1. ZEUS: Plague take all philosophers who say that bliss is to be found only among the gods! If they but knew all that we endure for the sake of men, they would not envy us our nectar and ambrosia, putting their trust in Homer, a blind man and a fraud, who called us blissful and told about what is in heaven when he could not even see what is on earth. Here is an example right at hand: Helius puts his team to his chariot and traverses the sky all day long, clad in a garment of fire and resplendent with rays, not even getting leisure enough to scratch his ear, as they say: for if he unconsciously relaxes the least bit, his horses run away, turn out of the road, and burn everything up. Selene, too, goes about without a wink of sleep, giving light to night-roisterers and people returning late from dinners. Apollo, again, has taken up a very active profession, and has been deafened almost completely by people besetting him with requests for prophecies. One moment he has to be in Delphi; the next, he runs to Colophon; from there he crosses to Xanthus, and again at full speed to Delos or to Branchidae. In a word, wherever his prophetess, after drinking from the holy well and chewing laurel and setting the tripod ashake, bids him appear, there is no delaying—he must present himself immediately to reel off his prophecies, or else it is all up with his reputation in the profession. I say nothing of the devices they get up to test his powers of divination, cooking mutton and turtle together, so that if he had not a good nose, that Lydian would have gone off laughing at him. As for Asclepius, he is pestered by the sick: “Dire sights he sees, and touches what he loathes, and in the woes of others finds a crop of sorrow for himself.” Why should I refer either to the Winds, that aid the crops and speed the ships on their courses and blow upon the winnowers, or to Sleep, that wings his way to everyone, or to Jack-of-dreams, that keeps vigil all night long with Sleep and serves as his interpreter? All this work the gods do out of love for man, each contributing to life on earth.
1. Ζεύς: ἀλλʼ ἐπιτριβεῖεν ὁπόσοι τῶν φιλοσόφων παρὰ μόνοις τὴν εὐδαιμονίαν φασὶν εἶναι τοῖς θεοῖς. εἰ γοῦν ᾔδεσαν ὁπόσα τῶν ἀνθρώπων ἕνεκα πάσχομεν, οὐκ ἂν ἡμᾶς τοῦ νέκταρος ἢ τῆς ἀμβροσίας ἐμακάριζον Ὁμήρῳ πιστεύσαντες ἀνδρὶ τυφλῷ καὶ γόητι, μάκαρας ἡμᾶς καλοῦντι καὶ τὰ ἐν οὐρανῷ διηγουμένῳ, ὃς οὐδὲ τὰ ἐν τῇ γῇ καθορᾶν ἐδύνατο. αὐτίκα γέ τοι ὁ μὲν Ἥλιος οὑτοσὶ ζευξάμενος τὸ ἅρμα πανήμερος τὸν οὐρανὸν περιπολεῖ πῦρ ἐνδεδυκὼς καὶ τῶν ἀκτίνων ἀποστίλβων, οὐδʼ ὅσον κνήσασθαι τὸ οὖς, φασί, σχολὴν ἄγων· ἢν γάρ τι κἂν ὀλίγον ἐπιρρᾳθυμήσας λάθῃ, ἀφηνιάσαντες οἱ ἵπποι καὶ τῆς ὁδοῦ παρατραπόμενοι κατέφλεξαν τὰ πάντα. ἡ Σελήνη δὲ ἄγρυπνος καὶ αὐτὴ περίεισιν φαίνουσα τοῖς κωμάζουσιν καὶ τοῖς ἀωρὶ ἀπὸ τῶν δείπνων ἐπανιοῦσιν. ὁ Ἀπόλλων τε αὖ πολυπράγμονα τὴν τέχνην ἐπανελόμενος ὀλίγου δεῖν τὰ ὦτα ἐκκεκώφηται πρὸς τῶν ἐνοχλούντων κατὰ χρείαν τῆς μαντικῆς, καὶ ἄρτι μὲν αὐτῷ ἐν Δελφοῖς ἀναγκαῖον εἶναι, μετʼ ὀλίγον δὲ εἰς Κολοφῶνα θεῖ, κἀκεῖθεν εἰς Ξάνθον μεταβαίνει καὶ δρομαῖος αὖθις εἰς Δῆλον ἢ εἰς Βραγχίδας· καὶ ὅλως ἔνθα ἂν ἡ πρόμαντις πιοῦσα τοῦ ἱεροῦ νάματος καὶ μασησαμένη τῆς δάφνης καὶ τὸν τρίποδα διασείσασα κελεύῃ παρεῖναι, ἄοκνον χρὴ αὐτίκα μάλα παρεστάναι συνείροντα τοὺς χρησμοὺς ἢ οἴχεσθαί οἱ τὴν δόξαν τῆς τέχνης. ἐῶ γὰρ λέγειν ὁπόσα ἐπὶ πείρᾳ τῆς μαντικῆς ἐπιτεχνῶνται αὐτῷ ἄρνεια κρέα καὶ χελώνας εἰς τὸ αὐτὸ ἕψοντες, ὥστε εἰ μὴ τὴν ῥῖνα ὀξὺς ἦν, κἂν ἀπῆλθεν αὐτοῦ ὁ Λυδὸς καταγελῶν. ὁ μὲν γὰρ Ἀσκληπιὸς ὑπὸ τῶν νοσούντων ἐνοχλούμενος ὁρῇ τε δεινὰ θιγγάνει τε ἀηδέων ἐπʼ ἀλλοτρίῃσί τε συμφορῇσιν ἰδίας καρποῦται λύπας. τί γὰρ ἂν ἢ τοὺς Ἀνέμους φυτουργοῦντας λέγοιμι καὶ παραπέμποντας τὰ πλοῖα καὶ τοῖς λικμῶσιν ἐπιπνέοντας, ἢ τὸν Ὕπνον ἐπὶ πάντας πετόμενον, ἢ τὸν Ὄνειρον μετὰ τοῦ Ὕπνου διανυκτερεύοντα καὶ ὑποφητεύοντα αὐτῷ; πάντα γὰρ ταῦτα ὑπὸ φιλανθρωπίας οἱ θεοὶ πονοῦσιν, πρὸς τὸν ἐπὶ τῆς γῆς βίον ἕκαστος συντελοῦντες.
2. ZEUS: And yet the others are not so badly off in comparison with myself. I am the monarch and father of all: but how many discomforts I put up with and how many bothers I have, distracted as I am by such a number of things to think of! First, I must oversee the work of all the other gods who help me in any way in administering my sovereignty, in order that they may not be remiss in it. Then I myself have to do any number of tasks that are almost impossible to carry out on account of their minuteness; for it is not to be supposed that I simply manage and direct in person the principal features of my administration, such as rain, hail, wind, and lightning, and that then I am through, being dispensed from thinking of details. No, not only must I do all that, but I must look in all directions at the same time and keep an eye on everybody, just like the herdsman at Nemea, to see who is stealing, who is committing perjury, who is offering sacrifice, whether anybody has poured a drinkoffering, from what quarter the steam and the smoke of burnt-offerings rise, who has called upon me in sickness or at sea. What is most laborious of all, at one and the same moment I must attend the great sacrifice at Olympia, keep an eye on the armies at war near Babylon, send hail in the country of the Getae, and attend a banquet among the Ethiopians. At that, it is not easy to escape criticism. It often happens that the others, “the gods and the warriors crested with horse-tails,” sleep all through the night, while I, though Zeus, am not “held in the sweetness of slumber,” for if I drowse off, even for an instant, Epicurus is instantly confirmed in his assertion that we exercise no providence over what happens on earth. And we cannot make light of the danger if men are going to take his word for this’: our temples will have no wreaths, our wayside shrines no savoury steam, our wine-bowls no drink-offerings, our altars will be cold, and in short there will be general dearth of sacrifices and oblations, and famine will be rife. For that reason, like the master of a ship, I stand by myself high up on the stern with the tiller in my hands, and everybody else aboard gets drunk, perhaps, and goes to sleep, whereas I, without closing my eyes or eating, “ponder in heart and in soul” for the benefit of all, rewarded only by being considered captain.
2. Ζεύς: καίτοι τὰ μὲν τῶν ἄλλων μέτρια· ἐγὼ δὲ αὐτὸς ὁ πάντων βασιλεὺς καὶ πατὴρ ὅσας μὲν ἀηδίας ἀνέχομαι, ὅσα δὲ πράγματα ἔχω πρὸς τοσαύτας φροντίδας διῃρημένος· ᾧ πρῶτα μὲν τὰ τῶν ἄλλων θεῶν ἔργα ἐπισκοπεῖν ἀναγκαῖον ὁπόσοι τι ἡμῖν συνδιαπράττουσι τῆς ἀρχῆς, ὡς μὴ βλακεύωσιν ἐν αὐτοῖς, ἔπειτα δὲ καὶ αὐτῷ μυρία ἄττα πράττειν καὶ σχεδὸν ἀνέφικτα ὑπὸ λεπτότητος· οὐ γὰρ μόνον τὰ κεφάλαια ταῦτα τῆς διοικήσεως, ὑετοὺς καὶ χαλάζας καὶ πνεύματα καὶ ἀστραπὰς αὐτὸς οἰκονομησάμενος καὶ διατάξας πέπαυμαι τῶν ἐπὶ μέρους φροντίδων ἀπηλλαγμένος, ἀλλά με δεῖ καὶ ταῦτα μὲν ποιεῖν ἀποβλέπειν δὲ κατὰ τὸν αὐτὸν χρόνον ἁπανταχόσε καὶ πάντα ἐπισκοπεῖν ὥσπερ τὸν ἐν τῇ Νεμέᾳ βουκόλον, τοὺς κλέπτοντας, τοὺς ἐπιορκοῦντας, τοὺς θύοντας, εἴ τις ἔσπεισε, πόθεν ἡ κνῖσα καὶ ὁ καπνὸς ἀνέρχεται, τίς νοσῶν ἢ πλέων ἐκάλεσεν, καὶ τὸ πάντων ἐπιπονώτατον, ὑφʼ ἕνα καιρὸν ἔν τε Ὀλυμπίᾳ τῇ ἑκατόμβῃ παρεῖναι καὶ ἐν Βαβυλῶνι τοὺς πολεμοῦντας ἐπισκοπεῖν καὶ ἐν Γέταις χαλαζᾶν καὶ ἐν Αἰθίοψιν εὐωχεῖσθαι. τὸ δὲ μεμψίμοιρον οὐδὲ οὕτω διαφυγεῖν ῥᾴδιον, ἀλλὰ πολλάκις οἱ μὲν ἄλλοι θεοί τε καὶ ἀνέρες ἱπποκορυσταὶ εὕδουσι παννύχιοι, τὸν Δία δὲ ἐμὲ οὐκ ἔχει νήδυμος ὕπνος· ἢν γάρ τί που καὶ μικρὸν ἐπινυστάσωμεν, ἀληθὴς εὐθὺς ὁ Ἐπίκουρος, ἀπρονοήτους ἡμᾶς ἀποφαίνων τῶν ἐπὶ γῆς πραγμάτων. καὶ ὁ κίνδυνος οὐκ εὐκαταφρόνητος εἰ ταῦτα οἱ ἄνθρωποι πιστεύσουσιν αὐτῷ, ἀλλʼ ἀστεφάνωτοι μὲν ἡμῖν οἱ ναοὶ ἔσονται, ἀκνίσωτοι δὲ αἱ ἀγυιαί, ἄσπονδοι δὲ οἱ κρατῆρες, ψυχροὶ δὲ οἱ βωμοί, καὶ ὅλως ἄθυτα καὶ ἀκαλλιέρητα πάντα καὶ ὁ λιμὸς πολύς. τοιγαροῦν ὥσπερ οἱ κυβερνῆται ὑψηλὸς μόνος ἐπὶ τῆς πρύμνης ἕστηκα τὸ πηδάλιον ἔχων ἐν ταῖν χεροῖν, καὶ οἱ μὲν ἐπιβάται μεθύοντες εἰ τύχοι ἐγκαθεύδουσιν, ἐγὼ δὲ ἄγρυπνος καὶ ἄσιτος ὑπὲρ ἁπάντων μερμηρίζω κατὰ φρένα καὶ κατὰ θυμὸν μόνῳ τῷ δεσπότης εἶναι δοκεῖν τετιμημένος.
3. ZEUS: So I should like to ask the philosophers, who say that only the gods are happy, when they suppose we really find leisure for our nectar and our ambrosia in the midst of our countless bothers. Now, here is a case in point: for lack of spare time we are keeping all these stale lawsuits filed away, already spoiled by mildew and spiders’ webs, especially those brought against certain persons by the sciences and the arts—some of these are very antiquated. People are making an outcry on all sides and losing patience and hurling reproaches at Justice.and blaming me for my slowness, not knowing that the hearings have not been postponed, as it happens, on account of our negligence, but on account of the bliss in which they imagine we exist: for that is what they call our press of business.
3. Ζεύς: ὥστε ἡδέως ἂν ἐροίμην τοὺς φιλοσόφους, οἳ μόνους τοὺς θεοὺς εὐδαιμονίζουσιν, πότε καὶ σχολάζειν ἡμᾶς τῷ νέκταρι καὶ τῇ ἀμβροσίᾳ νομίζουσι μυρία ὅσα ἔχοντας πράγματα. Ἰδού γέ τοι ὑπʼ ἀσχολίας τοσαύτας ἑώλους δίκας φυλάττομεν ἀποκειμένας ὑπʼ εὐρῶτος ἤδη καὶ ἀραχνίων διεφθαρμένας, καὶ μάλιστα ὁπόσαι ταῖς ἐπιστήμαις καὶ τέχναις πρὸς ἀνθρώπους τινὰς συνεστᾶσιν, πάνυ παλαιὰς ἐνίας αὐτῶν. οἱ δὲ κεκράγασιν ἁπανταχόθεν καὶ ἀγανακτοῦσιν καὶ τὴν δίκην ἐπιβοῶνται κἀμὲ τῆς βραδυτῆτος αἰτιῶνται, ἀγνοοῦντες ὡς οὐκ ὀλιγωρίᾳ τὰς κρίσεις ὑπερημέρους συνέβη γενέσθαι, ἀλλʼ ὑπὸ τῆς εὐδαιμονίας ᾗ συνεῖναι ἡμᾶς ὑπολαμβάνουσιν. τοῦτο γὰρ τὴν ἀσχολίαν καλοῦσιν.
4. HERMES: I myself hear a great many complaints of that sort on earth, Zeus, but I did not venture to mention them to you. Now, however, I shall do so, as you began the discussion of this topic. They are indeed out of patience and indignant, father, and although they do not venture to talk openly, they put their heads together and grumble, finding fault with the delay. These men should have known long ago how things stood with them and should have acquiesced in the verdict in each case.
4. Ἑρμῆς: καὐτός, ὦ Ζεῦ, πολλὰ τοιαῦτα ἐπὶ τῆς γῆς ἀκούων δυσχεραινόντων λέγειν πρὸς σὲ οὐκ ἐτόλμων. ἐπεὶ δὲ σὺ περὶ τούτων τοὺς λόγους ἐνέβαλες, καὶ δὴ λέγω. πάνυ ἀγανακτοῦσιν, ὦ πάτερ, καὶ σχετλιάζουσιν καὶ εἰς τὸ φανερὸν μὲν οὐ τολμῶσι λέγειν, ὑποτονθορύζουσι δὲ συγκεκυφότες αἰτιώμενοι τὸν χρόνον· οὓς ἔδει πάλαι τὰ καθʼ αὑτοὺς εἰδότας στέργειν ἕκαστον τοῖς δεδικασμένοις.
ZEUS: Well, what do you think, Hermes? Shall we open a session.of court for them, or do you wish we should announce it for next year?
Ζεύς: τί οὖν, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, δοκεῖ; προτίθεμεν αὐτοῖς ἀγορὰν δικῶν, ἢ θέλεις εἰς νέωτα παραγγελοῦμεν;
HERMES: No, indeed; let us open it now.
Ἑρμῆς: οὐ μὲν οὖν, ἀλλὰ ἤδη προθῶμεν.
ZEUS: Do so. Fly down and proclaim that there will be a session of court under the following regulations. All who have entered suit are to come to the Areopagus to-day; at that place Justice is to empanel juries for them out of the entire body of Athenians, the number of jurymen to depend upon the penalty involved; and if anyone thinks that his hearing has been unjust, he is to be allowed to appeal to me and have the case tried afresh, just as if it had not been tried at all. (Zo Justice) Daughter, take your place beside the Dread Goddesses, empanel the juries and have an eye on the trials.
Ζεύς: οὕτω ποίει· σὺ μὲν κήρυττε καταπτάμενος ὅτι ἀγορὰ δικῶν ἔσται κατὰ τάδε. πάντας ὁπόσοι τὰς γραφὰς ἀπενηνόχασιν, ἥκειν τήμερον εἰς Ἄρειον πάγον, ἐκεῖ δὲ τὴν μὲν Δίκην ἀποκληροῦν σφίσι τὰ δικαστήρια κατὰ λόγον τῶν τιμημάτων ἐξ ἁπάντων Ἀθηναίων· εἰ δέ τις ἄδικον οἴοιτο γεγενῆσθαι τὴν κρίσιν, ἐξεῖναι ἐφέντι ἐπʼ ἐμὲ δικάζεσθαι ἐξ ὑπαρχῆς, ὡς εἰ μηδὲ τὸ παράπαν ἐδεδίκαστο. σὺ δέ, ὦ θύγατερ, καθεζομένη παρὰ τὰς σεμνὰς θεὰς ἀποκλήρου τὰς δίκας καὶ ἐπισκόπει τοὺς δικάζοντας.
5. JUSTICE: Back to earth once more, to be driven off by them and to flee from the world again because I cannot stand being laughed at by Injustice?
5. Δίκη: αὖθις εἰς τὴν γῆν, ἵνʼ ἐξελαυνομένη πρὸς αὐτῶν δραπετεύω πάλιν ἐκ τοῦ βίου τὴν Ἀδικίαν ἐπιγελῶσαν οὐ φέρουσα;
ZEUS: You must be of good hope. Certainly by now the philosophers have persuaded them to regard you more highly than Injustice; especially the son of Sophroniscus, who praised just dealing to the skies and declared it the greatest of blessings.
Ζεύς: χρηστὰ ἐλπίζειν σε δεῖ· πάντως γὰρ ἤδη πεπείκασιν αὐτοὺς οἱ φιλόσοφοι σὲ τῆς Ἀδικίας προτιμᾶν, καὶ μάλιστα ὁ τοῦ Σωφρονίσκου τὸ δίκαιον ὑπερεπαινέσας καὶ ἀγαθῶν τὸ μέγιστον ἀποφήνας.
JUSTICE: Truly the very man you mention profited greatly by his talk about me! He was handed over to the Eleven, thrown into prison, and drank hemlock, poor fellow, before he had even paid that cock to Asclepius; so much the better of the argument had his accusers, whose philosophy was directly opposed to his, and favoured Injustice.
Δίκη: Πάνυ γοῦν ὃν φὴς αὐτὸν ἐκεῖνον ὤνησαν οἱ περὶ ἐμοῦ λόγοι, ὃς παραδοθεὶς τοῖς ἕνδεκα καὶ εἰς τὸ δεσμωτήριον ἐμπεσὼν ἔπιεν ἄθλιος τοῦ κωνείου, μηδὲ τὸν ἀλεκτρυόνα τῷ Ἀσκληπιῷ ἀποδεδωκώς· παρὰ τοσοῦτον ὑπερέσχον οἱ κατήγοροι τἀναντία περὶ τῆς Ἀδικίας φιλοσοφοῦντες.
6. ZEUS: The people were still unfamiliar with the teachings of philosophy at that time, and there were few that pursued it, so it was natural that the juries inclined towards Anytus and Meletus. But at present, do not you see how many short cloaks and staves and wallets there are? On all sides there are long beards, and books in the left hand, and everybody preaches in favour of you; the public walks are full of people assembling in companies and in battalions, and there is nobody who does not want to be thought a scion of Virtue. In fact, many, giving up the trades that they had before, rush after the wallet and the cloak, tan their bodies in the sun to Ethiopian hue, make themselves extemporaneous philosophers out of cobblers or carpenters, and go about praising you and your virtue. Consequently, in the words of the proverb, it would be easier for a man to fall in a boat without hitting a plank than for your eye to miss a philosopher wherever it looks.
6. Ζεύς: ξένα ἔτι τοῖς πολλοῖς τὰ τῆς φιλοσοφίας ἦν τότε, καὶ ὀλίγοι ἦσαν οἱ φιλοσοφοῦντες, ὥστε εἰκότως εἰς τὸν Ἄνυτον καὶ Μέλητον ἔρρεπεν τὰ δικαστήρια. τὸ δὲ νῦν εἶναι, οὐχ ὁρᾷς ὅσοι τρίβωνες καὶ βακτηρίαι καὶ πῆραι; καὶ ἁπανταχοῦ πώγων βαθὺς καὶ βιβλίον ἐν τῇ ἀριστερᾷ, καὶ πάντες ὑπὲρ σοῦ φιλοσοφοῦσι, μεστοὶ δὲ οἱ περίπατοι κατὰ ἴλας καὶ φάλαγγας ἀλλήλοις ἀπαντώντων, καὶ οὐδεὶς ὅστις οὐ τρόφιμος τῆς ἀρετῆς εἶναι δοκεῖν βούλεται. πολλοὶ γοῦν τὰς τέχνας ἀφέντες ἃς εἶχον τέως, ἐπὶ τὴν πήραν ᾄξαντες καὶ τὸ τριβώνιον, καὶ τὸ σῶμα πρὸς τὸν ἥλιον εἰς τὸ Αἰθιοπικὸν ἐπιχράναντες αὐτοσχέδιοι φιλόσοφοι ἐκ σκυτοτόμων ἢ τεκτόνων περινοστοῦσι σὲ καὶ τὴν σὴν ἀρετὴν ἐπαινοῦντες. ὥστε κατὰ τὴν παροιμίαν, θᾶττον ἄν τις ἐν πλοίῳ πεσὼν διαμάρτοι ξύλου ἢ ἔνθα ἂν ἀπίδῃ ὁ ὀφθαλμός, ἀπορήσει φιλοσόφου.
7. JUSTICE: Yes, but those very men frighten me, Zeus, by quarrelling with each other and showing unfairness even in their discussions of me. It is rumoured, too, that while most of them claim kinship with me in words, when it comes to facts they do not even open their house to me at all, but make it plain that they will lock me out if ever I come to their door; for they made Injustice their bosom friend long ago.
7. Δίκη: καὶ μὴν οὗτοί με, ὦ Ζεῦ, δεδίττονται πρὸς ἀλλήλους ἐρίζοντες καὶ ἀγνωμονοῦντες ἐν αὐτοῖς οἷς περὶ ἐμοῦ διεξέρχονται. φασὶ δὲ καὶ τοὺς πλείστους αὐτῶν ἐν μὲν τοῖς λόγοις προσποιεῖσθαί με, ἐπὶ δὲ τῶν πραγμάτων μηδὲ τὸ παράπαν εἰς τὴν οἰκίαν παραδέχεσθαι, ἀλλὰ δήλους εἶναι ἀποκλείσοντας ἢν ἀφίκωμαί ποτε αὐτοῖς ἐπὶ τὰς θύρας· πάλαι γὰρ τὴν Ἀδικίαν προεπεξενῶσθαι αὐτοῖς.
ZEUS: They are not all bad, my daughter, and it is enough if you find some that are good. But go now, so that a few cases, at least, may be heard to-day.
Ζεύς: οὐ πάντες, ὦ θύγατερ, μοχθηροί εἰσιν· ἱκανὸν δὲ κἂν ἐνίοις τισὶν χρηστοῖς ἐντύχῃς. ἀλλʼ ἄπιτε ἤδη, ὡς κἂν ὀλίγαι τήμερον ἐκδικασθῶσιν.
8. HERMES: Let us set out in this direction, Justice, straight for Sunium, not far from the foot of Hymettus, to the left of Parnes, where you see those two heights; you have probably forgotten the way long since. But why are you crying and taking it hard? Don't be afraid: things are no longer the same in life. All those Scirons and Pinebenders and Busirises and Phalarises whom you used to fear in former days are dead, and now Wisdom and the Academy and the Porch are in full sway, seek for you everywhere, and hold conversations about you, in open-mouthed expectation that, from some quarter or other, you may perhaps come flying down to them once more.
8. Ἑρμῆς: προΐωμεν, ὦ Δίκη, ταύτῃ εὐθὺ τοῦ Σουνίου μικρὸν ὑπὸ τὸν Ὑμηττὸν ἐπὶ τὰ λαιὰ τῆς Πάρνηθος, ἔνθα αἱ δύο ἐκεῖναι ἄκραι· σὺ γὰρ ἔοικας ἐκλελῆσθαι πάλαι τὴν ὁδόν. ἀλλὰ τί δακρύεις καὶ σχετλιάζεις; μὴ δέδιθι· οὐδέθ’ ὅμοια τὰ ἐν τῷ βίῳ· τεθνᾶσιν ἐκεῖνοι πάντες οἱ Σκείρωνες καὶ Πιτυοκάμπται καὶ Βουσίριδες καὶ Φαλάριδες οὓς ἐδεδίεις τότε, νυνὶ δὲ Σοφία καὶ Ἀκαδήμεια καὶ Στοὰ κατέχουσι πάντα καὶ πανταχοῦ σε ζητοῦσιν καὶ περὶ σοῦ διαλέγονται, κεχηνότες εἴ ποθεν εἰς αὐτοὺς καταπτοῖο πάλιν.
JUSTICE: Well, Hermes, you are the only person who can tell me the truth, inasmuch as you associate with them a great deal, passing your days with them in the athletic clubs and in the market-place; for you are the god of the market, as well as being crier in the meetings of the assembly. What sort’of people are they, and is it possible for me to abide among them?
Δίκη: σὺ γοῦν μοι τἀληθές, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, ἂν εἴποις μόνος, ἅτε συνὼν αὐτοῖς τὰ πολλὰ καὶ συνδιατρίβων ἔν τε γυμνασίοις καὶ ἐν τῇ ἀγορᾷ — καὶ ἀγοραῖος γὰρ εἶ καὶ ἐν ταῖς ἐκκλησίαις κηρύττεις — ὁποῖοι γεγένηνται καὶ εἰ δυνατή μοι παρʼ αὐτοῖς ἡ μονή.
HERMES: To be sure; I should not be treating you fairly if I did not tell you, since you are my sister. Most of them have been helped not a little by philosophy: for if it goes no further, at least regard for their cloth makes them more circumspect in sinning. However, you will come upon a few rascals among them—I must tell the truth, I suppose—and some who are partly wise and partly foolish. You see, when Wisdom took them in hand and dyed them over, all those who thoroughly absorbed the dye were made entirely serviceable, without any intermixture of other hues, and they are quite ready to receive you; while those who because of their ingrained filth were not deeply penetrated by the colouring matter of the dyestuff are better than the rest, to be sure, but unfinished products, half-white, blemished, and spotted like the pard. And there are some who have only touched the kettle on the outside with a finger-tip and smeared on some of the soot, yet think that they too are well enough dyed over. You, however, will of course pass your time with the best of them.
Ἑρμῆς: νὴ Δία, ἀδικοίην γὰρ ἂν πρὸς ἀδελφήν σε οὖσαν μὴ λέγων. οὐκ ὀλίγα πρὸς τῆς φιλοσοφίας ὠφέληνται οἱ πολλοὶ αὐτῶν· καὶ γὰρ εἰ μηδὲν ἄλλο, αἰδοῖ γοῦν τοῦ σχήματος μετριώτερα διαμαρτάνουσιν. πλὴν ἀλλὰ καὶ μοχθηροῖς τισιν ἐντεύξῃ αὐτῶν — χρὴ γάρ, οἶμαι, τἀληθῆ λέγειν — ἐνίοις δὲ ἡμισόφοις καὶ ἡμιφαύλοις. ἐπεὶ γὰρ αὐτοὺς μετέβαπτεν ἡ σοφία παραλαβοῦσα, ὁπόσοι μὲν εἰς κόρον ἔπιον τῆς βαφῆς, χρηστοὶ ἀκριβῶς ἀπετελέσθησαν ἀμιγεῖς ἑτέρων χρωμάτων, καὶ πρός γε τὴν σὴν ὑποδοχὴν οὗτοι ἑτοιμότατοι· ὅσοι δὲ ὑπὸ τοῦ πάλαι ῥύπου μὴ εἰς βάθος παρεδέξαντο ὁπόσον δευσοποιὸν τοῦ φαρμάκου, τῶν ἄλλων ἀμείνους, ἀτελεῖς δὲ ὅμως καὶ μιξόλευκοι καὶ κατεστιγμένοι καὶ παρδαλωτοὶ τὴν χρόαν. εἰσὶ δʼ οἳ καὶ μόνον ψαύσαντες ἔκτοσθεν τοῦ λέβητος ἄκρῳ τῷ δακτύλῳ καὶ ἐπιχρισάμενοι τῆς ἀσβόλου ἱκανῶς οἴονται καὶ οὗτοι μεταβεβάφθαι. σοὶ μέντοι δῆλον ὅτι μετὰ τῶν ἀρίστων ἡ διατριβὴ ἔσται.
9. HERMES: But in the course of our talk we are already drawing near to Attica, so let us leave Sunium on our right, and now let us glide down to the Acropolis. Now that we have alighted, you sit down here on the Areopagus somewhere, facing the Pnyx, and wait until I give out the proclamation from Zeus. If I climb the Acropolis it will be easier for me to summon everybody from that point of vantage for the voice.
9. Ἑρμῆς: ἀλλὰ μεταξὺ λόγων ἤδη πλησιάζομεν τῇ Ἀττικῇ· ὥστε τὸ μὲν Σούνιον ἐν δεξιᾷ καταλείπωμεν, εἰς δὲ τὴν ἀκρόπολιν ἀπονεύωμεν ἤδη. καὶ ἐπείπερ καταβεβήκαμεν, αὐτὴ μὲν ἐνταῦθά που ἐπὶ τοῦ πάγου κάθησο εἰς τὴν πνύκα ὁρῶσα καὶ περιμένουσα ἔστʼ ἂν κηρύξω τὰ παρὰ τοῦ Διός, ἐγὼ δὲ εἰς τὴν ἀκρόπολιν ἀναβὰς ῥᾷον οὕτως ἅπαντας ἐκ τοῦ ἐπηκόου προσκαλέσομαι.
JUSTICE: Don’t go, Hermes, until you have told me who comes here, the person with the horns and the shepherd’s pipe and the hairy legs.
Δίκη: μὴ πρότερον ἀπέλθῃς, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, πρὶν εἰπεῖν ὅστις οὗτος ὁ προσιών ἐστιν, ὁ κερασφόρος, ὁ τὴν σύριγγα, ὁ λάσιος ἐκ τοῖς σκελοῖν.
HERMES: What! Don’t you know Pan, the most bacchanalian of the servants of Dionysus? He formerly lived on Parthenion, but at the time of the approach of Datis by sea and the landing of the barbarians at Marathon, he came unasked to fight on the side of the Athenians; and since then, accepting this cavern under the Acropolis, a little above the Pelasgicon, he lives in it, paying the usual tax as a resident alien. Very likely he has seen us near and is coming up to greet us.
Ἑρμῆς: τί φής; ἀγνοεῖς τὸν Πᾶνα, τῶν Διονύσου θεραπόντων τὸν βακχικώτατον; οὗτος ᾤκει μὲν τὸ πρόσθεν ἀνὰ τὸ Παρθένιον, ὑπὸ δὲ τὸν Δάτιδος ἐπίπλουν καὶ τὴν Μαραθῶνάδε τῶν βαρβάρων ἀπόβασιν ἧκεν ἄκλητος τοῖς Ἀθηναίοις σύμμαχος, καὶ τὸ ἀπʼ ἐκείνου τὴν ὑπὸ τῇ ἀκροπόλει σπήλυγγα ταύτην ἀπολαβόμενος οἰκεῖ μικρὸν ὑπὲρ τοῦ Πελασγικοῦ εἰς τὸ μετοίκιον συντελῶν. καὶ νῦν ὡς τὸ εἰκὸς ἰδὼν ἡμᾶς ἐκ γειτόνων πρόσεισι δεξιωσόμενος.
10. PAN: Good day to you, Hermes and Justice.HERMES: The same to you, Pan, most musical and most frolicsome of all satyrs, and at Athens the most bellicose!PAN: What business brought you two here, Hermes?
10. Πάν: χαίρετε, ὦ Ἑρμῆ καὶ Δίκη.Ἑρμῆς: καὶ σύ γε, ὦ Πάν, μουσικώτατε καὶ πηδητικώτατε Σατύρων ἁπάντων, Ἀθήνησι δὲ καὶ πολεμικώτατε. Πάν: τίς δὲ ὑμᾶς, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, χρεία δεῦρο ἤγαγεν;
HERMES: She will tell you the whole story; I am going to the Acropolis, to make my proclamation.
Ἑρμῆς: αὕτη σοι διηγήσεται τὰ πάντα· ἐγὼ δὲ ἐπὶ τὴν ἀκρόπολιν ἄπειμι καὶ τὸ κήρυγμα.
JUSTICE: Zeus sent me down, Pan, to empanel juries for the lawsuits. But how do you find things in Athens?PAN: On the whole, I do not get on as well as I ought here—much worse than I expected; and yet I dis- pelled the mighty hue and cry of the barbarians. In spite of that, they come up only two or three times a year, pick out and sacrifice in my honour a he-goat with a powerful goatish smell, and then feast on the meat, making me a mere witness of their good cheer and paying their respects to me only with their noise. However, their laughter and fun afford me some amusement.
Δίκη: ὁ Ζεύς, ὦ Πάν, κατέπεμψέ με ἀποκληρώσουσαν τὰς δίκας. σοὶ δὲ πῶς τὰ ἐν Ἀθήναις ἔχει; Πάν: τὸ μὲν ὅλον οὐ κατʼ ἀξίαν πράττω παρʼ αὐτοῖς, ἀλλὰ πολὺ καταδεέστερον τῆς ἐλπίδος, καὶ ταῦτα τηλικοῦτον ἀπωσάμενος κυδοιμὸν τὸν ἐκ τῶν βαρβάρων. ὅμως δὲ δὶς ἢ τρὶς τοῦ ἔτους ἀνιόντες ἐπιλεξάμενοι τράγον ἔνορχην θύουσί μοι πολλῆς τῆς κινάβρας ἀπόζοντα, εἶτʼ εὐωχοῦνται τὰ κρέα, ποιησάμενοί με τῆς εὐφροσύνης μάρτυρα καὶ ψιλῷ τιμήσαντες τῷ κρότῳ. πλὴν ἀλλʼ ἔχει τινά μοι ψυχαγωγίαν ὁ γέλως αὐτῶν καὶ ἡ παιδιά.
11. JUSTICE: In general, Pan, have they been improved in virtue by the philosophers?PAN: What do you mean by philosophers? Those gloomy fellows, flocking together, with beards like mine, who talk so much?
11. Δίκη: τὰ δʼ ἄλλα, ὦ Πάν, ἀμείνους πρὸς ἀρετὴν ἐγένοντο ὑπὸ τῶν φιλοσόφων; Πάν: τίνας λέγεις τοὺς φιλοσόφους; ἆρʼ ἐκείνους τοὺς κατηφεῖς, τοὺς συνάμα πολλούς, τοὺς τὸ γένειον ὁμοίους ἐμοί, τοὺς λάλους;
JUSTICE: To be sure.PAN: I do not know at all what they mean and_I do not understand their wisdom, for I am a mountaineer and I have not studied those clever, citified, technical terms, Justice. How could a literary man or a philosopher possibly come from Arcadia? My wisdom does not go beyond the flute and the pipes; for the rest I am a goatherd, a dancer, and if need bea fighter. However, I hear them bawling continually and talking about “virtue” (whatever that means) and “ideas” and “nature” and “things incorporeal,” terms that are to me unknown and outlandish. They begin their discussions peaceably, but as the conference proceeds they raise their voices to a high falsetto, so that, what with their excessive straining and their endeavour to talk at the same time, their faces get red, their necks get swollen, and their veins stand out like those of flute-players when they try to blow into a closed flute. In fact, they spoil their arguments, confuse the original subject of inquiry, and then, after abusing one another, most of them, they go away wiping the sweat off their foreheads with their bent fingers; and the man that is most loud-mouthed and impudent and leaves last when they break up is considered to have the best of it. However, the common people admire them, especially those who have nothing more pressing to do, and stand there enchanted by their impudence and their shouting. For my part, I considered them impostors in consequence of all this, and was annoyed at the resemblance in beard. But perhaps there was something beneficial to the common weal in their shouting and some good sprang from those technical terms of theirs—I can’t say. However, if I am to tell the truth without any reserve—for I dwell on a look-out, as you see—I have often seen many of them in the dark of the evening— JUSTICE: Hush, Pan; didn’t it seem to you that Hermes is making a proclamation?
Δίκη: καὶ μάλα. Πάν: οὐκ οἶδα ὅλως ὅ τι καὶ λέγουσιν οὐδὲ συνίημι τὴν σοφίαν αὐτῶν· ὄρειος γὰρ ἔγωγε καὶ τὰ κομψὰ ταῦτα ῥημάτια καὶ ἀστικὰ οὐ μεμάθηκα, ὦ Δίκη. πόθεν γὰρ ἐν Ἀρκαδίᾳ σοφιστὴς ἢ φιλόσοφος; μέχρι τοῦ πλαγίου καλάμου καὶ τῆς σύριγγος ἐγὼ σοφός, τὰ δʼ ἄλλα αἰπόλος καὶ χορευτὴς καὶ πολεμιστής, ἢν δέῃ. πλὴν ἀλλʼ ἀκούω γε αὐτῶν ἀεὶ κεκραγότων καὶ ἀρετήν τινα καὶ ἰδέας καὶ φύσιν καὶ ἀσώματα διεξιόντων, ἄγνωστα ἐμοὶ καὶ ξένα ὀνόματα. καὶ τὰ πρῶτα μὲν εἰρηνικῶς ἐνάρχονται τῶν πρὸς ἀλλήλους λόγων, προιούσης δὲ τῆς συνουσίας ἐπιτείνουσι τὸ φθέγμα μέχρι πρὸς τὸ ὄρθιον, ὥστε ὑπερδιατεινομένων καὶ ἅμα λέγειν ἐθελόντων τό τε πρόσωπον ἐρυθριᾷ καὶ ὁ τράχηλος οἰδεῖ καὶ αἱ φλέβες ἐξανίστανται ὥσπερ τῶν αὐλητῶν ὁπόταν εἰς στενὸν τὸν αὐλὸν ἐμπνεῖν βιάζωνται. διαταράξαντες γοῦν τοὺς λόγους καὶ τὸ ἐξ ἀρχῆς ἐπισκοπούμενον συγχέαντες ἀπίασι λοιδορησάμενοι ἀλλήλοις οἱ πολλοί, τὸν ἱδρῶτα ἐκ τοῦ μετώπου ἀγκύλῳ τῷ δακτύλῳ ἀποξυόμενοι, καὶ οὗτος κρατεῖν ἔδοξεν ὃς ἂν μεγαλοφωνότερος αὐτῶν ᾖ καὶ θρασύτερος καὶ διαλυομένων ἀπέλθῃ ὕστερος. πλὴν ἀλλʼ ὅ γε λεὼς ὁ πολὺς τεθήπασιν αὐτούς, καὶ μάλιστα ὁπόσους μηδὲν τῶν ἀναγκαιοτέρων ἀσχολεῖ, καὶ παρεστᾶσι πρὸς τὸ θράσος καὶ τὴν βοὴν κεκηλημένοι. ἐμοὶ μὲν οὖν ἀλαζόνες τινὲς ἐδόκουν ἀπὸ τούτων καὶ ἠνιώμην ἐπὶ τῇ τοῦ πώγωνος ὁμοιότητι. εἰ δέ γε δημωφελές τι ἐνῆν τῇ βοῇ αὐτῶν καί τι ἀγαθὸν ἐκ τῶν ῥημάτων ἐκείνων ἀνεφύετο αὐτοῖς, οὐκ ἂν εἰπεῖν ἔχοιμι. πλὴν ἀλλʼ εἴ γε δεῖ μηδὲν ὑποστειλάμενον τἀληθὲς διηγήσασθαι — οἰκῶ γὰρ ἐπὶ σκοπῆς, ὡς ὁρᾷς — πολλοὺς αὐτῶν πολλάκις ἤδη ἐθεασάμην περὶ δείλην ὀψίαν — Δίκη: ἐπίσχες, ὦ Πάν.
12. PAN: Why, yes. HERMES: Oyez, oyez! Under the blessing of Heaven, we shall hold a session of court to-day, the seventh of Elaphebolion. All who have entered suits are to come to the Areopagus, where Justice will empanel the juries and be present in person at the trials. The jurors will be drawn from the entire body of Athenians; the pay will be three obols a case, and the number of jurors will be in accordance with the charge. All those who have entered suits but have died before they came to trial are to be sent back to earth by Aeacus. If anyone thinks he has had an unjust hearing, he is to appeal the case, and the appeal will be to Zeus. PAN: Heavens, what a hubbub! What a shout they raised, Justice, and how eagerly they are gathering at a run, dragging each other up the hill, straight for the Areopagus! Hermes, too, is here already, so busy yourselves with the cases, empanel your juries and give your verdicts as usual; I am going back to the cave to pipe one of the passionate melodies with © which I am in the habit of provoking Echo. I am sick of trials and speeches, for I hear the pleaders on the Areopagus every day.
12. οὐχ ὁ Ἑρμῆς σοι κηρύττειν ἔδοξεν; Πάν: πάνυ μὲν οὖν. Ἑρμῆς: ἀκούετε λεῴ, ἀγορὰν δικῶν ἀγαθῇ τύχῃ καταστησόμεθα τήμερον Ἐλαφηβολιῶνος ἑβδόμῃ ἱσταμένου. ὁπόσοι γραφὰς ἀπήνεγκαν, ἥκειν εἰς Ἄρειον πάγον, ἔνθα ἡ Δίκη ἀποκληρώσει τὰ δικαστήρια καὶ αὐτὴν παρέσται τοῖς δικάζουσιν· οἱ δικασταὶ ἐξ ἁπάντων Ἀθηναίων· ὁ μισθὸς τριώβολον ἑκάστης δίκης· ἀριθμὸς τῶν δικαστῶν κατὰ λόγον τοῦ ἐγκλήματος. ὁπόσοι δὲ ἀποθέμενοι γραφὴν πρὶν εἰσελθεῖν ἀπέθανον, καὶ τούτους ὁ Αἰακὸς ἀναπεμψάτω. ἢν δέ τις ἄδικα δεδικάσθαι οἴηται, ἐφέσιμον ἀγωνιεῖται τὴν δίκην· ἡ δὲ ἔφεσις ἐπὶ τὸν Δία. Πάν: βαβαὶ τοῦ θορύβου· ἡλίκον, ὦ Δίκη, ἀνεβόησαν, ὡς δὲ καὶ σπουδῇ συνθέουσιν ἕλκοντες ἀλλήλους πρὸς τὸ ἄναντες εὐθὺ τοῦ Ἀρείου πάγου. καὶ ὁ Ἑρμῆς δὲ ἤδη πάρεστιν. ὥστε ὑμεῖς μὲν ἀμφὶ τὰς δίκας ἔχετε καὶ ἀποκληροῦτε καὶ διακρίνατε ὥσπερ ὑμῖν νόμος, ἐγὼ δὲ ἐπὶ τὸ σπήλαιον ἀπελθὼν συρίξομαί τι μέλος τῶν ἐρωτικῶν ᾧ τὴν Ἠχὼ εἴωθα ἐπικερτομεῖν· ἀκροάσεων δὲ καὶ λόγων τῶν δικανικῶν ἅλις ἔχει μοι ὁσημέραι τῶν ἐν Ἀρείῳ πάγῳ δικαζομένων ἀκούοντι.
13. HERMES: Come, Justice, let’s call them to the bar.
13. Ἑρμῆς: ἄγε, ὦ Δίκη, προσκαλῶμεν.
JUSTICE: Quite right. Indeed they are approaching incrowds, as you see, with a great noise, buzzing about the hilltop like wasps. ATHENIAN: I’ve got you, curse you! SECOND ATHENIAN: You are a blackmailer! THIRD ATHENIAN: At last you are going to pay the penalty! FOURTH ATHENIAN: I will prove that you have committed horrible crimes! FIFTH ATHENIAN: Empanel my jury first! SIXTH ATHENIAN: Come to court with me, scoundrel! SEVENTH ATHENIAN: Stop choking me!
Δίκη: εὖ λέγεις. ἀθρόοι γοῦν, ὡς ὁρᾷς, προσίασι θορυβοῦντες, ὥσπερ οἱ σφῆκες περιβομβοῦντες τὴν ἄκραν. Ἀθηναῖος: εἴληφά σε, ὦ κατάρατε. Ἄλλος1: συκοφαντεῖς. Ἄλλος2: δώσεις ποτὲ ἤδη τὴν δίκην. Ἄλλος3: ἐξελέγξω σε δεινὰ εἰργασμένον. Ἄλλος4: ἐμοὶ πρώτῳ ἀποκλήρωσον. Ἄλλος5: ἕπου, μιαρέ, πρὸς τὸ δικαστήριον. Ἄλλος6: μὴ ἄγχε με.
JUSTICE: Do you know what we ought to do, Hermes? Let us put off the rest of. the cases until to-morrow, and to-day let us provide only for those entered by professions or pursuits or sciences against men. Pass me up the writs of that description.
Δίκη: οἶσθα ὃ δράσωμεν, ὦ Ἑρμῆ; τὰς μὲν ἄλλας δίκας εἰς τὴν αὔριον ὑπερβαλώμεθα, τήμερον δὲ κληρῶμεν τὰς τοιαύτας ὁπόσαι τέχναις ἢ βίοις ἢ ἐπιστήμαις πρὸς ἄνδρας εἰσὶν ἐπηγγελμέναι. καί μοι ταύτας ἀνάδος τῶν γραφῶν.
HERMES: Intemperance v. the Academy in re Polemo: kidnapping.
Ἑρμῆς: μέθη κατὰ τῆς Ἀκαδημείας περὶ Πολέμωνος ἀνδραποδισμοῦ.
JUSTICE: Draw seven jurors.
Δίκη: ἑπτὰ κλήρωσον.
HERMES: Stoa v. Pleasure: alienation of affections— because Pleasure coaxed away her lover, Dionysius.
Ἑρμῆς: ἡ Στοὰ κατὰ τῆς Ἡδονῆς ἀδικίας, ὅτι τὸν ἐραστὴν αὐτῆς Διονύσιον ἀπεβουκόλησεν.
JUSTICE: Five will do.
Δίκη: πέντε ἱκανοί.
HERMES: High-living v. Virtue, re Aristippus.
Ἑρμῆς: περὶ Ἀριστίππου Τρυφὴ πρὸς Ἀρετήν.
JUSTICE: Let five sit in this case too.
Δίκη: πέντε καὶ τούτοις δικασάτωσαν.
HERMES: Banking v. Diogenes: absconding.
Ἑρμῆς: Ἀργυραμοιβικὴ δρασμοῦ Διογένει.
JUSTICE: Draw only three.
Δίκη: τρεῖς ἀποκλήρου μόνους.
HERMES: Painting v. Pyrrho: breach of contract.
Ἑρμῆς: γραφικὴ κατὰ Πύρρωνος λιποταξίου.
JUSTICE: Let nine sit on jury.
Δίκη: ἐννέα κρινάτωσαν.
14. HERMES: Do you want us to provide juries for these two cases also, recorded yesterday against the public speaker?
14. Ἑρμῆς: βούλει καὶ ταύτας ἀποκληρῶμεν, ὦ Δίκη, τὰς δύο, τὰς πρῴην ἀπενηνεγμένας κατὰ τοῦ ῥήτορος;
JUSTICE: Let us first finish up the cases of long-standing; these can go over until to-morrow for trial.
Δίκη: τὰς παλαιὰς πρότερον διανύσωμεν· αὗται δὲ εἰς ὕστερον δεδικάσονται.
HERMES: Why, these are of the same nature, and the complaint, although recent, is very like those for which we have already provided juries, so that it ought to be tried along with them.
Ἑρμῆς: καὶ μὴν ὅμοιαί γε καὶ αὗται καὶ τὸ ἔγκλημα, εἰ καὶ νεαρόν, ἀλλὰ παραπλήσιον τοῖς προαποκεκληρωμένοις· ὥστε ἐν τούτοις δικασθῆναι ἄξιον.
JUSTICE: You appear to have been unduly influenced to make the request, Hermes. Let us make the drawing, however, since you wish; but only for these two cases; we have enough on the docket. Give me the writs.
Δίκη: ἔοικας, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, χαριζομένῳ τὴν δέησιν. ἀποκληρῶμεν δʼ ὅμως, εἰ δοκεῖ, πλὴν ἀλλὰ ταύτας μόνας· ἱκαναὶ γὰρ αἱ ἀποκεκληρωμέναι. δὸς τὰς γραφάς.
HERMES: Oratory v. the Syrian: neglect. Dialogue v. the same: maltreatment.
Ἑρμῆς: ῥητορικὴ κακώσεως τῷ Σύρῳ· διάλογος τῷ αὐτῷ ὕβρεως.
JUSTICE: Who is this man? His name is not recorded.
Δίκη: τίς δὲ οὗτός ἐστιν; οὐ γὰρ ἐγγέγραπται τοὔνομα.
HERMES: Empanel a jury for him as it stands in the writ— for the public speaker, the Syrian. There is nothing to hinder its being done anonymously.
Ἑρμῆς: οὕτως ἀποκλήρου, τῷ ῥήτορι τῷ Σύρῳ· κωλύσει γὰρ οὐδὲν καὶ ἄνευ τοῦ ὀνόματος.
JUSTICE: Look here, are we really to try cases from over the border here in Athens, on the Areopagus? They ought to have been tried on the other side of the Euphrates. However, draw eleven jurors, the same to sit for both cases.
Δίκη: ἰδοῦ, καὶ τὰς ὑπερορίους ἤδη Ἀθήνησιν ἐν Ἀρείῳ πάγῳ ἀποκληρώσομεν, ἃς ὑπὲρ τὸν Εὐφράτην καλῶς εἶχε δεδικάσθαι; πλὴν ἀλλὰ κλήρου ἕνδεκα τοὺς αὐτοὺς ἑκατέρᾳ τῶν δικῶν.
HERMES: You are right, Justice, to avoid spending too much in jury-fees.
Ἑρμῆς: εὖ γε, ὦ Δίκη, φείδῃ μὴ πολὺ ἀναλίσκεσθαι τὸ δικαστικόν.
15. JUSTICE: Let the first jury sit, in the“case of the Academy v. Intemperance. Fill the water-clock. Plead first, Intemperance... Why does she hold her tongue and shake her head? Go to her and find out, Hermes.
15. Δίκη: οἱ πρῶτοι καθιζέτωσαν τῇ Ἀκαδημείᾳ καὶ τῇ Μέθῃ· σὺ δὲ τὸ ὕδωρ ἔγχει. προτέρα δὲ σὺ λέγε ἡ Μέθη. τί σιγᾷ καὶ διανεύει; μάθε, ὦ Ἑρμῆ, προσελθών.
HERMES: She says that she cannot plead her case because her tongue is tied with drink and she is afraid of getting laughed at in court. She can hardly stand, as you see.
Ἑρμῆς: οὐ δύναμαι, φησί, τὸν ἀγῶνα εἰπεῖν ὑπὸ τοῦ ἀκράτου τὴν γλῶτταν πεπεδημένη, μὴ γέλωτα ὄφλω ἐν τῷ δικαστηρίῳ. μόλις δὲ καὶ ἕστηκεν, ὡς ὁρᾷς.
JUSTICE: Then let her have an advocate appear, one of these public pleaders. There are plenty of them ready to split their lungs for three obols!
Δίκη: οὐκοῦν συνήγορον ἀναβιβασάσθω τῶν κοινῶν τούτων τινά· πολλοὶ γὰρ οἱ κἂν ἐπὶ τριωβόλῳ διαρραγῆναι ἕτοιμοι.
HERMES: But not one will care to espouse the cause of Intemperance, not openly, at any rate. However, this request of hers seems reasonable.
Ἑρμῆς: ἀλλʼ οὐδὲ εἷς ἐθελήσει ἔν γε τῷ φανερῷ συναγορεῦσαι Μέθῃ. πλὴν εὐγνώμονά γε ταῦτα ἔοικεν ἀξιοῦν.
JUSTICE: What request?
Δίκη: τὰ ποῖα;
HERMES: “The Academy,” she says, “is always ready to argue on both sides and trains herself to be able to speak eloquently both pro and con. Therefore let her plead first for me, and then after that she will plead for herself.”
Ἑρμῆς: ἡ Ἀκαδήμεια πρὸς ἀμφοτέρους ἀεὶ παρεσκεύασται τοὺς λόγους καὶ τοῦτʼ ἀσκεῖ τἀναντία καλῶς δύνασθαι λέγειν. αὕτη τοίνυν, φησίν, ὑπὲρ ἐμοῦ πρότερον εἰπάτω, εἶτα ὕστερον ὑπὲρ ἑαυτῆς ἐρεῖ.
JUSTICE: That is unprecedented. Nevertheless, make both speeches, Academy, since it is easy for you.
Δίκη: καινὰ μὲν ταῦτα, εἰπὲ δὲ ὅμως, ὦ Ἀκαδήμεια, τὸν λόγον ἑκάτερον, ἐπεί σοι ῥᾴδιον.
16. ACADEMY: Listen first, gentlemen of the jury, to the plea of Intemperance, as the water now runs for her. The poor creature has been treated with the greatest injustice by me, the Academy. She has been robbed of the only friendly and faithful slave she had, who thought none of her orders unbecoming, Polemo yonder, who used to go roistering through the middle of the square in broad day, who kept a music-girl’and had himself sung to from morning to night, who was always drunk and debauched and had garlands of flowers on his head. That this: is true, all the Athenians will testify; for they never saw Polemosober. But when the unhappy man went rollicking to the Academy's door, as he used to go to everybody's, she claimed him as her slave, snatched him out of the hands of Intemperance by main strength, and took him into her house. Then she forced him to drink water, taught him to keep sober, stripped off his garlands: and when he ought to have been drinking at table, she made him study intricate, gloomy terms, full of profound thought. So, instead of the flush that formerly glowed upon him, the poor man has grown pale, and his body is shrivelled; he has forgotten all his songs, and he sometimes sits without food or drink till the middle of the evening, talking the kind of balderdash that I, the Academy, teach people to talk unendingly. What is more, he even abuses Intemperance at my instigation and says any number of unpleasant things about her. I have said about all that there is to say for Intemperance. Now I will speak for myself, and from this point let the water run for me.
16. Ἀκαδημεια: ἀκούετε, ὦ ἄνδρες δικασταί, πρότερα τὰ ὑπὲρ τῆς Μέθης· ἐκείνης γὰρ τό γε νῦν ῥέον. ἠδίκηται ἡ ἀθλία τὰ μέγιστα ὑπὸ τῆς Ἀκαδημείας ἐμοῦ, ἀνδράποδον ὃ μόνον εἶχεν εὔνουν καὶ πιστὸν αὐτῇ, μηδὲν αἰσχρὸν ὧν προστάξειεν οἰόμενον, ἀφαιρεθεῖσα τὸν Πολέμωνα ἐκεῖνον, ὃς μεθʼ ἡμέραν ἐκώμαζεν διὰ τῆς ἀγορᾶς μέσης, ψαλτρίαν ἔχων καὶ κατᾳδόμενος ἕωθεν εἰς ἑσπέραν, μεθύων ἀεὶ καὶ κραιπαλῶν καὶ τὴν κεφαλὴν τοῖς στεφάνοις διηνθισμένος. καὶ ταῦτα ὅτι ἀληθῆ, μάρτυρες Ἀθηναῖοι ἅπαντες, οἳ μηδὲ πώποτε νήφοντα Πολέμωνα εἶδον. ἐπεὶ δὲ ὁ κακοδαίμων ἐπὶ τὰς τῆς Ἀκαδημείας θύρας ἐκώμασεν, ὥσπερ ἐπὶ πάντας εἰώθει, ἀνδραποδισαμένη αὐτὸν καὶ ἀπὸ τῶν χειρῶν τῆς Μέθης ἁρπάσασα μετὰ βίας καὶ πρὸς αὑτὴν ἀγαγοῦσα ὑδροποτεῖν τε κατηνάγκασεν καὶ νήφειν μετεδίδαξεν καὶ τοὺς στεφάνους περιέσπασεν καὶ δέον πίνειν κατακείμενον, ῥημάτια σκολιὰ καὶ δύστηνα καὶ πολλῆς φροντίδος ἀνάμεστα ἐπαίδευσεν· ὥστε ἀντὶ τοῦ τέως ἐπανθοῦντος αὐτῷ ἐρυθήματος ὠχρὸς ὁ ἄθλιος καὶ ῥικνὸς τὸ σῶμα γεγένηται, καὶ τὰς ᾠδὰς ἁπάσας ἀπομαθὼν ἄσιτος ἐνίοτε καὶ διψαλέος εἰς μέσην ἑσπέραν κάθηται ληρῶν ὁποῖα πολλὰ ἡ Ἀκαδήμεια ἐγὼ ληρεῖν διδάσκω. τὸ δὲ μέγιστον, ὅτι καὶ λοιδορεῖται τῇ Μέθῃ πρὸς ἐμοῦ ἐπαρθεὶς καὶ μυρία κακὰ διέξεισι περὶ αὐτῆς. εἴρηται σχεδὸν τὰ ὑπὲρ τῆς Μέθης. ἤδη καὶ ὑπὲρ ἐμαυτῆς ἐρῶ, καὶ τὸ ἀπὸ τούτου ἐμοὶ ῥευσάτω.
JUSTICE: What in the world will she say in reply to that? Anyhow, pour in the same amount for her in turn.
Δίκη: τί ἄρα πρὸς ταῦτα ἐρεῖ; πλὴν ἀλλʼ ἔγχει τὸ ἴσον ἐν τῷ μέρει.
17. ACADEMY: Heard casually, gentlemen of the jury, the plea which the advocate has made in behalf of Intemperance is quite plausible, but if you give an unprejudiced hearing to my plea also, you will find out that I have done her no wrong at all. This man Polemo, who, she « says, is her servant, was not naturally bad or inclined to Intemperance, but had a nature like mine. But while he was still young and impressionable she preémpted him, with the assistance of Pleasure, who usually helps her, and corrupted the poor fellow, surrendering him unconditionally to dissipation and to light women, so that he had not the slightest remnant of shame. In fact, what she thoughf€ was said on her behalf a moment ago, you should consider said on my behalf. The poor fellow went about from early to late with garlands on his head, flushed with wine, attended by music right through the public square, never sober, making roisterous calls upon everybody, a disgrace to his ancestors and to the whole city and a laughing-stock to strangers. But when he came to my house, it chanced that, as usual, the doors were wide open and I was discoursing about virtue and temperance to such of my friends as were there. Coming in upon us with his flute and his garlands, first of all he began to shout and tried to break up our meeting by disturbing it with his noise. But we paid no attention to him, and as he was not entirely sodden with Intemperance, little by little he grew sober under the influence of our discourses, took off his garlands, silenced his flute-player, became ashamed of his purple mantle, and, awaking, as it were, from profound sleep, saw his own condition and condemned his past life. The flush that came from Intemperance faded and vanished, and he flushed for shame at what he was doing. At length he abandoned her then and there, and took up with me, not because I either invited or constrained him, as this person says, but voluntarily, because he believed the conditions here were better. Please summon him now, that you may see how he has fared at my hands.... Taking this man, gentlemen of the jury, when he was in a ridiculous plight, unable either to talk or to stand on account of his potations, I converted him and sobered him and made him from a slave into a well-behaved, temperate man, very valuable to the Greeks; and he himself is grateful to me for it, as are also his relatives on his account. I have done. It is for you now to consider which of us it was better for him to associate with.
17. Ἀκαδημεια: οὑτωσὶ μὲν ἀκοῦσαι πάνυ εὔλογα, ὦ ἄνδρες δικασταί, ἡ συνήγορος εἴρηκεν ὑπὲρ τῆς Μέθης, ἢν δὲ κἀμοῦ μετʼ εὐνοίας ἀκούσητε, εἴσεσθε ὡς οὐδὲν αὐτὴν ἠδίκηκα. τὸν γὰρ Πολέμωνα τοῦτον, ὅν φησιν ἑαυτῆς οἰκέτην εἶναι, πεφυκότα οὐ φαύλως οὐδὲ κατὰ τὴν Μέθην, ἀλλʼ οἰκεῖον ἐμοὶ τὴν φύσιν, προαρπάσασα νέον ἔτι καὶ ἁπαλὸν ὄντα συναγωνιζομένης τῆς Ἡδονῆς, ἥπερ αὐτῇ τὰ πολλὰ ὑπουργεῖ, διέφθειρε τὸν ἄθλιον τοῖς κώμοις καὶ ταῖς ἑταίραις παρασχοῦσα ἔκδοτον, ὡς μηδὲ μικρὸν αὐτῷ τῆς αἰδοῦς ὑπολείπεσθαι. καὶ ἅ γε ὑπὲρ ἑαυτῆς λέγεσθαι μικρὸν ἔμπροσθεν ᾤετο, ταῦτα ὑπὲρ ἐμοῦ μᾶλλον εἰρῆσθαι νομίσατε· περιῄει γὰρ ἕωθεν ὁ ἄθλιος ἐστεφανωμένος, κραιπαλῶν, διὰ τῆς ἀγορᾶς μέσης καταυλούμενος, οὐδέποτε νήφων, κωμάζων ἐπὶ πάντας, ὕβρις τῶν προγόνων καὶ τῆς πόλεως ὅλης καὶ γέλως τοῖς ξένοις. ἐπεὶ μέντοι γε παρʼ ἐμὲ ἧκεν, ἐγὼ μὲν ἔτυχον, ὥσπερ εἴωθα ποιεῖν, ἀναπεπταμένων τῶν θυρῶν πρὸς τοὺς παρόντας τῶν ἑταίρων λόγους τινὰς περὶ ἀρετῆς καὶ σωφροσύνης διεξιοῦσα· ὁ δὲ μετὰ τοῦ αὐλοῦ καὶ τῶν στεφάνων ἐπιστὰς τὰ μὲν πρῶτα ἐβόα καὶ συγχεῖν ἡμῶν ἐπειρᾶτο τὴν συνουσίαν ἐπιταράξας τῇ βοῇ· ἐπεὶ δὲ οὐδὲν ἡμεῖς ἐπεφροντίκειμεν αὐτοῦ, κατʼ ὀλίγον — οὐ γὰρ τέλεον ἦν διάβροχος τῇ Μέθῃ — ἀνένηφε πρὸς τοὺς λόγους καὶ ἀφῃρεῖτο τοὺς στεφάνους καὶ τὴν αὐλητρίδα κατεσιώπα καὶ ἐπὶ τῇ πορφυρίδι ᾐσχύνετο, καὶ ὥσπερ ἐξ ὕπνου βαθέος ἀνεγρόμενος ἑαυτόν τε ἑώρα ὅπως διέκειτο καὶ τοῦ πάλαι βίου κατεγίγνωσκεν. καὶ τὸ μὲν ἐρύθημα τὸ ἐκ τῆς Μέθης ἀπήνθει καὶ ἠφανίζετο, ἠρυθρία δὲ κατʼ αἰδῶ τῶν δρωμένων· καὶκαὶ τέλος ἀποδρὰς ὥσπερ εἶχεν ηὐτομόλησεν παρʼ ἐμέ, οὔτε ἐπικαλεσαμένης οὔτε βιασαμένης, ὡς αὕτη φησίν, ἐμοῦ, ἀλλʼ ἑκὼν αὐτὸς ἀμείνω ταῦτα εἶναι ὑπολαμβάνων. Καί μοι ἤδη κάλει αὐτόν, ὅπως καταμάθητε ὃν τρόπον διάκειται πρὸς ἐμοῦ. — τοῦτον, ὦ ἄνδρες δικασταί, παραλαβοῦσα γελοίως ἔχοντα, μήτε φωνὴν ἀφιέναι μήτε ἑστάναι ὑπὸ τοῦ ἀκράτου δυνάμενον, ὑπέστρεψα καὶ ἀνένηψα καὶ ἀντὶ ἀνδραπόδου κόσμιον ἄνδρα καὶ σώφρονα καὶ πολλοῦ ἄξιον τοῖς Ἕλλησιν ἀπέδειξα· καὶκαὶ μοι αὐτός τε χάριν οἶδεν ἐπὶ τούτοις καὶ οἱ προσήκοντες ὑπὲρ αὐτοῦ. εἴρηκα· ὑμεῖς δὲ ἤδη σκοπεῖτε ποτέρᾳ ἡμῶν ἄμεινον ἦν αὐτῷ συνεῖναι.