---
title: "Pseudolus"
author: "Plautus"
translator: "Henry Thomas Riley"
languages: [la, en]
shelf: "Classical Latin"
section: 3 of 4
url: https://scriptura.si/works/plautus-pseudolus/3/
cite: "Plautus, tr. Henry Thomas Riley, Pseudolus, section 3. Scriptura (scriptura.si), https://scriptura.si/works/plautus-pseudolus/3/"
---

# Pseudolus

*Plautus, tr. Henry Thomas Riley*

The trickster slave Pseudolus swindles a pimp to win a girl for his young master.

> Latin: ed. Friedrich Leo, from the Perseus Digital Library (canonical-latinLit, phi0119.phi016, CC BY-SA 4.0).

> English: Henry Thomas Riley, from the Perseus Digital Library (phi0119.phi016.perseus-eng2). Notes are not included.

> Rows follow the references the two texts share (line numbers), cut where both reach the end of a sentence.

## 3. Lines 657–987

Source: https://scriptura.si/works/plautus-pseudolus/3/ · cite a paragraph as https://scriptura.si/works/plautus-pseudolus/3/#p-N

[¶0] HARPAX:
Such is not the fact. But, Syrus, do you know what I request of you?

> Latin: Harpax:
Non ita est. sed scin quid te oro, Sure?

[¶1] PSEUDOLUS:
I shall know, if you tell me.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Sciam si dixeris.

[¶2] HARPAX:
I shall put up outside of the gate here, at the third shop, at the house of that tun-bellied, limping, fat old woman, Chrysis.

> Latin: Harpax:
Ego devortor extra portam huc in tabernam tertiam,
apud anum illam doliarem, claudam crassam, Chrysidem.

[¶3] PSEUDOLUS:
What do you wish then?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Quid nunc vis?

[¶4] HARPAX:
That you’ll fetch me thence when your master comes.

> Latin: Harpax:
Inde ut me arcessas, erus tuos ubi venerit.

[¶5] PSEUDOLUS:
At your pleasure; by all means.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Tuo arbitratu, maxume.

[¶6] HARPAX:
For, as I’ve come wearied off my journey, I wish to refresh myself.

> Latin: Harpax:
Nam ut lassus veni de via,
me volo curare.

[¶7] PSEUDOLUS:
You are very wise, and your plan is agreable to me. But take care, please, that you are not out of the way when I send for you.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Sane sapis et consilium placet.
sed vide sís ne in quaestione sis, quando arcessam, mihi.

[¶8] HARPAX:
Why, when I’ve dined, I shall indulge myself with a nap.

> Latin: Harpax:
Quin ubi prandero, dabo operam somno.

[¶9] PSEUDOLUS:
I quite agree with you.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Sane censeo.

[¶10] HARPAX:
Do you wish aught else?

> Latin: Harpax:
Numquid vis?

[¶11] PSEUDOLUS:
That you’ll be off to take your nap.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Dormitum ut abeas.

[¶12] HARPAX:
I’m off.

> Latin: Harpax:
Abeo.—

[¶13] PSEUDOLUS:
And, do you hear, Harpax? Order yourself to be covered up, please; you’ll receive the benefit if you take a good sweat.
(Exit HARPAX.) (PSEUDOLUS, alone.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Atque audin, Harpage?
iube sis te operiri: beatus éris, si consudaveris.

[¶14] PSEUDOLUS:
Immortal Gods! this man has preserved me by his coming. By his supply for my journey he has brought me from my wanderings quite into the right way. For the Goddess Opportunity herself could not come to me more opportunely,
than has this letter in this opportune manner been brought to me. For this has been brought as a horn of plenty, in which there is whatever I wish for: here are my wiles, here all my tricks, here my stratagems, here my money, here his mistress for my master’s son so much in love. And now how vaunting shall I show myself; how, with a breast so fertile in expedients,
I was to do each thing, how, to steal away the damsel from the procurer, I had all my plans arranged in order in my mind as I desired, fixed, planned out. But, no doubt, thus will it come to pass: this Goddess Fortune, unaided, prevails over the designs of a hundred armed men. And this is the fact, just as each person uses his fortune, so does he surpass others,
and forthwith we all pronounce him wise. When we learn that the counsels of any person have turned out well, we declare that he is a prudent man; but that he is a fool who is unsuccessful. In our folly we know not how much we are mistaken, when we eagerly wish anything to be given to us; as though we ourselves could possibly know what is for our advantage.

> Latin: di immortales, conservavit me illic homo adventu suo.
suo viatico redduxit me usque ex errore in viam.
nam ipsa mi Opportunitas non potuit opportunius
advenire quam haec allatast mi opportune epistula.
nam haec allata cornu copiaest, ubi inest quidquid volo:
hic doli, hic fallaciae omnes, hic sunt sycophantiae,
hic argentum, híc amica amanti erili filio.
atque ego nunc me ut gloriosum faciam et copi pectore:
quo modo quícque agerem, ut lenoni surruperem mulierculam,
iam instituta ornata cuncta in ordine, animo ut volueram,
certa deformata habebam; sed profecto hoc sic erit:
centum doctum hominum consilia sola haec devincit dea,
Fortuna. atque hoc verum est: proinde ut quisque Fortuna utitur,
ita praecellet atque exinde sapere eum omnes dicimus.
bene ubi quoi scimus consilium áccidisse, hominem catum
eum esse declaramus, stultum autem illum quoi vortit male.
stulti hau scimus, frusta ut simus, quom quid cupienter dari
petimus nobis, quasi quid in rem sit possimus noscere.

[¶15] We lose what is certain, while we are seeking what is uncertain. And this comes to pass, amid labours and amid sorrow, that death meanwhile comes creeping on. But there’s enough now of philosophizing; I have been talking too long, and at too great length. Immortal Gods! my lie was not dear at its weight in double-distilled gold, which I just now trumped up here on the spur of the moment,
when I said that I belonged to the procurer. Now, through this letter shall I deceive three persons—my master, and the procurer, and him who gave me this letter. Excellent! another thing as well has happened, that I wished for: see, Calidorus is coming; he is bringing some one with him, I know not whom.
(Stands apart.) (Enter CALIDORUS and CHARINUS.)

> Latin: certa mittimus, dum incerta petimus; atque hoc evenit
in labore atque in dolore, ut mors obrepat interim.
sed iam satis est philosophatum. nimis diu et longum loquor.
di immortales, aurichalco contra non carum fuit
meum mendacium, hic modo quod subito commentus fui,
quia lenonis me esse dixi. nunc ego hac epistula
tris deludam, erum et lenonem et qui hanc dedit mi epistulam.
euge, par pari aliud autem quod cupiebam contigit:
venit eccum Calidorus, ducit nescio quem secum simul.

[¶16] CALIDORUS:
The sweets and the bitters, all have I disclosed to you. You know my love, you know my difficulty, you know my poverty.

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Dulcia atque amara apud te sum elocutus omnia:
scis amorem, scis laborem, scis egestatem meam.

[¶17] CHARINUS:
I well remember all; do you only let me know what you want me to do.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Commemini omnia: id tu modo, me quid vis facere, fac sciam.

[¶18] CALIDORUS:
Pseudolus has directed me thus, that I should bring to him some bold and zealous person.

> Latin: Calidorvs:
[Quom haec tibi alia sum elocutus, vix rem scis de symbolo.]

[¶19] CHARINUS:
You observe your directions well; for you bring him one both friendly and zealous. But this Pseudolus
is a stranger to me.

> Latin: Charinvs:
[Omnia, inquam. tu modo quid me facere vis fac ut sciam.]

[¶20] CALIDORUS:
He is a very clever fellow—he is my contriver. He said that he would effect those things for me that I have told you of.
PSEUDOLUS: (apart.)

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Pseudolus mi ita imperavit, ut aliquem hominem strenuom
benevolentem adducerem ad se.
Charinvs:
Servas imperium probe;
nám et amicum et benevolentem ducis. sed istic Pseudolus
novos mihist.
Calidorvs:
Nimium est mortalis graphicus, †heuretes mihi est.
is mihi haec sese ecfecturum dixit quae dixi tibi.

[¶21] I’ll address this person in a very lofty strain.
CALIDORUS:
Whose voice is it that’s heard here?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Magnufice hominem compellabo.
Calidorvs:
Quoia vox resonat?

[¶22] PSEUDOLUS:
Oh! thee, sovereign lord, thee, oh! thee do I address who dost rule over Pseudolus: thee do I seek, to impart to thee delights thrice three, threefold, acquired by three contrivances,
obtained over three persons through craftiness and through subtlety, which in this very little sealed packet I have brought unto you.
(Holds up the letter.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Io,
io te te, turanne, te te égo, qui imperitas Pseudolo,
quaero, quoi ter trina tríplicia, tríbus modis tria gaudia,
artibus tribus trís demeritas dem laetitias, de tribus
fraude partas per malitiam et per dolum et fallaciam;
in libello hoc obsignato ad te attuli pauxillulo.

[¶23] CALIDORUS:
That’s the fellow;
how the hang-dog does bluster just like a tragedian.

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Illic homost.
Charinvs:
Vt paratragoedat carnufex.

[¶24] PSEUDOLUS:
Advance a step on thy side towards me. Boldly stretch forth thine arm for greeting.
CALIDORUS: (taking his hand.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Confer gradum
contra pariter, porge audacter ad salutem bracchium.

[¶25] Tell me, Pseudolus, whether, as Hope or as Safety, must I greet you?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Dic utrum Spemne an Salutem te salutem, Pseudole?

[¶26] PSEUDOLUS:
Why both.
CALIDORUS:
As both I greet you. But what has been done?
Why are you silent?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Immo utrumque.
Charinvs:
Vtrumque, salve. sed quid actumst?
Psevdolvs:
Quid times?

[¶27] I have carried this person here.
(Pointing to CHARINUS.)
PSEUDOLUS:
How? Carried him here?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Attuli hunc.
Psevdolvs:
Quid, attulisti?

[¶28] CALIDORUS:
Brought, I meant to say.

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Adduxi volui dicere.

[¶29] PSEUDOLUS:
Who’s this person?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Quis istic est?

[¶30] CALIDORUS:
Charinus.

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Charinus.

[¶31] PSEUDOLUS:
Well done; I return him thanks then.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Euge. iam χάριν τούτῳ ποιοῦ.

[¶32] CHARINUS:
Will you then boldly enjoin me what it is necessary to do?

> Latin: Charinvs:
Quin tu si quid opust, mi audacter imperas?

[¶33] PSEUDOLUS:
My thanks, so far. May it be well with you, Charinus; I don’t like that we should be troublesome to you.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Tam gratiast.
bene sit tibi, Charine. nolo tibi molestos esse nos.

[¶34] CHARINUS:
You, troublesome to me? Now, really, that’s troublesome.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Vos molestos mihi? molestumst mi id quidem.

[¶35] PSEUDOLUS:
Well, then, wait a moment.
(Takes the letter out from under his dress.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Tum igitur mane.

[¶36] CALIDORUS:
What’s that?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Quid istuc est?

[¶37] PSEUDOLUS:
This letter have I just now intercepted, and the token.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Epistulam modo hanc íntercepi et sumbolum.

[¶38] CALIDORUS:
Token? What token?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Sumbolum? quem sumbolum?

[¶39] PSEUDOLUS:
The one that was brought just now from the Captain. His servant, who was bringing it, with five mineae of silver, who came to fetch your mistress hence, him I have just now bamboozled.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Qui a milite allatust modo.
eius servos qui hunc ferebat cum quinque argenti minis,
tuam qui amicam hinc arcessebat, éi os sublevi modo.

[¶40] CALIDORUS:
How so?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Quo modo?

[¶41] PSEUDOLUS:
For the sake of these Spectators the play is being performed; they know, who were present here; you I’ll tell at another time.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Horum causa haec agitur spectatorum fabula:
hi sciunt, qui hic adfuerunt; vobis post narravero.

[¶42] CALIDORUS:
What are we to do then?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Quid nunc agimus?

[¶43] PSEUDOLUS:
You shall this day embrace your mistress at liberty.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Liberam hodie tuam amicam amplexabere.

[¶44] CALIDORUS:
What, I?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Egone?

[¶45] PSEUDOLUS:
You yourself.
CALIDORUS:
I?
PSEUDOLUS:
Your own self, I say, if indeed this head shall exist so long; if you’ll only quickly find me out a man.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Tu istic ipsus, inquam, si quidem hoc vivet caput;
si modo mihi hominem invenietis propere.

[¶46] CHARINUS:
Of what description?

> Latin: Charinvs:
Qua facie?

[¶47] PSEUDOLUS:
A cunning,
crafty and clever one, who, when he has once taken hold of the beginning, may by his own ingenuity still hold fast upon what it behoves him to do; one, too, who has not often been seen here.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Malum,
callidum, doctum, qui quando principium prehenderit,
porro sua virtute teneat quid se facere oporteat;
atque qui hic non visitatus saepe sit.

[¶48] CHARINUS:
If he is a slave, does that matter at all?

> Latin: Charinvs:
Si servos est,
numquid refert?

[¶49] PSEUDOLUS:
Why, I’d much rather have him than a free man.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Immo multo mavolo quam liberum.

[¶50] CHARINUS:
I think that I’m able to procure for you a cunning and clever fellow,
that has lately come to my father from Carystus, and hasn’t as yet gone anywhere out the house, and who never visited Athens before yesterday.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Posse opinor me dare hominem tibi malum et doctum domo,
qui a patre advenit Carysto nec dum exiit ex aedibus
quoquam neque Athenas advenit umquam ante hesternum diem.

[¶51] PSEUDOLUS:
You assist in right earnest. But I have need to borrow five minae of silver, which I shall repay this day, for his father (pointing to CALIDORUS) owes it me.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Bene iuvas. sed quinque inventis opus est argenti minis
mutuis, quas hodie reddam: nam huius mihi debet pater.

[¶52] CHARINUS:
I’ll lend it; don’t seek it anywhere else.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Ego dabo, ne quaere aliunde.

[¶53] PSEUDOLUS:
O, how convenient a person for me.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
O hominem opportunum mihi.

[¶54] I have need of a scarf as well, a sword, and a broad-brimmed hat.
CHARINUS:
I can provide them from my house.

> Latin: etiam opust chlamyde et machaera et petaso.
Charinvs:
Possum a me dare.

[¶55] PSEUDOLUS:
Immortal Gods! surely this is not Charinus for me, but Abundance. But this servant, who is come here from Carystus, is there anything in him?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Di immortales, non Charinus míhi hic quidem, sed Copiast.
sed istic servos, ex Carysto qui hic adest, ecquid sapit?

[¶56] CHARINUS:
Plenty of the stinking goat in him.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Hircum ab alis.

[¶57] PSEUDOLUS:
It befits the fellow, then, to have a tunic with long sleeves Has the chap anything sharp in his breast?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Manuleatam tunicam habere hominem addecet.
ecquid is homo habet aceti in pectore?

[¶58] CHARINUS:
Aye, of the very sharpest.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Atque acidissumi.

[¶59] PSEUDOLUS:
But if it is necessary for him to draw forth what is sweet from the same place, has he aught of that?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Quid, si opus sít ut dulce promat indidem, ecquid habet?

[¶60] CHARINUS:
Do you ask that He has wine of myrrh, sweet raisin wine, spice wine honey wine, sweets of every sort. Why, he once began to set up a hot liquor-shop in his breast.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Rogas?
murrinam, passum, defrutum, mellam, mel quoivismodi;
quin in corde instruere quondam coepit pantopolium.

[¶61] PSEUDOLUS:
Bravissimo! Why, Charinus, you beat me cleverly at my own game. But what am I to say is the name of this servant?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Eugepae, lepide, Charine, meo me ludo lamberas.
sed quid nomen esse dicam ego isti servo?

[¶62] CHARINUS:
Simmia.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Simiae.

[¶63] PSEUDOLUS:
In a difficulty, does he understand how to twirl about?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Scitne in re advorsa vorsari?

[¶64] CHARINUS:
A whirlwind is not so ready as he.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Turbo non aeque citust.

[¶65] PSEUDOLUS:
Is he shrewd at all?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Ecquid argutust?

[¶66] CHARINUS:
In mischievous tricks very often.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Malorum facinorum saepissime.

[¶67] PSEUDOLUS:
How, when he’s caught in the fact?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Quid cum manifesto tenetur?

[¶68] CHARINUS:
He’s a very eel; he slips out.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Anguillast, elabitur.

[¶69] PSEUDOLUS:
Is this fellow an experienced one?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Ecquid is homo scitust?

[¶70] CHARINUS:
A public ordinance is not more experienced.

> Latin: Charinvs:
Plebi scitum non est scitius.

[¶71] PSEUDOLUS:
He is a suitable person, according to what I hear you say.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Probus homo est, ut praedicare te audio.

[¶72] CHARINUS:
Aye, and from this you may know it.
When he looks at you he’ll tell, of his own accord, what it is you want with him. But what are you about to do?

> Latin: Charinvs:
Immo si scias,
ubi te aspexerit, narrabit ultro quid sese velis.
sed quid es acturus?

[¶73] PSEUDOLUS:
I’ll tell you. When I’ve dressed up my man, I intend to make him become the pretended servant of the Captain; let him take this token to the procurer, with five minae of silver. There’s the whole plot for you.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Dicam. úbi hominem exornavero,
subditivom fieri ego illum militis servom volo;
sumbolum hunc ferat lenoni cum quinque argenti minis,
mulierem ab lenone abducat: em tibi omnem fabulam.

[¶74] As for the rest, in what way he is to do each thing, I’ll instruct himself.

> Latin: ceterum quo quicque pacto faciat, ipsi dixero.

[¶75] CALIDORUS:
Why, therefore, do we stand here then?

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Quid nunc igitur stamus?

[¶76] PSEUDOLUS:
Bring the fellow to me just now, dressed out with all his accoutrements, to Aeschinus, the banker’s. But make all haste.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Hominem cum ornamentis omnibus
exornatum adducite ad me iam ad trapezitam Aeschinum.
sed properate.

[¶77] CALIDORUS:
We’ll be there before you.

> Latin: Calidorvs:
Prius illi erimus quam tu.—

[¶78] PSEUDOLUS:
Get you gone there quickly. (CALIDORUS and CHARINUS go into SIMO’S house.) Whatever before was uncertain or doubtful in my mind,
is now clear-now fined to the dregs; my heart has now an open path. All my legions will I lead forth under their standards with happy omen with favorable auspices, and to my heart’s content. I have a certainty that I can rout my enemies. Now will I go to the Forum, and load Simmia with my instructions
what he is to do, that he may not be tripping at all, and that he may cleverly lay the train for this plot. Soon now shall I cause the town of this procurer to be carried by storm.
(Exit.) (Enter a BOY from the house of BALLIO.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Abite ergo ocius.
quidquid incerti mi in animo prius aut ambiguom fuit,
nunc liquet, nunc defaecatumst cor mihi; nunc perviumst:
omnes ordine sub signis ducam legiones meas,
avi sinistra, auspicio liquido atque ex ⟨mea⟩ sententia;
confidentia est inimicos meos me posse perdere.
nunc ibo ad forum atque onerabo meis praeceptis Simiam,
quid agat, ne quid titubet, docte ut hanc ferat fallaciam.
iam égo hoc ipsum oppidum expugnatum faxo erit lenonium.

[¶79] A BOY:
On that Boy on whom the Gods bestow servitude under a procurer, when they add a base occupation as well, assuredly do they, so far as I now understand in my mind,
bestow upon him a great misfortune and miseries manifold. Just as this servitude has turned out to me, where I am set over duties great and small; nor am I able to find any admirer to love me, so that at length I might be fitted out in a little better guise.

> Latin: Pver:
Cui servitutem di danunt lenoniam
puero, atque eidem si addunt turpitudinem,
ne illi, quantum ego nunc corde conspicio meo,
malam rem magnam multasque aerumnas danunt.
velut haec mi evenit servitus, ubi ego omnibus
parvis magnisque miseriis praefulcior:
neque ego amatorem mi invenire ullum queo,
qui amet me, ut curer tandem nitidiuscule.

[¶80] Now this day is the birthday of this procurer. The procurer has made a determination, from the lowest to the highest, that if each one does not this day send him a present, he shall perish to-morrow with the greatest torments. Now, faith, I know not what to do in my line,
for, unless I shall send a present to the procurer this day, to-morrow must I swallow down fullers’ produce. And yet I cannot do that which they who can are wont to do. Alas! how little am I, even still for this vocation. And by my troth, now, to my misfortune how fearfully do I dread punishment.
If any one lays on whose hand is too heavy, although they say that it generally is done amid great weeping, I think that I am able in some measure to keep my teeth closed. But I must keep close my lips and my talking, for see, my master is betaking himself home, and bringing a Cook with him.
(Stands at a distance.) (Enter BALLIO and a COOK.)

> Latin: nunc huic lenoni hodie est natalis dies:
interminatus est a minimo ad maximum,
si quis non hodie munus misisset sibi,
eum crás cruciatu maximo perbitere.
nunc nescio hercle rebus quid faciam meis;
neque ego illud possum, quod illi qui possunt solent.
nunc, nisi lenoni munus hodie misero,
cras mihi potandus fructus est fullonius.
eheu, quam illae rei ego etiam nunc sum parvolus.
atque edepol, ut nunc male eúm metuo miser,
si quispiam det qui manus gravior siet,
quamquam illud aiunt magno gemitu fieri,
comprimere dentes videor posse aliquo modo.
sed comprimenda est mihi vox atque oratio:
erus eccum recipit se domum et ducit coquom.

[¶81] BALLIO:
Those who call it the cook’s market, call it so foolishly; for ’tis not a cook’s market, but a thieves’ market. For if, upon oath, I were to seek out the worst of men, I couldn’t have brought a worse one than this fellow that I’m bringing, one, chattering, bragging, silly, and worthless.

> Latin: Ballio:
Forum coquinum qui vocant, stulte vocant,
nam non coquinum est, verum furinum est forum.
nam ego si iuratus peiorem hominem quaererem
coquom, non potui, quam hunc quem duco, ducere,
multiloquom gloriosum insulsum inutilem.

[¶82] Why, for this very reason Orcus has declined to take him to himself, that he might be here to cook a banquet for the dead; for here he is able to cook a thing to please them alone.

> Latin: quin ob eam rem Orcus recipere ad se hunc noluit,
ut esset hic qui mortuis cenam coquat;
nam hic solus illis coquere quod placeat potest.

[¶83] A COOK.:
If you thought of me in this manner that you are mentioning, why did you hire me?
BALLIO:
From scarcity; there wasn’t another.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Si me arbitrabare isto pacto, ut praedicas,
cur conducebas?
Ballio:
Inopia: alius non erat.

[¶84] But why, if you were a cook, were you sitting in the market-place, you alone behind the rest?
A COOK.:
I’ll tell you. By reason of the avarice of men have I become an inferior cook, not through my own inclination.
BALLIO:
For what reason is that?
A COOK.:
I’ll tell you. Because, in fact, directly people come to hire a cook,
no one enquires for him that’s the best and the highest priced: rather do they hire him that’s the lowest priced. Through this have I to-day been the only sitter in the market. Those wretched fellows are for a drachma a-piece; not any person is able to prevail on me to rise for less than a didrachm.

> Latin: sed cur sedebas in foro, si eras coquos,
tu solus praeter alios?
Cocvs:
Ego dicam tibi:
hominum vitio ego sum factus improbior coquos,
non meopte ingenio.
Ballio:
Qua istuc ratione?
Cocvs:
Eloquar.
quia enim, cum extemplo veniunt conductum coquom,
nemo illum quaerit qui optimus et carissimust:
illum conducunt potius qui vilissimust.
hoc ego fui hodie solus obsessor fori.
illi drachmissent miseri: me nemo potest
minoris quisquam nummo ut surgam subigere.

[¶85] I don’t cook a dinner too, like other cooks, who bring me up seasoned meadows of grass upon their dishes; who turn the guests into oxen, and supply the grass. This herbage, too, do they further season with other herbs: put in coriander, fennel, garlick, orage;
they add, too, sorrel, cabbage, beet, and spinach. In this they dissolve a pound weight of asafoetida. The roguish mustard is pounded, which makes the eyes of those that pound it drop tears before they have pounded it. These fellows, when they cook dinners, when they do season them, season them,
not with seasonings, but with vampyre owls which eat out the bowels of the guests while still alive. Through this, in fact, it is, that people here live such short lives, inasmuch as they heap up these herbs of this sort in their stomachs, dreadful to be mentioned, not only to be eaten.

> Latin: non ego item cenam condio ut alii coqui,
qui mihi condita prata in patinis proferunt,
boves quí convivas faciunt herbasque oggerunt,
eas hérbas herbis aliis porro condiunt:
indunt coriandrum, feniculum, alium, atrum holus,
apponunt rumicem, brassicam, betam, blitum,
eo láserpici libram pondo diluont,
teritur sinapis scelera, quae illis qui terunt
prius quám triverunt oculi ut extillent facit.
ei homines cenas ubi coquont, cum condiunt,
non condimentis condiunt, sed strigibus,
vivis convivis intestina quae exedint.
hoc hic quidem homines tam brevem vitam colunt,
quom hasce herbas huius modi in suom alvom congerunt,
formidulosas dictu, non essu modo.

[¶86] Herbage which the cattle eat not, men eat themselves.

> Latin: quas herbas pecudes non edunt, homines edunt.

[¶87] BALLIO:
What do you say? Do you use divine seasonings, by which you can prolong the life of men, you, who find fault with these other seasonings?
A COOK.:
I proclaim it boldly;

> Latin: Ballio:
Quid tu? divinis condimentis utere,
qui prorogare vitam possis hominibus,
qui ea culpes condimenta?
Cocvs:
Audacter dicito;

[¶88] for those who shall eat of my victuals which I have seasoned will be able to exist two hundred years even.

> Latin: nam vel ducenos annos poterunt vivere
meas qui éssitabunt escas quas condivero.

[¶89] For when I’ve put into the saucepan either cicilendrum, or cepolindrum, or mace, or saucaptis, the very dishes become warmed forthwith. These are sauces for fish, the cattle of Neptune;

> Latin: nam egó cocilendrum quando in patinas indidi
aut cepolendrum aut maccidem aut secaptidem,
eaepse sese [patinae] fervefaciunt ilico.
haec ad Neptuni pecudes condimenta sunt:

[¶90] the flesh of the earthly cattle I season with cicimandrum, hapalopsis, or cataractria.
BALLIO:
Now may Jupiter and all the Divinities confound you with your sauces, and with all those lies of yours!

> Latin: terrestris pecudes cicimalindro condio,
hapalocopide aut cataractria.
Ballio:
At te Iuppiter
dique omnes perdant cum condimentis tuis
cumque tuis istis omnibus mendaciis.

[¶91] A COOK.:
Do allow me to speak, please.
BALLIO:
Speak, and go to very perdition.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Sine sis loqui me.
Ballio:
Loquere, atque i in malam crucem.

[¶92] A COOK.:
When all the saucepans are hot, I open them all then does the odour fly towards heaven with its hand hanging down.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Vbi omnes patinae fervont, omnis aperio:
is odos dimissis manibus in caelum volat.

[¶93] BALLIO:
The odour with its hands hanging down?
A COOK.:
I made a mistake without thinking.

> Latin: Ballio:
Odos dimissis manibus?
Cocvs:
Peccavi insciens.

[¶94] BALLIO:
How so?
A COOK.:
With its feet hanging down, I meant to say. Jupiter dines on that odour every day.

> Latin: Ballio:
Quidum?
Cocvs:
Dimissis pedibus volui dicere.
eum odorem cenat Iuppiter cottidie.

[¶95] BALLIO:
If you happen not to go out to cook, pray what does Jupiter dine upon?

> Latin: Ballio:
Si nusquam is coctum, quidnam cenat Iuppiter?

[¶96] A COOK.:
He goes to sleep without his dinner.
BALLIO:
Go to very perdition. Is it for this reason that I’m to give you a didrachm to-day?

> Latin: Cocvs:
It incenatus cubitum.
Ballio:
I in malam crucem.
istacine causa tibi hodie nummum dabo?

[¶97] A COOK.:
Well, I confess that I am a very high-priced cook; but I make the results of my labour to be seen for the price,
hired at which I go out.
BALLIO:
In thieving, to wit.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Fateór equidem esse me coquom carissumum;
verum pro pretio facio ut opera appareat
mea quo conductus venio.
Ballio:
Ad furandum quidem.

[¶98] A COOK.:
And do you expect to meet with any cook except with the claws of a kite or of an eagle?

> Latin: Cocvs:
An tu invenire postulas quemquam coquom
nisi miluinis aut aquilinis ungulis?

[¶99] BALLIO:
And do you expect to go anywhere to cook, and not to cook the dinner there with your claws tied up?

> Latin: Ballio:
An tu coquinatum te ire quoquam postulas,
quin ibi constrictis ungulis cenam coquas?

[¶100] Now, therefore, you boy (to the BOY), who are my servant, I now give you notice to make haste to remove hence all my property; and to keep his eyes as well in your sight. Whichever way he shall look, do you look the same way as well. If he shall move in any direction, do you move as well.

> Latin: nunc adeo tu, qui meus es, iam edico tibi,
ut nostra properes amoliri ómnia,
tum ut huius oculos in oculis habeas tuis:
quoquo hic spectabit, eo tu spectato simul;
si quo hic gradietur, pariter progredimino;

[¶101] If he shall put forth his hand, put you forth your hand as well. If he shall take anything of his own, do you suffer him to take it; if he shall take what’s mine, do you on the other side hold him fast. If he shall stoop to the ground, do you stoop there as well.

> Latin: manum sí protollet, pariter proferto manum:
suom sí quid sumet, id tu sinito sumere;
si nostrum sumet, tu teneto altrinsecus.
si iste ibit, ito, stabit, astato simul;
si conquiniscet istic, conquiniscito.

[¶102] Likewise over your understrappers I shall appoint a single guard a-piece.

> Latin: item his discipulis privos custodes dabo.

[¶103] A COOK.:
Only have good courage.
BALLIO:
Prithee, tell me how I possibly can have good courage, who am taking you home to my house?

> Latin: Cocvs:
Habe módo bonum animum.
Ballio:
Quaeso, qui possum, doce,
bonum animum habere qui te ad me adducam domum?

[¶104] A COOK.:
Because, by my broth, this day will I do just in the way that Medea cooked up the old man Pelias
whom she is said by a draught and by her potions from an aged man to have made young again; so will I make you likewise.
BALLIO:
How now; are you an enchanter as well?

> Latin: Cocvs:
Quia sorbitione faciam ego hodie te mea,
item ut Medea Peliam concoxit senem,
quem medicamento et suis venenis dicitur
fecisse rursus ex sene adulescentulum,
item ego te faciam.
Ballio:
Eho, an etiam es veneficus?

[¶105] A COOK.:
Why no, by my troth, I am rather a preserver of mankind.
BALLIO:
Well now; for how much would you teach me that one point in cooking?

> Latin: Cocvs:
Immo edepol vero hóminum servator.
Ballio:
Ehem,
quanti istuc unum me †coquinare perdoces?

[¶106] A COOK.:
What point?
BALLIO:
That I may preserve you from pilfering anything from me.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Quid?
Ballio:
Vt te servem, ne quid surripias mihi.

[¶107] A COOK.:
For a didrachm, if you believe me; if not, not for a mina even. But whether are you about to-day to give a dinner, to your friends or to your enemies?
BALLIO:
Why, faith, to my friends surely.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Si credis, nummo; si non, ne mina quidem.
sed utrum tu amicis hodie an inimicis tuis
daturu’s es cenam?
Ballio:
Pol ego amicis scilicet.

[¶108] A COOK.:
But why don’t you invite your enemies to it rather than your friends? For this day will I present to the guests a banquet so savoury, and I’ll season it with such a dulcet sweetness, that whoever shall taste each thing that’s seasoned, I’ll make that same person to gnaw off the ends of his own fingers.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Quin tuós inimicos potius quám amicos vocas?
nam ego ita convivis cenam conditam dabo
hodie atque ita suavi suavitate condiam:
ut quisque quicque conditum gustaverit,
ipsus sibi faciam ut digitos praerodat suos.

[¶109] BALLIO:
Troth now, prithee, before you shall present aught to the guests do you yourself first taste, and give some to your understrappers, that you may gnaw off the ends of your own pilfering hands.

> Latin: Ballio:
Quaeso hercle, prius quam quoiquam convivae dabis,
gustato tute prius et discipulis dato,
ut praerodatis vostras furtificas manus.

[¶110] A COOK.:
Perhaps then you don’t believe me in the things that I say.

> Latin: Cocvs:
Fortasse haec tu nunc mihi non credis quae loquor.

[¶111] BALLIO:
Don’t you be troublesome; you din me too much; you don’t please me by it.

> Latin: Ballio:
Molestus ne sis, nimium [iam] tinnis; non taces?

[¶112] See, there I live. (Points to his house.) Do you go in-doors and cook the dinner, with all speed.
A BOY:
Why don’t you go, and take your place? Go and find the guests; the dinner’s spoiling already.
(COOK and BOY go into the house.)
BALLIO:
Now, just look, please, at that young offshoot; for he, too, is a good-for-nothing deputy-scullion for the cook. Truly I don’t know what now first to be on my guard against;
such thieves there are in my house, and there’s a robber close at hand. For my neighbour here, the father of Calidorus, a short time since, in the market-place, asked me by all means to be on my guard against his servant Pseudolus, not to put any trust in him; for that he is on the hunt this day,
if possible to dupe me out of the woman. He said that he had stoutly promised to him that he would get away Phœnicium from me by stratagem. I’ll now go indoors and give notice to my household, that no one must put any trust whatever in this Pseudolus.
(Goes into his house.) (Enter PSEUDOLUS.)

> Latin: em illíc ego habito. íntro abi et cenam coque.
propera.
Pver:
Quin tu is accubitum, et convivas cedo,
corrumpitur iam cena.—
Ballio:
Em, subolem sis vide:
iam hic quoque scelestus est, coqui sublingulo.
profecto quid nunc primum caveam nescio,
ita in aedibus sunt fures, praedo in proxumo est.
nam mi hic vicinus apud forum paulo prius,
pater Calidori, ópere edixit maxumo,
ut mihi caverem a Pseudolo servo suo,
ne fídem ei haberem. nam eum circum ire in hunc diem,
ut me, si posset, muliere intervorteret;
eum prómisisse firmiter dixit sibi,
sese abducturum a me dolis Phoenicium.
nunc ibo intro atque edicam familiaribus,
profecto ne quis quicquam credat Pseudolo.—

[¶113] PSEUDOLUS:
If the immortal Gods ever did determine that any person should be assisted by their aid, now do they intend that Calidorus shall be preserved for me, and the procurer destroyed, inasmuch as they produced you for my assistant, so clever and so knowing a fellow. (Looking back.) But where is he? am I not a silly fellow to be thus talking to myself alone? I’ faith, he has put a trick upon myself, as I fancy; myself one knave, I have been poorly on my guard against another knave.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Si umquám quemquam di immórtales voluére esse auxilio ádiutum,
tum me ét Calidorum sérvatum volunt ésse et lenonem éxtinctum,
quom te ádiutorem génuerunt mihi tám doctum hominem atque ástutum.
sed ubi íllic est? sumne ego homo ínsipiens, qui haec mécum egomet loquar sólus?
dedit vérba mihi hercle, ut opínor:
malus cúm malo stulte cávi.

[¶114] By my troth I’m undone, if this fellow’s off, and I shall not carry into effect this day what I intended. But see, there he is, a statue that deserves a whipping; how stately he does stalk along!
(HARPAX.)

> Latin: tum pól ego interii, homo si ílle abiit, neque hoc ópus quod volui hodie éfficiam.
sed eccúm video verberéam statuam: ut it, út magnifice infert sese.

[¶115] PSEUDOLUS:
How now! By my faith I was looking about for you; I was very greatly afraid that you were off.

> Latin: ehem, te hércle ego circumspéctabam, nimis métuebam male, ne ábiisses.

[¶116] SIMO:
It was my character to do so, I confess.

> Latin: Simia:
Fuit meum ófficium ut facerém, fateor.

[¶117] PSEUDOLUS:
Where were you loitering?

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Vbi réstiteras?

[¶118] SIMO:
Where I pleased.

> Latin: Simo:
Vbi míhi libitum est.

[¶119] PSEUDOLUS:
That I know well enough already.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Istúc … ego sátis scio.

[¶120] SIMO:
Why then do you ask me what you know?

> Latin: Simo:
Quor érgo quod scis mé rogas?

[¶121] PSEUDOLUS:
Why this I want, to put you in mind.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
At hóc volo monére te.

[¶122] SIMO:
Needing to be put in mind yourself, don’t you be putting me in mind.

> Latin: Simo:
Monéndus ne me moneas.

[¶123] PSEUDOLUS:
Really I am treated by you quite with contempt.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Nimis tándem ego aps te contémnor.

[¶124] SIMO:
And why shouldn’t I treat you with contempt, I who have the repute of being a military gentleman?

> Latin: Simo:
Quippe égo te ni contémnam,
stratióticus homo qui clúear?

[¶125] PSEUDOLUS:
I want this then, which has been commenced, to be completed.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Iam hoc vólo quod occeptúmst agi.

[¶126] SIMO:
Do you see me a-doing anything else?

> Latin: Simo:
Numquíd agere aliud mé vides?

[¶127] PSEUDOLUS:
Therefore walk on briskly.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
ámbula ergó cito.

[¶128] SIMO:
No, I choose to go slowly.

> Latin: Simo:
Immo ótiosé volo.

[¶129] PSEUDOLUS:
This is the opportunity; while this Harpax is asleep, I want you to be the first to accost him.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Haéc ea occásiost: dum ílle dormít, volo
tú prior ut óccupes adire.

[¶130] SIMO:
Why are you hurrying? Softly; don’t you fear. I wish Jupiter would so make it, that he were openly in the same place with me, whoever he is, that has arrived from the Captain.

> Latin: Simo:
Quid próperas? placide, né time.
ita ílle faxit Iúppiter,
ut ílle palam ibidem ádsiet,
quisquís illest, qui adest a mílite.

[¶131] Never a jot, by my troth, should he be a bit the better Harpax than I. Have good courage, I’ll have this business nicely accounted for to you. So by my tricks and lies would I put this military stranger in a fright that he himself would deny that he is the person that he is,
and would believe me to be the person that he himself is.
PSEUDOLUS:
How can that be?

> Latin: numquam édepol erit illé potior
Harpáx quam ego. habe animúm bonum:
púlchre ego hanc éxplicatám tibi rém dabo.
síc ego illúm dolis átque mendáciis
ín timorém dabo mílitarem ádvenam,
ípsus sese út neget ésse eum quí siet
méque ut esse aútumet qui ípsus est.
Psevdolvs:
Quí potest?

[¶132] SIMO:
You are murdering me when you ask me that.

> Latin: Simo:
Occídis me, cum istúc rogitas.

[¶133] PSEUDOLUS:
A clever fellow.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
O hóminem lepidum.

[¶134] SIMO:
And so are you too, who are quite my equal with your mischievous tricks and lies …

> Latin: Simo:
Té quoque etiám dolis átque mendáciis,
quí magistér mihi es, ántidibo, út scias.

[¶135] PSEUDOLUS:
May Jupiter preserve you for me.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Iúppiter té mihi sérvet.

[¶136] SIMO:
Aye, and for myself.

> Latin: Simo:
Immó mihi.

[¶137] But look, does this dress become me quite well?
PSEUDOLUS:
It suits very well.

> Latin: séd vide, ornátus hic me satin cóndecet?
Psevdolvs:
Optúme habet.

[¶138] SIMO:
Be it so.

> Latin: Simo:
Esto.

[¶139] PSEUDOLUS:
May the Deities grant you as many blessings as you may wish for yourself. For if I were to wish for as many as you are deserving of, they would be less than nothing; (aside) nor have I ever seen any one more of a rogue than this fellow.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Tantúm tibi boni di immórtales duint quántum tu tibi óptes;
nam si éxoptem, quantúm dignu’s es tantúm dent, minus nihiló sit.
néque ego hoc homine quémquam vidi mágis malum et máleficum.

[¶140] SIMO: (overhearing him.)
Do you say that to me?

> Latin: Simo:
Tun íd mihi?
Psevdolvs:
Taceo.
sed egó quae tibi bona dábo et faciam, si hanc sóbrie rem accurássis.
Simo:
Potin út taceas? memorem ímmemorem facit quí monet quod memor méminit.
teneo, ómnia in pectore cóndita sunt, meditáti sunt mihi dóli docte.

[¶141] PSEUDOLUS:
This man’s an honest fellow.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Probus ést hic homo.

[¶142] SIMO:
It is neither this person, then (pointing to PSEUDOLUS), nor myself.

> Latin: Simo:
Neque hic ést neque ego.

[¶143] PSEUDOLUS:
But take care that you don’t be tripping.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
At vide né titubes.

[¶144] SIMO:
Can’t you hold your tongue? He that puts a man in mind of that which, remembering it, he does keep in mind, causes him to forget it. I recollect everything; they are stored up in my breast; my plans are cleverly laid.

> Latin: Simo:
Potin út taceas?

[¶145] PSEUDOLUS:
I’m silent. But what good turn shall I do you if you carry through this matter with management?
So may the Gods love me—

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Ita mé di ament—

[¶146] SIMO:
They won’t do so; you’ll be uttering sheer falsehoods then.

> Latin: Simo:
Ita nón facient: mera iám mendacia fúndes.

[¶147] PSEUDOLUS:
How I do love you, Simmia, for your roguery, and both fear and laud you.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Vt ego ób tuam, Simia, pérfidiam te amo et métuo et magni fácio.

[¶148] SIMO:
That I have learned to make a present of to others; you can’t put your flatteries on me.

> Latin: Simo:
Ego istúc aliis dare cóndidici: mi optrúdere non potes pálpum.

[¶149] PSEUDOLUS:
In how delightful a manner I shall receive you this day, when you have completed this matter.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Vt ego áccipiam te hodié lepide, ubi efféceris hoc opus,

[¶150] SIMO:
Ha, ha, ha!
(Laughing.)

> Latin: Simo:
Há ha hae.

[¶151] PSEUDOLUS:
With nice viands, wine, perfumes, and titbits between our cups. There, too, shall be a charming damsel, who shall give you kiss upon kiss.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Lepidó victu, vino, únguentis et intér pocula pulpámentis;
ibidem úna aderit muliér lepida, tibi sávia super savía quae det.

[¶152] SIMO:
You will be receiving me in a delightful manner.

> Latin: Simo:
Lepide áccipis me.

[¶153] PSEUDOLUS:
Aye, and if you effect it, then I’ll make you say so still more.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Immo si éfficies, tum fáxo magis ⟨id⟩ dícas.

[¶154] SIMO:
If I don’t effect it, do you, the executioner, take me off to torture. But make haste and point out to me where is the door of the procurer’s house.

> Latin: Simo:
Nisi effécero, cruciabíliter cárnifex me accipito.
séd propera mihi mónstrare, ubi sit ós lenonis aédium.

[¶155] PSEUDOLUS:’Tis the third hence.
SIMO:
Hist! hush! the door’s opening.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Tertium hoc est.
Simo:
St, tace, aedes hiscunt.

[¶156] PSEUDOLUS:
In my mind, I believe that the house is poorly.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Credo, animo malest
aedibus.

[¶157] SIMO:
Why so?

> Latin: Simo:
Quid iam?

[¶158] PSEUDOLUS:
Because, i’ faith, it is vomiting forth the procurer.
(BALLIO is coming out of his house.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Quia edepol ipsum lenonem evomunt.

[¶159] SIMO:
Is this he?

> Latin: Simo:
Illicinest?

[¶160] PSEUDOLUS:
This is his own self.
SIMO:’Tis a worthless commodity.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Illic ést.
Simo:
Mala mercist …

[¶161] PSEUDOLUS:
Do see that: he doesn’t go straight, but sideways, just as a crab is wont.
(They conceal themselves from BALLIO.) (Enter BALLIO from his house.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Illuc sis vide,
ut transversus, non proversus cedit, quasi cancer solet.

[¶162] BALLIO:
I do believe that this fellow is not so bad a cook as I thought he was; for he has clawed off nothing as yet except a cup and a tankard.
PSEUDOLUS: (apart to SIMMIA.)

> Latin: Ballio:
Mínus malum hunc hominem esse opinor quam esse censebam coquom,
nam nihil etiam dum harpagavit praeter cyathum et cantharum.

[¶163] Hallo you! now’s your opportunity and your time.
SIMO:
I agree with you.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Heus tu, nunc occasio est et tempus.
Simo:
Tecum sentio.

[¶164] PSEUDOLUS:
Step slily out into the street; I’ll be here in ambush.
(SIMMIA steps forward, and then walks along the middle of the street to meet BALLIO.)

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Ingredere in viam dolose: ego hic in insidiis ero.

[¶165] SIMO: (talking aloud to himself.)
I took the number carefully; this is the sixth lane from the city gate; down that lane he bade me turn; how many houses down he told me, that I don’t quite know for certain.
BALLIO: (eyeing SIMMIA.)

> Latin: Simo:
Habui numerum sedulo: hoc est sextum a porta proxumum
angiportum, in id angiportum me devorti iusserat;
quotumas aedis dixerit, id ego admodum incerto scio.

[¶166] Who’s this fellow in the scarf, or whence does he come, or whom is he looking for? The appearance of the fellow seems outlandish and shabby.

> Latin: Ballio:
Quis hic homo chlamydatus est aut unde est aut quem quaeritat?
peregrina facies videtur hominis atque ignobilis.

[¶167] SIMO:
But see, here’s a person, who, from uncertainty, will make the thing more certain for me that I wish to know.

> Latin: Simo:
Sed eccum qui ex incerto faciet mihi quod quaero certius.

[¶168] BALLIO:
He’s coming straight towards me. Where in the world am I to say this fellow comes from?

> Latin: Ballio:
Ad me adit recta. unde ego hominem hunc esse dicam gentium?

[¶169] SIMO:
Harkye! you who are standing there with a goat’s beard, answer me this that I ask you.

> Latin: Simo:
Heus tu, qui cum hirquina barba stas, responde quod rogo.

[¶170] BALLIO:
How now! Don’t you salute me first?

> Latin: Ballio:
Eho, an non príus salutas?

[¶171] SIMO: (with a surly voice.)
I have no salutations to give away.

> Latin: Simo:
Nulla est mihi salus dataria.

[¶172] BALLIO:
Well, troth, you shall get just as much from here then.

> Latin: Ballio:
Nam pol hinc tantumdem accipies.

[¶173] PSEUDOLUS: (from behind.)
Well done, at the very beginning.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Iam inde a principio probe.

[¶174] SIMO:
Do you know any person in this lane, I ask you?

> Latin: Simo:
Ecquem in angiporto hoc hominem tu novisti? te rogo.

[¶175] BALLIO:
I know myself.

> Latin: Ballio:
Egomet me.

[¶176] SIMO:
Few persons do that which you mention; for in the Forum there is hardly every tenth person that knows his own self.
PSEUDOLUS: (from behind.)

> Latin: Simo:
Pauci istuc faciunt homines quod tu praedicas,
nam in foro vix decumus quisque est qui ipsus sese noverit.

[¶177] I’m all right; he is philosophizing now.
SIMO:
I’m looking for a fellow here, a bad one,
a law breaker, an impious, perjured, and dishonest rogue.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Salvos sum, iam philosophatur.
Simo:
Hominem ego hic quaero malum,
legirupam, impurum, peiurum atque impium.

[¶178] BALLIO: (aside.)
He’s looking for me, for those are my titles If he would only mention the name. (To SIMMIA.) What’s the name of this person?

> Latin: Ballio:
Me quaeritat,
nam illa mea sunt cognomenta; nomen si memoret modo.
quid est ei homini nomen?

[¶179] SIMO:
Ballio, the procurer.

> Latin: Simo:
Leno Ballio.

[¶180] BALLIO:
Do I know him? I am the very person, young man, that you are looking for.

> Latin: Ballio:
Scivin ego?
ipse ego is sum, adulescens, quem tu quaeris.

[¶181] SIMO:
What, are you Ballio?

> Latin: Simo:
Tune es Ballio?

[¶182] BALLIO:
I really am he.

> Latin: Ballio:
Ego enim vero is sum.

[¶183] SIMO:
How you are clothed, a housebreaker …
(He takes hold of BALLIO’S cloak.)

> Latin: Simo:
Vt vestitu’s es, es perfossor parietum.

[¶184] BALLIO:
I think if you were to see me in the dark, you’d be keeping your hand off.

> Latin: Ballio:
Credo, in tenebris, conspicatus si sis me, apstineas manum.

[¶185] SIMO:
My master bade me present you many greetings. Receive this letter from me; he bade me give you it.

> Latin: Simo:
Erus meus tibi me salutem multam voluit dicere.
hanc epistulam accipe a me, hanc mé tibi iussit dare.

[¶186] BALLIO:
Who’s the person that bade you?

> Latin: Ballio:
Quis is homost qui iussit?

[¶187] PSEUDOLUS: (from behind.)
I’m undone, now the fellow’s in the middle of the mud.

> Latin: Psevdolvs:
Perii, nunc homo in medio lutost;

[¶188] He doesn’t know the name—this business is at a dead lock.
BALLIO:
Who do you say sent me this?

> Latin: nomen nescit, haeret haec res.
Ballio:
Quem hanc misisse ad me autumas?

[¶189] SIMO:
Observe the seal; do you yourself tell me his name, that I may know that you are Ballio himself.

> Latin: Simo:
Nosce imaginem: tute eius nomen memorato mihi,
ut sciam te Ballionem esse ipsum.

[¶190] BALLIO:
Give me the letter.

> Latin: Ballio:
Cedo mi epistulam.