U Po Kyin, Sub-divisional Magistrate of Kyauktada, in Upper Burma, was
sitting in his veranda. It was only half-past eight, but the month was
April, and there was a closeness in the air, a threat of the long
stifling midday hours. Occasional faint breaths of wind, seeming cool by
contrast, stirred the newly-drenched orchids that hung from the eaves.
Beyond the orchids one could see the dusty, curved trunk of a palm tree,
and then the blazing ultramarine sky. Up in the zenith, so high that it
dazzled one to look at them, a few vultures circled without the quiver
of a wing.
Unblinking, rather like a great porcelain idol, U Po Kyin gazed out into
the fierce sunlight. He was a man of fifty, so fat that for years he had
not risen from his chair without help, and yet shapely and even
beautiful in his grossness; for the Burmese do not sag and bulge like
white men, but grow fat symmetrically, like fruits swelling. His face
was vast, yellow and quite unwrinkled, and his eyes were tawny. His
feet—squat, high-arched feet with the toes all the same length—were
bare, and so was his cropped head, and he wore one of those vivid
Arakanese longyis with green and magenta checks which the Burmese wear
on informal occasions. He was chewing betel from a lacquered box on the
table, and thinking about his past life.
It had been a brilliantly successful life. U Po Kyin’s earliest memory,
back in the ’eighties, was of standing, a naked pot-bellied child,
watching the British troops march victorious into Mandalay. He
remembered the terror he had felt of those columns of great beef-fed
men, red-faced and red-coated; and the long rifles over their shoulders,
and the heavy, rhythmic tramp of their boots. He had taken to his heels
after watching them for a few minutes. In his childish way he had
grasped that his own people were no match for this race of giants. To
fight on the side of the British, to become a parasite upon them, had
been his ruling ambition, even as a child.
At seventeen he had tried for a Government appointment, but he had
failed to get it, being poor and friendless, and for three years he had
worked in the stinking labyrinth of the Mandalay bazaars, clerking for
the rice merchants and sometimes stealing. Then when he was twenty a
lucky stroke of blackmail put him in possession of four hundred rupees,
and he went at once to Rangoon and bought his way into a Government
clerkship. The job was a lucrative one though the salary was small. At
that time a ring of clerks were making a steady income by
misappropriating Government stores, and Po Kyin (he was plain Po Kyin
then: the honorific U came years later) took naturally to this kind of
thing. However, he had too much talent to spend his life in a clerkship,
stealing miserably in annas and pice. One day he discovered that the
Government, being short of minor officials, were going to make some
appointments from among the clerks. The news would have become public in
another week, but it was one of Po Kyin’s qualities that his information
was always a week ahead of everyone else’s. He saw his chance and
denounced all his confederates before they could take alarm. Most of
them were sent to prison, and Po Kyin was made an Assistant Township
Officer as the reward of his honesty. Since then he had risen steadily.
Now, at fifty-six, he was a Sub-divisional Magistrate, and he would
probably be promoted still further and made an acting Deputy
Commissioner, with Englishmen as his equals and even his subordinates.
As a magistrate his methods were simple. Even for the vastest bribe he
would never sell the decision of a case, because he knew that a
magistrate who gives wrong judgments is caught sooner or later. His
practice, a much safer one, was to take bribes from both sides and then
decide the case on strictly legal grounds. This won him a useful
reputation for impartiality. Besides his revenue from litigants, U Po
Kyin levied a ceaseless toll, a sort of private taxation scheme, from
all the villages under his jurisdiction. If any village failed in its
tribute U Po Kyin took punitive measures—gangs of dacoits attacked the
village, leading villagers were arrested on false charges, and so
forth—and it was never long before the amount was paid up. He also
shared the proceeds of all the larger-sized robberies that took place in
the district. Most of this, of course, was known to everyone except U Po
Kyin’s official superiors (no British officer will ever believe anything
against his own men) but the attempts to expose him invariably failed;
his supporters, kept loyal by their share of the loot, were too
numerous. When any accusation was brought against him, U Po Kyin simply
discredited it with strings of suborned witnesses, following this up by
counter-accusations which left him in a stronger position than ever. He
was practically invulnerable, because he was too fine a judge of men
ever to choose a wrong instrument, and also because he was too absorbed
in intrigue ever to fail through carelessness or ignorance. One could
say with practical certainty that he would never be found out, that he
would go from success to success, and would finally die full of honour,
worth several lakhs of rupees.
And even beyond the grave his success would continue. According to
Buddhist belief, those who have done evil in their lives will spend the
next incarnation in the shape of a rat, a frog or some other low animal.
U Po Kyin was a good Buddhist and intended to provide against this
danger. He would devote his closing years to good works, which would
pile up enough merit to outweigh the rest of his life. Probably his good
works would take the form of building pagodas. Four pagodas, five, six,
seven—the priests would tell him how many—with carved stonework, gilt
umbrellas and little bells that tinkled in the wind, every tinkle a
prayer. And he would return to the earth in male human shape—for a
woman ranks at about the same level as a rat or a frog—or at worst as
some dignified beast such as an elephant.
All these thoughts flowed through U Po Kyin’s mind swiftly and for the
most part in pictures. His brain, though cunning, was quite barbaric,
and it never worked except for some definite end; mere meditation was
beyond him. He had now reached the point to which his thoughts had been
tending. Putting his smallish, triangular hands on the arms of his
chair, he turned himself a little way round and called, rather wheezily:
‘Ba Taik! Hey, Ba Taik!’
Ba Taik, U Po Kyin’s servant, appeared through the beaded curtain of theveranda. He was an undersized, pock-marked man with a timid and ratherhungry expression. U Po Kyin paid him no wages, for he was a convictedthief whom a word would send to prison. As Ba Taik advanced he shikoed,so low as to give the impression that he was stepping backwards.
‘Most holy god?’ he said.
‘Is anyone waiting to see me, Ba Taik?’
Ba Taik enumerated the visitors upon his fingers: ‘There is the headman
of Thitpingyi village, your honour, who has brought presents, and two
villagers who have an assault case that is to be tried by your honour,
and they too have brought presents. Ko Ba Sein, the head clerk of the
Deputy Commissioner’s office, wishes to see you, and there is Ali Shah,
the police constable, and a dacoit whose name I do not know. I think
they have quarrelled about some gold bangles they have stolen. And there
is also a young village girl with a baby.’
‘What does she want?’ said U Po Kyin.
‘She says that the baby is yours, most holy one.’
‘Ah. And how much has the headman brought?’
Ba Taik thought it was only ten rupees and a basket of mangoes.
‘Tell the headman,’ said U Po Kyin, ‘that it should be twenty rupees,
and there will be trouble for him and his village if the money is not
here tomorrow. I will see the others presently. Ask Ko Ba Sein to come
to me here.’
Ba Sein appeared in a moment. He was an erect, narrow-shouldered man,
very tall for a Burman, with a curiously smooth face that recalled a
coffee blancmange. U Po Kyin found him a useful tool. Unimaginative and
hardworking, he was an excellent clerk, and Mr Macgregor, the Deputy
Commissioner, trusted him with most of his official secrets. U Po Kyin,
put in a good temper by his thoughts, greeted Ba Sein with a laugh and
waved to the betel box.
‘Well, Ko Ba Sein, how does our affair progress? I hope that, as dear Mr
Macgregor would say’ U Po Kyin broke into English—‘“eet ees making
perceptible progress”?’
Ba Sein did not smile at the small joke. Sitting down stiff and
long-backed in the vacant chair, he answered:
‘Excellently, sir. Our copy of the paper arrived this morning. Kindly
observe.’
He produced a copy of a bilingual paper called the Burmese Patriot. It
was a miserable eight-page rag, villainously printed on paper as bad as
blotting-paper, and composed partly of news stolen from the _Rangoon
Gazette_, partly of weak Nationalist heroics. On the last page the type
had slipped and left the entire sheet jet-black, as though in mourning
for the smallness of the paper’s circulation. The article to which U Po
Kyin turned was of a rather different stamp from the rest. It ran:
In these happy times, when we poor blacks are being uplifted by
the mighty western civilisation, with its manifold blessings
such as the cinematograph, machine-guns, syphilis, etc., what
subject could be more inspiring than the private lives of our
European benefactors? We think therefore that it may interest
our readers to hear something of events in the up-country
district of Kyauktada. And especially of Mr Macgregor, honoured
Deputy Commissioner of said district.
Mr Macgregor is of the type of the Fine Old English Gentleman,
such as, in these happy days, we have so many examples before
our eyes. He is ‘a family man’ as our dear English cousins say.
Very much a family man is Mr Macgregor. So much so that he has
already three children in the district of Kyauktada, where he
has been a year, and in his last district of Shwemyo he left six
young progenies behind him. Perhaps it is an oversight on Mr
Macgregor’s part that he has left these young infants quite
unprovided for, and that some of their mothers are in danger of
starvation, etc. etc. etc.
There was a column of similar stuff, and wretched as it was, it was well
above the level of the rest of the paper. U Po Kyin read the article
carefully through, holding it at arm’s length—he was long-sighted—and
drawing his lips meditatively back, exposing great numbers of small,
perfect teeth, blood-red from betel juice.
‘The editor will get six months’ imprisonment for this,’ he said
finally.
‘He does not mind. He says that the only time when his creditors leave
him alone is when he is in prison.’
‘And you say that your little apprentice clerk Hla Pe wrote this article
all by himself? That is a very clever boy—a most promising boy! Never
tell me again that these Government High Schools are a waste of time.
Hla Pe shall certainly have his clerkship.’
‘You think, then, sir, that this article will be enough?’
U Po Kyin did not answer immediately. A puffing, labouring noise had
begun to proceed from him; he was trying to rise from his chair. Ba Taik
was familiar with this sound. He appeared from behind the beaded
curtain, and he and Ba Sein put a hand under each of U Po Kyin’s armpits
and hoisted him to his feet. U Po Kyin stood for a moment balancing the
weight of his belly upon his legs, with the movement of a fish porter
adjusting his load. Then he waved Ba Taik away.
‘Not enough,’ he said, answering Ba Sein’s question, ‘not enough by any
means. There is a lot to be done yet. But this is the right beginning.
Listen.’
He went to the rail to spit out a scarlet mouthful of betel, and then
began to quarter the veranda with short steps, his hands behind his
back. The friction of his vast thighs made him waddle slightly. As he
walked he talked, in the base jargon of the Government offices—a
patchwork of Burmese verbs and English abstract phrases:
‘Now, let us go into this affair from the beginning. We are going to
make a concerted attack on Dr Veraswami, who is the Civil Surgeon and
Superintendent of the jail. We are going to slander him, destroy his
reputation and finally ruin him for ever. It will be rather a delicate
operation.’
‘Yes, sir.’
‘There will be no risk, but we have got to go slowly. We are not
proceeding against a miserable clerk or police constable. We are
proceeding against a high official, and with a high official, even when
he is an Indian, it is not the same as with a clerk. How does one ruin a
clerk? Easy; an accusation, two dozen witnesses, dismissal and
imprisonment. But that will not do here. Softly, softly, softly is my
way. No scandal, and above all no official inquiry. There must be no
accusations that can be answered, and yet within three months I must fix
it in the head of every European in Kyauktada that the doctor is a
villain. What shall I accuse him of? Bribes will not do, a doctor does
not get bribes to any extent. What then?’
‘We could perhaps arrange a mutiny in the jail,’ said Ba Sein. ‘As
superintendent, the doctor would be blamed.’
‘No, it is too dangerous. I do not want the jail warders firing their
rifles in all directions. Besides, it would be expensive. Clearly, then,
it must be disloyalty—Nationalism, seditious propaganda. We must
persuade the Europeans that the doctor holds disloyal, anti-British
opinions. That is far worse than bribery; they expect a native official
to take bribes. But let them suspect his loyalty even for a moment, and
he is ruined.’
‘It would be a hard thing to prove,’ objected Ba Sein. ‘The doctor is
very loyal to the Europeans. He grows angry when anything is said
against them. They will know that, do you not think?’
‘Nonsense, nonsense,’ said U Po Kyin comfortably. ‘No European cares
anything about proofs. When a man has a black face, suspicion is
proof. A few anonymous letters will work wonders. It is only a question
of persisting; accuse, accuse, go on accusing—that is the way with
Europeans. One anonymous letter after another, to every European in
turn. And then, when their suspicions are thoroughly aroused——’ U Po
Kyin brought one short arm from behind his back and clicked his thumb
and finger. He added: ‘We begin with this article in the _Burmese
Patriot_. The Europeans will shout with rage when they see it. Well, the
next move is to persuade them that it was the doctor who wrote it.’
‘It will be difficult while he has friends among the Europeans. All of
them go to him when they are ill. He cured Mr Macgregor of his
flatulence this cold weather. They consider him a very clever doctor, I
believe.’
‘How little you understand the European mind, Ko Ba Sein! If the
Europeans go to Veraswami it is only because there is no other doctor in
Kyauktada. No European has any faith in a man with a black face. No,
with anonymous letters it is only a question of sending enough. I shall
soon see to it that he has no friends left.’
‘There is Mr Flory, the timber merchant,’ said Ba Sein. (He pronounced
it ‘Mr Porley’.) ‘He is a close friend of the doctor. I see him go to
his house every morning when he is in Kyauktada. Twice he has even
invited the doctor to dinner.’
‘Ah, now there you are right. If Flory were a friend of the doctor it
could do us harm. You cannot hurt an Indian when he has a European
friend. It gives him—what is that word they are so fond of?—prestige.
But Flory will desert his friend quickly enough when the trouble begins.
These people have no feeling of loyalty towards a native. Besides, I
happen to know that Flory is a coward. I can deal with him. Your part,
Ko Ba Sein, is to watch Mr Macgregor’s movements. Has he written to the
Commissioner lately—written confidentially, I mean?’
‘He wrote two days ago, but when we steamed the letter open we found it
was nothing of importance.’
‘Ah well, we will give him something to write about. And as soon as he
suspects the doctor, then is the time for that other affair I spoke to
you of. Thus we shall—what does Mr Macgregor say? Ah yes, “kill two
birds with one stone”. A whole flock of birds—ha, ha!’
U Po Kyin’s laugh was a disgusting bubbling sound deep down in his
belly, like the preparation for a cough; yet it was merry, even
childlike. He did not say any more about the ‘other affair’, which was
too private to be discussed even upon the veranda. Ba Sein, seeing the
interview at an end, stood up and bowed, angular as a jointed ruler.
‘Is there anything else your honour wishes done?’ he said.
‘Make sure that Mr Macgregor has his copy of the Burmese Patriot. You
had better tell Hla Pe to have an attack of dysentery and stay away from
office. I shall want him for the writing of the anonymous letters. That
is all for the present.’
‘Then I may go, sir?’
‘God go with you,’ said U Po Kyin rather abstractedly, and at once
shouted again for Ba Taik. He never wasted a moment of his day. It did
not take him long to deal with the other visitors and to send the
village girl away unrewarded, having examined her face and said that he
did not recognise her. It was now his breakfast time. Violent pangs of
hunger, which attacked him punctually at this hour every morning, began
to torment his belly. He shouted urgently:
‘Ba Taik! Hey, Ba Taik! Kin Kin! My breakfast! Be quick, I am starving.’
In the living-room behind the curtain a table was already set out with a
huge bowl of rice and a dozen plates containing curries, dried prawns
and sliced green mangoes. U Po Kyin waddled to the table, sat down with
a grunt and at once threw himself on the food. Ma Kin, his wife, stood
behind him and served him. She was a thin woman of five and forty, with
a kindly, pale brown, simian face. U Po Kyin took no notice of her while
he was eating. With the bowl close to his nose he stuffed the food into
himself with swift greasy fingers, breathing fast. All his meals were
swift, passionate and enormous; they were not meals so much as orgies,
debauches of curry and rice. When he had finished he sat back, belched
several times and told Ma Kin to fetch him a green Burmese cigar. He
never smoked English tobacco, which he declared had no taste in it.
Presently, with Ba Taik’s help, U Po Kyin dressed in his office clothes,
and stood for a while admiring himself in the long mirror in the
living-room. It was a wooden-walled room with two pillars, still
recognisable as teak-trunks, supporting the roof-tree, and it was dark
and sluttish as all Burmese rooms are, though U Po Kyin had furnished it
‘Ingaleik fashion’ with a veneered sideboard and chairs, some
lithographs of the Royal Family, and a fire-extinguisher. The floor was
covered with bamboo mats, much splashed by lime and betel juice.
Ma Kin was sitting on a mat in the corner, stitching an ingyi. U Po
Kyin turned slowly before the mirror, trying to get a glimpse of his
back view. He was dressed in a gaungbaung of pale pink silk, an
ingyi of starched muslin, and a paso of Mandalay silk, a gorgeous
salmon-pink brocaded with yellow. With an effort he turned his head
round and looked, pleased, at the paso tight and shining on his
enormous buttocks. He was proud of his fatness, because he saw the
accumulated flesh as the symbol of his greatness. He who had once been
obscure and hungry was now fat, rich and feared. He was swollen with the
bodies of his enemies; a thought from which he extracted something very
near poetry.
‘My new paso was cheap at twenty-two rupees, hey, Kin Kin?’ he said.
Ma Kin bent her head over her sewing. She was a simple, old-fashioned
woman, who had learned even less of European habits than U Po Kyin. She
could not sit on a chair without discomfort. Every morning she went to
the bazaar with a basket on her head, like a village woman, and in the
evenings she could be seen kneeling in the garden, praying to the white
spire of the pagoda that crowned the town. She had been the confidante
of U Po Kyin’s intrigues for twenty years and more.
‘Ko Po Kyin,’ she said, ‘you have done very much evil in your life.’
U Po Kyin waved his hand. ‘What does it matter? My pagodas will atone
for everything. There is plenty of time.’
Ma Kin bent her head over her sewing again, in an obstinate way she had
when she disapproved of something that U Po Kyin was doing.
‘But, Ko Po Kyin, where is the need of all this scheming and intriguing?
I heard you talking with Ko Ba Sein on the veranda. You are planning
some evil against Dr Veraswami. Why do you wish to harm that Indian
doctor? He is a good man.’
‘What do you know of these official matters, woman? The doctor stands in
my way. In the first place he refuses to take bribes, which makes it
difficult for the rest of us. And besides—well, there is something else
which you would never have the brains to understand.’
‘Ko Po Kyin, you have grown rich and powerful, and what good has it ever
done you? We were happier when we were poor. Ah, I remember so well when
you were only a Township Officer, the first time we had a house of our
own. How proud we were of our new wicker furniture, and your fountain
pen with the gold clip! And when the young English police officer came
to our house and sat in the best chair and drank a bottle of beer, how
honoured we thought ourselves! Happiness is not in money. What can you
want with more money now?’
‘Nonsense, woman, nonsense! Attend to your cooking and sewing and leave
official matters to those who understand them.’
‘Well, I do not know. I am your wife and have always obeyed you. But at
least it is never too soon to acquire merit. Strive to acquire more
merit, Ko Po Kyin! Will you not, for instance, buy some live fish and
set them free in the river? One can acquire much merit in that way.
Also, this morning when the priests came for their rice they told me
that there are two new priests at the monastery, and they are hungry.
Will you not give them something, Ko Po Kyin? I did not give them
anything myself, so that you might acquire the merit of doing it.’
U Po Kyin turned away from the mirror. The appeal touched him a little.
He never, when it could be done without inconvenience, missed a chance
of acquiring merit. In his eyes his pile of merit was a kind of
bank-deposit, everlastingly growing. Every fish set free in the river,
every gift to a priest, was a step nearer Nirvana. It was a reassuring
thought. He directed that the basket of mangoes brought by the village
headman should be sent down to the monastery.
Presently he left the house and started down the road, with Ba Taik
behind him carrying a file of papers. He walked slowly, very upright to
balance his vast belly, and holding a yellow silk umbrella over his
head. His pink paso glittered in the sun like a satin praline. He was
going to the court, to try his day’s cases.
Public domain in Canada and Hong Kong, where copyright ends fifty years after the author’s death. It may still be under copyright elsewhere: not for use or redistribution outside Canada or Hong Kong.