There was no stain on his reputation for chastity except his intimacy with King Nicomedes, but that was a deep and lasting reproach, which laid him open to insults from every quarter. I say nothing of the notorious lines of Licinius Calvus: Whate’er Bithynia had, and Caesar’s paramour. I pass over, too, the invectives of Dolabella and the elder Curio, in which Dolabella calls him the queen’s rival, the inner partner of the royal couch, and Curio, the brothel of Nicomedes and the stew of Bithynia.
Pudicitiae eius famam nihil quidem praeter Nicomedis contubernium laesit, gravi tamen et perenni obprobrio et ad omnium convicia exposito. Omitto Calvi Licini notissimos versus: Bithynia quicquid et pedicatorpedicator] predicator, Ω. Caesaris umquam habuit. Praetereo actiones Dolabellae et Curionis patris, in quibus eum Dolabella paelicem reginae, spondam interiorem regiae lecticae, at Curio stabulum Nicomedis et Bithynicum fornicem dicunt.
I take no account of the edicts of Bibulus, in which he posted his colleague as the queen of Bithynia, saying that of yore he was enamoured of a king, but now of a king’s estate. At this same time, so Marcus Brutus declares, one Octavius, a man whose disordered mind made him somewhat free with his tongue, after saluting Pompey as king in a crowded assembly, greeted Caesar as queen But Gaius Memmius makes the direct charge that he acted as cup-bearer to Nicomedes with the rest of his wantons at a large dinner-party, and that among the guests were some merchants from Rome, whose names Memmius gives.
Missa etiam facio edicta Bibuli, quibus proscripsit: collegam suum Bithynicam reginam, eique antea regem fuisse cordi, nunc esse regnum. Quo tempore, ut Marcus Brutus refert, Octavius etiam quidam valitudine mentis liberius dicax conventu maximo, cum Pompeium regem appellasset, ipsum reginam salutavit. Sed C. Memmius etiam ad cyathum et vinumet vinum, Y'; et vina, G; et vi, MVL²δ. Nicomedi stetisse obicit, cum reliquis exoletis, pleno convivio, accubantibus nonnullis urbicis negotiatoribus, quorum refert nomina.
Cicero, indeed, is not content with having written in sundry letters that Caesar was led by the king’s attendants to the royal apartments, that he lay on a golden couch arrayed in purple, and that the virginity of this son of Venus was lost in Bithynia; but when Caesar was once addressing the senate in defence of Nysa, daughter of Nicomedes, and was enumerating his obligations to the king, Cicero cried: No more of that, pray, for it is well known what he gave you, and what you gave him in turn.
Cicero vero non contentus in quibusdam epistulis scripsisse a satellitibus eum in cubiculum regium eductum in aureo lecto veste purpurea decubuisse floremque aetatis a Venere orti in Bithynia contaminatum, quondam etiam in senatu defendenti ei Nysae causam, filiae Nicomedis, beneficiaque regis in se commemoranti: Remove, inquit, istaec, oro te, quando notum est, et quid ille tibi et quid illi tute dederis.
Finally, in his Gallic triumph his soldiers, among the bantering songs which are usually sung by those who follow the chariot, shouted these lines, which became a by-word: All the Gauls did Caesar vanquish, Nicomedes vanquished himLo! now Caesar rides in triumph, victor over all the Gauls, Nicomedes does not triumph, who subdued the conqueror.
Gallico denique triumpho milites eius inter cetera carmina, qualia currum prosequentes ioculariter canunt, etiam illud vulgatissimum pronuntiaverunt: Gallias Caesar subegit, Nicomedes Caesarem:Ecce Caesar nunc triumphat qui subegit Gallias, The second line is omitted by MHGVPO'δ, while Q (and e in the margin) addEt quare triumphat Caesar qui subegit Gallias ? Nicomedes non triumphat qui subegit Caesarem. Nicomedes non triumphat qui subegit Caesarem