἀρίστη κρίσις ἔοικεν εἶναι καὶ ἀπόδειξις ἀναντίλεκτος. ὥστε καὶ τὸν υἱὸν — ἔτι δέ μοι κομιδῇ νέος ἐστίν — εὐξαίμην ἂν οὐ τὴν γνώμην οὐδὲ τὴν γλῶτταν ἀλλὰ τὸ αἰδοῖον ἕτοιμον ἐς φιλοσοφίαν ἔχειν.