When, therefore, the day was coming towards its term, so that my harness should be taken oft' and that I should rest myself in peace, I was not so joyful of my liberty, as that the veil being taken from mine eyes, I should see all the abomination of this mischievous quean. When night was come and the sun gone down beneath the sea to lighten the under part of the earth, behold the old bawd and the young lover at her side came to the door; and he seemed to me but a boy, by reason that his cheeks were yet smooth and bright, and very pleasant: then the baker's wife kissed him a thousand times, and receiving him courteously, placed him down at the table. But he had scarce taken any first draught nor eaten the first morsel, when the good man (contrary to his wife's expectation) returned home, for she thought he would not have come so soon; but, Lord, how she cursed him, good woman, praying God that he might break his legs at the first entry in. In the mean season she caught her lover, that was now very pale and trembling, and thrust him into the bin that lay near by some chance, where she accustomed to sift her flour, and dissembling her wickedness by her wonted craft, put on a firm countenance and asked of her husband why he came home so soon, and left the supper of his clear friend so early.
‘Contubernalis mei fullonis uxor, alioquin servati pudoris, ut videbatur, femina, quae semper secundo rumore gloriosa Larem mariti pudice gubernabat, occulta libidine prorumpit in adulterum quempiam: cumque furtivos amplexus obiret assidue, ipso illo denique momento, quo nos lauti cenam petebamus, cum eodem illo iuvene miscebatur in Venerem. Ergo nostra repente turbata praesentia, subitario ducta consilio, eundem illum subiectum contegit viminea cavea, quae fustium flexu tereti in rectum aggerata cumulum lacinias circumdatas suffusa candido fumo sulphuris inalbabat, eoque iam, ut sibi videbatur, tutissime celata mensam nobiscum secura participat. Interdum acerrimo gravique odore sulphuris iuvenis inescatus atque obnubilatus intercluso spiritu diffluebat, utque est ingenium vivacis me falli, crebras ei sternutationes commovebat.’
“I could not abide,” quoth he, deeply sighing, “To see so great a mischief and wicked fact which my neighbour's wife committed, but I must run away. Oh, how good and trusty a matron she seemed, but what a harlot is she become, and how she hath dishonoured her husband! I swear by this goddess Ceres that if I had not seen it with mine eyes I would never have believed it.” His wife, made desirous by his words to know the matter, desired him to tell what she had done; and she ceased not to urge him until he accorded to the request of his wife, and ignorant of the state of his own house, declared the mischance of another. “You shall understand,” said he, “That the wife of the fuller my companion, who seemed to be a wise and chaste woman, regarding her own honesty and the profit of her house, had begun secretly to love a knave, and did often meet him: and this very night, as we came back to supper from the baths, he. and she were together. Then she was troubled by our sudden presence and thrust him into a mew made with twigs, built up high with rods woven in and out, and appointed to lay on clothes to make them white with the smoke and fume of brimstone: and so he being very safe hidden therein (as she thought) she sat with us at the table to colour the matter. In the mean season the young man, covered in the mew, could not forbear oft sneezing, by reason of the sharp smoke, for he was wholly surrounded and choked with the heavy fumes of this lively sublimate. The good man, thinking it had been his wife that sneezed (for the noise thereof came from behind her back) cried, as they are wont to say, ' Christ help '; but when he sneezed more and more, he suspected the matter, and willing to know who it was, rose, pushing back the table, and went to the mew, where he found the young man now choked well nigh dead with smoke. When he understood the whole matter he was so inflamed with anger at this outrage that he called for a sword to kill him: and undoubtedly he had so done, had not I hardly restrained his violent hands from his purpose, that had brought danger unto us all, assuring him that his enemy would die with the force of the brimstone without any harm which he might get from it: howbeit, my words would not appease his fury, but as necessity required he took the young man well nigh choked, and carried him out at the doors to the nearest lane. In the mean season I counselled his wife and did persuade her to leave his shop and absent herself at some neighbour's house till the choler of her husband was pacified, lest he should be moved against her, and do her some harm and to himself also. And so being weary of their supper, I forthwith returned home.” When the baker had told this tale, his impudent and rash wife began to curse and abhor the wife of the fuller, calling her whore and shameless, and a great shame to all the sex of women, in that she had lost all modesty, broken the bond of her husband's bed, turned his house into a bawdy-house, and had lost the dignity of a spouse to become an harlot;
‘Atque ut primum e regione mulieris pone tergum eius maritus acceperat sonum sternutationis—quod enim putaret ab ea profectum—solito sermone salutem ei fuerat imprecatus, et iterato rursum et frequentate saepius, donec rei nimietate commotus quod res erat tandem suspicatus et impulsa mensa protenus remotaque cavea producit hominem crebros anhelitus aegre reflantem; inflammatusque indignatione contumeliae gladium flagitans iugulare moriturum gestiebat, ni respecto communi periculo vix eum ab impetu furioso cohibuissem, asseverans brevi absque noxa nostri suapte inimicum eius violentia sulphuris periturum: nec suadela mea sed ipsius rei necessitate lenitus, quippe iam semivivum illum in proxumum deportat angiportum. Tum uxorem eius tacite suasi ac denique persuasi secederet paululum atque ultra limen tabernae ad quampiam tantisper familiarem sibi mulierem migraret, claudus, cui nostra tutela permissa fuerat, universa nos iumenta, id hora iam postulante, ad lacum proxumum bibendi causa gregatim prominabat. Quae res optatissimam mihi vindictae subministravit occasionem: namque praetergrediens observatos extremus adulteri digitos, qui per angustias cavi tegminis prominebant, obliquata atque infesta ungula compressos usque ad summam minutiem confero, donec intolerabili dolore commotus, sublato flebili clamore, repulsoque et abiecto alveo, conspectui profano redditus scaenam propudiosae mulieris patefecit. Nec tamen pistor damno pudicitiae magnopere commotus exsangui pallore trepidantem puerum serena fronte et propitiata facie commulcens incipit: “Nihil triste de me tibi, fili, metuas. Non sum barbarus nec agresti morum squalore praeditus, nec ad exemplum naccinae truculentiae sulphuris te letali fumo necabo, ac ne iuris quidem severitate lege de adulteriis ad discrimen vocabo capitis tam venustum tamque pulchellum puellum, sed plane cum uxore mea partiario tractabo; nec herciscundae familiae sed communi dividundo formula dimicabo, ut sine ulla controversia vel dissensione tribus nobis in uno conveniat lectulo. Nam et ipse semper cum mea coniuge tam concorditer vixi, ut ex secta prudentium eadem nobis ambobus placerent. Sed nec aequitas ipsa patitur habere plus auctoritatis uxorem quam maritum.”
and said that such women were worthy to be burned alive. But knowing her own guilty conscience and proper whoredom, that she might the sooner save her lover from hurt lying in the bin, she willed her husband now early to go to bed, but he, having lost his supper and eaten nothing, said gently that he would sup before he went to rest: wherefore she was compelled, though very unwilling, to set I such things on the table as she had prepared for her lover. But I was much troubled in heart, as considering the past great mischief of this wicked quean and her present obstinacy and impudence, and devised with myself how I might help my master by revealing the matter, and by kicking away the cover of the bin (where like a snail the young man was couched) make her whoredom apparent and known. As I was tormented by the insult put upon my master, at length I was aided by the providence of God, for there was a lame old man to whom the custody of us was committed, that drove me, poor ass, and the other horses in a herd to the water to drink, and the time was then come;
Talis sermonis blanditie cavillatum deducebat ad torum nolentem puerum, sequentem tamen, et pudicissima illa uxore altrorsus disclusa solus ipse cum puero cubans gratissima corruptarum nuptiarum vindicta perfruebatur. Sed cum primum rota solis lucida diem peperit, vocatis duobus e familia validissimis, quam altissime sublato puero, ferula nates eius obvertit berans, “Tu autem,” inquit “Tam mollis ac teneri et admodum puer, defraudatis amatoribus aetatis tuae flore, mulieres appetis atque eas liberas et connubia lege sociata corrumpis et intempestivum tibi nomen adulteri vindicas?” His et pluribus verbis compellatum et insuper affatim plagis castigatum forinsecus abicit; at ille adulterarum omnium fortissimus insperata potitus salute, tamen nates candidas illas noctu diuque diruptus, maerens profugit: nec setius pistor ille nuntium remisit uxori eamque protinus de sua proturbavit domo.
then had I good occasion ministered to my revenge, for as I passed by I perceived the fingers of the young man in the narrow space under the side of the bin, and lifting up my heels I spurned the flesh thereof with the force of my hoofs, and crushed them small, where by the great pain thereof he was compelled to cry out, and to throw down the bin on the ground, and so the whoredom, of the baker's wife was known and revealed. The baker, seeing this, was little moved at the dishonesty of his wife, but he took the young man, pale and trembling for fear, by the hand, and with cold and courteous words spake in this sort: “Fear not any trouble from me, my son, nor think that I am so barbarous or cruel or rustical a person that I would stifle thee with the smoke of sulphur, as our neighbour the fuller accustometh, nor will I punish thee accord to the rigour of the Julian law, which commandeth that adulterers should be put to death. No, no, I will not execute any cruelty against so fair and comely a young man as you be, but we will divide our pleasure between us; I will not sue thee for a division of our inheritance, but we will be equal partners by the sharing all three of one bed. For never bath there been any debate nor dissension between foe and my wife, but both of us may be contented, for I have always lived with her in such tranquillity that according to the saying of the wise men, the one hath said, that the other holdeth for law;
At illa praeter genuinam nequitiam contumelia etiam, quamvis iusta, tamen altius commota atque exasperata ad armillum revertitur et ad familiares feminarum artes accenditur, magnaque cura requisitam veteratricem quandam feminam, quae devotionibus ac maleficiis quidvis efficere posse credebatur, multis exorat precibus multisque suffarcinat muneribus, alterum de duobus postulans, vel rursum mitigato conciliari marito, vel si id nequiverit, certe larva vel aliquo diro numine immisso violenter eius expugnari spiritum. Tunc saga illa et divini potens primis adhuc armis facinorosae disciplinae suae velitatur et vehementer offensum mariti flectere atque in amorem impellere conatur animum. Quae res cum ei sequius ac rata fuerat proveniret, indignata numinibus, et praeter praemii destinatum compendium contemptione etiam stimulata, ipsi iam miserrimi mariti incipit imminere capiti, umbramque violenter peremptae mulieris ad exitium eius instigare.
but indeed equity will not suffer but that the husband should bear more authority than the wife.” With these and like smooth and jesting words he led the young man to his chamber, and closed his wife in another chamber, whereby he might revenge his enemy at his pleasure. On the next morrow when the sun's rays did first usher in the day, he called two of the most sturdiest servants of his house, who hoist up the young man while he scourged his buttocks well-favouredly with rods like a child. When he had well beaten him he said: “Art thou not ashamed, thou that art so tender and delicate a boy, to refuse the lovers of thine own budding age, and to desire the violation of honest marriages, and defame thyself with wicked wiving, whereby thou hast gotten the name of an adulterer?” And so he whipped him again and chased him out of his house: the young man, the bravest of all adulterers, ran away, despairing of his life, and did nothing else, save only bewail his striped and aching buttocks. Soon after the baker sent one to his wife who divorced her away in his name: but she, beside tier own natural mischief (offended at this contumely, though she had worthily deserved the same) had recourse to wicked arts and trumpery 1 that women use, never ceasing till she had found out an enchantress, who (as it was thought) could do what she would with her sorcery and conjuration. The baker's wife began to entreat her, promising that she would largely recompense her, if she could bring one of these two things to pass, either to make that her husband might be reconciled to her again, or else, if he would not agree thereto, to send some ghost or devil into him to dispossess the spirit of her husband. Then the witch with her abominable science began at first to conjure with the lighter arts of her wicked practice, and to make her ceremonies to turn the offended heart of the baker to the love of his wife: but all was in vain;
Sed forsitan lector scrupulosus reprehendens narratum meum sic argumentaberis: “Unde autem tu astutule asine, intra terminos pistrini contectus quid secreto, ut affirmas, mulieres gesserint scire potuisti?” Accipe igitur quemadmodum homo curiosus iumenti faciem sustinens cuncta quae in perniciem pistoris mei gesta sunt cognovi. Diem ferme circa mediam repente intra pistrinum mulier reatu miraque tristitie deformis apparuit flebili centunculo semiamicta, nudis et intectis pedibus, lurore buxeo macieque foedata, et discerptae comae semicanae sordentes inspersu cineris pleramque eius anteventulae contegebant faciem. Haec talis manu pistori clementer iniecta, quasi quippiam secreto collocutura in suum sibi cubiculum deducit eum et adducta fore quam diutissime demoratur. Sed cum esset iam confectum omne frumentum, quod inter manus opifices tractaverant, necessarioque peti deberet aliud, servuli cubiculum propter adstantes dominum vocabant operique supplementum postulabant: atque ut illis saepicule et intervocaliter clamantibus nullus respondit dominus, iam forem pulsare validius et, quod diligentissime fuerat oppessulata, maius peiusque aliquid opinantes, nisu valido reducto vel diffracto cardine tandem patefaciunt aditum. Nec uspiam reperta illa muliere vident e quodam tigillo constrictum iamque exanimem pendere dominum; eumque nodo cervicis absolutum detractumque summis plangoribus; summisque lamentationibus atque ultimo lavacro procurant, peractisque feralibus officiis frequenti prosequente comitatu tradunt sepulturae.
wherefore angry with her gods, and considering on the one side that she could not bring her purpose to pass, and on the other side the loss of her gain and the little account that was made of her science, she began to aim against the life of the baker, threatening to send an ill spirit of a certain woman that had died violently to kill him by mean of her conjurations. But peradventure some scrupulous reader may demand me a question, how I, being an ass, and tied always within the walls of the mill-house, could be so clever as to know the secrets of these women: learn then, I answer, notwithstanding my shape of an ass, yet having the sense and knowledge of a man, how I did curiously find out and know out such injuries as were done to my master. About noon there came suddenly a woman into the mill-house, very sorrowful, clothed in wretched rags, and in gloomy garb like those that are accused of a crime, half naked and with bare and unshod feet, meagre, exceeding pale and thin, ill-favoured, and her hair, which was growing towards white, mixed with cinders.and scattering upon her face. This woman gently took the baker by the hand, and feigning that she had some secret matter to tell him, led him into his chamber, where they remained a good space with closed doors.
Die sequenti filia eius accurrit e proxumo castello, in quod pridem denupserat, maesta atque crines pendulos quatiens et interdum pugnis obtundens ubera; quae nullo quidem domus infortunium nuntiante cuncta cognorat, sed ei per quietem obtulit sese flebilis patris sui facies, adhuc nodo revincta cervice, eique totum novercae scelus aperuit, de adulterio, de maleficio, et quemadmodum larvatus ad inferos demeasset. Ea cum se diutino plangore cruciasset, concursu familiarium cohibita tandem pausam luctui fecit: iamque nono die rite completis apud tumulum sollemnibus familiam supellectilemque et omnia iumenta ad hereditariam deducit auctionem: tunc unum Larem varie dispergit venditionis incertae licentiosa fortuna. Me denique ipsum pauperculus quidam hortulanus comparat quinquaginta nummis, magno, ut aiebat, sed ut communi labore victum sibi quaereret.
But when all the corn was ground that was ready to hand, and the servants were compelled to call their master to give them more, they called very often at his chamber door, and asked that they might have further matter for their labour, But when no person gave answer to their often and loud crying, they knocked louder to none effect: then they began to mistrust, in so much that with great pushing they brake open the door, which was very closely barred; but when they were come in, they could not find the woman, but only their master hanging dead upon a rafter of the chamber. Thereupon they cried and lamented greatly, and took his body from the noose; and according to the custom, when they had mourned him much and washed the body, they performed all the funeral rites and buried him, much people attending. The next morrow the daughter of the baker, which was married but a little before to one of the next village, came crying with hair awry and beating her breast: not because she heard of the sad fortune of her house by the message of any man, but because her father's lamentable spirit, with a halter about his neck, appeared to her in the night, declaring the whole circumstance of the matter; of the wickedness of her stepmother and her whoredom, of the witchcraft and how by enchantment he was descended to hell. After that she had lamented a good space, and was then somewhat comforted by the servants of the house and had ceased therefrom, and when nine days were expired, and all was duly done at the tomb, as inheritress to her father she sold away all the substance of the house, both slaves and furniture and beasts, whereby the goods of one household chanced by the operation of fortune into divers men's hands.
Res ipsa mihi poscere videtur ut huius quoque servitii mei disciplinam exponam. Matutino me multis holeribus onustum proxumam civitatem deducere consuerat dominus atque ibi venditoribus tradita merce dorsum insidens meum sic hortum redire. Ac dum fodiens, dum irrigans ceteraque incurvus labore deservit, ego tantisper otiosus placida quiete recreabar. Sed ecce siderum ordinatis ambagibus per numeros dierum ac mensuum remeans annus, post mustulentas autumni delicias ad hibernas Capricorni pruinas deflexerat et assiduis pluviis nocturnisque rorationibus sub dio et intecto conclusus stabulo continuo discruciabar frigore, quippe cum meus dominus prae nimia paupertate ne sibi quidem, nedum mihi posset stramen aliquod vel exiguum tegimen parare, sed frondoso casulae contentus umbraculo degeret. Ad hoc matutino lutum nimis frigidum gelusque praeacuta frusta nudis invadens pedibus enitebar, ac ne suetis saltem cibariis ventrem meum replere poteram; namque et mihi et ipsi domino cena par ac similis, oppido tamen tenuis aderat, lactucae veteres et insuaves illae, quae seminis enormi senecta ad instar scoparum in amaram caenosi succus cariem exolescunt.
There was a poor gardener amongst the rest, which bought me for the sum of fifty pence, which seemed, to him a great price, but he thought to gain it again by the common travail of himself and me. The matter requireth to tell likewise, how I was handled in his service. This gardener accustomed to drive me every morning laden with herbs to the next village, and there, when he had sold his herbs, he would mount upon my back and return to the garden. Now while he digged the ground, and watered the herbs, and bent himself to his other business, I did nothing but repose myself with great ease: but when the signs of heaven were turned in their ordained courses, and the year in due order passed by days and by months from the pleasant delights of the autumn unto Capricorn, with sharp hail, rain, and wintry frosts, I had no stable, but standing always under a hedgeside, beneath the unceasing rain and the dews of night, was well nigh killed with cold; for my master was so poor that he had no lodging for himself, much less he had any litter or place to cover me withal; but he himself always lay under a little roof, shadowed and covered with boughs. In the morning when I walked, I had no shoes to my hoofs to pass upon the sharp ice and frosty mire, neither could I fill my belly with meat as I accustomed to do; for my master and I supped together and had both one fare, and it was very slender, since we had nothing else saving old and unsavoury salads, which were suffered to grow for seed, like long brooms, and all their sweet sap and juice had become bitter and stinking. It fortuned on a day that an honest man of the next village was benighted, and constrained, by reason of the rain and that it was dark without moon, to lodge (his horse being very weary) in our garden;
Nocte quadam paterfamilias quidam de pago proxumo tenebris inluniae caliginis impeditus et imbre nimio madefactus, atque ob id ab itinere directo cohibitus, ad hortulum nostrum iam fesso equo deverterat receptusque comiter pro tempore, licet non delicato, necessario tamen quietis subsidio, remunerari benignum hospitem cupiens promittit ei de praediis suis sese daturum et frumenti et olivi aliquid et amplius duos vini cados. Nec moratus meus sacculo et utribus vacuis secum apportatis nudae spinae meae residens ad sexagesimum stadium profectionem comparat. Eo iam confecto viae spatio pervenimus ad praedictos agros, ibique statim meum dominum comis hospes opipari prandio participat. Iamque iis poculis mutuis altercantibus mirabile prorsus evenit ostentum. Una de cetera cohorte gallina per mediam cursitans aream clangore genuino velut ovum parere gestiens personabat. Eam suus dominus intuens “O bona” inquit “Ancilla et satis fecunda quae multo iam tempore cotidianis nos partubus saginasti! Nunc etiam cogitas, ut video, gustulum nobis praeparare.” Et “heus ” inquit “Puer, calathum fetui gallinaceo destinatum angulo solita collocato.” Ita uti fuerat iussum procurante puero, gallina consuetae lecticulae spreto cubili ante ipsos pedes domini praematurum sed magno prorsus futurum scrupulo prodidit partum: non enim ovum, quod scimus illud, sed pinnis et unguibus et oculis et voce etiam perfectum edidit pullum, qui matrem suam coepit continuo comitari.
where although he was but meanly received, yet served well enough considering time and necessity. This honest man, to recompense our kindly entertainment, promised to give my master some corn, oil, and two bottles of wine: therefore my master, not delaying the matter, laded me with a sack and empty bottles, and sat upon my bare back and rode to the town, which was seven miles off. When we came to the honest man's farm, he entertained and feasted my master exceedingly; and it fortuned while they ate and drank together in great amity, there chanced a strange and dreadful case; for there was a hen which ran cackling about the yard, even as though she would have laid an egg; the good man of the house, perceiving her, said: “O good and profitable pullet, that now for so long hast fed us every day with thy fruit, thou seemest as though thou wouldst give us some pittance for our dinner. Oh, boy, put the pannier in the accustomed corner that the hen may lay.” Then the boy did as his master commanded, but the hen, forsaking her accustomed litter, came towards her master, and laid at his feet an offspring too early indeed, and one that should betoken great ill to come; for it was not an egg which every man knoweth, but a chicken, with feathers, claws, and eyes, nay even with a voice, which incontinently ran peeping after his dame.
Nec eo setius longe maius ostentum, et quod omnes merito perhorrescerent, exoritur: sub ipsa enim mensa, quae reliquias prandii gerebat, terra dehiscens imitus largissimum emicuit sanguinis fontem 1; hinc resultantes uberrimae guttae mensam cruore perspergunt. Ipsoque illo momento, quo stupore defixi mirantur ac trepidant divina praesagia, concurrit unus e cella vinaria nuntians omne vinum, quod olim diffusum fuerat, in omnibus doliis ferventi calore et prorsus ut igne copioso subdito rebullire. Visae interea mustelae etiam mortuum serpentem forinsecus mordicus attrahentes, et de ore pastoricii canis virens exsiluit ranula, ipsumque canem qui proximus consistebat aries appetitum unico morsu strangulavit. Haec tot ac talia ingenti pavore domini illius et familiae totius ad extremum stuporem deiecerant animos, quid prius quidve posterius, quid magis quid minus, numinum caelestium leniendis minis quot et qualibus procuraretur hostiis.
By and by happened a more strange thing which would cause any man to abhor; for under the very table whereon was the rest of their meat, the ground opened, and there appeared a great well and fountain of blood, in so much that the drops thereof sprinkled about the table. At the same time, while they wondered at this dreadful sight, and feared that which the gods should presage thereby, one of the servants came running out of the cellar, and told that all the wine, which had long before been racked off, was boiled out of the vessels, as though there had been some great fire under. By and by without the house weasels were seen that drew with their teeth a dead serpent; and out of the mouth of a shepherd's dog leaped a green frog, and immediately after a ram that stood hard by leaped upon the same dog and strangled him with one bite. All these things that happened horribly astonished the good man of the house and the residue that were present, in so much they could not tell how they stood on what to do, which first and which last, which more and which less, or with what or how many sacrifices to appease the anger of the gods. While every man was thus stricken in fear of some hideous thing that should come to pass, behold one brought word to the good man of the house of a great and terrible mishap. For he had three sons who had been brought up in good literature and endued with good manners, in whom he greatly gloried.
Adhuc omnibus expectatione taeterrimae formidinis torpidis accurrit quidam servulus magnas et postremas domino illi fundorum clades annuntians. Namque is adultis iam tribus liberis doctrina instructis et verecundia praeditis vivebat gloriosus. His adulescentibus erat cum quodam paupere modicae casulae domino vetus familiaritas: at enim casulae parvulae conterminos magnos et beatos agros possidebat vicinus potens et dives et iuvenis, sed prosapiae maiorum gloria male utens pollensque factionibus et cuncta facile faciens in civitate: hic hostili modo vicini tenuis incursabat pauperiem pecua trucidando, boves abigendo, fruges adhuc immaturas obterendo. Iamque tota frugalitate spoliatum ipsis etiam glebulis exterminare gestiebat finiumque inani commota quaestione terram totam sibi vindicabat. Tunc agrestis, verecundus alioquin, avaritia divitis iam spoliatus, ut suo saltem sepulchro paternum retineret solum, amicos plurimos ad demonstiationem finium trepidans eximie corrogarat: aderant inter alios tres illi fratres cladibus amici quantulum quantulum ferentes auxilium.
Now they three had great acquaintance and ancient amity with a poor man, which was their neighbour and dwelled hard by them in a little cottage. And next unto that little cottage dwelled another young man very rich both in lands and goods, but using ill the pride of his high descent, very factious, and ruling himself in the town according to his own will. This young royster did mortally hate this poor man, in so much that he would kill his sheep, steal his oxen, and spoil his corn and other fruits before the time of ripeness; yet was he not contented with this spoiling of his thrift, but he burned to encroach upon the poor man's ground and by some empty quarrel of boundaries claimed all his heritage as his own. The poor man, which was very simple and fearful, seeing all his goods taken away by the avarice of the rich man, called together and assembled many of his friends to shew them in much fear the metes and bounds of his land, to the end he might at least have so much ground of his father's heritage as might bury him. Amongst whom he found these three brethren as friends to help and aid him as far as they might in his adversity and tribulation. Howbeit the presence of all these honest citizens could in no wise persuade or frighten this madman to leave his power and extortion, and though at the first he did shew temperance in his tongue, yet of a sudden, the more they went about with gentle words to tell him his faults, the more would he fret and fume, swearing all the oaths under God, and pledging his own life and his dearest, that he little regarded the presence of the whole city, and incontinently he would command his servants to take the poor man by the ears, and carry him out of his cottage and thrust him afar off. This greatly offended all the standers-by;
Nec tamen ille vesanus tantillum praesentia multorum civium territus vel etiam confusus, licet non rapinis, saltem verbis temperare voluit sed, illis clementer expostulantibus fervidosque eius mores blanditiis permulcentibus, repente suam suorumque carorum salutem quam sanctissime adiurans asseverat parvi se pendere tot mediatorum praesentiam; denique vicinum illum auriculis per suos servulos sublatum de casula longissime statimque proiectum iri: quo dicto insignis indignatio totos audientium pertemptavit animos. Tunc unus e tribus fratribus incunctanter et paulo liberius respondit, frustra eum suis opibus confisum tyrannica superbia comminari, cum alioquin pauperes etiam liberali legum praesidio de insolentia locupletium consueverint vindicari. Quod oleum flammae, quod sulphur incendio, quod flagellum Furiae, hoc et iste sermo truculentiae hominis nutrimento fuit. Iamque ad extremam insaniam vecors suspendium sese et totis illis et ipsis legibus mandare proclamans, canes pastoricios villaticos, feros atque immanes, assuetos abiecta per agros, essitare cadavera, praeterea etiam transeuntium viatorum passivis solito pastorum incensi atque inflammati sunt, furiosa rabie conciti et latratibus etiam absonis horribiles, eunt in homines eosque variis aggressi vulneribus distrahunt ac lacerant, nec fugientibus saltem compescunt sed eo magis irritatiores sequuntur.
and then forthwith one of the brethren spake unto him somewhat boldly, saying: “It is but a folly to have such affiance in your riches, and to use your tyrannous pride to threaten, when as the law is common for the poor alike, and a redress may be had by it to suppress the insolence of the rich.” These words made his harsh temper to burn more than oil on flames, or brimstone in a fire, or a Fury's scourge of whips, and he became furious to madness, saying that they should be all hanged and their laws too, before he would be subject to any person: and therewithal he called out his bandogs and great mastiffs that followed the sheep on his farm, which accustomed to eat the carrion and carcasses of dead beasts in the fields, and had been trained to set upon such as passed by the way. These he commanded should be put upon all the assistants to tear them in pieces; and as soon as they heard the accustomed hiss of their masters the shepherds, ran fiercely upon them, roused to madness, and barking very horridly, invading them on every side, wounding and tearing them, and not sparing even them that sought to fly, in so much that the more they fled to escape away, the more cruel and terrible were the dogs. It fortuned amongst all this fearful company, that in running the youngest of the three brethren stumbled at a stone, and bruising his toes fell down to the ground to be a prey to these wild and furious dogs, and they came upon him and tare him in pieces with their teeth, whereby he cried out bitterly: his other two brethren, hearing his lamentable voice, ran towards him to help him, casting their cloaks about their left arms, and took up stones to defend their brother and chase away the dogs. But all was in vain, for they could not make to cease nor drive away the fierce beasts, but they must see their brother dismembered in every part of his body; who, lying at the very point of death, desired his brethren to revenge his death against the cruel tyrant, and therewithal he gave up the ghost.
Tunc inter confertam trepidae multitudinis stragem e tribus iunior offenso lapide atque obtunsis digitis terrae prosternitur, saevisque illis ac ferocissimis canibus instruit nefariam dapem: protenus enim nancti praedam iacentem miserum illum adulescentem frustatim discerpunt. Atque ut eius letalem ululatum cognovere ceteri fratres, accurrunt maesti suppetias, obvolutisque lacinia laevis manibus lapidum crebris iactibus propugnare fratri atque abigere canes aggrediuntur. Nec tamen eorum ferociam vel conterrere vel expugnare potuere, quippe cum miserrimus adulescens ultima voce prolata, vindicarent de pollutissimo divite mortem fratris iunioris, illico laniatus interisset. Tunc reliqui fratres non tam Hercule desperata quam ultro neglecta sua salute contendunt ad divitem atque ardentibus animis impetuque vesano lapidibus crebris in eum velitantur. At ille cruentus et multis ante flagitiis similibus exercitatus percussor iniecta lancea duorum alterum per pectus medium transadegit a nec tamen peremptus ac prorsum exanimatus adulescens ille terrae concidit; nam telum transvectum atque ex maxima parte pone tergum elapsum soloque nisus violentia defixum rigore librato suspenderat corpus. Sed et quidam de servulis procerus et validus sicario illi ferens auxilium lapide contorto tertii illius iuvenis dexterum brachium longo iacui petierat, sed impetu casso per extremos digitos transi currens lapis contra omnium opinionem deciderat innoxius.
The other two brethren, perceiving so great a murder, did not only despair of their only safety, but neglected their own lives and madly dressed themselves against the tyrant, and threw a great number of stones at him; but the bloody thief, exercised to such and like mischiefs, took a spear and thrust one of them clean through the body. Howbeit, although utterly destroyed, he fell not down to the ground: for the spear that came out at his back ran into the earth with the force of the thrust and sustained him up quivering in the air. By and by came one of this tyrant's servants, the most sturdiest of the rest, to help his master; and at his first coming, he took up a stone and threw it from afar at the third brother, and struck his left arm, but by reason the stone ran by the ends of his fingers it fell to the ground and did not hurt him, which chanced otherwise than all men's expectation was. Then did this fortunate chance give the young man, that was very wise, a hope for vengeance; for he feigned that his arm was greatly wounded, and spake these words unto the cruel bloodsucker: “Now mayst thou, thou wretch, triumph upon the destruction of all our family; now mayst thou feed thy insatiable cruelty with the blood of three brethren; now mayst thou rejoice at the fall of thy fellow-citizens: yet think not but that how far soever thou dost remove and extend the bounds of thy land by depriving of poor men, thou shalt still have some neighbour: but how greatly am I sorry in that by the injustice of fate I have lost mine arm wherewithal I minded to cut off thy head.” When he had spoken these words, the furious thief was the more enraged and drew out his dagger, and running upon the young man thought verily to have slain him: but it chanced that he had attacked one no whit weaker than he, for the young man resisted him stoutly beyond all his expectation, and buckling together by violence seized his right hand: which done, he poised the weapon, and oft striking made the rich thief to give up his guilty ghost, and to the intent the young man would escape the hands of the servants, which came running to assist their master, with the same dagger that dripped with his enemy's blood he cut his own throat.
Nonnullam tamen sagacissimo iuveni proventus humanior vindictae speculam subministravit ficta namque manus suae debilitate sic crudelissimum iuvenem compellat: “Fruere exitio totius nostrae familiae et sanguine trium fratrum insatiabilem tuam crudelitatem pasce, et de prostratis tuis civibus gloriose triumpha, dum scias, licet privato suis possessionibus paupere fines usque et usque proterminaveris, habiturum te tamen vicinum aliquem. Nam haec etiam dextera, quae tuum prorsus amputasset caput, iniquitate fati confusa decidit.” Quo sermone, alioquin exasperatus, furiosus latro rapto gladio sua miserrimum iuvenem manu perempturus invadit avidus. Nec tamen sui molliorem provocarat, quippe insperato et longe contra eius opinionem resistens iuvenis complexu fortissimo arripit eius dexteram, magnoque nisu ferro librato multis et crebris ictibus impuram elidit divitis animam, et ut accurrentium etiam familiarium manu se liberaret, confestim adhuc inimici sanguine delibuto mucrone gulam sibi prorsus exsecuit. Haec erant quae prodigiosa praesagaverant ostenta, haec quae miserrimo domino fuerant nuntiata. Nec ullum verbum ac ne tacitum quidem fletum tot malis circumventus senex quivit emittere, sed arrepto ferro, quo commodum inter suos epulones caseum atque alias prandii partes diviserat, ipse quoque ad instar infelicissimi sui filii iugulum sibi multis ictibus contrucidat, quoad super mensam cernulus corruens portentuosi cruoris maculas novi sanguinis fluvio proluit.
These things were signified by the strange and dreadful wonders which fortuned in the house of the wretched man, who, after he had heard these sorrowful tidings, could in no wise even silently weep, so far was he stricken into dolour, but presently taking the knife wherewith lie had but now divided the cheese and other meat for his guests, he cut his own throat with many blows like his most unhappy son, in such sort that he fell head foremost upon the board and washed away with the streams of his blood in most miserable manner those prodigious drops which had before fallen thereon. Hereby was my master the gardener deprived of his hope, and pitying very greatly the evil fortune of the house, which in a brief moment of time had thus fallen in ruins, and getting instead of his dinner the watery tears of his eyes, and clapping oft-times together his empty hands, mounted upon my back, and so we went homeward the same way as we came. Yet was our return not free from harm: for as we passed by the way we met with a tall soldier (for so his habit and countenance declared) which was a legionary, who with proud and arrogant words spake to my master in this sort: “Whither lead you this ass unladen?” My master, still somewhat astonished and fearful at the strange sights which he saw before, and ignorant of the Latin tongue, rode on and spake never a word. The soldier, unable to refrain his proper insolence and offended at his silence as it were an insult, struck him with a vine-stick which he held on the shoulders, and thrust him from my back. Then my master gently made answer that he knew not his tongue and so understood not what he said; whereat the soldier angrily demanded again, but in Greek, whither he rode with his ass: “Marry,” quoth he, “To the next city.” “But I,” quoth the soldier, “Have need of his help, to carry the trusses of our captain with the other beasts from yonder castle”;
Ad istum modum puncto brevissimo dilapsae'! domus fortunam hortulanus ille miseratus suosque casus graviter ingemescens, deprensis pro prandio lacrimis vacuasque manus complodens saepicule, protinus inscenso me retro, quam veneramus, viam capessit. Nec innoxius ei saltem regressus evenit: nam i quidam procerus et, ut indicabat habitus atque habitudo, miles e legione, factus nobis obvius, superbo atque arroganti sermone percontatur quorsum vacuum duceret asinum: at meus adhuc maerore permixtus et alias Latini sermonis ignarus, tacitus praeteribat. Nec miles ille familiarem cohibere quivit insolentiam sed indignatus silentio eius ut convicio, viti quam tenebat obtundens eum dorso meo proturbat. Tunc, hortulanus supplicue respondit sermonis ignorantia se quid ille diceret scire non posse: ergo igitur Graece subiciens miles “Ubi” inquit “Ducis asinum istum?” Respondit hortulanus petere se civitatem proxumam. “Sed mihi” inquit “Operae eius opus est; nam de proxumo castello sarcinas praesidis nostri cum ceteris iumentis debet advenere,” et iniecta statim manu loro me, quo ducebar, arreptum incipit trahere. Sed hortulanus prioris plagae vulnere prolapsum capite sanguinem detergens rursus deprecatur civibus atque mansuetius versari commilitonem, idque per spes prosperas eius orabat adiurans. “Nam et hic ipse” aiebat “Iners: asellus et nihilo minus morbo detestabili caducus vix etiam paucos holerum manipulos de proxumo hortulo solet anhelitu languido fatigatus subvehere, nedum ut rebus amplioribus idoneus videatur gerulus.”
and therewithal he took me by the halter, and would violently have I taken me away: but my master, wiping away from his head the blood of the blow which he received of the soldier, desired him gently and civilly to take some pity upon him, and to let him depart with his own, conjuring him by all that he hoped of good fortune, and affirming that his slow ass, well nigh dead with sickness, could scarce carry a few handfuls of herbs from his garden hard by, being very scant of breath; much less he was able to bear any greater trusses. But when he saw the soldier would in no wise be entreated, but was the more bent on his destruction, and ready with his staff to cleave my master's head with its thicker part, being desperate he fell down grovelling at his feet, under colour to touch his knees and move him to some pity; but when he saw his time, he took the soldier by the legs and cast him upon the ground: then straightway he buffeted him, thumped him, bit him, and took a stone and beat his face and his sides, so that he, being first laid along the ground, could not turn or defend himself, but only threaten that if ever he rose he would chop him in pieces. The gardener, when he heard him say so, was advised and drew out his sword which he had by his side, and when he had thrown it far away, he knocked and beat him more cruelly than he did before, in so much that the soldier as he lay all hurt with wounds could not tell by what means to save himself, but only by feigning he was dead. Then my master took the sword and mounted upon my back, riding straight in all haste to the next village; but he had no regard to go to his garden, and when he came thither, he turned into one of his friends' house and declared all the whole matter, desiring him to save his life, and to hide himself and his ass awhile in some secret place, that he might be hid for the space of two or three days, until such time as all danger were past. Then his friend, not forgetting the ancient amity between them, entertained him willingly, and tying my legs drew me up a pair of stairs into a chamber, while my master, remaining in the shop, crept into a chest and lay hidden there with the cover closed fast.
Sed ubi nullis precibus mitigari militem magisque in suam perniciem advertit efferari, iamque inversa vite de vastiore nodulo cerebrum suum diffindere, currit ad extrema subsidia, simulansque e re ad commovendam miserationem genua eius velle contingere, summissus atque incurvatus, arreptis eius utrisque pedibus sublimem elatum terrae graviter applodit, et statim qua pugnis, qua cubitis, qua morsibus, etiam de via lapide correpto totam faciem manusque eius et latera converberat Nec ille ut primum humi supinatus est, vel repugnare vel omnino munire se potuit sed plane identidem comminabatur, si surrexisset, sese concisurum eum machaera sua frustatim. Quo sermone eius commonefactus hortulanus eripit ei spatham eaque longissime abiecta rursum saevioribus eum plagis aggreditur: nec ille prostratus et praeventus vulneribus ullum repperire saluti quiens subsidium, quod solum restabat, simulat sese mortuum. Tunc spatham illam secum asportans hortulanus inscenso me concito gradu recta festinat ad civitatem, nec hortulum suum saltem curans invisere, ad quempiam sibi devertit familiarem, cunctisque narratis deprecatur periclitanti sibi ferret auxilium seque cum suo sibi asino tantisper occultaret, quoad celatus spatio bidui triduive capitalem causam evaderet. Nec oblitus ille veteris amicitiae prompte suscipit, meque per scalas complicitis pedibus in superius cenaculum attracto, hortulanus deorsus in ipsa tabernacula derepit in quandam cistulam et superingesto delitescit orificio.
The soldier (as I afterwards learned) rose up at last as one awakened from a drunken sleep, but he could scarce go by reason of his wounds, howbeit, at length, by little and little, through aid of his staff, he came to the town; but he would not declare the matter to any person, nor complain to any justice, but inwardly digested his injury, lest he should be accused of cowardice or dastardness. Yet in the end he told some of his companions of all the matter that happened; but they advised him that he should remain for a while closed in some secret place, thinking that beside the injury which he had received, he should be accused of the breach of his faith and soldier's oath, by reason of the loss of his sword,1 and that they should diligently learn the signs and appearance of my master and me to search him out and take vengeance upon him. At last, there was an unfaithful neighbour that told them where we were: then incontinently the soldiers went to the justice, declaring that they had lost by the way a silver goblet of their captain's, very precious, and that a gardener had found it, who, refusing to render up the goblet, was hidden in one of his friends' house. By and by the magistrate, understanding the loss of the captain, and who he was, came to the doors where we were, and in a loud voice exhorted our host that it were better to deliver up my master than to incur pain of death; for most certainly he was hiding us. Howbeit, these threatenings could not enforce him to confess that he was within his doors, and he was nothing afraid, but by reason of his faithful promise, and for the safeguard of his friend, he said that he knew naught of us, nor saw he the gardener a great while. The soldiers said contrary, swearing by the deity of the Emperor that he lay there, and nowhere else. Whereby, to know the verity of the matter, the magistrates commanded their serjeants and ministers to search every corner of the house; but there they could find nobody, neither gardener nor ass. Then was there a great contention between the soldiers and our host, for they said we were within the house, calling often upon Caesar in their oaths;
At miles ille, ut postea didici, tandem velut emersus gravi crapula, nutabundus tamen et tot plagarum dolore saucius baculoque se vix sustinens civitatem adventat, confususque de impotentia deque inertia sua quicquam ad quemquam referre popularium, sed tacitus iniuriam devorans, quosdam commilitones nanctus, is tantum clades enarrat suas. Placuit ut ipse quidem contubernio se tantisper absconderet (nam praeter propriam contumeliam militaris etiam sacramenti genium ob amissam spatham verebatur), ipsi autem signis nostris enotatis investigationi vindictaeque sedulam darent operam: nec defuit vicinus perfidus qui nos illico occultari nuntiaret. Tum commilitones accersitis magistratibus mentiuntur sese multi pretii vasculum argenteum praesidis in via perdidisse, idque hortulanum quendam repperisse nec velle restituere, sed apud familiarem quendam sibi delitescere. Tunc magistratus et damno et praesidis nomine cognito veniunt ad deversorii nostri fores claraque voce denuntiant hospiti nostro nos, quos occultaret apud se certo certius, dedere potius quam discrimen proprii subiret capitis. Nec ille tantillum conterritus salutique studens eius quem in suam receperat fidem, quicquam de nobis fatetur ac diebus plusculis nec vidisse quidem illum hortulanum contendit: contra commilitones ibi nec uspiam illum delitescere adiurantes genium principis contendebant. Postremum magistratibus placuit obstinate denegantem scrutinio detegere; immissis itaque lictoribus ceterisque publicis ministeriis angulatim cuncta sedulo perlustrari iubent: nec quisquam mortalium ac ne ipse quidem asinus intra limen comparere nuntiatur.
and he said no, and swore much and often by all the gods to the same intent. But I, that was an ass very curious and restless in my nature, when I heard so great a noise craned my neck and put my head out of a little window to learn what the stir and tumult did signify. It fortuned that one of the soldiers, spying about, perceived my shadow, whereupon he began to cry, saying that he had certainly seen me: then they were all glad and a great shouting arose, and they brought a ladder and came up into the chamber and pulled me down like a prisoner; and when they had found me, they doubted nothing of the gardener, but seeking about more narrowly, at length they found him couched in a chest. And so they brought out the poor gardener to the justices, who was committed immediately to prison, in order that he might suffer the pain of death; but they could never forbear laughing and jesting how I looked out from my window: from which, and from my shadow, is risen the common proverb of the peeping and shadow of an ass.1 The next day how my master the gardener sped I know not, but the gentle soldier, who had been so well beaten for his exceeding cowardice, led me from my manger to his lodging (as it seemed to me) without the contradiction of any man.
Tunc gliscit violentior utrimquesecus contentio: militum pro comperto de nobis asseverantium fidemque Caesaris identidem implorantium, at illius negantis assidueque deum numen obtestantis. Qua contentione et clamoso strepitu cognito, curiosus alioquin et inquieti procacitate praeditus asinus, dum obliquata cervice per quandam fenestrulam quidnam sibi vellet tumultus ille prospicere gestio, unus e commilitonibus casu fortuito collimatis oculis ad umbram meam cunctos testatur incoram. Magnus denique continuo clamor exortus est, et emensis protenus scalis iniecta manu quidam me velut captivum detrahunt. Iamque omni sublata cunctatione scrupulosius contemplantes singula, cista etiam illa revelata repertum productumque et oblatum magistratibus miserum hortulanum, poenas scilicet capite pensurum in publicum deducunt carcerem, summoque risu meum prospectum cavillari non desiliunt. Unde etaim de prospectu et umbra asini natum est frequens proverbium.