STICHUS:Master, whether I’m silent or speak, I’m sure you knowhow many hardships I’ve endured in your service; now, on my arrival home, I wish to spend in freedom this one day after these many hardships.
Stichvs:Ere, sí ego taceam seu loquar, scio scire tequam multas tecum miserias mulcaverim.nunc hunc diem unum ex illis multis miseriisvolo mé eleutheria capere advenientem domum.
EPIGNOMUS:You ask what’s just and right. Stlchus, you may take this day for yourself; I don’t object to it. Go where you like.A cask, too, of old wine, I give you to drink.
Epignomvs:Et ius et aequom postulas: sumas, Stiche.in hunc diem te nil moror; abi quo lubet.cadum tibi veteris vini propino.
STICHUS:O, grand! I’ll have my mistress this day.
Stichvs:Papae,ducam hodie amicam.
EPIGNOMUS:Even ten, so long as it is at your own expense.
Epignomvs:Vel decem, dum de tuo.
STICHUS:What …?
Stichvs:Quid? hoc etiam unum?
EPIGNOMUS:What …?
Epignomvs:Quid id autem unumst? expedi.
STICHUS:I’ll go and dine …’Tis thus it pleases me …
Stichvs:Ad cenam ibone?
EPIGNOMUS:Where do you dine to-day?
Epignomvs:Si vocatu's vocatus es, censeo.
STICHUS:This plan have I thus resolved upon. I have a mistress here in the neighbourhood, Stephanium, the servantmaid of your brother. I’m going to invite her; I’ll take her to a pic-nic entertainment at her fellow-servant’s, Sagarinus We both have the same mistress; we are rivals.
Stichvs:Sic hoc placet; rogatu necne, nil moror.
EPIGNOMUS:Come then, conduct them in. I grant you this day.
Epignomvs:Vbi cenas hodie?
STICHUS:Hold me to blame if I don’t make the most of it. Troth now, I’ll pass through the garden to my mistress, to engage her beforehand for me this evening; at the same time I’ll give my contribution, and bid the dinner to be cooked at Sagarinus’s,or else I’ll go myself and make my marketing as caterer. Sagarinus, … … a servant … for my … with stripes … to take him home well thrashed,I’ll make all things to be in readiness here; but I’m delaying myself. And don’t you be surprised (to the AUDIENCE) that men, who are slaves, drink, court, and give invitations to dinner? This is allowed us at Athens. But when I think of it, rather than meet with censure, there’s here, too,another door to the back buildings of our house. I’ll go that way to market; by that way I’ll bring back the provisions—through the garden there’s a passage that communicates with both houses. (To the SLAVES.) Do you follow me this way. I surely will pull this day to bits.(Goes into the house of EPIGNOMUS.) (Enter GELASIMUS.)GELASIMUS: (to himself.)I’ve consulted my books; I’m as sure as possible,that by my funny bon mots I shall recover my patron. Now I’m going to see whether he has arrived by this from the harbour, that when he comes I may smooth him down with my speeches.
Stichvs:Sic hanc rationem institi:amicam ego habeo Stephanium hinc ex proxumo,tui frátris ancillam: eo condixi in symbolamad cenam, ad eius consérvom Sangarinum Syrum.eademst amica ambobus, rivales sumus.
EPIGNOMUS:Surely, this is Gelasimus, the Parasite, that’s coming.
Epignomvs:Age abduce hasce intro. hunc tibi dedo diem.Stichvs:Meam culpam habeto, nisi probe excruciavero.iam hercle ego per hortum ad amicam transibo meammi hanc occupatum noctem; eadem symbolamdabo et iubebo ad Sangarinum cenam coqui.aut egomet ibo atque opsonabo opsonium.Sangarinus scio iam hic aderit cum domino suo,servos homo, qui nisi temperi ad cenam meat,advorsitores pol cum verberibus decetdari, uti eum verberabundi adducant domum.parata res faciam ut sit. egomet me moror.atque id ne vos miremini, hominis servolospotare, amare atque ad cenam condicere:licet haec Athenis nobis. sed quom cogito,potius quam invidiam inveniam, est etiam hic ostiumaliud posticum nostrarum harunc aedium:[posticam partem magis utuntur aedium]ea ibo opsonatum, eadem referam opsonium:per hortum utroque commeatus continet.ite hac secundum vos me. ego hunc lacero diem.—
GELASIMUS: (to himself.)With lucky auspices, by my troth, this day did I come out of doors;since an omen auspiciously befel me. This was beheld by me; how a weasel carried off a mouse close at my feet. For as she found sustenance for herself this day, so do I hope that I shall do, as the augury predicts.(Sees EPIGNOMUS.) Surely this is Epignomus that’s standing here; I’ll go and address him. My dear Epignomus, how pleased I am to see you now; how my tears are starting forth for very joy. Have you all along enjoyed your health?
Gelasimvs:Libros inspexi; tam confido quam potis,me meum optenturum regem ridiculis meis.nunc interviso, iamne a portu advenerit,ut eum ádvenientem meis dictis deleniam.
EPIGNOMUS:With care it has been preserved.
Epignomvs:Hic quidém Gelasimus est parasitus, qui venit.
GELASIMUS:Right heartily I wish you health.
Gelasimvs:Auspicio hodie óptumo exivi foras:mustela murem ábstulit praeter pedes;cum strena óbscaevavit; spectatum hoc mihist.nam ut illa vitam repperit hodie sibi,item me spero facturum: augurium hac facit.Epignómus hic quidemst qui ástat. ibo atque adloquar.⟨o⟩ Épignome, ut ego nunc te conspicio libens,ut prae laetitia lacrimae prosiliunt mihi.valuistin usque?
EPIGNOMUS:You speak kindly, and like a friend. May the Gods grant what you wish.
Epignomvs:Sustentatumst sedulo.
GELASIMUS:…
Gelasimvs:Propino tibi salutem plenis faucibus.
EPIGNOMUS:I, sup there with you?
Epignomvs:Bene atque amice dicis. di dent quae velis.
GELASIMUS:Since you are returned safe.
Gelasimvs:Cenem illi apud te, quoniam salvos advenis.
EPIGNOMUS:Really, an engagement has been made already; but I give you thanks.
Epignomvs:Locatast opera nunc quidem; tam gratiast.
GELASIMUS:Do promise me.
Gelasimvs:Promitte.
EPIGNOMUS:It’s settled.
Epignomvs:Certumst.
GELASIMUS:But do, I say.
Gelasimvs:Sic face inquam.
EPIGNOMUS:The thing’s agreed on.
Epignomvs:Certa res.
GELASIMUS:By my troth, you’d do it with much pleasure to me.
Gelasimvs:Lubente me hercle facies.
EPIGNOMUS:I know that well.When an opportunity shall come, it shall be so.
Epignomvs:Idem ego istuc scio.quando usus veniet, fiet.
GELASIMUS:Now, then, is the opportunity.
Gelasimvs:Nunc ergo usus est.
EPIGNOMUS:I’ faith, I cannot.
Epignomvs:Non edepol possum.
GELASIMUS:Why make difficulties? Do consider; I have I know not what luxuries at hand.
Gelasimvs:Quid gravare? censeas.nescio quid vero hábeo in mundo.
EPIGNOMUS:Do be off, now; seek for yourself another guest for to-day.
Epignomvs:I modo,alium convivam quaerito tibi in hunc diem.
GELASIMUS:You promise, then?
Gelasimvs:Quin tu promittis?
EPIGNOMUS:I would make no difficulty if I could.
Epignomvs:Non graver, si possiem.
GELASIMUS:Really, on my word, one thing, for sure, I promise you, I’d entertain you with pleasure, beyond a doubt, if you would promise.
Gelasimvs:Vnum quidem hercle certo promitto tibi:libens accipiam certo, si promiseris.
EPIGNOMUS:Adieu!(Moving.)
Epignomvs:Valeas.
GELASIMUS:Have you resolved?
Gelasimvs:Certumnest?
EPIGNOMUS:I have resolved. I shall dine at home.
Epignomvs:Certum. cenabo domi.
GELASIMUS: (aside.)Since nothing has been effected this way, I’ll therefore approach him by a more open path, and I’ll speak plainly out.(To EPIGNOMUS.) Since you, yourself, are not willing to promise to come to me,should you like that I should come to dine with you?
Gelasimvs:[Quando quidem tu ad me non vis promittere]sed—quoniam nil processit hac, ego iveroapertiore magis via; ita plane loquar:vin ad te ad cenam veniam?
EPIGNOMUS:If it were possible, I should like it; but here are nine other people coming to dine at my house.
Epignomvs:Si possim, velim;verum hic apud me cenant alieni novem.
GELASIMUS:For my part, I don’t ask that I should recline on the couch; you know that I’m a man for the lower seats.
Gelasimvs:Hau postulo equidem med in lecto accumbere:scis tu me esse unisubselli virum.
EPIGNOMUS:But these are deputies of a people, tip-top men they come here as public ambassadors from Ambracia.
Epignomvs:At ei óratores sunt popli, summi viri;Ambracia veniunt huc legati publice.
GELASIMUS:Let then the deputies of a people, your tip-top men, recline at the tip-top place; I, the lowest, in the lowest quarter.
Gelasimvs:Ergo oratores populi, summates viri,summi accubent, ego infimatis infimus.
EPIGNOMUS:It isn’t proper for you to be entertained among deputies.
Epignomvs:Haud aequomst te inter oratores accipi.
GELASIMUS:I ’faith, and I—I’m a deputy, too, but little it does avail me.
Gelasimvs:Equidem hercle orator sum, sed procedit parum.
EPIGNOMUS:I intend that to-morrow we shall dine upon the scraps. Sincerely, farewell.(Goes into his house.)
Epignomvs:Cras de reliquiis nos volo. multum vale.—
GELASIMUS:By my troth,’tis clear that I’m undone, and by no fault of my own. The number is less than it was before by one Gelasimus. I’m resolved, hereafter, never to believe in a weasel,for I know of no beast more uncertain than her. She who herself is ten times a day shifting her place, from her have I taken my omens in matters of life and death to me! I’m determined to call my friends together, to take counsel how by rule I must starve henceforth.(Exit.)
Gelasimvs:Perii hercle vero plane, nihil obnoxie.uno Gelasimo minus est quam dudum fuit.certumst mustelae posthac numquam credere,nam incertiorem nullam novi bestiam;quaen eapse deciens in die mutat locum,ea ego auspicavi ín re capitali mea?certumst amicos convocare, ut consulamqua lege nunc med essurire oporteat.—
(Enter ANTIPHO and PAMPHILUS.)ANTIPHO:So may the Gods favour me, and preserve for me my daughters, it is a pleasure to me, Pamphilus, that I see you both return home to your native land, your business prosperously managed, yourself and your brother.
Antipho:Íta me di bene amént measque mihi [bene] servassint filias,ut mihi volup est, Pamphilippe, quia vos in patriam domumrediisse video bene gesta re ambos, te et fratrem tuom.
PAMPHILUS:I should have heard enough from you, Antipho, did I not see that you are friendly to me; now, since I’ve found that you are my friend, I’ll give you credence.
Pamphilippvs:Satis abs te accipiam, nisi videam mihi te amicum esse, Antipho;nunc quia té amicum mihi experior esse, credetur tibi.
ANTIPHO:I would invite you to my house to dinner, had not your brother told me that you were going to dine at his house to-day, when he invited myself to his house to dinner. And it would have been more proper for me to give you an entertainment on your arrival, than to engage myself to him, were it not that I didn’t wish to disoblige him. Now I don’t wish with words alone to insinuate myself into your favour;to-morrow you shall be at my house, both you and he, with your wives.
Antipho:Vocem ego te ad me ad cenam, frater tuos ni dixisset mihi,te apud se cenaturum esse hodie, quom me ad se ad cenam vocat.et magis pár fuerat me vobis dare cenam advenientibus,quam me ad illúm promittere, nisi nollem ei advorsarier.nunc me gratiam abs te inire verbis nil desidero:cras apud me éritis et tu et ille cum vostris uxoribus.
PAMPHILUS:Then, the day after, at my house; for it was yesterday he invited me for to-day. But am I quite reconciled to you, Antipho?
Pamphilippvs:At apud mé perendie. nam ille heri me iam vocaveratin hunc diem. sed satin ego tecum pacificatus sum, Antipho?
ANTIPHO:Since you have thus thrived in your affairs, as it behoves yourselves and persons friendly disposed to wish, let there be good-will and intercourse between us. Take you care to think of this;according as wealth is obtained by each man, so does he experience his friends. If his fortunes are flourishing, so are his friends true; if his prospects decline, so, too, do his friends decline. Fortune finds friends.(from his house.)
Antipho:Quando ita rem gessistis ut vos velle amicosque addecet,pax commersque est vobis mecum. nam hoc tu facito ut cogites:ut cuique homini res paratast, périnde amicis utitur:si res firma, ⟨item⟩ fírmi amici sunt; sin res laxe labat,itidem amici conlabascunt: res amicos invenit.
EPIGNOMUS: (to himself.)I’m now returned.’Tis a great delight, if you have been long from home, when you return home again, if no anxieties come in contact with your feelings.But, in my absence, so well has my wife taken care of my private affairs, that she has made me free and unembarrassed by anxieties. But, see, here’s my brother Pamphilus, walking with his father-in-law.
Epignomvs:Iam redeo. nimiast voluptas, ubi diu afueris domo,domum ubi rédieris, sí tibi nullast aegritudo animo obviam.nam ita me absente familiarem rem uxor curavit meam,omnium me éxilem atque inanem fecit aegritudinum.sed eccum fratrem Pamphilippum, incedit cum socero suo.
PAMPHILUS:How fares it, Epignomus?
Pamphilippvs:Quid agitur, Epignome?
EPIGNOMUS:How with you? How long since you came into harbour?
Epignomvs:Quid tu? quam dudum in portum venis?
PAMPHILUS:Not very long ago.
Pamphilippvs:Hau longissume.
EPIGNOMUS: (aside.)And is it since then that he has become on smooth terms with you?
Epignomvs:Postilla iam iste est tranquillus tibi?
ANTIPHO: (overhearing.)More smooth than the sea, on which you have both been borne.
Antipho:Magis quam mare quo ambo estis vecti.
EPIGNOMUS:You do as you are wont to do other things. Do we unlade the ship to-day, brother?
Epignomvs:Facis ut alias res soles.hodiene exoneramus navem, frater?
PAMPHILUS:I would rather go quietly to work. Let’s rather lade ourselves with delights in their turn. How soon will the dinner be cooked? I haven’t breakfasted to-day.
Pamphilippvs:Clementer volo.nos potius oneremus nosmet vícissatim voluptátibus.quam mox coctast cena? inpransus ego sum.
EPIGNOMUS:Go in-doors to my house and bathe.
Epignomvs:Abi intro ad me et lava.
PAMPHILUS:I’ll only step home to my own house, to salute the Gods and my wife.If I do that as I wish, I’ll forthwith return to your house.
Pamphilippvs:Deos salutatum atque uxorem módo intro devortor domum;haec si ita ut volo conficio, continuo ad te transeo.
EPIGNOMUS:But your wife is hastening to come here with her sister.PAMPHILUS:’Tis very good; there will then be the less delay on that account. I shall be at your house this instant.
Epignomvs:Apud nos eccillam festinat cum sorore uxor tua.Pamphilippvs:Optumest, iam istoc morai minus erit. iam ego apud te ero.
ANTIPHO: (to PAMPHILUS.)Before you go away, in your presence I wish to relate a single story to him.
Antipho:Prius quam abis, praesente ted huic apologum agere unum volo.Pamphilippvs:Maxume.Antipho:Fuit olim, quasi ego sum, senex; ei filiaeduae erant, quasi nunc meae sunt; eae erant duobus nuptae fratribus,quasi nunc meae sunt vobis.
EPIGNOMUS:By all means.
Epignomvs:Miror quo evasurust apologus.
ANTIPHO:There was once an old gentleman, just as I now am; he had two daughters, such as mine now are; they were married to two brothers,just as mine now are to yourselves.PAMPHILUS:I wonder how the story is to turn out?
Antipho:Erant minori illi adulescenti fidicina et tibicina,peregre advexerat, quasi nunc tu; sed ille erat caeleps senex,quasi ego nunc sum.Epignomvs:Perge porro. praesens hic quidem est apologus.
ANTIPHO:One of these young men had, as you (to PAMPHILUS) now have, a damsel, a music-girl; he had brought her from abroad, as you have now done. Now, this old gentleman was a widower, just as I now am.PAMPHILUS:Do proceed; this story is really à propos.
Antipho:Deinde senex ille illi dixit, cuius erat tibicina,quasi ego nunc tibi dico:Epignomvs:Ausculto atque animum advorto sedulo.
ANTIPHO:Then said this old gentleman to him to whom the music-girl belonged, just as I now say to you—PAMPHILUS:I’m listening, and carefully giving heed.
Antipho:“Ego tibi meam filiam, bene quicum cubitares, dedi:nunc mihi reddi ego aequom esse abs te quicum cubitem censeo.”Epignomvs:Quis istuc dicit? an ille quasi tu?
ANTIPHO:“I gave you my daughter, to be a comfortable bedfellow for you; now, I think it fair that one should be given me in return by you, to be my bed-fellow.”PAMPHILUS:Who says that? Does he say it just as though you were to say it?
Antipho:Quasi ego nunc dico tibi.“Immo duas dabo,” inquit ille adulescens “una si parumst;et si duarum paenitebit,” inquit “addentur duae.”Epignomvs:Quis istuc quaeso? an ille quasi ego?
ANTIPHO:Just as I now say it to you.“Aye, I’ll give you two of them,” says this young man, “if one’s too little; and if you are not satisfied with two,” says he, “two more shall be added.”PAMPHILUS:Prithee, who says that? Does he say it just as though I were to say it?
Antipho:Is ipse quasi tu. ⟨tum⟩ senexille quasi ego: “si vis,” inquit “quattuor sane dato,dúm equidem hercle quod edint addas, meum ne contruncent cibum.”Epignomvs:Videlicet parcum illum fuisse senem, qui ⟨illi istaec⟩ dixerit,quóm ille, illi qui pollicetur, eum cibum poposcerit.
ANTIPHO:He says it just as though you were to say it. Then says this old gentleman, just as though I were to say it, “Well, give me four, if you like, so long only as, i’ faith, you find them something to eat as well, that they mayn’t consume my victuals.”PAMPHILUS:Why surely it must have been a stingy old chap to say that, in asking food as well of him who promised them to him.
Antipho:Videlicet non fuisse illum aequom ádulescentem, qui ilicoubi ille poscit denegavit dare se granum tritici.hercle qui aequom postulabat ille senex, quando quidemfiliae illae dederat dotem, accipere pro tibicina.Epignomvs:Hercle ille quidem certo adulescens docte vorsutus fuit,qui seni illi concubinam dare dotatam noluit.
ANTIPHO:Why surely, this young man must have been a good-for-nothing fellow, who forthwith, when the other asked him, refused to give him a grain of wheat. But, i’ troth, the old gentleman asked what was fair, inasmuch asthe dowry which he had given to his daughter, he wished him to have as an equivalent for the music-girl.
Antipho:Senex quidem voluit, si posset, indipisci de cibo;quia nequit, qua lege licuit velle dixit fieri.“fiat” ille inquít adulescens. “facis benigne” inquit senex.“habeon rem pactam?” inquit. “faciam ita” inquit “ut fieri voles.”sed ego ibo intro et gratulabor vostrum adventum filiis.poste ibo lautum ín pyelum, ibi fovebo sénectutem meam.post ubi lavero, otiosus vos opperiar accubans.—
PAMPHILUS:I’ faith, for sure I really do think that the young man was well advised, who wouldn’t give a mistress to that old fellow in return for the dower.ANTIPHO:The old gentleman wished, indeed, if he could, to bargain for their maintenance; because he couldn’t, he said he wished it to be done on what terms it might.“Done,” said this young man. “You do me a kindness,” said the old gentleman. “Have I the thing agreed upon?” said he. “I’ll do even as you wish it to be done,” said the other. But I’ll be off in-doors, and congratulate my daughters on your arrival. Then I’ll go wash me at the bath; there will I take all care of my old age; after that, when I’ve bathed, lying down, I’ll await you at my leisure.(Exit.)
Pamphilippvs:Graphicum mortalem Antiphonem, ut apologum fecit quam fabre.Epignomvs:Etiam nunc scelestus ⟨se⟩ esse ducit pro adulescentulo.dabitur homini amica, noctu quae in lecto occentet senem;namque edepol aliud quidem illi quid amica opus sit nescio.
PAMPHILUS:A funny mortal, Antipho; how cleverly he did make up his story.Even yet the rogue considers himself a young man. A mistress shall be given to the fellow, to sing to the old chap at night in bed; for, i’ faith, indeed, I know not of what other use a mistress can be to him.But how fares our Parasite, Gelasimus? Is he well, too?
Pamphilippvs:Sed quid agit parasitus noster Gelasimus? etiam valet?
EPIGNOMUS:I’ faith, I saw the fellow not so very long ago.
Epignomvs:Vidi edepol hominem haud perdudum.
PAMPHILUS:How fares he?
Pamphilippvs:Quid agit?
EPIGNOMUS:Like one half-starved.
Epignomvs:Quod famelicus.
PAMPHILUS:Why didn’t you invite the fellow to your house to dinner?
Pamphilippvs:Quin vocavisti hominem ad cenam?
EPIGNOMUS:That on my arrival I mightn’t be wasting anything. But see, here’s the wolf in the Fable; here he is in person with his ravenous fit.
Epignomvs:Ne quid advéniens perderem.atque eccum tibi lúpum in sermone: praesens esuriens adest.
PAMPHILUS:We’ll have some sport with the fellow.
Pamphilippvs:Ludificemur hominem.
EPIGNOMUS:You put me in mind of a plan I had already resolved on.
Epignomvs:Capti consili memorem mones.
(Enter GELASIMUS.)GELASIMUS:……(to the AUDIENCE.)But as I had begun to tell you; while I have been absent hence,I’ve now been consulting with my friends and with my relatives. They have been my advisers to the effect that I should this very day kill myself with starvation. But don’t I see Pamphilus with his brother Epignomus? Yes,’tis he. I’ll accost the man. (Goes up to PAMPHILUS.) O longed-for Pamphilus! O my salvation! O my life! O my delight! right welcome. I rejoice thatyou’ve returned safe from abroad to your native land. Welcome.
Gelasimvs:Sed ita ut occepi narrare vobis: quom hic non adfui,cúm amicis deliberavi iam et cum cognatis meis.ita mi auctores fuere, ut egomet me hodie iugularem fame.sed videone ego Pamphilippum cum fratre Epignomo? atque is est.adgrediar hominem. ⟨o⟩ sperate Pamphilippe, o spes mea,o mea vita, o mea voluptas, salve. salvom gaudeoperegre te in patriam rediisse.
PAMPHILUS:Welcome, Gelasimus.
Pamphilippvs:Salvo salve, Gelasime.
GELASIMUS:Have you been quite well?
Gelasimvs:Valuistin bene?
PAMPHILUS:I have taken good care of my health.
Pamphilippvs:Sustentatumst sedulo.
GELASIMUS:I’ troth, I’m glad of it. I’ faith, I confoundedly wish I had now a thousand measures of silver.
Gelasimvs:Edepol gaudeo.edepol ne ego nunc mihi medimnum mille esse argenti velim.
EPIGNOMUS:What need have you of it?
Epignomvs:Quid eo tibi opust?
GELASIMUS:I’ faith, that I might invite him to dinner, and not invite you.
Gelasimvs:Hunc hercle ad cenam ut vocem, te non vocem.
EPIGNOMUS:You are talking against your own interest.
Epignomvs:Advorsum te fabulare.
GELASIMUS:This, then, that I might invite you both… for my part … I should not avoid … there is nothing so … as this …
Gelasimvs:Illud quidem, ambos ut vocem;et equidem simitu hau maligne vos invitassem domumad me, sed mihi ipsi domi meae nihil est. atque hoc scitis vos.
EPIGNOMUS:Troth, now, I’d ask you with pleasure, if there were room left.
Epignomvs:Edepol te vocem lubenter, si superfiat locus.
GELASIMUS:Well, standing, then, I’ll gobble down a bit in the scramble.
Gelasimvs:Quin tum stans obstrusero aliquid strenue.
EPIGNOMUS:No, only this one thing can be done.
Epignomvs:Immo unum hoc potest.
GELASIMUS:What?
Gelasimvs:Quid?
EPIGNOMUS:When the guests have gone, that then you may come—
Epignomvs:Vbi convivae abierint, tum venias.
GELASIMUS:Hurra! capital!
Gelasimvs:Vae aetati tuae.
EPIGNOMUS:To wash the pots, I mean; not to dinner.
Epignomvs:Vasa lautum, non ad cenam dico.
GELASIMUS:The Gods confound you! What say you, Pamphilus?
Gelasimvs:Di te perduint.quid ais, Pamphilippe?
PAMPHILUS:I’ troth, this day I’m engaged to dine elsewhere abroad.
Pamphilippvs:Ad cenam hercle alio promisi foras.
GELASIMUS:How, abroad?
Gelasimvs:Quid, foras?
PAMPHILUS:Really abroad, on my word.
Pamphilippvs:Foras hércle vero.
GELASIMUS:How the plague do you like, thus wearied, to be supping abroad?
Gelasimvs:Qui malum tíbi lasso libetforis cenare?
PAMPHILUS:Which do you advise me?
Pamphilippvs:Vtrum tu censes?
GELASIMUS:Order a dinner to be cooked at home, and word to be sent to him who invited you.
Gelasimvs:Iuben domi cenam coquiatque ad illúm renuntiari?
PAMPHILUS:Shall I dine at home, alone?
Pamphilippvs:Solus cenabo domi?
GELASIMUS:Why, not alone; invite me.
Gelasimvs:Non enim sólus: me vocato.
PAMPHILUS:But I’m afraid lest he should scold me, who has been to this expense for my sake.
Pamphilippvs:At ille ne suscenseat,mea qui causa sumptum fecit.
GELASIMUS:It may easily be excused—only listen to me; do order a dinner to be cooked at home.
Gelasimvs:Facile excusari potest.mihi modo ausculta, iube cénam domi coqui.
EPIGNOMUS:Not by my advice, indeed, will he act so as to disappoint that person this day.
Epignomvs:Non me quidemfaciet auctore, hodie ut illum decipiat.
GELASIMUS:Will you not be off from here? Perhaps you suppose that I don’t see what you’re about. Do you look to yourself, please.(To PAMPHILUS.) How that fellow is gaping after your property just like a hungry wolf. Don’t you know how men are set upon here in the street at night?
Gelasimvs:Non tu hinc abis?nisi me non perspicere censes quid agas. cave sis tu tibi,nam illic homó tuam hereditatem inhiát, quasi esuriens lupus.non tu scis, quam éfflictentur homines noctu hic in via?
PAMPHILUS:So many the more servants will I bid to come and fetch me, that they may protect me.
Pamphilippvs:Tanto pluris qui defendant ire advorsum iussero.
EPIGNOMUS:He won’t stir—he won’t stir; because you persuade him so earnestly not to go out.
Epignomvs:Non it, non it, quia tanto opere suades ne ebitat.
GELASIMUS:Do order a dinner to be cooked at home with all speed for me and for yourself and your wife.Troth, if you do so, I don’t think you’ll say that you are deceived.
Gelasimvs:Iubedomi mi tibique tuaeque uxori celeriter cenam coqui.si hercle faxis, non opinor dices deceptum fore.
PAMPHILUS:So far as that dinner is concerned, Gelasimus, you may be dinnerless to-day.
Pamphilippvs:Per hanc tibi cenam incenato, Gelasime, esse hodie licet.
GELASIMUS:Are you going abroad to dine?
Gelasimvs:Ibisne ad cenam foras?
PAMPHILUS:I’m going to dine at my brother’s, hard by.
Pamphilippvs:Apud frátrem ceno in proxumo.
GELASIMUS:Is that fixed?
Gelasimvs:Certumnest?
PAMPHILUS:Fixed.
Pamphilippvs:Certum.
GELASIMUS:By my troth, I hope you may be struck with a stone this day.
Gelasimvs:Edepol te hodie lapide percussum velim.
PAMPHILUS:I’m not afraid; I shall go through the garden; I’ll not go abroad.
Pamphilippvs:Non metuo: per hortúm transibo, non prodibo in publicum.
EPIGNOMUS:What say you to that, Gelasimus?
Epignomvs:Quid ais, Gelasime?
GELASIMUS:You’re entertaining your deputies; keep them to yourself.
Gelasimvs:Oratores tu accipis, habeas tibi.
EPIGNOMUS:Why, faith,’tis your own business.
Epignomvs:Tua pol refert.
GELASIMUS:If, indeed,’tis my own business, avail yourself of my assistance; invite me.
Gelasimvs:Enim, si quidem meá refert, opera utere.
EPIGNOMUS:By my faith, I see, as I fancy, one place still for yourself only, where you may recline.
Epignomvs:Posse edepol tibi opinor etiam uni locum condi …ubi accubes.
PAMPHILUS:Really, I do think it may be managed.
Pamphilippvs:Sane faciundum censeo.
GELASIMUS:O light of the city!
Gelasimvs:O lux oppidi.
EPIGNOMUS:If you can manage to recline in a small compass.
Epignomvs:Si arte poteris accubare.
GELASIMUS:Aye, even between two wedges of iron.As little space as a puppy can lie in, the same will be enough for me.
Gelasimvs:Vél inter cuneos ferreos;tantillum loculi, ubi catellus cubet, id mi satis est loci.
EPIGNOMUS:I’ll beg for it some way or other; come along.(Pulls him along.)
Epignomvs:Exorabo aliquo modo. veni.
GELASIMUS:What? This way?
Gelasimvs:Hucine?
EPIGNOMUS:Yes, to prison. For here, indeed, you’ll not find any further entertainment. Let’s be off, you Pamphilus.
Epignomvs:Immo in carcerem;nam hic quidem genium meliorem tuom non facies. eamus, tu.
PAMPHILUS:I’ll but salute the Gods: then I’ll pass through to your house forthwith.
Pamphilippvs:Deos salutabo modo, poste ad te continuo transeo.—
GELASIMUS:What then?
Gelasimvs:Quid igitur?
EPIGNOMUS:Why, I said that you might go to prison.
Epignomvs:Dixi equidem, in carcerem ires.
GELASIMUS:Well, if you order it,I’ll go there even.
Gelasimvs:Quin si iusseris,eo quoque ibo.
EPIGNOMUS:Immortal Gods! really, by my troth, this fellow might be induced by a dinner or a breakfast to bear extreme torture.
Epignomvs:Di immortales, hic quidem pól summam in crucemcena aut prandio perduci potest.
GELASIMUS:Such is my nature; with anything can I struggle much more easily than with hunger.
Gelasimvs:Ita ingenium meumst:quicumvis depugno multo facilius quam cum fame.
EPIGNOMUS:I know it: at my housefull long enough has this facility of yours been experienced by me …while you were the Parasite of myself and my brother, we ruined our fortunes.Now I don’t wish you to be made by me from a Gelasimus into a Catagelasimus.(EPIGNOMUS and PAMPHILUS go into their houses.)
Epignomvs:Dum parasitus mi atque fratri fuisti, rem confregimus.
GELASIMUS:And are you gone now? Surely he is gone. Now have I need of a wise resolution. Both are gone; consider, Gelasimus, what plan you must adopt. … What, I? Yes, you. What, for myself? Yes, for yourself. Don’t you see how dear provisions are? Don’t you see how the kindness and the heartiness of men have vanished? Don’t you see how drolls are set at nought, and how they themselves are sponged upon?By my troth, not a person shall ever behold me alive on the morrow; for, this instant, in-doors will I load my throat with a bulrush dose. And by this I shall not give cause for men to say that I died of hunger.(Exit.)
Gelasimvs:Non nego ista ápud te.Epignomvs:Satis spectatast mihi iam tua felicitas;nunc ego nolo ex Gelasimo mihi fieri te Catagelasimum.—Gelasimvs:Iamne abiisti? Gelasime, vide quíd es capturus consili.egone? tune. mihine? tibine. viden ut annonast gravis?viden, benignitates hominum ut periere et prothymiae?viden ridiculos nihili fieri, atque ipsos parasitarier?numquam edepol me vivom quisquam in crastinum inspiciet diem;nam mihi iam intus potione iuncea onerabo gulam,neque ego hoc committam, ut me esse homines mortuom dicant fame.—
(Enter STICHUS, and provisions, a table, and couches on the stage.)STICHUS:Foolishly and unwisely is it done in my opinion, if people are in the habit, if they are expecting a person; of looking out for him; faith, ne doesn’t on that account come a bit the faster. I’m now doing that same thing, in looking out for Sagarinus;who, still, for that reason won’t come a jot the faster. Troth, I shall just now be taking my place alone, if he doesn’t come here. I’ll now fetch that cask of wine hither from home, and then I’ll take my place. The day, like snow, is melting away apace.(Goes into the house of EPIGNOMUS.) (Enter SAGARINUS.)SAGARINUS:Hail! Athens, thou nurse of Greece;country of my master, hail! How joyously do I behold thee. But I have a wish to see how my mistress and fellow-servant, Stephanium, is faring. For I bade Stichus to give her my regards, and to tell her that I should come to-day, so that she might cook a dinner in good time.But, surely, here’s Stichus.(with a cask of wine)STICHUS: (to himself.)A clever thing you did, master, when you presented your servant, Stichus, with this gift. O ye immortal Gods! how many delights do I carry, how many smiles, how many jokes, how many a kiss, dancing, dalliance, and good-fellowship.SAGARINUS:Stichus,how fare you?STICHUS:Right well, Sagarinus, most delightfully; I’m bringing Dionysus, as my guest and yours. For, i’ faith, the dinner’s cooked; free range has been given me and you at your house. For at our house there’s an entertainment; your master’s dining there with his wife, and Antipho as well;there, too, is my master. This was given me as a present.(Points to the cask.)SAGARINUS:How? Are you dreaming?STICHUS:I’ faith, I’m telling you the truth.SAGARINUS:Who then gave you this?STICHUS:What matters that to you?I wish us this day to wash away everything of foreign climes.Leave them alone; let’s now attend to Athens; follow me.Do you at once make haste, and bathe.SAGARINUS:I have bathed.STICHUS:Very good follow me, then, this. way in-doors, Sagarinus.SAGARINUS:Of course, I follow. By my troth, this beginning pleases me as I return home; a happy omen and augury has met me in my path.(They go into the house of PAMPHILUS.) (Enter STEPHANIUM from the house of EPIGNOMUS.)STEPHANIUM: (to the AUDIENCE.)I wish that it may appear wondrous to no one of you, Spectators,why I who live there (pointing to the house of PAMPHILUS) am come out hither from this other house: I’ll inform you thereon. Just now was I sent for to this house by the back way. For as soon as news was brought that the husbands of these ladies were about to come, we all hurried thither. We attended to laying the couches, and setting all in order. Still, amid these duties, I had a care for my friends,Stichus and my fellow-servant Sagarinus, that their dinner should be cooked. Stichus has been caterer; but for cooking it, I’ve appointed one my deputy. Now, I’ll be off hence, and attend to my friends, who, I see, are coming here.(Goes into the house of PAMPHILUS.) (Enter STICHUS and SAGARINUS from the house of PAMPHILUS with provisions, a PIPER following.)SAGARINUS:Come, out of doors with you; lead on the procession. Stichus, I appoint you commander of the cask. I’m resolved to prove our banquet in every fashion this day.So may the Gods love me, we are well entertained in being feasted in this place. I will that each person that passes by shall be invited to join the banquet.STICHUS:Agreed, so long only as, i’ faith, each man comes with his own wine; for of this, a mouthful shall be given to no person but ourselves, this day. Eating alone, let’s wait upon ourselves.SAGARINUS:This banquet,for our means, is quite sufficient, with its nuts, beans, figs, a dish of olives, pounded lupines, and a cake.STICHUS:It better becomes a man who is a slave to bring his expenses within moderation than beyond. Each one to his own station; they, who have wealth at home, drink from cups, goblets, and bowls; we, if we are nowdrinking from our Samian jug, still build our walls according to our means.SAGARINUS:But while she who is your mistress and mine is arranging her hair, and bedecking herself, I wish us to have some diversion among ourselves. I appoint you the commander of this feast.STICHUS:Very aptly does it suggest itself to your mind.SAGARINUS:Wouldn’t we be more suitably entertained like Cynics on benches here, than upon couches?STICHUS:Aye, but this is far the most pleasant.SAGARINUS:On which side is each of us to recline by our mistress?STICHUS:Of course you go to the upper place. And, so that you may understand it, I make a division with you on these terms: consider, and take which province you would even like now to take.(They take their places.)SAGARINUS:But what’s your meaning about this “province?”STICHUS:Whether you would choose to hold the command over the water or over Bacchus.SAGARINUS:Over Bacchus, most distinctly.But, in the meantime, general of ours, why stands this goblet here? See how many cups we have drunk.STICHUS:As many as there are fingers on your hand. The Greek song is, “Drink either your five cups or your three, but not your four.”SAGARINUS: (about to drink.)I pledge you. Do you take for yourself the tenth part from the fountain, if you are wise. Here’s luck to you, luck to us; here’s luck to thee, luck to me; luck to our Stephanium as well.STICHUS:’Tis bravely done. I pledge you in a goblet.(Drinks.)SAGARINUS:Keep your wine; I’d very much like something by way of a relish.STICHUS:If you are not satisfied with what’s here, there’s nothing else. Take some water.SAGARINUS:You say right; I care for no dainties.Drink away, Piper; drink, if you do drink. I’ faith, this must be drunk—don’t shirk it. (Holds the goblet to the PIPER.) Why flinch at what you see must be done by you? Why don’t you drink? Do it, if you are to do it. Take it, I tell you, for the public pays for this. That’s not your way to shirk your drink. Take your pipes out of your mouth.(The PIPER drinks.)STICHUS:When he has drunk, either do you mind my rules, or else I’ll give up.I don’t wish us to drink this straight out; we shall soon be about nothing; for, by my faith, almost all in a moment, the cask might be turned head downwards.SAGARINUS: (to the PIPER.)How now? Although you did make a fuss about it, still it didn’t hurt you. Come, Piper, when you’ve done drinking, put back your pipes to your lips; quickly puff out your cheeks, just like a reptile serpent.Come now, Stichus, whichever of the two breaks order, shall be fined a cup.STICHUS:You propose a good regulation. You ought to have your way, who only ask what’s fair.SAGARINUS:Mind it then; if you offend, I’ll forthwith take the forfeit on the spot.STICHUS:You ask what’s quite right and just.SAGARINUS: (pledging STICHUS.)Here’s to you first of all.STICHUS:’Tis a droll thing this, for two persons, rivals of each other, to be courting,to be drinking from one goblet, and to be kissing one wench.’Tis worthy of remark this: I am you, you are I; of one accord are we. With one mistress are we both in love; when she’s with me, still she’s with you; and when she’s with you, she’s with me as well; neither of us envies the other.SAGARINUS:Come, come, there’s enough of it; I don’t want it overdone to weariness. I’d now like some other sport.STICHUS:Drink on, if you are drinking.SAGARINUS:There shall be no skulking in me.But, troth, I’ve had enough of the feast; would but our mistress come here. If she were here, nothing else would be away.STICHUS:Should you like us to invite our mistress out? She shall give us a dance.SAGARINUS:I agree.STICHUS: (calling aloud.)My sweet one, my lovely one, my pleasing one, Stephanium, do come out of doors to your sweethearts; to me you are quite charming.SAGARINUS:But to me, indeed, most charming.STICHUS:Make us jovial fellows more jovial by your assistance and your company.Returning from abroad, we want you, dear little Stephanium, my honey, that is, if our lovingness is pleasing to you, if we are acceptable to you.
Stichvs:More hoc fit, atque stulte mea sententia:si quem hominem exspectant, eum solent provisere;qui hercle illa causa ócius nihilo venit.idem ego nunc facio, qui proviso Sagarinum,qui nihilo citius veniet tamen hac gratia.iam hercle ego decumbam solus, si ille huc non venit.cadum modo hinc a me huc cum vino transferam,postidea accumbam. quasi nix tabescit dies.—Sangarinvs:Salvete, Athenae, quae nutrices Graeciae,sperata erilis patria, te video libens.sed amica mea et conserva quid agat Stephaniumcuraest, ut valeat. nam Sticho mandaveram,salutem ut nuntiaret atque ei ut diceretme hodie venturum, ut cenam coqueret temperi.sed Stichus est hic quidem.Stichvs:Fecisti, ere, facetias,quom hoc donavisti dono tuom servom Stichum.pro di immortales, quot ego voluptates fero,quot risiones, quot iocos, quot savia,saltationes, blanditias, prothymias.Sangarinvs:Stiche.Stichvs:Hem.Sangarinvs:Quíd fit?Stichvs:Euge, Sangarine lepidissume.fero convivam Dionysum mihique et tibi.namque edepol cena cocta est, locus liber datustmihi et tibi apud vos (nam apud nos est convivium,ibi voster cenat cum uxore adeo et Antipho,ibidem erus est noster), hoc mihi dono datumst.Sangarinvs:Quis somniavit aurum?Stichvs:Quid id ad te attinet?proin tu lavare propera.Sangarinvs:Lautus sum.Stichvs:Optime,[sequere ergo hác me íntro.]Sangarinvs:[Ego vero sequor.]Stichvs:volo eluamus hodie, peregrina omniarelinque, Athenas nunc colamus. sequere me.—Sangarinvs:Sequor, et domum redeunti principium placet.bona scaeva strenaque obviam occessit mihi.—Stephanivm:Mirúm videri némini vestrúm volo, spectatóres,quid ego hinc, quae illic habito, exeam: faciam vos certiores.domo dúdum huc arcessita sum, ⟨nam⟩ quoniam nuntiatum estistarum venturos viros, ibi festinamus omnes;lectis sternendis studuimus munditiisque apparandis.intér illud tamen negotium meis curavi amicis,Sticho et conservo Sagarino meo, cena cocta ut esset.Stichus obsonatust, ceterum ego operam do: is adlegavit.nunc ibo hinc et amicos meos curabo hic advenientes.—Sangarinvs:Ágite ite foras: férte pompam. cádo te praefició, Stiche.omnibus módis temptare certumst nostrum hodie convivium.ita me di ament, lepide accipimur quom hoc recipimur in loco.quisquis praetéreat, comissatum volo vocari.Stichvs:Convenit,dum quidem hercle quisque veniat, ⟨veniat⟩ cum vino suo.nam hinc quidem hodie polluctura praeter nos dabitur nemini. †nosmet inter nos ministrémus monotropi.Sangarinvs:Hoc conviviumstpro opibus nostris satis commodule nucibus, fabulis, ficulis,oleae † interiplio, lupillo, comminuto crustulo.Stichvs:Sat est: servo homini módeste melius facere sumptum quam ampliter.suom quemque decet: quibus divitiae domi sunt, scaphiis cantharisbatiocis bibunt, át nos nostro Samiolo poterio:tamen bibimús nos, tamen efficimus pro opibus nostra moenia.Sangarinvs:Age dice uter utrubi áccumbamus.Stichvs:Abi tu sane superior.atque adeo, ut tu scire possis, pacto ego hoc técum divido:vide, utram tibi libet etiam nunc capere, cape provinciam.Sangarinvs:Quid istuc est provinciai?Stichvs:Vtrum Fontine an Liberoimperium te inhibere mavis?Sangarinvs:Nimio liquido Libero.sed amica mea et tua dum cenat dumque se exórnat, nos volotamen ludere inter nós. strategum te facio huic convivio.Stichvs:Nimium lepide in mentem venit: potius quam in subselliocynice hic accipimur quam in lectis.Sangarinvs:Immo enim nímio hic dulcius.sed interim, stratege noster, cur hic cessat cantharus?vide, quot cyathos bibimus.Stichvs:Tot quot digiti tibi sunt in manu.cantio Graecast: ἢ πέντ' ἢ τρία πῖν' ἢ μὴ τέτταρα.Sangarinvs:Tibi propino. decumam a fonte tibi tute inde, si sapis.bene vos, bene nos, bene te, bene me, bene nostram etiam Stephanium.Stichvs:[Bibe si bibis.]Sangarinvs:[Non mora erit apud me.]Stichvs:[Edepol convivi sat est,][modo nostra huc amica accedat: id abest, aliud nil abest.]Stichvs:Lepide hoc actum est. tibi propino cantharum. vinum tu habes.Sangarinvs:Nimis vellem aliquid pulpamenti.Stichvs:Si horum, quae adsunt, paenitet,nihil est. tene aquam.Sangarinvs:Melius dicis; nil moror cuppedia.bibe, tibicen. age si quid agis, bíbendum hercle hoc est, ne nega.quid hic fastidis quod faciundum vides esse tibi? quin bibis?[age si quid agis] accipe inquam. non hoc ⟨tuo fit sumptu⟩: inpendet publicum.haud tuom istúc est te vereri. éripe ex ore tibias.Stichvs:Vbi illic biberit, vel servato meum modum vel tu dabo. †nolo ego nos † prosumo bibere. nulli rei erimus postea;namque edepol quam vis desubito vel cadus verti potest.Sangarinvs:Quid igitur? quamquam gravatus fuisti, non nocuit tamen.age, tibicen, quando bíbisti, refer ad labeas tibias,suffla celeriter tibi buccas quasi proserpens bestia,agedum. Stiche, uter démutassit, poculo multabitur.Stichvs:Bonum ius dicis. impetrare oportet qui aequom postulat.Sangarinvs:Age ergo observa. si pecassis, multam hic retinebo ilico.Stichvs:Optimum atque aequissimum oras. em tibi hoc primum omnium:haec facetiast, amare inter se rivalis duos,uno cantharo potare, únum scortum ducere.hoc memorabilest: ego tu sum, tu es ego, unianimi sumus,unam amicam amamus ambo, mecum ubi est, tecum est tamen;tecum ubi autem est, mecum ibi autemst: neuter neutri ínvidet.Sangarinvs:Ohe, iam satis, nolo obtaedescat; alium ludum nunc volo.Stichvs:Vin amicam huc evocemus? ea saltabit.Sangarinvs:Censeo.Stichvs:Mea suavis, amabilis, amoena Stephanium, ad amores tuosforas egredere, satis mihi pulchra és.Sangarinvs:At enim pulcherrima.Stichvs:Fac nos hilaros hilariores opera atque adventu tuo.Sangarinvs:Peregre advenientes te expetimus, Stephaniscidium, mel meum,sí amabilitas tibi nostrá placet, si tibi ambo áccepti sumus.
(Enter STEPHANIUM, from the house of PAMPHILUS.)STEPHANIUM:I’ll indulge you, my dears; but, so may pretty Venus favour me, I should have already come out of doors here together with you, had I not been sprucing myself up for you. For such is the way of woman,when she is well washed, made clean, dressed and tricked out, still is she incomplete; and a female who is a courtesan much more quickly acquires dislike for herself by sluttishness than always keeps in favour through neatness.STICHUS:That’s very cleverly said.SAGARINUS:’Tis the genuine language of Venus.STICHUS:Sagarinus.SAGARINUS:What’s the matter?STICHUS:I’m in pain all over.SAGARINUS:All over? So much the more unfortunate you.STEPHANIUM:Where do I take my place?SAGARINUS:Wherever you please.STEPHANIUM:I’d like with both of you, for I love you both.STICHUS:Whack go my savings. I’m done for;freedom has abandoned this person of mine.STEPHANIUM:Prithee, do give me room, where I may take my place, if, indeed, I am agreable. (She takes her place.)Now I do long to be cozy with you both.STICHUS:I’m ruined utterly. What were you saying?SAGARINUS:Heyday! What’s the matter?STICHUS:So may the Gods favour me, it never shall be otherwise this day but that this girl shall have a dance somehow. Come, my love, my sweet, do dance; I’ll dance too.(They rise and dance.)SAGARINUS:I’ faith, you shan’t that way get the better of me, but what I’ll have a bit of enjoyment, too, that way.STEPHANIUM:Well, if I must dance, do you then give the Piper something to drink.STICHUS:Aye, and to me.SAGARINUS: (holds the goblet to the PIPER.)Piper, you take first: and after that, if you tipple this off, just as has been your wont before to-day, straightwaystrike up some merry and amorous tune to dance to, by which we may tingle all over from our very finger nails. Pour some water here.(The PIPER stops playing while he drinks the water.)SAGARINUS:Take this, you; toss it off. The drink didn’t please him just now; now at last he takes it with less difficulty. Take it, you. (To STEPHANIUM.) In the meantime, apple of my eye, give me a kiss while he’s drinking.STEPHANIUM:Why, it’s the way of a common strumpet, for a damsel to give a kiss standing to her sweetheart as he stands.(She turns away, while he tries to kiss her.)STICHUS:Bravo! bravo! that’s the way it’s given to a thief.SAGARINUS:Come, blow out your cheeks now; something in the amorous way at once. Give us a new tune in return for the old wine.SAGARINUS:What person in the Ionian or the ballet line is there that can do anything like that?(He capers about.)STICHUS:If you get the better of me this turn, just challenge me to another.SAGARINUS:Just you do it in this fashion.(Capers.)STICHUS:And you in this fashion.(Capers too.)SAGARINUS:O grand!STICHUS:O fine!SAGARINUS:O wonderful!STICHUS:Quiet!SAGARINUS:Now, then, both in the same step. (They dance quietly, in the same measure.) I challenge all the dancing-masters to dance against me.’Tis no more possible for there to be enough of this for us than for there to be too much rain for a mushroom.STICHUS: (ceasing to dance)Let’s away hence in-doors at once now; we’ve danced long enough for the wine.You, Spectators, give us your applause, and then go home to enjoy yourselves.
Stephanivm:Mórem vobis geram, meaé deliciae. nam íta me Venus amoéna amet,ut ego huc iam dudum simitu exissem vobiscum foras,nisi me vobis exornarem. nam ita est ingenium muliebre:bene cum lauta est, tersa ornata ficta est, infecta est tamen;nimioque sibi mulier meretrix repperit odium ociussua inmunditia, quam in perpetuom ut placeat munditia sua.Stichvs:Nimium lepide fabulata est.Sangarinvs:Veneris mera est oratio,Stichvs:Sangarine.Sangarinvs:Quid est?Stichvs:Totus doleo.Sangarinvs:Totus? tanto miserior.Stephanivm:Vtrubi accumbo?Sangarinvs:Vtrubí tu vis?Stephanivm:Cum ambobus volo, nam ambos amo.Stichvs:Vapulat peculium, actum est.Sangarinvs:Fugit hoc libertas caput.Stephanivm:Date mihi lócum, ubi accumbam, amabo, siquidem placeo.Stichvs:Tun mihi?Stephanivm:Cupio cúm utroque.Stichvs:Ei mihi, bene ⟨ego⟩ dispereo. quid ais?Sangarinvs:Quid est?Stichvs:Ita me di ament, numquam enim fíet hodie, haec quin saltet tamen.age, mulsa mea suavitudo, salta: saltabo ego simul.Sangarinvs:Numquam edepol med istoc vinces, quin ego ibidem pruriam.Stephanivm:Siquidem mihi saltandum est, tum vos date bibat tibicini.Stichvs:Et quidem nóbis.Sangarinvs:Tene, tibicen, primum; postidea locisi hoc eduxeris, proinde ut consuetu's consuetus es antehac, celeriterlepidam et suavem cantionem aliquam occupito cinaedicam,ubi perpruriscamus usque ex unguiculis. inde huc aquam.Sangarinvs:tene tu hóc, educe. dudum placuit potio:nunc minus gravate iam accipit. tene tu. interim,meus oculus, da mihi savium, dum illic bibit.Stichvs:Prostibilest tandem? stantem stanti saviumdare amicum amicae? euge euge, sic furi datur.Sangarinvs:Age, iam infla buccas, nunciam aliquid suaviter.redde cántionem veteri pro vino novam.Sangarinvs:qui Iónicus aut cinaédicust, qui hoc tále facere póssiet?Stichvs:Si istóc me vorsu víceris, alió me provocáto:Sangarinvs:Fac tu hóc modo.Stichvs:At tu hoc módo.Sangarinvs:Babae.Stichvs:Tataé.Sangarinvs:Papae.Stichvs:Pax.Sangarinvs:Nunc páriter ambo. omnís voco cinaédos contra.satis ésse nobis nón magis potis quám fungo imber.Stichvs:Intro hínc abeamus nunciam: saltátum satis pro vinost.vos, spectatores, plaudite atque ite ad vos comissatum.