1. DIOGENES: Why, Carian, are you so proud, and expect to be honoured above all of us? MAUSOLUS: Firstly, Sinopean, because of my royal position. I was king of all Caria, ruler also of part of Lydia, subdued some islands, too, and advanced as far as Miletus, subjugating most of Ionia. Moreover, I was handsome and tall and mighty in war. But, most important of all, I have lying over me in Halicarnassus a vast memorial, outdoing that of any other of the dead not only in size but also in its finished beauty, with horses and men reproduced most perfectly in the fairest marble, so that it would be difficult to find even a temple like it. Don’t you think I’ve a right to be proud of these things?
1. ΔΙΟΓΕΝΗΣ: Ὠ Κάρ, ἐπὶ τίνι μέγα φρονεῖς καὶ πάντων ἡμῶν προτιμᾶσθαι ἀξιοῖς; ΜΑΥΣΩΛΟΣ: Καὶ ἐπὶ τῇ βασιλείᾳ μέν, ὦ Σινωπεῦ, ὃς ἐβασίλευσα Καρίας μὲν ἁπάσης, ἦρξα δὲ καὶ Λυδῶν ἐνίων καὶ νήσους δέ τινας ὑπηγαγόμην καὶ ἄχρι Μιλήτου ἐπέβην τὰ πολλὰ τῆς Ἰωνίας καταστρεφόμενος· καὶ καλὸς ἦν καὶ μέγας καὶ ἐν πολέμοις καρτερός· τὸ δὲ μέγιστον, ὅτι ἐν Ἁλικαρνασσῷ μνῆμα παμμέγεθες ἔχω ἐπικείμενον, ἡλίκον οὐκ ἄλλος νεκρός, ἀλλ’ οὐδὲ οὕτως ἐς κάλλος ἐξησκημένον, ἵππων καὶ ἀνδρῶν ἐς τὸ ἀκριβέστατον εἰκασμένων λίθου τοῦ καλλίστου, οἷον οὐδὲ νεὼν εὕροι τις ἂν ῥᾳδίως. οὐ δοκῶ σοι δικαίως ἐπὶ τούτοις μέγα φρονεῖν;
2. DIOGENES: Of your royal position, you say, and your beauty, and the weight of your tomb? MAUSOLUS: Good heavens, yes.
2. ΔΙΟΓΕΝΗΣ: Ἐπὶ τῇ βασιλείᾳ φῄς καὶ τῷ κάλλει καὶ τῷ βάρει τοῦ τάφου; ΜΑΥΣΩΛΟΣ: Νὴ Δί' ἐπὶ τούτοις.
DIOGENES: But, my handsome Mausolus, the strength and the beauty you mention aren’t still with you here. If we chose a judge of beauty, I can’t see why your skull should be thought better than mine. Both of them are bald and bare, both of us show our teeth in the same way, and have lost our eyes, and have snub noses now. Perhaps your tomb and all that costly marble may give the people of Halicarnassus something to show off, and they can boast to strangers of the magnificent building they have, but I can’t see what good it is to you, my good fellow, unless you’re claiming that, with all that marble pressing down on you, you have a heavier burden to bear than any of us.
ΔΙΟΓΕΝΗΣ: Ἀλλ', ὦ καλὲ Μαύσωλε, οὔτε ἡ ἰσχὺς ἔτι σοι ἐκείνη οὔτε ἡ μορφὴ πάρεστιν· εἰ γοῦν τινα ἑλοίμεθα δικαστὴν εὐμορφίας πέρι, οὐκ ἔχω εἰπεῖν, τίνος ἕνεκα τὸ σὸν κρανίον προτιμηθείη ἂν τοῦ ἐμοῦ· φαλακρὰ γὰρ ἄμφω καὶ γυμνά, καὶ τοὺς ὀδόντας ὁμοίως προφαίνομεν καὶ τοὺς ὀφθαλμοὺς ἀφῃρήμεθα καὶ τὰς ῥῖνας ἀποσεσιμώμεθα. ὁ δὲ τάφος καὶ οἱ πολυτελεῖς ἐκεῖνοι λίθοι Ἁλικαρνασσεῦσι μὲν ἴσως εἶεν ἐπιδείκνυσθαι καὶ φιλοτιμεῖσθαι πρὸς τοὺς ξένους, ὡς δή τι μέγα οἰκοδόμημα αὐτοῖς ἐστιν· σὺ δέ, ὦ βέλτιστε, οὐχ ὁρῶ ὅ τι ἀπολαύεις αὐτοῦ, πλὴν εἰ μὴ τοῦτο φῄς, ὅτι μᾶλλον ἡμῶν ἀχθοφορεῖς ὑπὸ τηλικούτοις λίθοις πιεζόμενος.
3. MAUSOLUS: Will all that, then, be of no good to me? Will Mausolus and Diogenes be on an equal footing? DIOGENES: No indeed, your excellency; we shan’t be on an equal footing. Mausolus will groan when he remembers the things on earth above, which he thought brought him happiness, while Diogenes will be able to laugh at him. Mausolus will talk of the tomb erected to him at Halicarnassus by his wife and sister, Artemisia, whereas Diogenes has no idea whether he even has a tomb for his body, for he didn’t care about that, but he has left for the best of those who come after the report that he has lived the life of a man, a life, most servile of Carians, that towers above your memorial, and is built on surer foundations.
3. ΜΑΥΣΩΛΟΣ: Ἀνόνητα οὖν μοι ἐκεῖνα πάντα καὶ ἰσότιμος ἔσται Μαύσωλος καὶ Διογένης; ΔΙΟΓΕΝΗΣ: Οὐκ ἰσότιμος, ὦ γενναιότατε, οὐ γὰρ· Μαύσωλος μὲν γὰρ οἰμώξεται μεμνημένος τῶν ὑπὲρ γῆς, ἐν οἷς εὐδαιμονεῖν ᾤετο, Διογένης δὲ καταγελάσεται αὐτοῦ. καὶ τάφον ὁ μὲν ἐν Ἁλικαρνασσῷ ἐρεῖ ἑαυτοῦ ὑπὸ Ἀρτεμισίας τῆς γυναικὸς καὶ ἀδελφῆς κατεσκευασμένον, ὁ Διογένης δὲ τοῦ μὲν σώματος εἰ καί τινα τάφον ἔχει οὐκ οἶδεν· οὐδὲ γὰρ ἔμελεν αὐτῷ τούτου· λόγον δὲ τοῖς ἀρίστοις περὶ τούτου καταλέλοιπεν ἀνδρὸς βίον βεβιωκὼς ὑψηλότερον, ὦ Καρῶν ἀνδραποδωδέστατε, τοῦ σοῦ μνήματος καὶ ἐν βεβαιοτέρῳ χωρίῳ κατεσκευασμένον.