Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I, with teeth clenched and tongue pressed against the roof of my mouth, squeeze, squash, and scorch mind with mind?’ So that’s what I did, until sweat ran from my armpits. It was like when a strong man grabs a weaker man by the head or throat or shoulder and squeezes, squashes, and crushes them. In the same way, with teeth clenched and tongue pressed against the roof of my mouth, I squeezed, squashed, and crushed mind with mind until sweat ran from my armpits. My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. But even such painful feeling did not occupy my mind.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ dantebhi dantamādhāya, jivhāya tāluṁ āhacca, cetasā cittaṁ abhiniggaṇheyyaṁ abhinippīḷeyyaṁ abhisantāpeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, dantebhi dantamādhāya, jivhāya tāluṁ āhacca, cetasā cittaṁ abhiniggaṇhāmi abhinippīḷemi abhisantāpemi. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, dantebhi dantamādhāya jivhāya tāluṁ āhacca cetasā cittaṁ abhiniggaṇhato abhinippīḷayato abhisantāpayato kacchehi sedā muccanti. Seyyathāpi, aggivessana, balavā puriso dubbalataraṁ purisaṁ sīse vā gahetvā khandhe vā gahetvā abhiniggaṇheyya abhinippīḷeyya abhisantāpeyya; evameva kho me, aggivessana, dantebhi dantamādhāya, jivhāya tāluṁ āhacca, cetasā cittaṁ abhiniggaṇhato abhinippīḷayato abhisantāpayato kacchehi sedā muccanti. Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, aggivessana, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ, upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā, sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā dukkhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I practice the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose. But then winds came out my ears making a loud noise, like the puffing of a blacksmith’s bellows. My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. But even such painful feeling did not occupy my mind.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu kaṇṇasotehi vātānaṁ nikkhamantānaṁ adhimatto saddo hoti. Seyyathāpi nāma kammāragaggariyā dhamamānāya adhimatto saddo hoti; evameva kho me, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu kaṇṇasotehi vātānaṁ nikkhamantānaṁ adhimatto saddo hoti. Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, aggivessana, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā. Sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā dukkhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears. But then strong winds ground my head, like a strong man was drilling into my head with a sharp point. My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. But even such painful feeling did not occupy my mind.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā muddhani ūhananti. Seyyathāpi, aggivessana, balavā puriso tiṇhena sikharena muddhani abhimattheyya; evameva kho me, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā muddhani ūhananti. Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, aggivessana, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā. Sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā dukkhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears. But then I got a severe headache, like a strong man was tightening a strong leather strap around my head. My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. But even such painful feeling did not occupy my mind.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā sīse sīsavedanā honti. Seyyathāpi, aggivessana, balavā puriso daḷhena varattakkhaṇḍena sīse sīsaveṭhaṁ dadeyya; evameva kho me, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā sīse sīsavedanā honti. Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, aggivessana, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā. Sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā dukkhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears. But then strong winds carved up my belly, like a deft butcher or their apprentice was slicing my belly open with a sharp meat cleaver. My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. But even such painful feeling did not occupy my mind.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā kucchiṁ parikantanti. Seyyathāpi, aggivessana, dakkho goghātako vā goghātakantevāsī vā tiṇhena govikantanena kucchiṁ parikanteyya; evameva kho me, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimattā vātā kucchiṁ parikantanti. Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, aggivessana, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā. Sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā dukkhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I keep practicing the breathless absorption?’ So I cut off my breathing through my mouth and nose and ears. But then there was a severe burning in my body, like two strong men grabbing a weaker man by the arms to burn and scorch him on a pit of glowing coals. My energy was roused up and unflagging, and my mindfulness was established and lucid, but my body was disturbed, not tranquil, because I’d pushed too hard with that painful striving. But even such painful feeling did not occupy my mind.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ appāṇakaṁyeva jhānaṁ jhāyeyyan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāse uparundhiṁ. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimatto kāyasmiṁ ḍāho hoti. Seyyathāpi, aggivessana, dve balavanto purisā dubbalataraṁ purisaṁ nānābāhāsu gahetvā aṅgārakāsuyā santāpeyyuṁ samparitāpeyyuṁ; evameva kho me, aggivessana, mukhato ca nāsato ca kaṇṇato ca assāsapassāsesu uparuddhesu adhimatto kāyasmiṁ ḍāho hoti. Āraddhaṁ kho pana me, aggivessana, vīriyaṁ hoti asallīnaṁ upaṭṭhitā sati asammuṭṭhā. Sāraddho ca pana me kāyo hoti appaṭippassaddho teneva dukkhappadhānena padhānābhitunnassa sato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā dukkhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Then some deities saw me and said, ‘The ascetic Gotama is dead.’ Others said, ‘He’s not dead, but he’s dying.’ Others said, ‘He’s not dead or dying. The ascetic Gotama is a perfected one, for that is how the perfected ones live.’
Apissu maṁ, aggivessana, devatā disvā evamāhaṁsu: ‘kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo’ti. Ekaccā devatā evamāhaṁsu: ‘na kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo, api ca kālaṁ karotī’ti. Ekaccā devatā evamāhaṁsu: ‘na kālaṅkato samaṇo gotamo, napi kālaṁ karoti, arahaṁ samaṇo gotamo, vihāro tveva so arahato evarūpo hotī’ti.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I practice completely cutting off food?’ But deities came to me and said, ‘Good fellow, don’t practice totally cutting off food. If you do, we’ll infuse heavenly nectar into your pores and you will live on that.’ Then it occurred to me, ‘If I claim to be completely fasting while these deities are infusing heavenly nectar in my pores, that would be a lie on my part.’ So I refused those deities, saying, ‘There’s no need.’
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ sabbaso āhārupacchedāya paṭipajjeyyan’ti. Atha kho maṁ, aggivessana, devatā upasaṅkamitvā etadavocuṁ: ‘mā kho tvaṁ, mārisa, sabbaso āhārupacchedāya paṭipajji. Sace kho tvaṁ, mārisa, sabbaso āhārupacchedāya paṭipajjissasi, tassa te mayaṁ dibbaṁ ojaṁ lomakūpehi ajjhohāressāma, tāya tvaṁ yāpessasī’ti. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘ahañceva kho pana sabbaso ajajjitaṁ paṭijāneyyaṁ, imā ca me devatā dibbaṁ ojaṁ lomakūpehi ajjhohāreyyuṁ, tāya cāhaṁ yāpeyyaṁ, taṁ mamassa musā’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, tā devatā paccācikkhāmi, ‘halan’ti vadāmi.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why don’t I just take a little bit of food each time, a handful of broth made from mung beans, horse gram, chickpeas, or green gram?’ So that’s what I did, until my body became severely emaciated. Due to eating so little, my major and minor limbs became like the joints of an eighty-year-old or a dying man, my bottom became like a camel’s hoof, my vertebrae stuck out like beads on a string, and my ribs were as gaunt as the broken-down rafters on an old barn. Due to eating so little, the gleam of my eyes sank deep in their sockets, like the gleam of water sunk deep down a well. Due to eating so little, my scalp shriveled and withered like a green bitter-gourd in the wind and sun.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘yannūnāhaṁ thokaṁ thokaṁ āhāraṁ āhāreyyaṁ, pasataṁ pasataṁ, yadi vā muggayūsaṁ, yadi vā kulatthayūsaṁ, yadi vā kaḷāyayūsaṁ, yadi vā hareṇukayūsan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, thokaṁ thokaṁ āhāraṁ āhāresiṁ, pasataṁ pasataṁ, yadi vā muggayūsaṁ, yadi vā kulatthayūsaṁ, yadi vā kaḷāyayūsaṁ, yadi vā hareṇukayūsaṁ. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, thokaṁ thokaṁ āhāraṁ āhārayato, pasataṁ pasataṁ, yadi vā muggayūsaṁ, yadi vā kulatthayūsaṁ, yadi vā kaḷāyayūsaṁ, yadi vā hareṇukayūsaṁ, adhimattakasimānaṁ patto kāyo hoti. Seyyathāpi nāma āsītikapabbāni vā kāḷapabbāni vā; evamevassu me aṅgapaccaṅgāni bhavanti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma oṭṭhapadaṁ; evamevassu me ānisadaṁ hoti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma vaṭṭanāvaḷī; evamevassu me piṭṭhikaṇṭako uṇṇatāvanato hoti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma jarasālāya gopānasiyo oluggaviluggā bhavanti; evamevassu me phāsuḷiyo oluggaviluggā bhavanti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma gambhīre udapāne udakatārakā gambhīragatā okkhāyikā dissanti; evamevassu me akkhikūpesu akkhitārakā gambhīragatā okkhāyikā dissanti tāyevappāhāratāya. Seyyathāpi nāma tittakālābu āmakacchinno vātātapena samphuṭito hoti sammilāto; evamevassu me sīsacchavi samphuṭitā hoti sammilātā tāyevappāhāratāya.
Due to eating so little, the skin of my belly stuck to my backbone, so that when I tried to rub the skin of my belly I grabbed my backbone, and when I tried to rub my backbone I rubbed the skin of my belly. Due to eating so little, when I tried to urinate or defecate I fell face down right there. Due to eating so little, when I tried to relieve my body by rubbing my limbs with my hands, the hair, rotted at its roots, fell out.
So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, udaracchaviṁ parimasissāmīti piṭṭhikaṇṭakaṁyeva pariggaṇhāmi, piṭṭhikaṇṭakaṁ parimasissāmīti udaracchaviṁyeva pariggaṇhāmi, yāvassu me, aggivessana, udaracchavi piṭṭhikaṇṭakaṁ allīnā hoti tāyevappāhāratāya. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, vaccaṁ vā muttaṁ vā karissāmīti tattheva avakujjo papatāmi tāyevappāhāratāya. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, imameva kāyaṁ assāsento pāṇinā gattāni anumajjāmi. Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, pāṇinā gattāni anumajjato pūtimūlāni lomāni kāyasmā papatanti tāyevappāhāratāya.
Then some people saw me and said: ‘The ascetic Gotama is black.’ Some said: ‘He’s not black, he’s brown.’ Some said: ‘He’s neither black nor brown. The ascetic Gotama has dingy skin.’ That’s how far the pure, bright complexion of my skin had been ruined by taking so little food.
Apissu maṁ, aggivessana, manussā disvā evamāhaṁsu: ‘kāḷo samaṇo gotamo’ti. Ekacce manussā evamāhaṁsu: ‘na kāḷo samaṇo gotamo, sāmo samaṇo gotamo’ti. Ekacce manussā evamāhaṁsu: ‘na kāḷo samaṇo gotamo, napi sāmo, maṅguracchavi samaṇo gotamo’ti. Yāvassu me, aggivessana, tāva parisuddho chavivaṇṇo pariyodāto upahato hoti tāyevappāhāratāya.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Whatever ascetics and brahmins have experienced painful, sharp, severe, acute feelings due to exertion—whether in the past, future, or present—this is as far as it goes, no-one has done more than this. But I have not achieved any superhuman distinction in knowledge and vision worthy of the noble ones by this severe, grueling work. Could there be another path to awakening?’
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘ye kho keci atītamaddhānaṁ samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayiṁsu, etāvaparamaṁ, nayito bhiyyo. Yepi hi keci anāgatamaddhānaṁ samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayissanti, etāvaparamaṁ, nayito bhiyyo. Yepi hi keci etarahi samaṇā vā brāhmaṇā vā opakkamikā dukkhā tibbā kharā kaṭukā vedanā vedayanti, etāvaparamaṁ, nayito bhiyyo. Na kho panāhaṁ imāya kaṭukāya dukkarakārikāya adhigacchāmi uttari manussadhammā alamariyañāṇadassanavisesaṁ. Siyā nu kho añño maggo bodhāyā’ti?
Then it occurred to me, ‘I recall sitting in the cool shade of a black plum tree while my father the Sakyan was off working. Quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unskillful qualities, I entered and remained in the first absorption, which has the rapture and bliss born of seclusion, while placing the mind and keeping it connected. Could that be the path to awakening?’
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘abhijānāmi kho panāhaṁ pitu sakkassa kammante sītāya jambucchāyāya nisinno vivicceva kāmehi vivicca akusalehi dhammehi savitakkaṁ savicāraṁ vivekajaṁ pītisukhaṁ paṭhamaṁ jhānaṁ upasampajja viharitā. Siyā nu kho eso maggo bodhāyā’ti?
Stemming from that memory came the understanding: ‘<em>That</em> is the path to awakening!’
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, satānusāri viññāṇaṁ ahosi: ‘eseva maggo bodhāyā’ti.
Then it occurred to me, ‘Why am I afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities?’ Then it occurred to me, ‘I’m not afraid of that pleasure, for it has nothing to do with sensual pleasures or unskillful qualities.’
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘kiṁ nu kho ahaṁ tassa sukhassa bhāyāmi, yaṁ taṁ sukhaṁ aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehī’ti? Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘na kho ahaṁ tassa sukhassa bhāyāmi, yaṁ taṁ sukhaṁ aññatreva kāmehi aññatra akusalehi dhammehī’ti.
Then it occurred to me, ‘I can’t achieve that pleasure with a body so severely emaciated. Why don’t I eat some solid food, some rice and porridge?’ So I ate some solid food.
Tassa mayhaṁ, aggivessana, etadahosi: ‘na kho taṁ sukaraṁ sukhaṁ adhigantuṁ evaṁ adhimattakasimānaṁ pattakāyena, yannūnāhaṁ oḷārikaṁ āhāraṁ āhāreyyaṁ odanakummāsan’ti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, oḷārikaṁ āhāraṁ āhāresiṁ odanakummāsaṁ.
Now at that time the group of five mendicants were attending on me, thinking, ‘The ascetic Gotama will tell us of any truth that he realizes.’ But when I ate some solid food, they left disappointed in me, saying, ‘The ascetic Gotama has become indulgent; he has strayed from the struggle and returned to indulgence.’
Tena kho pana maṁ, aggivessana, samayena pañca bhikkhū paccupaṭṭhitā honti: ‘yaṁ kho samaṇo gotamo dhammaṁ adhigamissati, taṁ no ārocessatī’ti. Yato kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, oḷārikaṁ āhāraṁ āhāresiṁ odanakummāsaṁ, atha me te pañca bhikkhū nibbijja pakkamiṁsu: ‘bāhulliko samaṇo gotamo, padhānavibbhanto, āvatto bāhullāyā’ti.
After eating solid food and gathering my strength, quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unskillful qualities, I entered and remained in the first absorption, which has the rapture and bliss born of seclusion, while placing the mind and keeping it connected. But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind.
So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, oḷārikaṁ āhāraṁ āhāretvā, balaṁ gahetvā, vivicceva kāmehi vivicca akusalehi dhammehi savitakkaṁ savicāraṁ vivekajaṁ pītisukhaṁ paṭhamaṁ jhānaṁ upasampajja vihāsiṁ. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
As the placing of the mind and keeping it connected were stilled, I entered and remained in the second absorption, which has the rapture and bliss born of immersion, with internal clarity and mind at one, without placing the mind and keeping it connected. But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind. And with the fading away of rapture, I entered and remained in the third absorption, where I meditated with equanimity, mindful and aware, experiencing for themselves the bliss of which the noble ones declare, ‘Equanimous and mindful, one meditates in bliss.’ But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind. With the giving up of pleasure and pain, and the disappearance of former happiness and sadness, I entered and remained in the fourth absorption, without pleasure or pain, with pure equanimity and mindfulness. But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind.
Vitakkavicārānaṁ vūpasamā ajjhattaṁ sampasādanaṁ cetaso ekodibhāvaṁ avitakkaṁ avicāraṁ samādhijaṁ pītisukhaṁ dutiyaṁ jhānaṁ upasampajja vihāsiṁ. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati. Pītiyā ca virāgā upekkhako ca vihāsiṁ, sato ca sampajāno. Sukhañca kāyena paṭisaṁvedesiṁ yaṁ taṁ ariyā ācikkhanti: ‘upekkhako satimā sukhavihārī’ti tatiyaṁ jhānaṁ upasampajja vihāsiṁ. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati. Sukhassa ca pahānā dukkhassa ca pahānā, pubbeva somanassadomanassānaṁ atthaṅgamā, adukkhamasukhaṁ upekkhāsatipārisuddhiṁ catutthaṁ jhānaṁ upasampajja vihāsiṁ. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward recollection of past lives. I recollected my many kinds of past lives, with features and details.
So evaṁ samāhite citte parisuddhe pariyodāte anaṅgaṇe vigatūpakkilese mudubhūte kammaniye ṭhite āneñjappatte pubbenivāsānussatiñāṇāya cittaṁ abhininnāmesiṁ. So anekavihitaṁ pubbenivāsaṁ anussarāmi, seyyathidaṁ—ekampi jātiṁ …pe… iti sākāraṁ sauddesaṁ anekavihitaṁ pubbenivāsaṁ anussarāmi.
This was the first knowledge, which I achieved in the first watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute. But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind.
Ayaṁ kho me, aggivessana, rattiyā paṭhame yāme paṭhamā vijjā adhigatā; avijjā vihatā, vijjā uppannā; tamo vihato, āloko uppanno; yathā taṁ appamattassa ātāpino pahitattassa viharato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward knowledge of the death and rebirth of sentient beings. With clairvoyance that is purified and superhuman, I saw sentient beings passing away and being reborn—inferior and superior, beautiful and ugly, in a good place or a bad place. I understood how sentient beings pass on according to their deeds.
So evaṁ samāhite citte parisuddhe pariyodāte anaṅgaṇe vigatūpakkilese mudubhūte kammaniye ṭhite āneñjappatte sattānaṁ cutūpapātañāṇāya cittaṁ abhininnāmesiṁ. So dibbena cakkhunā visuddhena atikkantamānusakena satte passāmi cavamāne upapajjamāne hīne paṇīte suvaṇṇe dubbaṇṇe sugate duggate yathākammūpage satte pajānāmi …pe…
This was the second knowledge, which I achieved in the middle watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute. But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind.
ayaṁ kho me, aggivessana, rattiyā majjhime yāme dutiyā vijjā adhigatā; avijjā vihatā, vijjā uppannā; tamo vihato, āloko uppanno; yathā taṁ appamattassa ātāpino pahitattassa viharato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
When my mind had immersed in samādhi like this—purified, bright, flawless, rid of corruptions, pliable, workable, steady, and imperturbable—I extended it toward knowledge of the ending of defilements. I truly understood: ‘This is suffering’ … ‘This is the origin of suffering’ … ‘This is the cessation of suffering’ … ‘This is the practice that leads to the cessation of suffering.’ I truly understood: ‘These are defilements’ … ‘This is the origin of defilements’ … ‘This is the cessation of defilements’ … ‘This is the practice that leads to the cessation of defilements.’
So evaṁ samāhite citte parisuddhe pariyodāte anaṅgaṇe vigatūpakkilese mudubhūte kammaniye ṭhite āneñjappatte āsavānaṁ khayañāṇāya cittaṁ abhininnāmesiṁ. So ‘idaṁ dukkhan’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ, ‘ayaṁ dukkhasamudayo’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ, ‘ayaṁ dukkhanirodho’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ, ‘ayaṁ dukkhanirodhagāminī paṭipadā’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ. ‘Ime āsavā’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ, ‘ayaṁ āsavasamudayo’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ, ‘ayaṁ āsavanirodho’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ, ‘ayaṁ āsavanirodhagāminī paṭipadā’ti yathābhūtaṁ abbhaññāsiṁ.
Knowing and seeing like this, my mind was freed from the defilements of sensuality, desire to be reborn, and ignorance. When it was freed, I knew it was freed.
Tassa me evaṁ jānato evaṁ passato kāmāsavāpi cittaṁ vimuccittha, bhavāsavāpi cittaṁ vimuccittha, avijjāsavāpi cittaṁ vimuccittha. Vimuttasmiṁ vimuttamiti ñāṇaṁ ahosi.
I understood: ‘Rebirth is ended; the spiritual journey has been completed; what had to be done has been done; there is nothing further for this place.’
‘Khīṇā jāti, vusitaṁ brahmacariyaṁ, kataṁ karaṇīyaṁ, nāparaṁ itthattāyā’ti abbhaññāsiṁ.
This was the third knowledge, which I achieved in the last watch of the night. Ignorance was banished and knowledge arose; darkness was banished and light arose, as happens for a meditator who is diligent, keen, and resolute. But even such pleasant feeling did not occupy my mind.
Ayaṁ kho me, aggivessana, rattiyā pacchime yāme tatiyā vijjā adhigatā; avijjā vihatā, vijjā uppannā; tamo vihato, āloko uppanno; yathā taṁ appamattassa ātāpino pahitattassa viharato. Evarūpāpi kho me, aggivessana, uppannā sukhā vedanā cittaṁ na pariyādāya tiṭṭhati.
Aggivessana, I recall teaching the Dhamma to an assembly of many hundreds, and each person thought that I was teaching the Dhamma especially for them. But it should not be seen like this. The Realized One teaches others only so that they can understand. When that talk was finished, I stilled, settled, unified, and immersed my mind in samādhi internally in the same meditation subject as a basis of immersion as before, in which I regularly meditate.”
Abhijānāmi kho panāhaṁ, aggivessana, anekasatāya parisāya dhammaṁ desetā. Apissu maṁ ekameko evaṁ maññati: ‘mamevārabbha samaṇo gotamo dhammaṁ desetī’ti. Na kho panetaṁ, aggivessana, evaṁ daṭṭhabbaṁ; yāvadeva viññāpanatthāya tathāgato paresaṁ dhammaṁ deseti. So kho ahaṁ, aggivessana, tassāyeva kathāya pariyosāne, tasmiṁyeva purimasmiṁ samādhinimitte ajjhattameva cittaṁ saṇṭhapemi sannisādemi ekodiṁ karomi samādahāmi, yena sudaṁ niccakappaṁ viharāmī”ti.
“I’d believe that of the worthy Gotama, just like a perfected one, a fully awakened Buddha. But do you ever recall sleeping during the day?”
“Okappaniyametaṁ bhoto gotamassa yathā taṁ arahato sammāsambuddhassa. Abhijānāti kho pana bhavaṁ gotamo divā supitā”ti?
“I do recall that in the last month of the summer, I have spread out my outer robe folded in four and lain down in the lion’s posture—on the right side, placing one foot on top of the other—mindful and aware.”
“Abhijānāmahaṁ, aggivessana, gimhānaṁ pacchime māse pacchābhattaṁ piṇḍapātapaṭikkanto catugguṇaṁ saṅghāṭiṁ paññapetvā dakkhiṇena passena sato sampajāno niddaṁ okkamitā”ti.
“Some ascetics and brahmins call that a deluded abiding.”
“Etaṁ kho, bho gotama, eke samaṇabrāhmaṇā sammohavihārasmiṁ vadantī”ti?
“That’s not how to define whether someone is deluded or not. But as to how to define whether someone is deluded or not, listen and apply your mind well, I will speak.”
“Na kho, aggivessana, ettāvatā sammūḷho vā hoti asammūḷho vā. Api ca, aggivessana, yathā sammūḷho ca hoti asammūḷho ca, taṁ suṇāhi, sādhukaṁ manasi karohi, bhāsissāmī”ti.
“Yes, worthy sir,” replied Saccaka.
“Evaṁ, bho”ti kho saccako nigaṇṭhaputto bhagavato paccassosi.
The Buddha said this:
Bhagavā etadavoca:
“Anyone who has not given up the defilements that are corrupting, leading to future lives, hurtful, resulting in suffering and future rebirth, old age, and death is deluded, I say. For it’s not giving up the defilements that makes you deluded. Anyone who has given up the defilements that are corrupting, leading to future lives, hurtful, resulting in suffering and future rebirth, old age, and death—is not deluded, I say. For it’s giving up the defilements that makes you not deluded.
“Yassa kassaci, aggivessana, ye āsavā saṅkilesikā ponobbhavikā sadarā dukkhavipākā āyatiṁ jātijarāmaraṇiyā appahīnā, tamahaṁ ‘sammūḷho’ti vadāmi. Āsavānañhi, aggivessana, appahānā sammūḷho hoti. Yassa kassaci, aggivessana, ye āsavā saṅkilesikā ponobbhavikā sadarā dukkhavipākā āyatiṁ jātijarāmaraṇiyā pahīnā, tamahaṁ ‘asammūḷho’ti vadāmi. Āsavānañhi, aggivessana, pahānā asammūḷho hoti.
The Realized One has given up the defilements that are corrupting, leading to future lives, hurtful, resulting in suffering and future rebirth, old age, and death. He has cut them off at the root, made them like a palm stump, obliterated them so they are unable to arise in the future. Just as a palm tree with its crown cut off is incapable of further growth, in the same way, the Realized One has given up the defilements so they are unable to arise in the future.”
Tathāgatassa kho, aggivessana, ye āsavā saṅkilesikā ponobbhavikā sadarā dukkhavipākā āyatiṁ jātijarāmaraṇiyā pahīnā ucchinnamūlā tālāvatthukatā anabhāvaṅkatā āyatiṁ anuppādadhammā. Seyyathāpi, aggivessana, tālo matthakacchinno abhabbo puna virūḷhiyā; evameva kho, aggivessana, tathāgatassa ye āsavā saṅkilesikā ponobbhavikā sadarā dukkhavipākā āyatiṁ jātijarāmaraṇiyā pahīnā ucchinnamūlā tālāvatthukatā anabhāvaṅkatā āyatiṁ anuppādadhammā”ti.
When he had spoken, Saccaka said to him, “It’s incredible, worthy Gotama, it’s amazing! How when the worthy Gotama is repeatedly attacked with inappropriate and intrusive criticism, the complexion of his skin brightens and the color of his face becomes clear, just like a perfected one, a fully awakened Buddha!
Evaṁ vutte, saccako nigaṇṭhaputto bhagavantaṁ etadavoca: “acchariyaṁ, bho gotama, abbhutaṁ, bho gotama. Yāvañcidaṁ bhoto gotamassa evaṁ āsajja āsajja vuccamānassa, upanītehi vacanappathehi samudācariyamānassa, chavivaṇṇo ceva pariyodāyati, mukhavaṇṇo ca vippasīdati, yathā taṁ arahato sammāsambuddhassa.
I recall taking on Pūraṇa Kassapa in debate. He dodged the issue, distracting the discussion with irrelevant points, and displaying annoyance, hate, and bitterness. But when the worthy Gotama is repeatedly attacked with inappropriate and intrusive criticism, the complexion of his skin brightens and the color of his face becomes clear, just like a perfected one, a fully awakened Buddha.
Abhijānāmahaṁ, bho gotama, pūraṇaṁ kassapaṁ vādena vādaṁ samārabhitā. Sopi mayā vādena vādaṁ samāraddho aññenaññaṁ paṭicari, bahiddhā kathaṁ apanāmesi, kopañca dosañca appaccayañca pātvākāsi. Bhoto pana gotamassa evaṁ āsajja āsajja vuccamānassa, upanītehi vacanappathehi samudācariyamānassa, chavivaṇṇo ceva pariyodāyati, mukhavaṇṇo ca vippasīdati, yathā taṁ arahato sammāsambuddhassa.
I recall taking on the bamboo-staffed ascetic Gosāla, Ajita of the hair blanket, Pakudha Kaccāyana, Sañjaya Belaṭṭhiputta, and the Jain ascetic of the Ñātika clan in debate. They all dodged the issue, distracting the discussion with irrelevant points, and displaying annoyance, hate, and bitterness. But when the worthy Gotama is repeatedly attacked with inappropriate and intrusive criticism, the complexion of his skin brightens and the color of his face becomes clear, just like a perfected one, a fully awakened Buddha.
Abhijānāmahaṁ, bho gotama, makkhaliṁ gosālaṁ …pe… ajitaṁ kesakambalaṁ … pakudhaṁ kaccāyanaṁ … sañjayaṁ belaṭṭhaputtaṁ … nigaṇṭhaṁ nāṭaputtaṁ vādena vādaṁ samārabhitā. Sopi mayā vādena vādaṁ samāraddho aññenaññaṁ paṭicari, bahiddhā kathaṁ apanāmesi, kopañca dosañca appaccayañca pātvākāsi. Bhoto pana gotamassa evaṁ āsajja āsajja vuccamānassa, upanītehi vacanappathehi samudācariyamānassa, chavivaṇṇo ceva pariyodāyati, mukhavaṇṇo ca vippasīdati, yathā taṁ arahato sammāsambuddhassa.
Well, now, worthy Gotama, I must go. I have many duties, and much to do.”
Handa ca dāni mayaṁ, bho gotama, gacchāma. Bahukiccā mayaṁ, bahukaraṇīyā”ti.
“Please, Aggivessana, go at your convenience.”
“Yassadāni tvaṁ, aggivessana, kālaṁ maññasī”ti.
Then Saccaka, the son of Jain parents, having approved and agreed with what the Buddha said, rose from his seat and left.
Atha kho saccako nigaṇṭhaputto bhagavato bhāsitaṁ abhinanditvā anumoditvā uṭṭhāyāsanā pakkāmīti.
Mahāsaccakasuttaṁ niṭṭhitaṁ chaṭṭhaṁ.